'Adult' surprise for husband.

[Bezant]

 

[atheistgirl]

I can’t believe I’m going to respond to this mindless tripe but ,oh well, it’s saturday night and I’m bored,so here we go. Ah, nah.

Mindless tripe

There are some 200,000 threads on here at the moment. You might want to ask yourself why you just couldn’t resist visiting this one, and posting, despite having nothing of any interest or worth, to say.

Sarah x

 

[Trunicate09]

Yes, and I’m sure you knew the answer already before you decided to post the question

 

[edwest2]

As I said, the secular world has attempted to make people believe these things are normal and not disordered.

That’s the message here. “Hey. What’s the big deal?”

Uh, open scandal. Keep your private life private.

Peace,
Ed

 

[atheistgirl]

Well, then it is still porn if it is you doing it.

I would disagree. It’s erotica. Intimate marital erotica which I think is very natural and very healthy.

Another thing to consider is that if your husband has problems with porn, such a video could cause him to fall into that and start looking at other women in porn videos.

He doesn’t

Sarah x

 

[atheistgirl]

It’s quite interesting to note the long term posters with high post counts and a charitable disposition are interested in clarifying why an ‘adult’ media between a married couple could still be pornography, while new posters barely breaking double digits are just slinging insults and trolling the thread.

How interesting.

Sarah x

 

[triumphguy]

But I want to give him this ‘avatar’ of me. I know how much he enjoys certain things, and I know how much he loves to see me dance, so I want to give him that because I know what it means to him.

I want him to have that of me when he’s away. I can’t see how this objectifies me in any way. It’s simply another way to share myself with my husband, when he can’t be with me.

Of course, there’s all the usual stuff - the normal expressions that happen between a man and wife when they’re apart.

And it’s not always too serious either

There’s a recording of me dressed up doing Bob Dylan’s Subterranean Homesick Blues with all the cards but voiced over to relate to something else and the cards all relating to that and he laughed for days and still talks about it even though it was years ago now.

I do this kinda thing.

It’s not all adult stuff, and it’s not always adult stuff.

But it occasionally is.

And I’m struggling to see how this could be classed as pornography.

Sarah x

It’s your private life. No-one can see the vids except you and hubby. It’s up to you to decide if it’s porn or not since you are an atheist, and our judgement from a natural law point of view should be of no interest.

I could not possibly say, 'cos your idea of what might be “adult” may not be mine - or anyone else’s.

Which is why I used qualifiers in my previous answer.

Typically, though, healthy Catholics are not prudes, nor is Catholicism prudish. Objections arise when someone is objectified, or used for pleasure and where the procreative/unitive act is not possible, and the sexual relations occur outside marriage.

 

[cheezey]

!!!

 

[superamazingman]

Here’s the thing, atheistgirl.

You came to a catholic forum. You asked about the church’s teaching on an issue. People told you, plainly. In addition to that, they gave prudential reasons why you wouldn’t.

You respond that the church’s teaching doesn’t mean anything.

Why are you really in this thread?

hmmm…

 

[Trunicate09]

Personally I see nothing wrong with it. You are not breaking any laws by doing so, yet the question was from the perspective “a sin in the eyes of the Catholic Church?”. So from that perspective, yes, it would be wrong.

 

[TimothyH]

So why is it sinful?

Sarah x

Allow me to be crystal clear.

Your husband will see it and masturbate. Masturbation is a sin. You have therefor led your husband to sin and contributed the possiblity that he spends eternity in Hell.

To lead someone to sin is a sin. Christ said, “Woe to him by whom sin comes.” By leading your husband to sin, you have jeapordized your own salvation and led yourself closer to eternity in hell.

What is the point of a video? Why not the real thing? It doesn’t make sense.

-Tim-

 

[atheistgirl]

It’s your private life. No-one can see the vids except you and hubby. It’s up to you if it’s porn or not.

So if it’s up to me, and I say I’m not sinning, I’m not sinning

(Joke - I know that’s not how it works!!!)

Sarah x

 

[superamazingman]

Allow me to be crystal clear.

Your husband will see it and masturbate. Masturbation is a sin. You have therefor led your husband to sin and contributed the possiblity that he spends eternity in Hell.

this. THAT is why it is wrong.

If it’s not explicit, it wouldn’t be an “adult surprise.” If it is, the above comment applies.

Sorry. It’s wrong.

 

[atheistgirl]

Your husband will see it and masturbate. Masturbation is a sin.

I’m aware the Church teaches that masturbation is disordered.

You’re presuming my husband is going to masturbate to the video.

What is the point of a video?

Fun.

Why not the real thing?

He’ll get the ‘real thing’ the night he comes home.

It doesn’t make sense.

It does to us.

It’s fun.

Fun in a marriage makes a lot of sense.

Sarah x

 

[CleverUserName]

Seems to me this is just a thread started to stir the pot around here.

 

[atheistgirl]

this. THAT is why it is wrong.

If it’s not explicit, it wouldn’t be an “adult surprise.” If it is, the above comment applies.

Sorry. It’s wrong.

Something can not be ‘‘explicit’’ yet be very adult.

I dance with my kids and their friends.

I dance with other moms.

I dance with my friends.

I dance for my husband.

All significantly different.

I could wear ten sweaters and still dance for my husband in a way that would be utterly inappropriate for the Church hall, and get the desired effect, without removing a single sweater.

That’s why it’s ‘adult’.

It’s only suitable for adults, and even then only adults in a certain context.

Sarah x

 

[padrepio_2012]

It’s apparent that atheistgirl is just trying to start something or is mocking the Church for her stance on "adult “” movies (even though there’s nothing mature about them) I’m pretty darn sure atheiistgirl knows why they’re wrong and I pity the fact she thinks that a movie that makes her or some other woman into an object of sex for her husband’s own selfish pleasure is a good gift. A man really loves his wife when he only views her for her looks and amount of pleasure she’ll give him! I wouldnt want my future wife to make a movie of herself to “spice things up”. In fact thinking about the girl i love doing that outrages me. I would never marry her if she did that. A man doesnt love his wiffe if she ddoes that. Or better yet when he lusts after a random woman he’s never even met! Really spices things up doesn’t it? Porn only tears a marriage apart, regardless of what you may think. It’ll happen eventually. Studies even show it. And of course the thousands of marriages destroyed by it. Of course you argue it’s not porn even though you’ve taken the gift ofsex and what it’s truly meant for and perverted it by making it into simply a pleasure thing. And as the one poster said( whom you mocked) this conversation is… wandering into bad waters so I pray we stop talking about your very personal life and either ask a real question or don’t post at all. Thank you, God bless you

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Here’s the thing, atheistgirl.

You came to a catholic forum. You asked about the church’s teaching on an issue. People told you, plainly. In addition to that, they gave prudential reasons why you wouldn’t.

You respond that the church’s teaching doesn’t mean anything.

Why are you really in this thread?

hmmm…

Wants to convert, but can’t admit it yet.

 

[CleverUserName]

It’s apparent that atheistgirl is just trying to start something or is mocking the Church for her stance on "adult “” movies.

Agree.

So let’s all hit that “unsubscribe” button now. I’ll go first…

 

[MtnDwellar]

From the Catechism:

2354 Pornography consists in removing real or simulated sexual acts from the intimacy of the partners, in order to display them deliberately to third parties.

2351 Lust is disordered desire for or inordinate enjoyment of sexual pleasure.

I don’t think the video qualifies as pornography since it is not displayed to a third party and atheistgirl never said it involved sexual acts.

I don’t think it inspires her husband to lust since the desire of sexual pleasure with one’s spouse is not disordered.

Using a cameraman and lighting crew may change things.