This is an interesting discussion.
Is it possible that a man (all the outward appearances) can “feel” like a woman feels, but nevertheless be a man? For example, I see something cute that an child does and I feel “Oh! Isn’t that darling!” but being a man, I mask that feeling by expressing, “That’s cute.” I am feeling, I think, exactly like a woman feels, but I go to the trouble of expressing it as a stereotype man would in order not to appear feminine.
We all have both masculine and feminine traits. Some men are pretty and some women are handsome. Some men feel all kinds of soft and tender emotions and some women feel all kinds of strong and assertive feelings. So what is transgender? If all my feelings are feminine, does that make me a woman in your view? Or do I have to definitely believe I am a woman trapped in a man’s body?
Why is it considered a torture for a man to have feminine feelings? Why can’t he learn to express those feeling in a more acceptable form for the sake of blending in? Is self expression so awfully important? Or if he is courageous, why can’t he simply express his feelings as they are, no apologies?
Would not such a person, say, a man, seek out someone trustworthy to share those feelings, like for instance, a sympathetic woman? Could not writing poetry be a way for a man to express feminine feelings. I love poetry, by the way, so don’t get me wrong. I don’t see the appropriateness of surgery to align a man’s feelings with his body. I don’t believe it is a right to be able to express one’s feelings in line with their sexual function. It may be a mismatch, but I am sure there is the right partner for that situation.
Rather than transgender, I prefer, in the case of a man, to think of it as a man with feminine feelings, much more pronounced, maybe even totally so, than the average man, who also may have some feminine feelings and qualities. Do you find this perspective on it to be entirely unacceptable, and if so, please, why?
I know this is the “me” generation, but isn’t there some wisdom in such cases in simply accepting what is. To me, a man with feminine feelings is not the most horrible prospect in the world, and I do not assume a person who expresses himself in a feminine manner to be effeminate in any bad sense nor homosexual. I would suggest that person try to cultivate masculine feelings, if that is possible, and to at least, express himself in a more masculine manner if acceptance is critical to his comfort.
I don’t know of any commandment that says, "Thou shalt feel like a man (or vice versa)! " Acceptance of oneself might well be the only course of action wise and necessary. I would wholly reject surgery to change an undeniably male body into the semblance of a female body in order to match inner feelings with outward appearances. To me there is something sacred about the bodies that God gave us, unless they are obviously malformed as in the case of someone having both male and female organs.
A man with feminine feelings who has his body changed to be like a woman, is a man with a women’s body and feminine feelings, not a woman. Only God can create a woman, or at least, that’s my belief. So how do you respond to these thoughts? Is there any agreement at all between us? I hope so. I don’t mean to be disrespectful or condescending.
I have a good friend, a male, who claims he is transgender, and at different periods has dressed as a woman. He also has seriously considered a sex change operation. We have had lengthy conversations in the past, and are still friends, though we do not appear to think alike on this subject. He acts and talks as any man would in conversation. .
