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Sarcelle
Guest
That’s putting it nicely.
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RolandThompsonGunner
Guest
My grandparents didn’t get married until they were in their early 40s, and this was in the early 1950s when that was basically unheard of.
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RolandThompsonGunner
Guest
Where are you from? I’ve noticed that the average age at which people marry varies a ton from place to place. At least in the US, it’s not uncommon for people in smaller towns and the South/Midwest to get married in their early twenties.
In more urban areas, though, early 30s is quite common, if not the norm. I wasn’t married at 29, for what it’s worth.
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RolandThompsonGunner
Guest
Also, you’re female. Weird women just become fun kooky aunts. Weird guys start collecting swords and writing angry manifestos.
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Sarcelle
Guest
You know weird women were also suspected to be witches.Sarcelle:
Also, you’re female. Weird women just become fun kooky aunts. Weird guys start collecting swords and writing angry manifestos.
I probably would have been burned at the stake in the past.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
Me too. Especially with all the cats I have. Several of them black.You know weird women were also suspected to be witches.
I probably would have been burned at the stake in the past.
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Sarcelle
Guest
You’re way cooler than I.
Most cats don’t like me.
Except of course for the weird ones.
Had better luck with dogs.
Most cats don’t like me.
Except of course for the weird ones.
Had better luck with dogs.
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stpurl
Guest
A MALE viewpoint from 1890 to boot.
And considering how many women were single parents (due to the death of a spouse), were in service etc if unmarried and doing all sorts of work, often heavy work, and for very long hours, and in 1890 this would include female CHILDREN, the sentiments expressed by this person, who joined what, 9 days ago? Seem to me to be geared to troll. Isn’t this kind of post expressing a ‘view that never was’ that supposedly those crazy Catholics were all for? A kind of ‘traditional’ view that again, traditional Catholics (my grandfather had attended the seminary at the turn of the 20th century, for heaven’s sake, before discerning that his vocation was not to the priesthood, and yet this was never his view, or what he taught his well-educated and PROFESSIONAL daughters and granddaughters) supposedly thought?
A view that was pretty much based on a bunch of novels, books, and TV programs about a period in the US in the 1950s, and based again on an assumption of the British Victorian age in which the ideal of the leisured wife was confined to pretty much the ‘ton’, or the upper 10,000 men and women of ‘society’, and NOT for the 99% majority of middle and lower class?
And considering how many women were single parents (due to the death of a spouse), were in service etc if unmarried and doing all sorts of work, often heavy work, and for very long hours, and in 1890 this would include female CHILDREN, the sentiments expressed by this person, who joined what, 9 days ago? Seem to me to be geared to troll. Isn’t this kind of post expressing a ‘view that never was’ that supposedly those crazy Catholics were all for? A kind of ‘traditional’ view that again, traditional Catholics (my grandfather had attended the seminary at the turn of the 20th century, for heaven’s sake, before discerning that his vocation was not to the priesthood, and yet this was never his view, or what he taught his well-educated and PROFESSIONAL daughters and granddaughters) supposedly thought?
A view that was pretty much based on a bunch of novels, books, and TV programs about a period in the US in the 1950s, and based again on an assumption of the British Victorian age in which the ideal of the leisured wife was confined to pretty much the ‘ton’, or the upper 10,000 men and women of ‘society’, and NOT for the 99% majority of middle and lower class?
Tis_Bearself
Patron
Yes, it’s disturbing to me when users take names of saints or our Lord and then proceed to troll on here.
Then inevitably we get somebody else asking if this sort of claptrap is “how Catholics really think.”
Then inevitably we get somebody else asking if this sort of claptrap is “how Catholics really think.”
It’s only that way if you make it so. If you go around acting like you’re sooo sorry you didn’t get married that will do two things.
1 - Dates will be less interested because they’ll think that’s a bit weird.
2 - You’ll become a self-fulfilling prophesy.
I only married at 28. Many people don’t marry til they’re in their thirties. You’re still young.
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Anesti33
Guest
Some people have unresolved issues that make it impractical to form a lifelong relationship. It may be a diriment impediment to the marriage covenant or it may be something complex. I don’t know how you believe that “transportation and technology” are a silver bullet to forging a successful marriage, because they are merely superficial externals that can actually hinder the formation of bonds of friendship and Christian fellowship. Some of us get very good at sitting behind a computer and not coming out from behind the mask. Some of us get really good at jumping in the car after Mass and zipping around town without really meeting anyone along the way.
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Anesti33
Guest
As a man, I believe this comment is insulting to men and furthermore insulting to 1890.
Tis_Bearself
Patron
You’re assuming that just because people have access to a bigger dating pool, everybody who wants a long-term relationship should be able to find one. But some people simply aren’t good at relationships. Having a bigger pool, techology etc doesn’t necessarily help them develop the skills they need to couple up with someone else.
Many of the people who are “perpetually single” come off so poorly, even just online, that it’s pretty easy to see why they are not attracting a partner. It’s also often easy to see how people who do well at the first couple stages of meeting someone, dating them etc drop the ball when it’s time to level up to the next stage. Or else they are unrealistically picky about what they can get in view of what’s available to them, and they reject potentially good partners.
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ReaderT
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I’m 30. You’re still a “20-something”
To me it’s not a question of being “weird” or “sad” but rather “What is God’s will for my life?” That’s the important question. Maybe you’ll discern marriage and your wife will cross your path next month - maybe next year. Maybe you’ll discern the monastic life.
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StudentMI
Guest
I’m 32. Still single and plan to be for the remainder of my life.
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JanR
Guest
You’re so right, there! I did that kind of work when I was younger. It can be very hard work, long hours, and in some cases, thankless.Cecilia_Dympna:
Obviously, “SaintPhilomena” thinks maids and nannies don’t work “crazy long hours”.
Makes one wonder what kind of real world experience “SaintPhilomena” has with the working world or anything else.
I’m guessing, little or none.
When hubby and I stay at a hotel, we always try to be kind to the housekeeping staff. We see their carts in the aisles by the doors of the rooms in which their working, and I can tell you – that is NOT pleasant work. Especially the check-outs. You’d be appalled at some of the messes guests can leave behind, and how they can trash a room.
Moreover, hotel maids are expected to complete a specified number of rooms within a specified time frame. Which means they’re expected to work fast and efficiently. When guests trash their rooms and leave huge messes behind, that takes extra time for the maid to clean up, and throws off her schedule. Then, if her employer is unfair, SHE gets in trouble for not completing her assignments on time.
Been there, done that.
I resent how the OP has belittled working women. No connection to reality, at all.
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JanR
Guest
I think online dating might have something to do with this. People can be deceptive online. They can post outdated pictures, exaggerate or completely make up their bios, their attributes, etc. Then, when someone dates them, they are extremely disappointed because who they saw online isn’t anywhere near who they really are in real life.redcatholic:
You’re assuming that just because people have access to a bigger dating pool, everybody who wants a long-term relationship should be able to find one. But some people simply aren’t good at relationships. Having a bigger pool, techology etc doesn’t necessarily help them develop the skills they need to couple up with someone else.
Many of the people who are “perpetually single” come off so poorly, even just online, that it’s pretty easy to see why they are not attracting a partner. It’s also often easy to see how people who do well at the first couple stages of meeting someone, dating them etc drop the ball when it’s time to level up to the next stage. Or else they are unrealistically picky about what they can get in view of what’s available to them, and they reject potentially good partners.
Also, online dating can be dangerous. Predators are all over the place.
And, some people have difficulty communicating. That can be a major stumbling block.
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DeniseNY
Guest
I’m destroying the country. Who knew?
Albeit my suit is a very feminine suit. Does that make a difference?
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stpurl
Guest
I meant no disrespect to men, but rather that in 1890 in mainly Victorian London upper class society it was more that small group of men who promulgated such a position, and more to enhance their standing as ‘lord and master whose wife had no need to do ‘work’. IOW it was not meant so much to put down women but to exalt a socioeconomic status of some men.
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Saintly2
Guest
Every one here has an opinion.
Every religion offers community of similar social cult like opportunity.
Guess what you are there. At 29 many of your peer friends . are in evolved. So what to do?
Next is 10 years later ? Hmm now what?
Career ? Or family?
Friends are bussy… With their lives.
If you haven’t developed a circle of familiarity .i guess you should take up painting…
Or pottery…
Or buy a bee hive and become a honey person. But find a interest and communi3
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