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prayerrider
Guest
Didn’t one have a kangaroo?
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lilypadrees
Guest
I asked myself the same question when I was refused and unable to take my final vows, Rosie. And I was 4 or 5 when I first felt the Call. It never left me. I still want to be a nun. But I can’t due to my physical health. (Yours may not remain as it is now either. Bear that in mind.)
Thanks to my friend who told me about the Oblates, I feel very at peace with my decision to follow that path instead. I truly feel I am doing God’s Will not only in the secular world but also in caring for my elderly mother whose mobility issues became more serious in 2012 and would have placed her in a nursing home for the rest of her life had I joined my chosen Order and moved into the Convent. All of my pets would have been put down if no one could have taken them because I wouldn’t have been able to keep them with me. And my mother would not have been able to take care of them on her own.
You see, Rosie, God works in mysterious ways. The mission that we want isn’t always the best one for us to serve Him. He has a mission for you, for us all. But the one you want may not be it. He may have something more for you to do even though you can’t see it now.
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Londoner
Guest
I wonder whether you’ve listened to this, which addresses exactly the question you raise: Can I bring my pet schnauzer to the convent if I become a nun? | A Nun's Life Ministry It is a response, by nuns, to a woman who asked them whether she’d be able to bring her dog if she were to become a nun.
Here is a community of male religious for whom dogs are a big part of their life, although not, it seems, as personal pets: https://newskete.org/our-dogs (Georgian Orthodox religious, male and female, apparently often breed and train Caucasian shepherd dogs.)
One thing that worried me was where you say you’ve never earned a penny in your life, and you say that your father has always given you anything that you want. If you are considering entering a life where you would have no independence and no personal property, do you not wonder whether it would be a good idea to experience these things before choosing to give them up? I know that when I was weighing up whether I had a genuine vocation to become a priest or religious I was strongly encouraged to go to university to study something other than theology and to have a job to give me the experience of ordinary working life and the independence and responsibility that comes with earning one’s own living.
I appreciate that in the past it was quite common for young people, sometimes still children, to move directly from their parents’ home to a seminary or religious community, but this does not appear always to have been a good thing, either for the individual person or for the wider Church. Although I know people for whom this way of doing things has been successful, I can think immediately of three men I know who decided to become priests when they were still boys and rather promptly gave it up to go to university, become teachers, marry, and have children. I imagine that they would have found it easier to discern their vocations if they had been encouraged to receive an education, experience the world of work, and meet women before deciding that they wanted to be priests!
My feeling is that if your being able to take your dogs into the religious life with you is so great a concern, you have perhaps not yet thought seriously enough about all of the other implications of committing yourself to this life. Is it possible that you are considering becoming a nun at least partly because you have never had the opportunity to experience an independent life with a job and the ability to support yourself with your own income? It may well be that you will indeed end up becoming a nun, but for now, wouldn’t you like to experience what it would be like to have a job, to earn your own money, and to live as a properly autonomous adult?
Here is a community of male religious for whom dogs are a big part of their life, although not, it seems, as personal pets: https://newskete.org/our-dogs (Georgian Orthodox religious, male and female, apparently often breed and train Caucasian shepherd dogs.)
One thing that worried me was where you say you’ve never earned a penny in your life, and you say that your father has always given you anything that you want. If you are considering entering a life where you would have no independence and no personal property, do you not wonder whether it would be a good idea to experience these things before choosing to give them up? I know that when I was weighing up whether I had a genuine vocation to become a priest or religious I was strongly encouraged to go to university to study something other than theology and to have a job to give me the experience of ordinary working life and the independence and responsibility that comes with earning one’s own living.
I appreciate that in the past it was quite common for young people, sometimes still children, to move directly from their parents’ home to a seminary or religious community, but this does not appear always to have been a good thing, either for the individual person or for the wider Church. Although I know people for whom this way of doing things has been successful, I can think immediately of three men I know who decided to become priests when they were still boys and rather promptly gave it up to go to university, become teachers, marry, and have children. I imagine that they would have found it easier to discern their vocations if they had been encouraged to receive an education, experience the world of work, and meet women before deciding that they wanted to be priests!
My feeling is that if your being able to take your dogs into the religious life with you is so great a concern, you have perhaps not yet thought seriously enough about all of the other implications of committing yourself to this life. Is it possible that you are considering becoming a nun at least partly because you have never had the opportunity to experience an independent life with a job and the ability to support yourself with your own income? It may well be that you will indeed end up becoming a nun, but for now, wouldn’t you like to experience what it would be like to have a job, to earn your own money, and to live as a properly autonomous adult?
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Rosie11
Guest
Woman in my culture don’t work I’m not aloud to get a job nor am I aloud to go to school I can either get married or live with my family forever, this isn’t something I decided on a whim this is something that has been with me for over a year and I’ve tried to forget it tried to be normal and want the things I’m sopos to want but I can’t it’s always at the back of my mind I’m not the type of person to commit to something and give I’m rather quickly once I’m in I’m in and I’ll stick with it to the end
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lilypadrees
Guest
By doing this, you are defiantly disobeying your family as well as disobeying the 4th Commandment to “Honor thy father and mother.”
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Bluebright
Guest
Rosie I dont think it’s the norm as it is a sign of attachment to the world, usually you give up everything… but the here in England we are very short of nuns so things are often a little less strict so there is no harm in asking. Though if you have a true calling you would need to be prepared to give them up for love of God.
You are right some retreat houses and convents have animals (not only dogs or cats but farm animals too), but this is not your decision which animals they are and they do not belong to any one person, in fact nothing belongs to any one person.
Which order have you considered? As you are so loving of animals, have you looked into Franciscan order? It is possible that the work part of you calling may be working with animals if it is God’s will and he may lead you to a greater love one day, if you put your trust in him now. For your formation you will need to give up a lot more than just the outside things and in all honestly you will need all your attention for God.
I was once very close to someone who used marriage to escape from a very similar life to the one you have, so discern carefully with God that you are not using the religious life to escape. England is a free country and the way of life you describe is not legal, despite your culture, there are other ways to be free, if you should wish to be assisted. God has given you the dignity of free choice and he does not restrict that, only we do that to ourselves.
You are right some retreat houses and convents have animals (not only dogs or cats but farm animals too), but this is not your decision which animals they are and they do not belong to any one person, in fact nothing belongs to any one person.
Which order have you considered? As you are so loving of animals, have you looked into Franciscan order? It is possible that the work part of you calling may be working with animals if it is God’s will and he may lead you to a greater love one day, if you put your trust in him now. For your formation you will need to give up a lot more than just the outside things and in all honestly you will need all your attention for God.
I was once very close to someone who used marriage to escape from a very similar life to the one you have, so discern carefully with God that you are not using the religious life to escape. England is a free country and the way of life you describe is not legal, despite your culture, there are other ways to be free, if you should wish to be assisted. God has given you the dignity of free choice and he does not restrict that, only we do that to ourselves.
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Bluebright
Guest
That’s not true in all situations. If her family are treating her as a prisoner and not in keeping with her dignity as free person, the dignity that God gave her, then it is not right to live under them, but instead to leave. She is 18, she has the right to chose to work (St Paul told us this quite strongly), to leave the family house as she wishes with it being against her family’s wishes, to go to school and to choose her own way in the world. This is the dignity of free choice given to us by God. No person should ever take this from us and try to enslave us. That is a high offence against God. Modern slavery.
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Rosie11
Guest
I’ll look into the Franciscan order
it really isn’t to escape, I once wanted to get married and have children like I’m sopose to but after a trip to medj last year I saw a nun sitting alone praying I thought “god I’d love to be like her” when I got back I wanted to become a nun but I tried to forget it but the thought was always there again I went to medj and it rekindled my desire to become a nun while I was there I gave a beggar woman some money and told her about god and Mary she was smiling and told me I should be a charismatic prayer(or something like that) or a nun like she didn’t even know I wanted to be one, then I saw a lady called Nancy she saw the Virgin Mary many years ago she moved to medj she told me out of a group of people to stay pure and stay in the eyes of god
it really isn’t to escape, I once wanted to get married and have children like I’m sopose to but after a trip to medj last year I saw a nun sitting alone praying I thought “god I’d love to be like her” when I got back I wanted to become a nun but I tried to forget it but the thought was always there again I went to medj and it rekindled my desire to become a nun while I was there I gave a beggar woman some money and told her about god and Mary she was smiling and told me I should be a charismatic prayer(or something like that) or a nun like she didn’t even know I wanted to be one, then I saw a lady called Nancy she saw the Virgin Mary many years ago she moved to medj she told me out of a group of people to stay pure and stay in the eyes of god
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Rosie11
Guest
And for some reason I’m seeing the word “nun” everywhere
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Rosie11
Guest
And I’m quit happy here I really am for anyone else it may be strange but this is what I’m use to and besides even if I had the choice to have a normal job I wouldn’t the thought of it terrifies me, I don’t know how to be in the world alone, ive never gotten on a train or a bus alone, I have a terrible sense of direction, I don’t what taxes are or why we have to pay them, I think a convent would be perfect for me :hugs:
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HeDa
Guest
No convent is going to accept a woman who doesn’t stand solidly with both feet on the ground.
In a convent there needs to be someone who pays the bills and does the accounts, cooks, cleans, takes care of the garden and moves the lawn (included repairs the lawn mover) , maintains the buildings with work like plumbing, water leeks, heating/cooling system, ventilation etc etc etc. Sisters learn more than the basics because the convents, for most of the time, can’t afford to have a repairman coming in to do the job. Some tasks require a professional and any convent would love a sister with necessary qualifications to do electrical work or construction when the roof needs to be fixed or replaced.
In a convent there needs to be someone who pays the bills and does the accounts, cooks, cleans, takes care of the garden and moves the lawn (included repairs the lawn mover) , maintains the buildings with work like plumbing, water leeks, heating/cooling system, ventilation etc etc etc. Sisters learn more than the basics because the convents, for most of the time, can’t afford to have a repairman coming in to do the job. Some tasks require a professional and any convent would love a sister with necessary qualifications to do electrical work or construction when the roof needs to be fixed or replaced.
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Rosie11
Guest
I can run a household that’s what I’ve been trained to do since a very young age I was 11 years old looking after newborn twins only a few days old because my sister was in icu I can garuntee you that my standard of clean is cleaner than anyone else’s because my mother had OCD we had to take things apart of clean them everything that could be taken apart in our house is unscrewed or unclipped and cleaned and we all have different roles in our house too I cook the breakfast lunch and dinner and my sister does the dishes I clean upstairs and my sister cleans downstairs I do the outside windows she does the inside we don’t spot clean in my house every single thing is cleaned every single day so I could do the cooking and cleaning I’m also very good with kids especially baby’s
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Cloisters
Well-known member
Look locally first, then. I would have to know what diocese you’re in before I could assist you.
Your pets do look wonderful, and I’m sure they’re worthy companions. I know of a Discalced Carmelite nun who used to come to this area for medical treatment with her cat. The reason the nuns sent the cat was because the feline had developed an attachment to the nun, and usually went crazy during thunderstorms.
Even Franciscans have to concentrate on human souls. If any group were to deal with animals, they would have to be laity, and include some form of apostolate to human souls.
Your pets do look wonderful, and I’m sure they’re worthy companions. I know of a Discalced Carmelite nun who used to come to this area for medical treatment with her cat. The reason the nuns sent the cat was because the feline had developed an attachment to the nun, and usually went crazy during thunderstorms.
Even Franciscans have to concentrate on human souls. If any group were to deal with animals, they would have to be laity, and include some form of apostolate to human souls.
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Rosie11
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Hertfordshire x
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Rosie11
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Omg I just checked online there are only 300 nuns in England I thought there where a lot more
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LawyersGunsAndMoney
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She’s an adult and it sounds like her family is deliberately keeping her from becoming independent and learning to function. Honoring your parents does not mean mindlessly obeying them forever or when they’re being unreasonable.
I get what you’re saying as a general rule, but I think under these circumstances she might need to get out on her own a bit
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Londoner
Guest
That is really not good advice. The commandment to honour one’s mother and father is clearly not intended to give parents lifelong control over their children. Parents do not have the right to dictate to their adult children where they are allowed to live, what job they are allowed to do (and, in this case, whether they can have a job at all), what money (if any) they can earn, whom they are allowed to marry, and so on. In England in 2019 Rosie’s family do not have the right to tell her that they do not want her to leave their home, and it is not helpful to use God’s commandments to back this up.
Cloisters
Well-known member
Well, let’s start with this:
http://cloisters.tripod.com/vocations_uk/
The x after your response is understood.
http://cloisters.tripod.com/vocations_uk/
The x after your response is understood.
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Londoner
Guest
I do appreciate that this is how you feel. However, I think that you do need to understand that most nuns and religious sisters will not share your background. Religious communities are not filled with people who are terrified of having a normal job, who would not know how to survive in the world alone, who cannot use public transport, or who do not understand how to manage their personal finances or how society and the economy work.
You say that you are not allowed to go to school or have a job. That is not normal in the UK in the 21st century. It is actually not even legal. The law in this country requires children to stay at school (or equivalent, e.g. tutoring at home) until age 16 and to remain in full-time education, or an apprenticeship or training, or a combination of work or voluntary work with additional education or training, until the age of 18. That is not a cultural expectation, it is the law.
I think that you may need to reassess your idea of what a nun’s life is like. Nuns and sisters have often been highly educated, independent women. Until quite recently, nuns and sisters were often the only women in many societies who were able to access a high level of education, live independently of the control of their fathers or husbands, own property (as a community), and wield power and influence (some abbesses were as powerful as lords and princes). Many nuns and sisters have academic degrees and/or professional qualifications that enable them to do jobs such as teaching, nursing, social work, or writing and lecturing. Many have been enterprising, entrepreneurial women who have established and managed schools, hospitals, and even farms and factories.
Your community may not actually want you just to do the cooking and cleaning and looking after babies. They may want to send you away to study theology or to train for a profession such as teaching or nursing. They may need you to be able to manage the community’s real estate and investments, to be able to pay income tax and national insurance for its employees, or to take responsibility for business enterprises, such as a school, a publishing house, manufacturing communion hosts, honey, beer, rosaries, or candles, or providing hospitality to pilgrims or tourists. You may need to be able to think of innovative ways to sustain the community’s viability (such as the convent in Poland that credits its survival in recent times to one nun’s inspired idea of establishing a fish farm). Even the most strictly enclosed communities, such as the monks of the Grande Chartreuse, will sometimes have to travel, e.g. to teach, lecture, or guide retreats, to attend religious conferences, or for business meetings. With ever fewer women becoming nuns, it is all the more likely that in the future you will have to take on more and more responsibility for your community’s material survival under increasingly difficult circumstances. I think that these are all things that you will need to consider.
You say that you are not allowed to go to school or have a job. That is not normal in the UK in the 21st century. It is actually not even legal. The law in this country requires children to stay at school (or equivalent, e.g. tutoring at home) until age 16 and to remain in full-time education, or an apprenticeship or training, or a combination of work or voluntary work with additional education or training, until the age of 18. That is not a cultural expectation, it is the law.
I think that you may need to reassess your idea of what a nun’s life is like. Nuns and sisters have often been highly educated, independent women. Until quite recently, nuns and sisters were often the only women in many societies who were able to access a high level of education, live independently of the control of their fathers or husbands, own property (as a community), and wield power and influence (some abbesses were as powerful as lords and princes). Many nuns and sisters have academic degrees and/or professional qualifications that enable them to do jobs such as teaching, nursing, social work, or writing and lecturing. Many have been enterprising, entrepreneurial women who have established and managed schools, hospitals, and even farms and factories.
Your community may not actually want you just to do the cooking and cleaning and looking after babies. They may want to send you away to study theology or to train for a profession such as teaching or nursing. They may need you to be able to manage the community’s real estate and investments, to be able to pay income tax and national insurance for its employees, or to take responsibility for business enterprises, such as a school, a publishing house, manufacturing communion hosts, honey, beer, rosaries, or candles, or providing hospitality to pilgrims or tourists. You may need to be able to think of innovative ways to sustain the community’s viability (such as the convent in Poland that credits its survival in recent times to one nun’s inspired idea of establishing a fish farm). Even the most strictly enclosed communities, such as the monks of the Grande Chartreuse, will sometimes have to travel, e.g. to teach, lecture, or guide retreats, to attend religious conferences, or for business meetings. With ever fewer women becoming nuns, it is all the more likely that in the future you will have to take on more and more responsibility for your community’s material survival under increasingly difficult circumstances. I think that these are all things that you will need to consider.
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Kaliaa
Guest
Rosie, correct me if I’m wrong but I believe I read in one of your other posts that you are part of the traveler community. I’m sorry if I’ve given the wrong name but you are part of the “gypsy” culture which is totally different than that which most of us in the US experience hence your comments about your parents and lack of “worldly” experience is normal in your culture.
I am asking because it seems that a number of the posters here are getting the wrong impression about your relationship with your parents, etc. If I am wrong, please correct me.
I am asking because it seems that a number of the posters here are getting the wrong impression about your relationship with your parents, etc. If I am wrong, please correct me.
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