Brides, would you trash your wedding gown?

[SMHW]

I hadn’t heard this was a trend. But it’s nothing completely new either.

When my husband’s brother got married (roughly 20 years ago) his wife did something like that. They got married out on a the lawn at this little rustic inn which had a creek running behind it. She wore a beautiful white dress. The men all wore matching formal attire; my brother-in-law even wore a top-hat. But after all the standard picture taking parts of the reception were over she followed through on previously made plans and sat down in the creek on one of the chairs provided for people wanting to keep cool. I don’t think there was any mud but I can’t imagine all that water did much for her dress.

 

[Rob_s_Wife]

**Heck no! I don’t feel I spent a fortune on my dress, but it was a very nice dress and I plan to keep it for any daughter/daughter-in-law or granddaughter that may want to wear it. Worst case, they can all bury me in it! **

 

[Island_Oak]

After my divorce, I donated mine to the Association for the Blind thrift shop. I figured I went into that disaster of a marriage as a blind fool, so this was an appropriate charity…

:bowdown: Not to make light of divorce…but you clearly escaped with your sense of humor intact!!

 

[OldAgeGuru]

Mine is sitting in a box in a closet. I wanted to rent one, so that I could have a really gorgeous gown I could never afford to buy, and then not have the hindrance of keeping it around. I know I never wanted to wear my mother’s wedding dress…the thing was hideous. And by the time my daughters are getting married, the styles will be all different and they will want to choose their own.
Word. My mom offered me her dress for my upcoming wedding, I wouldn’t put that ugly thing on if she paid me. The only uglier thing in my parents wedding phots are those ridiculous robins egg blue tuxes my dad and his groomsman wore. What were people thinking in the 70’s??!!! She had me try on a horrible dress with a duster, and I felt like Miss Havisham in Great Expectations. I thought while wearing the dress I was doomed to wonder around my decrepit mansion with a witchy niece while mentally torturing a local boy. I told her she was not allowed to have any (name removed by moderator)ut on my dress after that nightmare. I would gladly trash that dress.
I think our wedding cost less than $10,000 total, and I mean including the rings.How? The reception alone is setting us back almost 20 thousand and that not with centerpieces or cake or dj

**Heck no! I don’t feel I spent a fortune on my dress, but it was a very nice dress and I plan to keep it for any daughter/daughter-in-law or granddaughter that may want to wear it. Worst case, they can all bury me in it! **

See I think every woman does that. But like dusky jewel said, by the time it’s your kids turn, styles have changed, and she will have the same reaction to your dress as I have to my mothers. I mean I’m sure it was very stylish back in the 70’s, but it looks like a mantilla threw up on her and just kept growing. I can only hope for the world’s progeny that that style never returns.

 

[Sailor_Kenshin]

I have never heard of this. I sure would not intentionally dirty or damage my lovely dress!!

I wish I had one!

 

[Petergee]

**My dress has no special significance to me. It’s my rings that symbolize my love for my husband and his for me. The dress…once removed that night …was history. It’s already yellowing (we’ve only been married 19months.) I saw no purpose in getting it preserved…I mean the chances of me having a girl that would be the EXACT same size, build and shape on her wedding day…yeah right. **
Maybe not a daughter but there are other wonderful possibilities. My Mum sewed her own beautiful wedding dress. A few years later my Dad’s sister borrowed it for her wedding. When we announced our engagement, the first thing my Mum said to my fiancee was “I’ve got a dress you can wear!”. And she did. My wife found it a wonderful expression of being welcomed and accepted into our family. She wasn’t at all concerned about the dress being “old-fashioned”. In both cases my Mum had to adjust the dress a bit to fit. My Mum is shortish and my wife is tallish but it looked great on both of them.

 

[Andinell]

I love the idea of having my dress made into a baptismal gown, anyone know how to find someone to do it for me?

 

[Almeria]

How? The reception alone is setting us back almost 20 thousand and that not with centerpieces or cake or dj

Maybe it’s a matter of where you are getting married. We wanted to do our wedding as inexpensively as possible, and got married in a rural area. I believe the Knights of Columbus hall that we had the reception in was $200 for the night. My mother-in-law catered it. The dj was a friend that had a huge cd collection, and we rented a stereo system and speakers from Rent-A-Center for the night.

While I’d love for my daughters to wear my dress, I doubt anyone else would be able to fit in it. My mother-in-law made it for me (that and catered–she’s a talented woman!), and it is definitely custom dimensions. I like the idea of turning it into a christening gown, though!

 

[Sr_Sally]

I think our wedding cost less than $10,000 total, and I mean including the rings.How? The reception alone is setting us back almost 20 thousand and that not with centerpieces or cake or dj.

She probably did what many of us do and restrained herself. Don’t invite everyone you’ve ever met, don’t think ice sculptures are necessary, don’t serve filet mingon and have an open bar, don’t give everyone an engraved bauble as a party favor, don’t have 3,000 ballons in the decor.

The reception does not have to be the best, most magical, most wonderfulest night ever, for it to be memorable. I got married in one of the most expensive cities in the country and we managed a beautiful wedding and a wonderful reception on much, much less than 20 thousand! In fact, we might still be paying for the wedding if it had cost that much!!!

 

[duskyjewel]

Honestly? Connections! Knowing the right people can save you tons of money, as can price shopping on things like cakes and flowers.

My dad worked with the guy who catered, so the food was at cost. It was a very simple chicken and tri-tip meal. I think he knew the DJ through someone, too. And yet another guy on the police department (my dad was a cop) was a member of the VFW, and so got us the hall to use either free or very cheap. Even though I wanted red roses, we didn’t have a ton of them. I think the flowers were like $1500. The cake, four tiers, was only a couple hundred. It was a small wedding too, though. Didn’t even fill the first half-dozen rows of pews in the Church. We had the full Mass though. And I don’t remember the cantor and other fees at the Church being outrageous, either. It was our childhood parish. The photographer was the same one who took the pictures at our Catholic schools, and he gave parishioners a discount on their wedding photos. All our parents went in on the costs, but we bought the rings.

As for 70s styles… My dad wore the same robin’s egg blue with the ruffled shirt…oh man. But my mom’s dress… where do I start? She fell in love with Franco Zefferelli’s Romeo and Juliet, and had her dress made in that empire waist style. (Good as she was at least four months pregnant with me at the time!) The top was DARK PURPLE SATIN and the bottom was cream. I mean, it was just awful. Tee hee…wonder what our kids will say about us in 20 or 30 years?

 

[aboverubies]

I plan to dress up in mine on our 10th wedding anniversary (next month!) and twirl around the living room reminiscing and feeling girly. Then I’ll pack it away for another 10 years I guess.

 

[hasikelee]

The volunteer couple at our engaged encounter said they saved the tux and dress and wear them every anniversary. (hehe, the lady said she had to have it let out in later years).

They said it’s great fun to dress up, go out on a date and remember the grand day. Apparently, a few times people have bought their dinner! lol

 

[puzzleannie]

I asked my daughters, one had hers made into a christening gown, worn by all her children, including a bonnet that will unfold to a hankie for her daughter’s wedding day. One had hers made into a first communion dress, worn be 2 daughters and a couple of their cousins. One still has her boxed in storage, with no plans for it, but will probably sell it on e-bay with all the other stuff they have to get rid of to make room for baby.

 

[OutinChgoburbs]

I love the idea of having my dress made into a baptismal gown, anyone know how to find someone to do it for me?

Shop around locally for somebody. Look in the local paper.

I know an older lady (and she grows older every day!) who made each of her daughter’s gowns into baptismal gowns- in some cases, with big trains, two baptismal gowns and a fancy blankie!

If you have the talent, pattern companies make baptismal gown patterns. It’s a matter of being careful with the seams, then piecing out the pattern pieces, or so I was told.

 

[OutinChgoburbs]

The volunteer couple at our engaged encounter said they saved the tux and dress and wear them every anniversary. (hehe, the lady said she had to have it let out in later years).

They said it’s great fun to dress up, go out on a date and remember the grand day. Apparently, a few times people have bought their dinner! lol

Not if you were married in the early to mid 70s and have a sky blue or mint green tux…And I don’t know what we were thinking, either. Guys thought they were cool.

 

[Andinell]

Shop around locally for somebody. Look in the local paper.

I know an older lady (and she grows older every day!) who made each of her daughter’s gowns into baptismal gowns- in some cases, with big trains, two baptismal gowns and a fancy blankie!

If you have the talent, pattern companies make baptismal gown patterns. It’s a matter of being careful with the seams, then piecing out the pattern pieces, or so I was told.

:doh2: thank you.

 

[Sarabande]

I would not have purposely trashed my gown. It was the most beautiful and special (not to mention most expensive) gown I’ve ever worn or owned. I chose it specifically to match my mother’s cathedral-length cape train from her gown. The intricate beading and color of the fabric matched the gown perfectly. Surprisingly the material did not discolor at all.

She had it custom made by a friend of hers in the Philippines who was a couture designer and actually didn’t see or tried on the gown until a week before the wedding. (He had to send it to her from the Philippines. It very elegant and beautiful and cost $100 in 1971. When she had it priced in America, it was priced as $2000 in 1971. So, did she get a bargain!!!

I couldn’t fit into her gown. She was 5’2" and a size 0. I’m 5’5" and a size 4/6. So the best I could do was detach her cape train and attach it to mine for the mass and then remove for the reception.

I did save my gown for my future daughters. If I have at least one who is similar to me, she’ll be nostalgic and want to wear the gown. And I’m not petite like my mother, so I’m counting on one of my future daughters to be built similarily. We boxed up the cape train separately in case my sister wants to wear it if she gets married.

 

[CarrieH]

:bowdown: Not to make light of divorce…but you clearly escaped with your sense of humor intact!!

Thanks. It helps that it was a mutual decision, sort of, “what were we thinking???” Long story, but that’s what youth, stupidity, and a lack of a religious upbringing can do to a so-called marriage.

CarrieH, much older and hopefully much wiser!

 

[Truly_Beloved]

I would never trash my wedding dress. Just like I would never trash my baptismal shroud. I received great Sacraments wearing those clothes!

**Heck no! I don’t feel I spent a fortune on my dress, but it was a very nice dress and I plan to keep it for any daughter/daughter-in-law or granddaughter that may want to wear it. Worst case, they can all bury me in it! **

This is me!! I absolutely love my dress, and would love to “pass it on.” I would have worn my mother’s or mother-in-law’s dresses in a heartbeat (I’m really sentimental that way), but neither of them still had their gowns by the time I was getting married.

I plan to dress up in mine on our 10th wedding anniversary (next month!) and twirl around the living room reminiscing and feeling girly. Then I’ll pack it away for another 10 years I guess.

I thought about wearing mine again for our 25th and then our 50th wedding anniversary parties. Yes, in public! With witnesses! I figure by the time I’m 47 and 72, I really won’t care what people think of me, anyway, and it would be so much fun.

 

[Zooey]

**it was a very nice dress and I plan to keep it … Worst case, they can all bury me in it! **

This made me smile…
In her last years, my mother got into the habit of planning & re-planning the details of her funeral. ( , but true).
The one thing she always had trouble deciding, she couldn’t think what she wanted to be buried in…I would just shrug, & say, “I’ll be the one deciding that, & I’m burying you in your wedding dress”.
Oh, how she would sputter!! “That’s the most ridiculous thing I ever heard! Who ever heard of anyone being buried in their wedding dress of all things??”
This went on for years…It got to be a kind of little joke between us…You know? “What kind of a :whacky: crazy daughter have I raised, anyway?”
But then, when she died…I went up into the attic, found the box with her wedding dress in it, & gave it to the undertaker to dress her in…
I fully expect, that when I see her in the next life, she will take me, & shake me, for burying her in her wedding gown…