Am I a cafeteria Catholic?

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Benjinho

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New Roman Catholic here, just got confirmed this past Easter.

I felt drawn to the church despite being raised in a house that by and large lacked religion because not only is my fiancee Catholic, my mom was raised Catholic as well (though she is non-practicing).

Overall, it feels great to be part of a community and of something greater than myself, and I love the church’s emphasis on family because I’ve dreamt of a big family for a huge part of my life.

The thing is…I can’t bring myself to agreeing 100% with everything the church teaches. I understand that homosexuality, fornication, masturbation, medical birth control, and pornography all detract from sexual urges being used to create families.

But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL. Misguided or confused, yes. But evil to me means a malicious attack or deep desire to harm. Even those actions could be considered misguided.

Am I a cafeteria Catholic because I don’t have a super socially conservative mindset/have my own mind about some of these teachings? Even worse, does this make me guilty of heresy (the mortal sin where someone rejects any church teaching)?
 
If you are not going to accept ALL the teachings of the Catholic Church, then you are committing a mortal sin. If you have INVOLUNTARY DOUBT, even if it is doubt towards a crucial doctrine, then that is not a sin as long as you profess belief in it and try your best to believe in best, ensuring that you intertwine all the doctrines of the Church into your life. Essentially, doubt is not a sin unless you choose to give in to the temptation to renounce belief. If, for example, you doubt the real presence of Christ in the Eucharist, you are not sinning unless your doubt leads you to say that you don’t believe in it. Anything you doubt, it is not your fault, but you must continue to profess belief and do everything to try and believe.

If you deliberately and with full consent reject a doctrine, you are sinning. Your must accept all doctrines.

God Bless.
 
But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL.
The Catholic Church does not call people who do these things evil either. I cannot think of one person the Catholic Church calls evil, including Judas.

We hate the sin but love the sinner.
Pope Francis says the Catholic Church is a field hospital for sinners.
You are right not to call anyone evil.
 
The Church does not call such people evil. No one is evil. The actions are evil, but not the people who commit them.

Hate the sin, love the sinner!The Church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum of saints.
 
I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL.
We are all sinners. We should hate the sin, not the sinner. The Church DOES NOT teach that the people who commit these acts are evil, but it does teach us that the acts can be.
 
There’s a technical answer for your question, and I’m sure somebody will give you the definition of heresy.

The items you mention are discussed in the Catechism of the Catholic Church. That is the best place to start studying in the privacy of your own home. We should find ourselves agreeing with the Church teaching , sacred tradition, and the Bible. When somebody enters the Church they may be shocked at something or other. That’s OK as long as it puts us on the road to developing our conscience in accordance with the truth. Our Lord said repent and believe. That’s important. We ALL must surrender our wills to God (…thy will be done on Earth as it is in heaven…") Our goal is holiness.

As far as judging others as evil, well, generally we should use our faith to help guide others to the truth for the sake of their salvation.

If you’re picking and choosing what you will accept and what not to accept, you may be in that fast food line in the cafeteria.
 
As a new Catholic (welcome home!), it is incumbent upon you to:
  1. At a minimum grant intellectual assent to the teachings of the Church.
  2. Get a catechism and read the applicable sections as questions arise.
  3. Know both the teachings and the reasons for those teachings - it will all make sense at that point.
Now, the catechism is a book that is packed very densely with information and reasoning. Consider a Compendium of the Catechism, a Pocket Catechism or even a copy of Catholicism for Dummies by Frs. John Trigilio and Kenneth Brighenti.
 
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You have been given true answers and good advice.
However, please do not fear, due to a mention in a post, that you may be mortally sinful for struggling with a mistaken belief, that out of compassion and respect, you wish answered .
It seems that you do in fact accept the teachings of the Church, so no, you’re not a cafeteria Catholic.

Whoever told you that these people are evil is not correctly reflecting the Church.
Catholics know that all of us are sinners to a larger or greater degree. In that, we are sinful, not evil.
 
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All people are children of God. Some people commit so much evil, and such horrendous evil, that they are described as being evil, which, if we ignore or lose sight of the first sentence can lead us down the wrong path.

The people the OP references generally are not those most would categorize as evil; but people like Jeffrey Dahmer, Nikolas Cruz, and a host of others have been widely referred to as evil people.

Yes, they too are children of God; but it takes a special person to see past the absolutely horrific crimes they have committed to see that. Most of us never get that close to the truly horrific crimes and the people who commit them, and is it easy to sit in one’s armchair and comment about them. It is entirely a different matter to come in contact with them and their acts.
 
But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL.
And you’re correct.
The Church doesn’t label people evil (which would be judging).
She labels actions.

Welcome to the Church, BTW 🙂
And I’ll remember you in my prayers as you walk on your spiritual journey :pray:t2:❤️
 
But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL. Misguided or confused, yes. But evil to me means a malicious attack or deep desire to harm. Even those actions could be considered misguided.
The Church does not teach that you have to call people “evil.” We are all sinners.
 
If you are not going to accept ALL the teachings of the Catholic Church, then you are committing a mortal sin.
Did you read the post, or only the title and then make assumptions? The OP’s question is about calling people evil. Which the Church does not require of us.
 
The thing is…I can’t bring myself to agreeing 100% with everything the church teaches. I understand that homosexuality, fornication, masturbation, medical birth control, and pornography all detract from sexual urges being used to create families.

But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL. Misguided or confused, yes. But evil to me means a malicious attack or deep desire to harm. Even those actions could be considered misguided.
The people who commit these acts aren’t evil. The actions themselves are evil.

Love and pray for the sinner. Hate the sin.
 
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Am I a cafeteria Catholic because I don’t have a super socially conservative mindset/have my own mind about some of these teachings? Even worse, does this make me guilty of heresy (the mortal sin where someone rejects any church teaching)?
The vast majority of Catholics struggle, or disagree, with some aspects of the faith. Some have the issues you describe with things society would call “conservative”, while others disagree with the Church’s teachings that are considered “liberal” such as the teachings on the universal destination of goods, the death penalty and other social issues.

What you should do is talk to a priest or other real life spiritual advisor. Do not rely on the advice of anonymous posters on the internet, including me.
 
The Church speaks for Christ here on earth, remember what Christ said to the Apostles, “He who hears you hears me…”

There are many cafeteria Catholics, and usually they see the Church as some outdated restricting earthly institution rather than what it is, the Body of Christ. Our Lord tells us that HE is the way, the truth, and the life. He also says to St. Paul when he was persecuting the Church, "Why are you persecuting ME. To disagree with the Churches teachings is indeed disagreeing with Christ, and there is only one culprit … Pride.

Imagine a church full of cafeteria Catholics, each one having something they disagree about with the Church. Bob says “I” don’t believe homosexuality is a sin. Sue says “I” don’t believe birth control is a sin. Ted says “I” believe there should be divorces. Martha says “I” think abortions should be allowed. Luther says “I” don’t believe in confessing my sins to a priest. John says “I” believe Blessed Mary sinned. And on and on for the remainder of the cafeteria Catholics filling the pews, each one having their own “I” know more than the Church reasons.

If the Church adopted each of their “I” opinions as official Church teachings… What would the Church look like? Would it be Christ’s Church, or would it be the Church of Bob Sue Martha Luther John???

We can either see the Church as THE Divine institution and living Body of Christ, teaching faith and morals infallibly, or the only other option is that it is a fallible human institution of men guessing at every doctrine of faith and leaving morals up to the parishoners. We already know the results of the “I” syndrome with Bible interpretations, the results speak louder than any word I can say … thousands of denominations!

I once was a cafeteria Catholic too. Thank God I now see clearly WHO the Church is and WHO the Church speaks for. He who has ears should listen, and if today you hear His voice harden not your hearts. His voice is heard via the Church!

Amen.
 
But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL. Misguided or confused, yes. But evil to me means a malicious attack or deep desire to harm. Even those actions could be considered misguided.
We should never call anyone evil. Judging someone’s soul is for God alone. We can say that the action is good or bad, but we don’t judge how culpable or not they are.

As an aside, I think it’s good that you’re not falling into the trap of getting too preoccupied with sexual sins/culture war stuff. While it’s important to recognize sin as sin, it’s also good to remember there is more to virtue than sexual purity. Again, sexual purity is important, but sometimes people get completely focused on that and forget everything else.
 
The Church is complicated. It took us over 2,000 years to get to where we are today.
Ultimately, we are here to give praise and glory to God in all of our actions.
And we are here to love and serve our brothers and sisters in Christ Jesus.
You need not call other people evil. Pray for them and go about your business.
 
The thing is…I can’t bring myself to agreeing 100% with everything the church teaches.
Before I comment on that let me first comment on this: “If you are not going to accept ALL the teachings of the Catholic Church, then you are committing a mortal sin.”

This is not accurate. There are dogmas that must be accepted, but there are in fact different levels of assent required for different levels of teachings.

891 … When the Church through its supreme Magisterium proposes a doctrine “for belief as being divinely revealed,” and as the teaching of Christ, the definitions "must be adhered to with the obedience of faith.
892 …To this ordinary teaching the faithful “are to adhere to it with religious assent”

As to your question, you have to ask yourself why you believe what the church says on one thing but disbelieve what she says on another. Either the church is what she claims to be, or she isn’t. If she is in fact the church Christ created then what she teaches are not her own inventions, not simply the collective opinions of a group of guys who voted on what they thought should be taught.

On the other hand, if her claims about herself are not true then what sense does it make to believe anything she says? If she is wrong about her central claim then everything else she says is suspect as well. Cafeteria Catholicism is (to me) simply irrational. If one rejects what the church claims to be then it seems senseless to believe anything she says, but if she is in fact what she claims to be then “her” dogmas are nothing less than God’s laws.

“The knowledge which the Church offers to man has its origin not in any speculation of her own, however sublime but in the word of God which she has received in faith.” (Fides et ratio #7)

Accept this or reject it, but accept the implications of that decision.
 
But…I can’t bring myself to call people who do these things EVIL. Misguided or confused, yes. But evil to me means a malicious attack or deep desire to harm. Even those actions could be considered misguided.
Who calls such people EVIL?? Certainly the Church does not and neither should individual Catholics.
Where did you get this notion from?
 
A Evil person is one who commits evils acts and sin is evil,

What part am I missing !
 
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