Baby shower for unwed mother

[Elf01]

You don’t see fornication as a sin though.

Ways of participating in anothers sin

By counsel.
By command.
By consent.
By provocation.
By praise or flattery.
By concealment.
By partaking.
By silence.
By defense of the ill done?

 

[QwertyGirl]

You should certainly follow your conscience, as we all should.

Peace.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

You don’t see fornication as a sin though.

Ways of participating in anothers sin

By counsel.
By command.
By consent.
By provocation.
By praise or flattery.
By concealment.
By partaking.
By silence.
By defense of the ill done?

You’re not praising the sin.

I’d actually argue that no shower would be trying to conceal the sin.

 

[jlc2k2]

Who on this thread doesn’t see fornication as a sin? Attending a baby shower doesn’t mean that one thinks fornication is a-ok any more than attending Grandpa Joe’s wake means you agreed with every opinion he had and action he took.

 

[Xantippe]

Indeed, we need to find the balance between giving the mother needed support and not taking the sin out on the baby and appearing to approve of the sin though.

How much brow-beating of sexually active single women who don’t have babies do we do?

If it only falls on the ones who have live babies, that’s a problem.

 

[QwertyGirl]

Who on this thread doesn’t see fornication as a sin? Attending a baby shower doesn’t mean that one thinks fornication is a-ok any more than attending Grandpa Joe’s wake means you agreed with every opinion he had and action he took.

I think she was referring to me. I am agnostic, and my beliefs about human sexuality don’t exactly aligned with a Catholic Church. However, with that said, I am not sure I understand why she is concerned about fornication when we are discussing baby showers. The parents had sex, not the baby. It is a BABY shower, not a FORNICATOR shower.

 

[jlc2k2]

Ah! Thanks for the clarification. Even so my point still stands.

 

[Norseman82]

Let me ask everyone a question. What about a baby shower for a lesbian couple that conceived via IVF? This happened in my extended family in the past two years. Also, there is a current thread by a CAF a member whose son is in a same-sex relationship and one of the couple is using a surrogate mother to have a baby, so this is a timely question.

 

[Norseman82]

Oh, one other thing. For those who bring up the “embarrassment” factor, a bit of linguistic trivia: the Spanish word for “pregnant” is “embarazada”.

Also, the Polish word for “son” is “syn”, pronounced “sin”. My aunt once joked about her “syn”.

 

[Gwendolen]

I think it would depend on your relationship with the couple in question.

First off, I would assume that a couple that could afford IVF would not be in the same vulnerable position as a young single mom, and would be less in need of baby items.

If the mom of the baby was my daughter or close relative, I would go no question. I would want a relationship with my daughter, grandchild, etc no matter what.

Ask yourself how you would feel facing the baby as an adult. Can you imagine saying “I did not go to the event to celebrate your birth, etc, because I disapproved of how you were conceived and brought into this world?” If not a very close friend or close family member, you might just send a gift for the BABY and not go.

At the end of the day, other people have different religious beliefs than you. Not everyone believes pre-marital sex is wrong, not everyone believes gay marriage is wrong, not everyone believes IVF is wrong. I don’t expect people to have the same beliefs I do about a variety of things, yet I still celebrate their various life events. I am not going to limit my friendships and relationships to those who are following strict Catholic guidelines. Not even my Catholic friends follow all Catholic beliefs (like birth control). People on this board are much more hung up on these things than the Catholics I know in my life.

Even the Catholic hospital that is my employer provides benefits to spouses of same gender marriages and welcomes their children, same as any other employee.

And what is it about being gay lifestyle that makes people half shun the person in question more than other departures from scripture. For example, there appear to be about 100 directives in the Bible to serve the poor, but I don’t see threads like "Uncle George does nothing to help the poor, and is kind of a judgmental jacka** about poor people, goes to a Protestant church, but does not remember the Sabbath day and keep it holy, can we still invite him to Christmas dinner/attend his wedding/go to his wife’s baby shower/let our kids be around him under our supervision even though he is a poor example. I get why there is a belief that same gender marriage is not God’s plan for family, but not why this seem to trump many other diversions of religious disagreement.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Let me ask everyone a question. What about a baby shower for a lesbian couple that conceived via IVF? This happened in my extended family in the past two years. Also, there is a current thread by a CAF a member whose son is in a same-sex relationship and one of the couple is using a surrogate mother to have a baby, so this is a timely question.

Again, the difference between having sinned and being in sin. That is where I would draw the line between a party (with a gift in hand off the registry) and simply a box of diapers.

 

[Legend]

Oh, I wonder…is there still going to be a shower, now that the baby has been born?

 

[TheLittleLady]

Why are you sooo concerned with the details of this child’s conception? Leave that to God.

Agree. If we have to start disclosing the nitty gritty details of the conception before we get a “baby shower permit”, I don’t think I want to go to any more showers!

 

[TheLittleLady]

A baby is always a blessing. No qualifiers. Even babies born to nasty, dirty sinners.

 

[JimG]

Nothing wrong with providing a gift to an unborn baby. Even better might be a wedding shower, if the father involved accepted his responsibilities of fatherhood. In days past such acceptance of responsibility was expected. But now I have the impression that most would disfavor such a wedding and most priests would not perform it. Fathers are no longer expected to be responsible.

 

[Legend]

I believe the church’s usual position is to wait until after the baby’s birth. The purpose of the of marriage is to bestow the sacrament of holy matrimony-not to keep people from being embarrassed, or ensuring he would have his father’s name, or even for seeing that the child gets financial support. I believe the church changed her tune when many annulments were applied for-and granted-when it was found that the marriages were coerced.