Are people dressing immodestly during Mass?

[atassina]

Are you having a problem with people dressing immodestly during Mass and any other liturgical services? I have seen teenage girls come to church in a dress that my mother used to call a nightie. Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.
What have you seen and experienced?

 

[danonwaveland]

I have been guilty of dressing improperly – jeans and a shirt that should have been dressier. However, immodest dress is more common, I think. OTOH, it is not new; case in point: 26 years ago, we attended a Saturday anticipated mass and one of the Eucharistic Ministers – who processed up the aisle with the priest and servers at the beginning of the mass – was wearing a very tight black leather pant suit with black high heels. Considering that she was part of the liturgical celebration, I was pretty surprised. On one hand, she was probably a better Catholic than me. On the other hand, no one should wear that kind of outfit to mass.

God bless,
Dan

 

[BSHoop96]

Are you having a problem with people dressing immodestly during Mass and any other liturgical services? I have seen teenage girls come to church in a dress that my mother used to call a nightie. Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.
What have you seen and experienced?

Yes, they are. Mostly teenage girls. But then again…they are dressing immodestly everyone. It never ceases to amaze me.

 

[moen]

I have been guilty of dressing improperly – jeans and a shirt that should have been dressier. However, immodest dress is more common, I think. OTOH, it is not new; case in point: 26 years ago, we attended a Saturday anticipated mass and one of the Eucharistic Ministers – who processed up the aisle with the priest and servers at the beginning of the mass – was wearing a very tight black leather pant suit with black high heels. Considering that she was part of the liturgical celebration, I was pretty surprised. On one hand, she was probably a better Catholic than me. On the other hand, no one should wear that kind of outfit to mass.

God bless,
Dan

Across the board I am surprised at the styles I see daily worn by women…especially the fairly new thing of having unbelievable plunging necklines. I am not young nor that old (in my ahem, 40s)…but what is really hard to take is seeing it in church. What is happening here?
I saw a woman today in a store where literally she was “falling out” of her shirt. I almost knee-jerked said “Watch out, you’re falling out”------I caught myself, but then thought it might have been good for her to hear that! I almost feel like launching a campaign for us women who want to “stay intact” in our shirt by wearing REALLY modest clothes as a “protest!!”
Any takers???
ps----I do take a small issue with the term “good Catholic”-------does that mean in your/her heart or by outward actions? I’ve always been troubled by that phrase, since I am a convert, very happily, and have known many “good Catholics” on the outside who seemed to not love God inwardly much at all, but merely were simply “doing the Catholic thing” really well on the outside. I hope my radical conversion will spark some flames in my sphere of influence…

Let’s all band together as females and be radically modest

 

[atassina]

I have been guilty of dressing improperly – jeans and a shirt that should have been dressier. However, immodest dress is more common, I think. OTOH, it is not new; case in point: 26 years ago, we attended a Saturday anticipated mass and one of the Eucharistic Ministers – who processed up the aisle with the priest and servers at the beginning of the mass – was wearing a very tight black leather pant suit with black high heels. Considering that she was part of the liturgical celebration, I was pretty surprised. On one hand, she was probably a better Catholic than me. On the other hand, no one should wear that kind of outfit to mass.

God bless,
Dan

Dan: There is a distinction between dressing casually and dressing immodestly. The focus and center of this thread is dressing immodestly. Skin tight clothing reveals what should remain hidden. More on this later

 

[Jamison97]

I am a devout Catholic and this subject has been one of the few things I have found wrong with the Holy Mother Church. Didn’t Jesus preach simplicity? Then why do we get all dressy to worship at Holy Mass?

 

[atassina]

Across the board I am surprised at the styles I see daily worn by women…especially the fairly new thing of having unbelievable plunging necklines. I am not young nor that old (in my ahem, 40s)…but what is really hard to take is seeing it in church. What is happening here?
I saw a woman today in a store where literally she was “falling out” of her shirt. I almost knee-jerked said “Watch out, you’re falling out”------I caught myself, but then thought it might have been good for her to hear that! I almost feel like launching a campaign for us women who want to “stay intact” in our shirt by wearing REALLY modest clothes as a “protest!!”
Any takers???
ps----I do take a small issue with the term “good Catholic”-------does that mean in your/her heart or by outward actions? I’ve always been troubled by that phrase, since I am a convert, very happily, and have known many “good Catholics” on the outside who seemed to not love God inwardly much at all, but merely were simply “doing the Catholic thing” really well on the outside. I hope my radical conversion will spark some flames in my sphere of influence…

Let’s all band together as females and be radically modest

moen: Both women and men in my church are disgusted with the immodest dressing of many women. More on this later

 

[surfgirlusa_200]

Are you having a problem with people dressing immodestly during Mass and any other liturgical services? I have seen teenage girls come to church in a dress that my mother used to call a nightie. Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.
What have you seen and experienced?

I attended Mass in the cathedral this past week, and I was surprised to see two teenaged girls wearing extremely short shorts, and what looked like swimsuits under their t-shirts.

I will admit that I am guilty of wearing tops with low cut necklines; it’s been hard for me to find dressy tops that aren’t low cut. I don’t have much of anything that could fall out, fortunately.

 

[Malkin71]

Are you having a problem with people dressing immodestly during Mass and any other liturgical services? I have seen teenage girls come to church in a dress that my mother used to call a nightie. Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.
What have you seen and experienced?

Yes, I have seen people dress poorly for Mass. What is even more strange is I have seen it on Christmas and Easter too! Jeans, T shirts, shorts, tennis shoes, tank tops, sports jersey’s etc… I have a confession to admit. For a time I too dressed the same except tank tops. Now, when I attend Mass I dress in a button down shirt and dress slacks.

A Priest mention in his homily that when you come into Mass you do not wear Jeans, T shirts, shorts, tennis shoes, tank tops, sweatshirts. You are not doing it for me, you are not doing it for the person sitting next to you, your are doing it for "Him’. He points to the Tabernacle. Also he mentioned that dress clothes are less cheeper than jeans tennis shoes etc… Department stores such as Khol’s, Jc Penney, Macy’s has sales that you can buy them during off season and save money. Also Sam’s club and Costco, WalMart has dress clothes for a good price. Believe it or not I know a lot of people who find Excellent clothes from Goodwill.

What I am saying is there is ZERO EXCUSE FOR SOMEONE WHO GOES TO MASS AND CAN NOT WEAR DRESS CLOTHES. If they do not have transportation. Then ask someone a friend or relative to take them. If people can dish out $100.00 for a pair of tennis shoes for that amount, I can buy a dress button down shirt, one pair of dress slacks and a pair of casual shoes. Even if you wear it to Mass ever week. It is better than going to Mass dressed poorly.

The answer that I usually get from people when I ask about how to dress for Mass is “Where does it say that I should dress up for Mass? It is a man made rule.”. That is the usual reply?

 

[BernadetteM]

At my parish there is a sign in front of the doors that explain what is acceptable to wear. There are also examples (pictures) of how you are to dress. The length of a dress, no shorts etc.

There are a few people who come in jeans, but not many. Many of the women cover their heads. Everyone is very reverent. You see all the children 2 years and up genuflecting before entering the pew. Even the teenagers usually wear modest clothes and the boys pants and shirts. There are many men who where suits.

Also it is a NO parish it is very traditional. They also have a latin mass on Sundays and confession almost every day and also on Sunday.

Yours in the Hearts of Jesus and Mary

Bernadette

 

[Flannery]

I am a devout Catholic and this subject has been one of the few things I have found wrong with the Holy Mother Church. Didn’t Jesus preach simplicity? Then why do we get all dressy to worship at Holy Mass?

No one is talking about getting “all dressy”. Rather the concern is a bare (pardon the pun) minimum standard of modesty, neatness and simple decorum. No one says you need to put on a 3-piece suit, silk tie and designer shoes. Least of all has that ever been said, as you state, by “Holy Mother Church”. There is no dress code in the Catechism. I feel it comes down to this: if you are dressed appropriately, you will not distract fellow parishioners. No one’s eyes should ever leave the altar. But if the woman in the pew before you has skin tight jeans and her midriff showing, it’s distracting. The opposite extreme could be true, to wear a gorgeous silk dress, high heels and color-coordinated handbag and hat, with dangling sparkly earrings is too dressed up. Sloppy, immodest are wrong, but then again so is the “Easter Parade” of “see how fancy I am.”

 

[GratefulDad]

Are you having a problem with people dressing immodestly during Mass and any other liturgical services? I have seen teenage girls come to church in a dress that my mother used to call a nightie. Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.
What have you seen and experienced?

Ditto.

 

[turtle18]

I am female and I mean this in all charity—there are so many women at Church who wear tight pants with shirts cut off at the waist and it really ends up showing off their behind. Now I know it is not intentional, and the women never give a second thought to it. But we had a lector wearing something like that and when she came up to the altar, bowed to it, highlighting her rear end to the whole Church. I can only imagine what a lot of the men were thinking.

Sometimes I just keep my eyes shut during Mass to drown out all the distractions.

 

[danonwaveland]

I do take a small issue with the term “good Catholic”-------does that mean in your/her heart or by outward actions? I’ve always been troubled by that phrase, since I am a convert, very happily, and have known many “good Catholics” on the outside who seemed to not love God inwardly much at all, but merely were simply “doing the Catholic thing” really well on the outside. I hope my radical conversion will spark some flames in my sphere of influence…

I agree with your point and that is why I made my comment. I can just barely imagine that this EM in the tight leather was oblivious to the way she was dressed. However, I suppose it’s possible. That’s why I said that she may have been a better Catholic than me. And what “better” or “good” Catholic means is only appropriate as we evaluate ourselves – I should have chosen a better phrase, I guess, when I wrote my original reply.

But, yeah, I hope your witness lights a fire under a lot of us cradle Catholics – we sure need it (again, a generalization, so I’d better watch it). The fact that we are discussing immodest dress in church is proof that a lot of us Catholics have no clue what is going on at mass – and we will never truly appreciate it 'til we reach, hopefully, heaven. Mass is where the Creator of the universe, who gave up His life for us and saved and sustains us gives us His own Body and Blood to strengthen, revitalize and sanctify us and we’re dressed like we just stumbled out of bed (I plead guilty to this occaisionally, myself). So, yeah, we don’t know just what a gift we have. Our Creator is head-over-heels, crazy, totally, truly in love with us. Shouldn’t we reciprocate?

And by the way, welcome home! Thanks for swimming the Tiber!

God bless,
Dan

 

[soblessed]

A couple of years ago, a young woman (around 18 or so) came to Mass in a swimsuit and flip flops. Honestly. Just the swimsuit. No shirt, no shorts. And she was right there in line ahead of us to partake of the Eucharist.

It wasn’t our usual Mass, but ever since then when I remember it, I wonder if I should have said something…I mean, SOMEONE really should have said something, kwim? Oh well, if I had said something, not knowing her and not being a part of the regular congregation, it probably just would have made her defensive and the point would have been lost, anyway. Still…

 

[mystified]

Not during Mass, but certainly there are those who are not dressing modestly before attending Mass.

Guess I’m showing my age, but I can recall that girls were encouraged to dress Marylike for attending Mass, and for the most part it does seem that some of our girls and women are wearing things the just threw on, and almost missed. This not to say that men and boys are not wearing T-shirts with pictures and wording of questionable taste, whether in Church or elsewhere.

In warmer and more humid climates, shorts may be in order, if they aren’t too short or tight. I know of a Deacon who sometimes wears kneelength shorts and stockings under his alb and dalmatic during the warmer seasons. Shorts worn under a skirt that may have “gotten shorter” on a growing girl would also not be offensive.

As a soldier, I devoted my spare time to serving as a Scoutmaster for military dependents. On one Sunday, prior to boarding a bus for a week at camp, I attended Mass in a chapel where the priest pressed me into service as an altarboy wearing a full summer field uniform, short pants, short sleeves… There are shorts and there are shorts.

 

[workingmomof3]

I am trying to teach my children while they are young to dress respectfully at Mass. My girls must wear a dress or skirt, and my son must wear dress shoes and a shirt with a collar.

I have seen all kinds of things at church, and it makes me sad. People will spend hours trying on clothes for a special occasion, but not think twice of what to wear to spend time with our Lord. This is what I tell my kids - If you were going to see a very imporant person, wouldn’t you wear your best? Isn’t God more imporant than anybody?

I don’t have a large wardobe, and most of the time I wear the same things over and over, but I don’t dress immodestly and I will not allow my children to either. I hope by teaching them now, I won’t have to fight too hard when they are teenagers…

 

[AHapka]

Men and women wearing shorts in church is also immodest-- I think.

I normally wear a suit and tie to Mass.

In the summer, I have been known to wear shorts. Our church is in Wisconsin. 50 weeks out of the year it doesn’t matter. 2 weeks out of the year it’ll have been in the 90’s or 100’s for a few days and the church is very, very hot inside (no A/C). I don’t think wearing shorts is immodest because a person could easily get overheated then (I do wear a collered shirt with them).

In the winter, I have worn sorels with my suit. Aside from the squisy/squeaky noise they make for a little bit with each step you take inside, I have no problem with this. We can easily have a few inches of snow in the parking lot to walk through. No way I’m walking through that in dress shoes.

One of my good protestant friends always put it this way: How would you dress if you were invited to the White House to meet the President? How do you dress for church to meet God? Makes one think…

 

[WetCatechumen]

…

Some of the things shock me. The swimsuit? Egads.

The first time I attended Mass I was told not to dress up because I’d be out of place. Most everyone there wore jeans and a polo. There were a few in suits and dresses, a few in skirts and slacks (like myself), but mostly jeans and polos.

Typically I wear a dress shirt and slacks - no tie. I don’t usually wear a jacket. I’m considering changing my policy. I don’t want to feel out of place, but out of respect for the Real Presence I feel very tempted to dress up. For all the Holy Week celebrations (Palm Sunday, Mass of the Last Supper, Good Friday, Easter Vigil, and Easter Sunday) I busted out the suit. Wore it a lot. It kind of gets old after a while, honestly. I don’t feel “sharp” in it when I’ve worn it a lot. But people still think I look sharp, so .

I do confess I’ve worn jeans and a t-shirt to Mass before - it’s a daily Mass at the Aquinas Newman Center I attend on Tuesday evenings. I feel bad for my dress but there’s no way for me to be dressed differently. Admittedly, the parish is borderline heretical (an extremely liberal parish, but better than many), but the priests and Masses are still valid.

But as for the women . . . I’ve been guilty more than once, of checking out a woman during Mass. It would be EASIER would girls not dress in manners which show off their bodies. The worst is tight fitting pants and skirts in women in the pews in front of me (or the best. . . ).

Ladies, have compassion, because while I would like to admire the form which God has given you, I also don’t want to receive knowing that I checked you out five minutes ago.

 

[Wampa]

I am a devout Catholic and this subject has been one of the few things I have found wrong with the Holy Mother Church. Didn’t Jesus preach simplicity? Then why do we get all dressy to worship at Holy Mass?

Many people have already answered this question with excellent responses and I agree with all of them. I’ll add one other point: in my person experience, I find that how a person dresses tends to be related to their belief in the actual presence of Jesus in the tabernacle. Those who don’t dress up tend to also show signs of ignorance of Jesus’ presence. Those who do dress up tend to acknowledge the presence of Jesus.

Count me as someone willing to show some respect for my Lord by dressing appropriately in his presence.

Note: in my mind, it’s always related to a person’s means. When I see a homeless person in church, it doesn’t bother me in the least how he’s dressed. When I go to the parish in the richest neighborhood in my city and see people who are clearly well-off dressed as if they are going to a bar, that’s when it’s disrespectful IMO.