Being cut in front of in the confession line

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2towers

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I hope this was the best place for this thread. Anyway, here it goes.

Like the title says, I was in confession line today for about ten minutes when this woman comes up to my place in line and stands to my left, out of line, but slightly ahead. Now, I am sick, with a chest cold, feeling bad, and in mortal sin to boot. [which is why we go to confession in the first place of course…]

Now this kind of thing has happened, and I have managed to work through it without getting mad, or I think I would have remembered it, but not today. So I am getting irritated, and I start thinking how wrong it is to get irritated and after ten minutes of this, and I guess she is feeling my irritation, she finally says to the guy in front of me…“I was behind you here earlier.” to which I say, “oh were you? I didn’t see you.” she replies… “oh yes, yes I went down in the church…”

There was a group of kids in front of all of us, milling around, and she says to the guy in front of me, "are they in line, or what? It just isn’t conducive to privacy, to which I respond, “well, I guess it is just take a number day.” Then the poor gentlemen ahead of us, asks the kids to get in line. They were not bothering me at this point.

I was very conflicted about the whole thing. I one point, I thought I might not now be properly disposed for confession, and maybe I should just leave. Then I thought well no, if this confession feels wrong or inadequate, I can just simply go again. I certainly had lost my grip on humility. Needless to say, I add anger to the confession list. I started praying the Hail Mary, and felt a little better by the time I saw the priest.

I did pray for her and apologized to God, but driving home I was still a bit irritated. If the lady had said “pardon me, I was in line and got out, would you mind if I took my place back”, I would have been very gracious and felt much better about the whole thing. I even started to tell her that, but I thought no, it might just make it worse.

Have you had a similar experience? Did you fare better than I did? Please share your thoughts if you would like to. I know most people must have been through this at one time or another!
 
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I’ve never had an experience like this, but I would have been irritated too. I think she should have said something to you about getting out of line and getting back in. The way she did it just seems inconsiderate.
 
2towers said:
getting mad
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Getting mad is not a sin only being uncharitable in thought or act. There are times for action based upon justified anger. I have not had someone cut in front of me at confessional but I have had the priest cancel the entire period of confession.
 
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It was a Catholic etiquette faux pas on her part.

Not to be like Mr. Manners or anything and brag, I did the opposite of the lady last time I went. I got to the Church early, thought I was gonna be first in line, but there was a guy sitting in the pews waiting. So I told him he could go first. He was like “it’s okay if you go”, but I was like “no, you can go” etc. We ended up talking for a few minutes and he was a nice guy. He only took like 2 minutes too, so it wasn’t a big deal.

I think you did the right thing. To get in an argument in Church over that wouldn’t be right.
 
So…you were annoyed? I’m not sure why it’s bothering you so much. You were mildly irritated but it doesn’t sound like you blew up or caused a scene. You didn’t do anything wrong. You can’t help feeling irritated. All you can do is control your reaction, which it sounds like you did.
 
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I think if I was in line for my confession I would be inclined to let it go. Now if it happened in the grocery store…lol.
 
BoomBoomMancini said:
So…you were annoyed? I’m not sure why it’s bothering you so much.
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sigh… actually, I was mad. I don’t like admitting it. I didn’t want to be, but I wasn’t feeling well. And I also thought some uncharitable thoughts, before dismissing them. That is why I added anger to the confession list. I always think of pride and anger as being bedfellows. There was a time, that I was quick to anger years ago, but I have made good inroads with dealing with that. To this day, I still pray the Litany of humility periodically.
 
I had a little mini road rage incident on the way there once. Knowing where I was headed made it easier to keep it where I did. I added that to the list for when I walked in.
 
I have been cut off at Target. The clerk completely ignored me and had someone go first. I didn’t say anything because the people apologized. (I guess that day I was invisible!)

Another time I was in line to quickly pay for a newspaper. It was one of those lines where I was standing without a shopping cart. When I went to pay for the paper, the people behind me had a conniption. “How dare she cut in front of us to pay for a paper!”
 
I’ve never had anything like this in the confession line, but I have had something similar happen.

I too remember that I would have been totally fine with the person simply saying something polite, she too was rude.

Though, the worst I have ever had was in line to pay a Friendly’s bill. There was a woman standing off to the side, digging though her purse. The guy behind the counter motions for me to walk up and pay my bill.

Then. the women turns to her kid (maybe 8 or 10) and says “Am I invisible?!? Am I invisible?!!?”

The guy behind the counter replies to her saying “no, maam, no one thinks you are not invisible.”

To which she replies, while pointing to me, “well he thinks I’m invisible!”

I was in shock regarding how rude she was. We left the Friendly’s and I was talking my wife (she was my girlfriend at the time) about how I couldn’t believe how rude she was.

Then, the woman walks of the restaurant and starts shouting at me, across the parking lot, “YOU GOT A PROBLEM?!?! I’LL GIVE YOU A F$%&*^$ PROBLEM!!!”

I was stunned and my wife yanked me into my car as the woman got in her expensive Mercedes.

In the car, I was fuming over what that women did that to me, and in front of her little kid too.

That was ~17 years ago, and I have never gotten over it. Every time we are in Long Island, NY, I recall that incident.

Moral of the story, I think we both need to say a few more Hail Marys! 🙂
 
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Two people cut me in line once. I got irritated but I just let it go since I didn’t want to start fighting with someone in the church. People have fought about it in our parish though. Our pastor had to move where Confessions were heard during Mass because people started fighting about their place in line.
 
RedDuke said:
Two people cut me in line once. I got irritated but I just let it go since I didn’t want to start fighting with someone in the church. People have fought about it in our parish though. Our pastor had to move where Confessions were heard during Mass because people started fighting about their place in line.
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Wow… your parish must be a great of example of the Church being a hospital for sinners! 😲
 
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Probably that would be a time where it would confirm my suspicion that the world is really unfair.

That kind of experience would only deplete my reservoir of goodwill which I took so long to gather.

So the world is really unfair alright. It will take years to top it up again.

You did well by acknowledging your unhappiness about it and thus you prayed to ease your state of mind. I probably would do worse by thinking that there are indeed people who just lack sensitivity to how others feel. And I cannot do anything about it except to accept it.

God bless.
 
2towers said:
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BoomBoomMancini:
So…you were annoyed? I’m not sure why it’s bothering you so much.
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sigh… actually, I was mad. I don’t like admitting it. I didn’t want to be, but I wasn’t feeling well. And I also thought some uncharitable thoughts, before dismissing them. That is why I added anger to the confession list. I always think of pride and anger as being bedfellows. There was a time, that I was quick to anger years ago, but I have made good inroads with dealing with that. To this day, I still pray the Litany of humility periodically.
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Maybe no one ever taught her how to properly call “fives”??? 🤔
 
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I’ve not been cut in front of lately, but I’ve had the experience of there being 20 minutes left for confession and the person ahead of me deciding to take up 19 of them. I find myself thinking, “Lord, I hope that person has some huge sin because otherwise this is ridiculous.”
 
2towers said:
Have you had a similar experience? Did you fare better than I did? Please share your thoughts if you would like to. I know most people must have been through this at one time or another!
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Can’t happen at our Church. We have rows of seats outside the confessional so that when someone goes in everyone moves along to the next seat.
 
I don’t know if this is the best example, but in waiting rooms for doctors, etc. some patients will be called ahead of you, even if you were there first
 
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