About not being let back in to pew after Communion

[DaveBj]

Reading threads like this one makes me SO-O-O grateful for the people in our parish

D

 

[PetraG]

It is open to debate whether alerting people to this or tolerating it does more good for you and them in the eyes of God.

I think it is a prudential decision you do your best with at the time, yes. For me, “don’t throw pearls before swine” means that you do best to confine fraternal corrections and evangelization to those who might welcome what you have to say. You can correct me and I can correct you because we each trust that the other is here to discuss and learn. Maybe we change our minds and maybe we don’t, but you don’t seem like the kind who’ll make a fight out of it. (Plus, we’re not at Mass, so it is not so disruptive when somebody here gets a bit feisty, LOL.)

 

[TheOldColonel]

Be prepared if this spiritual self-centered behavior happens again. I suggest you confront them politely at the very moment this would recur. I would say, “Excuse me. We’re trying to get back to our seats. Would you be so kind as to let us through?” Even if there is no charity or civility in them, sheer embarrassment will move them.

A homily was preached in my parish on this very topic. The pastor, among other things, said, “If you don’t even have the common courtesy to share the space in this church, what makes you think you’re ready to share heaven with the saints?”

 

[FollowChrist34]

I am much more mild mannered in person than on CAF; I sincerely hope most of us can say this! I think ‘manners’ are not just a nice touch; they are Christian. I don’t like bad manners. And I actually believe the Holy Spirit guides us in this - whether to correct or dismiss. No question, give others the benefit of the doubt. But if you have awareness and knowledge or a higher principle is at stake, that is different. There is an obligation. I believe if you live in Christ you grow in the Holy Spirit and he basically takes over - you do the right thing, peacefully. And this can involve throwing out money changers and/or turning the other cheek. It is a mystery which to do until that moment. If your heart is open and in a good place, 9 times out of 10 you will do the right thing. (also use Aristotle’s golden mean: it you are naturally inclined to correction, error on the side of dismissing when in doubt and vice versa) Last point, I also think it is MORE important to do both in society, in Mass, anywhere, than on CAF. There should not be a moment when you don’t reflect your faith, right? Let’s not correct here and just dismiss in real life, please. Maybe this can be kind of a training ground for teaching dismissers to correct and correctors to dismiss…
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[ShowersofRoses]

Such good advice has been given, thank you all. I hope next time I can speak up and gently ask them to let me through. It was an undercurrent of hostility in their actions/looks that really threw me for a loop, totally unexpected. After the bliss of just receiving Communion, it was sort of like whiplash to be treated like that, and I just left and walked around so I wouldn’t disturb anyone else. Normally all I’ve ever usually received was kindness at church, so this was very surprising.

I do try to bear these little faults and grievances and overlook them in others, but obviously I’m still far from perfect! Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner. Thanks for the advice to both have courage to speak up and to also bear life’s burdens patiently.

 

[rondirect]

It was an undercurrent of hostility in their actions/looks that really threw me for a loop, totally unexpected. After the bliss of just receiving Communion, it was sort of like whiplash to be treated like that, and I just left and walked around so I wouldn’t disturb anyone else. Normally all I’ve ever usually received was kindness at church, so this was very surprising.

I do try to bear these little faults and grievances and overlook them in others, but obviously I’m still far from perfect! Lord, have mercy on me, a sinner. Thanks for the advice to both have courage to speak up and to also bear life’s burdens patiently.

Showerofroses for you today! Happy Mother’s Day to you and to all mom’s everywhere.

I know I said it before, but IMO, you were the better person in this situation and handled it perfectly. For the rest of us, we were not there, we do not know what the 2 elderly people where thinking or thinking at all. Perhaps they were just as confused as showerofroses was. Yes, at times, people are deliberate in their un-Christian way they do things, especially in church. And we, like Shower, should “bear life’s burdens patiently” and move on. A lesson for me as well. A daily struggle for us all.

 

[Isca]

In my Italian church this morning - as usual, I had a whole pew to myself. No problems with where folk sit. No-one minds if you take “their” seat and the church isn’t very full. You often have to walk a bit to find someone to shake hands with during the Peace.

When it’s time to receive, it’s just a bit of a free-for-all, there’s no “one pew at a time” rule.

Today there was a baptism taking place during the Mass, and members of the baptismal party just wandered in and out all the time. I was very impressed by the lovely baby - she was good as gold through the very long homily, and then as soon as the priest began the baptism she began screaming and wouldn’t stop. It was picked up by his mic and it filled the church. For a small child (about 7 or 8 months) she had very powerful lungs. The priest kind of completed the ceremony in sections, around the screams.

It’s great here, I’ve found myself at funerals and several weddings at the regular Sunday Mass. You never know what’s going to be going on.

 

[Wendy1989]

My pastor actually makes the rounds for the disabled. We also have the cup and whoever has the cup, follows Father. That being said - we’ve nicknamed our pastor ‘Ninja Priest’. He moves FAST! His idea of walking slow is still fast. Whoever has the cup has to almost run after Father!

 

[Norseman82]

I really don’t believe you would do that: step on the seat of the pew? “Why be charitable to rude people?” Because you are in church and just received communion. You’re not in a movie theater. Playing the game of who’s right in church doesn’t sit well with me. I really don’t think would be that way.

Access to her children was involved here.

Seriously, “bearing wrongs patiently” only enables bad behavior.

if these inconsiderate people normally attend this Mass, perhaps offer a Mass for the “conversion of inconsiderate pew blockers”?

 

[Norseman82]

I would say, “Excuse me. We’re trying to get back to our seats. Would you be so kind as to let us through?” Even if there is no charity or civility in them, sheer embarrassment will move them.

And say it louder and louder until the people nearby or the ushers take notice.

 

[woolycaterpillar]

We have quite a few people who take forever to walk out of the church. They stand in groups to talk, and then some of them shuffle slowly down to the entrance. I tripped on one of them. Kind of embarrassing.

 

[ConfusedLucy]

I just know I would do that in an attempt to be “discreet”

 

[anon10271182]

Incredible.
Kids step over my legs all time when I’m kneeling. But that’s only in our FSSP parish, which has more space front to back.

 

[ShowersofRoses]

Yes, we have very tight pew space. I was certain if I tried to step over their legs I would clumsily trip on them…I’d never try that. And I think I’d be really upset if someone did that to me, except for a child perhaps…too intrusive in my personal space. But I’d be willing to get up and let them in without all that bother.

 

[rondirect]

Access to her children was involved here.

Seriously, “bearing wrongs patiently” only enables bad behavior.

I know. I am sure she had a view of her children when walking around. I still think she handled it the best manner without causing issue. I believe we should “bear wrongs patiently.” If not, look what happens with road rage, public violence, etc. This was in a church, not in a football stadium. It is not our job to correct a stranger’s bad behavior.

And say it louder and louder until the people nearby or the ushers take notice.

Yes; say it louder and louder, so that at the most sacred moments during the Communion Rite is disturbed and all the people see is you shouting at people kneeling in prayer. Who would everyone think is wrong in that case? Then talk to the ushers during this time and explain? I don’t think so.

Showers: So sorry this happened, but again, you were the better person here, took the higher road, and took the correct action.

 

[BoyGenius]

on’t think Mary of Bethany (i.e. the sister of Martha) is actually the same person as Mary Magdalene?

So she wasn’t ‘a sinner becoming a saint’ in that sense. I know we are all sinners in a broader sense.

The “Mary” (as I will leave out Bethany, Magdalene, Cleophus, etc.) - as there are many Mary’s throughout the Gospel - (the Mary) that with tears wiped the feet of Christ. And the Mary who held Christ’s feet at the Resurrection, re-assures the personality of the one sole person in both cases. Now, is Mary, the sister of Martha not Mary Magdalene? Well, she was at the Lord’s feet, listening. That by far illustrates the same person. It is quite possible the very reason they don’t always refer to her as Magdalene, but as the sister of Martha, because what the Pharisee said, do you not know what sort of woman this is? The calling out someone so steeped in sin, that her reputation from her sins, would had placed scandal on the Apostle’s, Christ, and His mission. The Pharisee’s were notoriously meriting those whom God esteemed. Meaning those were not so steeped into sin. And Jesus rebuked them several times for that. Perhaps the authors of the New Testament, the four Gospel writers and how it was dictated to them from the Apostle’s, had charity on Mary (Magdalane’s - inserting her name now) life, because it might had been a blight about her. And subsequently made it hard to realize Jesus could save and not only just forgive a woman like her, for her sins. And the closeness she had as a follower of Christ. And so, the Gospel writers allow us to see her life in the fullest. A transformation by grace. A miracle. And as Jesus worked in her, that He also worked to draw Martha closer. Jesus restored a household fallen apart (Lazarus, Martha, and Mary.) Rather than just focusing on the singular sins Mary had committed and been forgiven. So she is referred to in a familial sense, rather than the secluded sense of her sins. Jesus restored them all. Even Lazarus who was at death and was buried.

 

[ShastaRose]

I usually have the opposite problem. I get back to the pew and there’s nobody there. So many of our parishioners just clear out after receiving the Eucharist. They have been told by the priest that this is rather impolite, but they continue to do it. Shows very little respect, in my opinion.

 

[2towers]

People have never had any qualms about telling me to get out of the way! Next time you might just get down there and kneel right with them!!! [They might get out of the way pretty fast then]

 

[ShowersofRoses]

Haha, this last Sunday, those same ladies were there again with another gentlemen. Same scenario, except I didn’t have my kids. I came back after receiving the cup and scooted into the pew. This time they were much friendlier and stayed standing so I could squeeze past them. I think last time must have just been a weird fluke when I caught them about to kneel and they just zoned out or something. At least, I’d rather take a positive view of it. But who knows?

 

[po18guy]

Pray for them. You could also ask them about it.