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I do not advocate the “killing of innocent children”. I advocate for a woman’s legal right to choose whether or not to continue with or terminate a pregnancy. Furthermore, I advocate for her right and responsibility to choose according to her own religion, her own moral code, her own conscience, and not** mine and not yours. And you are delusional if you believe rendering abortion illegal will cause “all of the violence to go away”. Coercion will escalate, beatings will escalate, rage will escalate, women will investigate all means of illicit abortion. If you have never been in this situation it’s easy for you to be an armchair critic. You cannot appreciate the secret violence if it has not been visited upon you.
Abortion is violent. Abortion is not without risk. Abortion is a pathetic ending to life, to possibilities, to dreams. It closes the casket on relationships, on what we think we know as love, on the potential for a fetus to come into this world and grow and thrive. I do not deny any of it. Although there are incredibly heart-wrenching cases where a fetus has no hope of life, the everyday demand for abortion is directly proportional to the ignorance and selfishness of men and women all over this country. I don’t deny that, either.
But I am not in a position to judge another woman’s situation or to try to persuade her to act against her own moral code. If she asks my opinion I will share my experience, strength and hope with her, because we share a common situation in that I aborted a 13-week-old fetus in June of 1971. I will share with her that I have learned not to repeat the experience, how it shaped my relationship with men, with God, with my daughter, with other women who have asked me about my abortion. I will not vomit this information all over her so that she may sort it out in times of trial and anxiety and fear and dread and worry and confusion. I will not intervene, I will not judge a woman’s situation or decision that comes from that situation. Nor will not advocate for abortion. I will advocate for her to consult whatever Higher Power she may have and decide for herself, with this Guidance, which way to go.
Intervention, coercion, persuasion, manipulation are all inappropriate. I will not participate on any of those levels in another woman’s pregnancy. If you choose to do so, that is your prerogative. But I stand behind free will as a gift from God. Sometimes we don’t use it wisely. No one is immune from foolishness or selfishness. But people should be free to make life decisions without hindrance from others. Anyone is free to disagree with this, as I’m certain most of you will. It does not change my position.
The main life decision in this case is not the one that relieves the pregnant woman or that saves the fetus. It is the one that led the woman into having intercourse in the first place. That’s where to start: the pre-pregnancy, pre-sexually-active place. The place where we are not afraid to give our children - our pre-adolescent children - the facts about their upcoming sexuality - beyond abstinence. They are entitled to the whole package, not just “don’t do it and God will be happy.”
Limerick