Advice needed from the GUYS ( For men only)

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As a married man, I think if he’s wearing the ring as a widower it either means he’s not interested in dating or he just doesn’t want to take the ring off. I think if my wife died I’d leave the ring on no matter what. Even if I wanted to date again. My Grandfather had his ring on for fifteen years after my Granny died, until he himself died. I’d say it’s the norm for widow(ers) to leave the ring, even if they meet someone else.
Nope nope nope and a whole lotta nope.

When a man is pursuing someone for marriage, he needs to be ready to give his WHOLE heart to someone, and make her #1. If he is wearing a wedding ring from his marriage to someone who has died, he is not ready.

This is the biggest sign of stay away. There are even support groups for people married to widowers.

– from someone married to a (former) widower.
 
Nope nope nope and a whole lotta nope.

When a man is pursuing someone for marriage, he needs to be ready to give his WHOLE heart to someone, and make her #1. If he is wearing a wedding ring from his marriage to someone who has died, he is not ready.

This is the biggest sign of stay away. There are even support groups for people married to widowers.

– from someone married to a (former) widower.
Well, you obviously have more experience in this than I. But speaking for myself, If my wife died I don’t think it’d be fair for me to marry again as I doubt anyone could replace her.

Perhaps there is wisdom in not marrying again. It’d feel like a betrayal to make anyone else no 1.
 
Well, you obviously have more experience in this than I. But speaking for myself, If my wife died I don’t think it’d be fair for me to marry again as I doubt anyone could replace her.
Good for you to know that. But the first step is not thinking of someone replacing her.
 
Nope nope nope and a whole lotta nope.

When a man is pursuing someone for marriage, he needs to be ready to give his WHOLE heart to someone, and make her #1. If he is wearing a wedding ring from his marriage to someone who has died, he is not ready.

This is the biggest sign of stay away. There are even support groups for people married to widowers.

– from someone married to a (former) widower.
I agree with agapewolf…
 
That’s probably the issue for most people though. That they still love their deceased spouse and possibly feel guilty about marrying again.
I think one would never stop loving a decease spouse. However , if they decide to go into a relationship or marriage, this should be because they also love their 2nd spouse and they should do what they can to make that marriage work by not making any comparisons. There is a reason why God did not take their lives and that they are still alive on Earth and I believe that if indeed they want to move on, they should do it willingly and not put any burdens on other people’s lives. Life is not easy and sometimes we just have to go with the flow…
 
Yeah. I do too to a certain extent. But is it not a bit unreasonable to want them to take the ring off. Maybe they get some comfort from it?
You can never force anything on anybody…but I think it would also be hard for the woman if he decides on his own free will to enter into a new relationship. It is a hard situation.
 
Yeah. I do too to a certain extent. But is it not a bit unreasonable to want them to take the ring off. Maybe they get some comfort from it?
It is in no way unreasonable for a woman to expect a man to take his WEDDING RING TO ANOTHER WOMAN off before dating her. It should be long gone before hand.

If he is getting comfort from it, he is not ready to be pursuing other relationships. If he takes years, fine. But don’t bring someone else into that mess. And it IS a mess if he involves another woman.
 
It is in no way unreasonable for a woman to expect a man to take his WEDDING RING TO ANOTHER WOMAN off before dating her.** It should be long gone before hand.
**
If he is getting comfort from it, he is not ready to be pursuing other relationships. If he takes years, fine. But don’t bring someone else into that mess. And it IS a mess if he involves another woman.
Yes…because it’s that easy to just forget a person you may have been married to for years.
 
I hope the “late” mrs “usher” doesn’t stumble upon this thread…
 
Yes…because it’s that easy to just forget a person you may have been married to for years.
So, should women even consider widowers? or should they just be alone for the rest of their lives…It isn’t also fair for the woman to be with a man who does not love her. (what if widower was very young?)
 
Yes…because it’s that easy to just forget a person you may have been married to for years.
This has nothing to do with what I said.
No one said anything about “forgetting” someone.

This has to do with entering into a relationship with someone new. Shouldn’t do it until they are ready.
 
This has nothing to do with what I said.
No one said anything about “forgetting” someone.

This has to do with entering into a relationship with someone new. Shouldn’t do it until they are ready.
Yeah, but it seems that “ready” seems to consist of being able to “move on” from your previous spouse. I doubt that it’s as easy as you say.

Perhaps some people shouldn’t remarry. Or perhaps a widower might be better marrying a widow. I don’t know. But it would seem unreasonable to want a formerly married person to take off their wedding ring if it is a comfort to them.
 
Yeah, but it seems that “ready” seems to consist of being able to “move on” from your previous spouse. I doubt that it’s as easy as you say.

Perhaps some people shouldn’t remarry. Or perhaps a widower might be better marrying a widow. I don’t know. But it would seem unreasonable to want a formerly married person to take off their wedding ring if it is a comfort to them.
Nowhere did I say it was easy. If you want to have an intelligent conversation you can’t be making things up here.

If the wedding ring is a comfort to them and they don’t want to take it off, they should NOT be in a relationship with someone new. Women shoulnt date married men. A wedding ring says someone is married.
 
Nowhere did I say it was easy. If you want to have an intelligent conversation you can’t be making things up here.

If the wedding ring is a comfort to them and they don’t want to take it off, they should NOT be in a relationship with someone new. Women shoulnt date married men. A wedding ring says someone is married.
If the spouse is dead then they’re not married anymore. Regardless of ring. Perhaps if you’re dating a widow/er one should realise that they will have treasured memories of the first spouse and nothing is going to change that. So either deal with it or find someone else.
 
If the spouse is dead then they’re not married anymore. Regardless of ring. Perhaps if you’re dating a widow/er one should realise that they will have treasured memories of the first spouse and nothing is going to change that. So either deal with it or find someone else.
Again, stop making stuff up. One doesn’t have anything to do with the other.

Death means the marriage has ended; therefore he shouldn’t wear a symbol of the marriage if he is pursuing someone else for marriage. This has nothing to do with treasured memories.
The inability of someone to take off their wedding ring is the biggest telltale sign of not ready.
This is discussed a lot in a book by a widower. M
 
Yeah… I mean even if he is a widower and he is still wearing a ring…that means he is still emotionally married and should not be dating at all… I don’t know…I am just guessing…I dont know much about this stuff and I do not know anybody who is a widower either…so…🤷
 
Again, stop making stuff up. One doesn’t have anything to do with the other.

Death means the marriage has ended; therefore he shouldn’t wear a symbol of the marriage if he is pursuing someone else for marriage. This has nothing to do with treasured memories.
The inability of someone to take off their wedding ring is the biggest telltale sign of not ready.
This is discussed a lot in a book by a widower. M
Agreed. To leave a wedding ring on means one is not ready emotionally even if one thinks or acts like he is available. It seems a fairly good sign of as yet unintegrated conflicts to “date” and wear at the same time. It might seem strange that any straight thinking male could attempt to do both…yet sometimes the loneliness fighting the undead past bond arrests straight thinking :o. I speak from complicated past experience. It took a while to take my ring off at 34.
 
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