Alcohol at church functions - ok or not?

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dprewett said:
This is a great point my father has been dry for over a year and does not always withdrawl himself just because alcohal is around. He may leave early or go read a book but does not blame others for letting drinking rule his own life for years.
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I’ll say a prayer that your dad stays dry, my friend.
 
Corki said:
Thankfully, I have never belonged to a parish that did away with incense but that’s not a very fair comparison. Incense is part of the Mass and used in the Church itself. People need to be at Mass. People don’t need to be at a campground get together.

And where would it end? Do we ban desserts at the Spaghetti dinner because there are diabetics there? Or maybe we need to ban Spaghetti dinners completely because some parishioners might be gluten intollerant? And anything billed as “all you can eat” would have to go because of the obese or overeaters in the parish.
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See Post #32 in this thread.

The Church should be charitable in all things.

The Church does not need to ban spaghetti dinners, but it would be charitable for them to offer a low-carb or carb-free alternative to diabetics and others who can’t tolerate high-carb fare. (E.g., chicken breast)

If the parish does not choose to offer this alternative, well, that’s the way it goes. There are plenty of places for a diabetic to eat low-carb food.

Keep in mind that this isn’t a small portion of the population. Diabetes is epidemic right now in the U.S. 50%–HALF!–of African Americans have diabetes, and a huge percentage of the Hispanic Americans and Euro-Americans have either diabetes or metabolic syndrome (pre-diabetes). Even young children and teenagers are being diagnosed with Type II Diabetes!

So here in the U.S., we’re rapidly getting to a place where perhaps it would be best for parishes to cancel their spaghetti suppers and offer Chicken (not fried!) and Vege (not fried) suppers instead!

BTW, beer is high in carbs, too.
 
Cat said:
Keep in mind that this isn’t a small portion of the population. Diabetes is epidemic right now in the U.S. 50%–HALF!–of African Americans have diabetes, and a huge percentage of the Hispanic Americans and Euro-Americans have either diabetes or metabolic syndrome (pre-diabetes). Even young children and teenagers are being diagnosed with Type II Diabetes!

So here in the U.S., we’re rapidly getting to a place where perhaps it would be best for parishes to cancel their spaghetti suppers and offer Chicken (not fried!) and Vege (not fried) suppers instead!
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But the original post was about two folks who showed up to a campground and ended up spending the weekend in a tent because there was alcohol around and they didn’t know that before hand. Nothing about food or nutrition was mentioned.

Accomplishments, especially those hard won, can lead people to have the zealousness of new converts. “I’ve been dry for six years, so anybody can stop drinking if they just work the program!” “Well, I worked two jobs to put myself through school; I don’t understand why she says she can’t do it.” “My wife and I are raising nine kids on my income. There’s no reason why his wife needs to work.” “I smoked two packs a day for 20 years, and I quit. Why can’t you?”

The reality is that while we should feel proud of our accomplishments, we should have no expectation that everyone can, or even wants to, follow in our footsteps. To have such an expectation is a great way to alienate friends and lose influence over people.

Statistics and reputable health information on just about everything related to body weight and size is all over the place, with one extreme putting pictures of headless overweight people eating ice cream in news stories that want us to believe half of America is going to die tomorrow if we all don’t get off our obese butts lose weight right this minute. And the other end of the spectrum wants us to to think that there is absolutely no connection between how much (or how little) one weighs and the overall state of one’s health.

The truth is probably somewhere in between.

But the bottom line is that church functions aren’t fat camps, and nor are they AA meetings (except when AA meets are held at church, of course). And we are, after all, adults (and because none of us has the right at a church function to tell other parishioners’ children what they can or can’t eat, we’re not even going to go there), with enough cognitive abilities and body awareness to decide for ourselves if we want a plate of spaghetti, a slice of apple pie, a salad, or a glass of wine. None of us needs the food police to make that decision for us.

And even if priests took it as their moral obligation to shepard their flocks to sobriety or some “ideal” body size, how would that look? What would be posted in the weekly bulletin:

The Knights of Columbus fish dinner is this Friday. All-you-can-eat, unless we think you need to lose weight, in which case you can have one plate.

Alcoholics, don’t forget to wear your black armbands to the crabfest so our volunteers can refuse you beer and wine.

Our Christmas Candy Fundraiser is limited this year to parishioners with less than a 32 inch waist.

*Mark your calendars for the Boca Burger BBQ Sunday after the 12:30 p.m. Mass! Gluten intolerant parishioners are welcome to BYOF (bring your own food). *

Hyperbolic, I know, but you can see where I’m going. We’re adults. We get to decide what and how much we ingest. We get to assume responsibility for what we put in our bodies. We’re not kids who have to be shown. We’re adults, and we get to act like it.
 
I think we should expect that there would be a balance of parish activities as well. If a parishioner could not find any social or study group that did not involve alcohol, that would point to an imbalance of use in the wider parish that needed to be addressed. Some events are ok with alcohol availablel, while maybe it isn’t the best choice at the Bible Study, or the Sunday School picnic.
 
karow said:
I can see it now: Scripture and Scotch, Tuesdays from 7:30-9:00 p.m.:rotfl:
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Hmmm. It could prove to be quite popular. You could have unit studies, like Mark and Merlot, or Luke and a lambic.
 
nickybr38 said:
And your response is completely in line with what St. Paul says in Scripture. 🙂 👍
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Then all parish activities that involve food should be eliminated. There are many people with eating disorders and food addiction that will find food served to be a stumbling block, it would be much better to just avoid the possibility by cancelling all food related activities. Why should eating disorders or addictions be given less concern than alcoholism, just because the injury to the person takes longer to show up?

Karow made my point much better than I did.

On a side note, on a busy Friday night as a cocktail waitress there would always be a steady count of 15 to 20 people who… weren’t drinking. Designated drivers, people who don’t like the taste, don’t like the way they react to alcohol, believe they shouldn’t, or just don’t feel like it that particular evening. If there are that many non-drinkers in a bar on a busy Friday night I find it hard to believe that in a weekend church outing there were only people who didn’t drink.
 
JonNC said:
Is the same true if someone overweight? Should we then not serve food at a parish function, so as not to tempt someone into gluttony?

Jon
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Based on the percent of overweight people that wouldn’t be a bad idea.😉
 
My mentality is that I won’t do anything to make my brother stumble. If I am aware that a particular activity could cause him problems, I won’t partake.

I do this as an individual because my function is to love those around me, not seek my own pleasure.

That said… I’m not sure how this would translate in a group setting. In a group do the needs of the majority outweigh the weakness of the one?

Furthermore, I would just like to point out that comparing alcohol to food is not a fair comparison. Eating too much cake isn’t going to make you act like a fool, nor will it cause you to loosen your self control. 🤷

I’ve said it many times now but I do believe that any church function that is going to feature alcohol should be clear on that fact so those who are weaker know to avoid the event.

As an update, my lady friend (from the OP) is now considering leaving her church because this upset her so much. Yes, her faith is weak. Yes, her knowledge is shaky… but before these people could teach her better they’ve scandalized her so much she’s thinking of leaving. What a sad, sad, situation. These people, the ones who are weak in their faith, are the ones we’re here for. They are the ones we’re supposed to take care of. 😦 Oh well, maybe I can convince her to join me at the Catholic Church now (don’t worry, I’m trying to counsel her towards staying at her church and working with her pastor to get some clarification). 🙂
 
nickybr38 said:
Furthermore, I would just like to point out that comparing alcohol to food is not a fair comparison. Eating too much cake isn’t going to make you act like a fool, nor will it cause you to loosen your self control. 🤷
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No it’s not because an alcoholic can avoid alcohol, a food addict still has to eat, and face people who really just don’t think it’s a big deal.
 
nickybr38 said:
… but before these people could teach her better they’ve scandalized her so much she’s thinking of leaving.
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Can you clear up or define your usage of the term “scandalized” for me. Thank you:).

Peace, Graubo
 
nickybr38 said:
That was my understanding of what the Catholic church teaches. 🙂 From what I understand her church teaches that alcohol is sinful period.
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Ever heard the one about “wine” being merely grape juice in the Bible? I suppose that’s what Noah and Lot passed out from… that grape juice sure had a strange effect!
 
Graubo3 said:
Can you clear up or define your usage of the term “scandalized” for me. Thank you:).

Peace, Graubo
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Ah, sorry. Did I use the word wrong? Um, basically, she is very offended by what went on. Perhaps I should have used that word instead. 🙂

*Ever heard the one about “wine” being merely grape juice in the Bible? I suppose that’s what Noah and Lot passed out from… that grape juice sure had a strange effect! *

I HAVE heard that one. It makes me laugh every time. Heh. Well, they’re not completely off. Have you ever had old grape juice? I don’t know if it’d make me drunk but it might make me pretty sick! Haha.

*No it’s not because an alcoholic can avoid alcohol, a food addict still has to eat, and face people who really just don’t think it’s a big deal. *

Are we comparing sickness now? To see whose is worse?
 
Cat said:
Bless your pastor! He gets it. Souls will be saved, marriages will be strengthened, and families will remain intact because of his wise and courageous action. Also, Protestants will be converted.

I want to go to your parish!
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We don’t serve alcohol at church pot luck dinners or breakfast. Coffee, tea and cold water or soda.
 
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