Catholics Marrying Protestants

[BamaRider]

I have never understood why that is such a bad thing.

Because I believe, more often then not, it leads to be wishy washy in whatever they decide to do.

I never feared my son being exposed to Non Catholic Faiths, after I was confident he was well versed in the Faith.

I understand many people leave the Faith for various reasons, but if my son is one of them it will not be because I failed to cathecize him properly.

 

[Lil_Cat]

Because I believe, more often then not, it leads to be wishy washy in whatever they decide to do.

But couldn’t they just as often become stronger in whichever faith because they examined the merits of both?

 

[GhostMan]

I am in mixed marriage; as I have posted many times, I highly discourage this for anyone. It can work, I believe, if one party is not all that devout in their faith. When both are, the clashes have little room for compromise. We are, after all, talking about matters of faith.

When it comes to children, I do not believe that they should be raised in both faiths; it diminishes both faiths to the point where the child will not be grounded nor will they respect either one.

I think that if both parents are devout, the children should be raised in the father’s faith. If only one parent is devout, then the children should be raised in that faith.

 

[fled]

Being a cradle Catholic, who in his teens through 20’s was an ardent atheist who had a subsequently powerful re-conversion back to the Catholic Faith, I chose to study Theology at a non-denominational university because I felt in my heart if Catholicism was the faith for me, it would show itself evident regardless who was instructing at the head of the class.

Ive had Priests, Sisters, Lutheran’s and several other Protestant professors, and I loved them all. And you know what? I’m a stronger Catholic for it. While the other Catholic kids were in the back feeling despair at some of the things being said, I was standing up asking the hard questions my faith demanded of me.

Afterwords, my Catholic classmates would come to me and let me know how happy they were I got up and said something. I always told them “this aint Sunday School but it sure will make you a tougher Catholic.”

Granted some are more easily led astray with little convincing. So there is definitely a case for a solid Catholic education. All I am illustrating is that the the Church’s teachings aint made of glass either and they will stand up to rigorous scrutiny as they should, as we have been promised.

 

[Alix1912]

I’m not talking about Baptism. I’m talking about the rest of the sacraments. There are 7 in the Catholic faith.

I am aware that there are 7 sacraments in the Catholic Faith. Your post refered to wanting kids babptized Catholic so the could recieve grace in baptism. Since the Catholic Church recognizes Lutheran, and several other protestant baptisms as valid, do they not convey grace as well?

Do you feel the children should be exposed to both Faiths equally and let them draw their own conclusions?

I imagine that this kids will predominantly attend one church, but I will certainly encourage them to understand and learn about both faiths, and my husband and I are working on ways to incorporate traditions from both of our families and faiths into our home. I certainly am not going to hide one parents faith from them or act as if it is less important.

 

[agapewolf]

I meant the ability to receive the additional sacraments. I was not talking about Baptism itself. I was simply trying to explain to you why Catholics are the way they are with wanting the children to be Catholic.

 

[cmmamula]

and there’s your answer.

I’m sorry you felt like I was putting myself above you. I certainly was not. I am not married. There is no reason to be irritated. Really…However, I was simply stating what MY priorities were, and what yours were. It is not important for you to share the Eucharist in marriage. It is for me.

ANd by the way, LOVE in the catechism is defined from the bible. And it is a choice…it is NOT either/or. I think you might learn something if you read the catechism on the definition of it. Please point out to me where love is defined in the bible as “falling in love” where you don’t make a decision? You can’t do it because its not there. Love is defined by Christ’s death on the cross, not some infatuation. (Now read here, I’m not saying you are only infatuated…so please dont reply as if I did) Eph 5: Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church. It’s right there. Also “Put on love” . That is a decision, a choice. Not something that is a feeling

If you do not choose to love your spouse, then it will come and go with your feelings. That is where divorce comes in. Love is a decision. Plain and simple. From the bible and catechism.

The Eucharist IS NOT just between you and God, but it is a community of people as the Body of Christ. I also highly suggest reading Theology of the Body…I guess I just don’t understand how you would NOT feel the need to share the Eucharist when it is plain in John 6! When you know that it is infinite grace and touching God’s divine life…it would be unbareabe for me not to be able to have that grace available to him too.

I dont apprciate your tone. Mine was not condescending, just simply stating facts. There are some people here that come to paint a beautiful picture of mixed marriages (or Catholic/non-Christian), that when you dig only one post into it, you find out it is NOT as beautiful as it seems.

First of all, your not married? Then how can you relate to any of this?

John 6? Do you mean John 7, Feast of the Taberncacle? I’m not sure where in John 6 it talks about the Eucherist.

Second of all, I’m to old to care about if people like my tone or not.

And the wanting children to be Catholic, it’s really something you promise the priest when you get married.

I truly do feel sorry for people who do not let their hearts talk to them, considering that’s really where God is and if you listen, he talks quite clear.

I do know the Catechist, I became a Catholic as an adult. I have the cathecism book down stairs, shall I retrieve it. Besides, the Cathecism is the CHURCHES laws, not necessarily Gods. We, as catholics end up emphasising so much on what the “church” teaches as apposed to what the Bible and God wants us to know. The church changes laws as according to society. Don’t even tell me they don’t. Do you still have meatless Fridays? They did years ago, not just during lent, all year. And where in the bible does it say to pray the rosary? Where in the bible does it say to bless yourself? AND when you recieve the Eucherist, do you touch it?? The church at one time wouldn’t have let you touch it for anything.

O’course, I also believe in faith. I have faith that God would lead me in the direction he wants me to go. How do you know that God didn’t lead me to my husband to bring him closer to God?? You don’t know the big plan. And I really do feel sorry for you if you have a check list of everything you “think” your spouse should be. Simply because when we get down to it, we are people. We aren’t perfect. And you will be dissapointed at some point. Only one perfect person walked the earth, right?

 

[agapewolf]

First of all, your not married? Then how can you relate to any of this?

John 6? Do you mean John 7, Feast of the Taberncacle? I’m not sure where in John 6 it talks about the Eucherist.

Second of all, I’m to old to care about if people like my tone or not.

And the wanting children to be Catholic, it’s really something you promise the priest when you get married.

I truly do feel sorry for people who do not let their hearts talk to them, considering that’s really where God is and if you listen, he talks quite clear.

I do know the Catechist, I became a Catholic as an adult. I have the cathecism book down stairs, shall I retrieve it. Besides, the Cathecism is the CHURCHES laws, not necessarily Gods. We, as catholics end up emphasising so much on what the “church” teaches as apposed to what the Bible and God wants us to know. The church changes laws as according to society. Don’t even tell me they don’t. Do you still have meatless Fridays? They did years ago, not just during lent, all year. And where in the bible does it say to pray the rosary? Where in the bible does it say to bless yourself? AND when you recieve the Eucherist, do you touch it?? The church at one time wouldn’t have let you touch it for anything.

O’course, I also believe in faith. I have faith that God would lead me in the direction he wants me to go. How do you know that God didn’t lead me to my husband to bring him closer to God?? You don’t know the big plan. And I really do feel sorry for you if you have a check list of everything you “think” your spouse should be. Simply because when we get down to it, we are people. We aren’t perfect. And you will be dissapointed at some point. Only one perfect person walked the earth, right?

Hmmm…where to start.

I can relate plenty as working for the church for 10+ years. People walk by my office every day wanting to tell me about their broken marriages, the adultery of the spouses, or the heartbreak of their children leaving the church. Friends in ministry that are going through marriage prep and marital issues share very deeply with me about what is bothering them. Just as priests can give counsel, so can single lay people. DO NOT TELL ME that I can’t relate. I can relate plenty, even more so because I have an objective view of things.

Go read your Bible JOHN 6. you must eat my flesh and drink my blood or have no life within you…Jesus says over and over and over again.

The Catechism is NOT the church’s laws. CANON LAW is. The catechism is the teachings of Christ through the church. the Doctrine of faith does not nor ever will change. Morality is an objective truth. Faith is an objective truth. the discipline and the practice of the faith change (such as meatless Fridays). And speaking of old disciplines, did you know that mixed marriages use to not be celebrated at a wedding in the church? It was so discouraged that it took place in the sacristy with 2 witnesses.

Stop accusing and start learning before taking such tone, because the forums call for charity, so maybe you should care.

My checklist for a future spouse is that he is a practicing Catholic. Don’t feel sorry for me, because this is the what is the highest priority for me. It is encouraged by the church.

 

[cmmamula]

Hmmm…where to start.

I can relate plenty as working for the church for 10+ years. People walk by my office every day wanting to tell me about their broken marriages, the adultery of the spouses, or the heartbreak of their children leaving the church. Friends in ministry that are going through marriage prep and marital issues share very deeply with me about what is bothering them. Just as priests can give counsel, so can single lay people. DO NOT TELL ME that I can’t relate. I can relate plenty, even more so because I have an objective view of things.

Go read your Bible JOHN 6. you must eat my flesh and drink my blood or have no life within you…Jesus says over and over and over again.

The Catechism is NOT the church’s laws. CANON LAW is. The catechism is the teachings of Christ through the church. the Doctrine of faith does not nor ever will change. Morality is an objective truth. Faith is an objective truth. the discipline and the practice of the faith change (such as meatless Fridays). And speaking of old disciplines, did you know that mixed marriages use to not be celebrated at a wedding in the church? It was so discouraged that it took place in the sacristy with 2 witnesses.

Stop accusing and start learning before taking such tone, because the forums call for charity, so maybe you should care.

My checklist for a future spouse is that he is a practicing Catholic. Don’t feel sorry for me, because this is the what is the highest priority for me. It is encouraged by the church.

NO YOU CAN’T RELATE! Just because you work around these people doesn’t make you know what they go through. And just because a couple are both Catholic doesn’t mean that they recieve some sorta special reward of never being tempted. I know many DIVORCED Catholics and one divorced because their husband decided he was GAY! So don’t tell me that the stuff you witness is only mixed marriages. Give me a break.

If that would have been the case with mixed marraiges, then I guess I wouldn’t be Catholic today. And because they change this stuff to meet societies needs, doesn’t make it right. If you believe in something and believe that’s what God would have wanted, then you shouldn’t change. The Church changes to make money.

I will go read my bible and look for that, but for now, I have a family to take care of and preperations to make for the morning.

And I DO feel sorry for you, because I think you are a very lonely person who really does judge others. I think that you think you are beyond others because you work in the church. You set yourself up for heartache if you put so much faith in a person because of their religion. People like you who make me doubt my religion. Notice, not my faith in God. And don’t tell me you can’t have faith in God without being Catholic.

My tone won’t change, it’s who I am. Last I checked the country I live in still had freedom of speech. Last I checked this was all written, so you may have you panties in a bunch for no reason. You seem to be having an issue with someone doubting what you believe, because down deep, you question it yourself.

 

[DJgang]

The most hard, most difficult thing would be openess to life.

Bottom line.

Everything else can be dealt with, however, if your spouse wants to be in control of how/when/where/blah, blah, blah about your children…that’s a big problem Resentment can harbor. Fear of even having sex to begin with can happen and the marriage will suffer, trust me.

It’s easy to get along with differences in your faith, really…but this part can be a breaker!

 

[jmcrae]

I am aware that there are 7 sacraments in the Catholic Faith. Your post refered to wanting kids babptized Catholic so the could recieve grace in baptism. Since the Catholic Church recognizes Lutheran, and several other protestant baptisms as valid, do they not convey grace as well?

Minus the ability to receive any of the other six Sacraments, unless they convert to the Catholic faith at some point.

I imagine that this kids will predominantly attend one church, but I will certainly encourage them to understand and learn about both faiths, and my husband and I are working on ways to incorporate traditions from both of our families and faiths into our home. I certainly am not going to hide one parents faith from them or act as if it is less important.

This seems like a sure recipe to instill in them the heresy of Indifferentism - the idea that all religions are equally okay, and that there is no such thing as a true religion; it’s all just people’s opinions.

 

[chevalier]

Some issues in moral philosophy. Theological differences weren’t as immediately bad to handle as the approach to certain moral matters, although the different theology was a sting.

 

[Lil_Cat]

One more thing.

Are you guys sure about what you are saying? We are doing all of our paperwork for a convalidation with a canon lawyer and a member of the marriage tribunal. She specifically looked me in my eyes and said that the Catholic Church would never tell me not to teach my religion to my child, right after she made it clear that my husband was the only one that is responsible for theaching future children the Catholic faith. Is she wrong and all of you are correct? Do I need to go to the Bishop and tell him she’s not telling me the truth? I assume canon lawyers know what they’re talking about, but if you guys are telling everyone something different I should be made aware.

 

[masuwerte]

One thought I’d like to contribute is this: just because you marry a person with a certain set of beliefs, doesn’t mean those beliefs will never change. My own wife was pretty much a lukewarm Catholic when we were first married, and it was only a couple of years later that she became more devout. Likewise, one could marry a practicing Catholic who later decides not to practice so much.

BTW, I’m Episcopalian.

 

[masuwerte]

Minus the ability to receive any of the other six Sacraments, unless they convert to the Catholic faith at some point.

Does Catholicism also consider marriage between two non-Catholic Christians sacramental?

 

[Lady_Bug]

One thought I’d like to contribute is this: just because you marry a person with a certain set of beliefs, doesn’t mean those beliefs will never change. My own wife was pretty much a lukewarm Catholic when we were first married, and it was only a couple of years later that she became more devout. Likewise, one could marry a practicing Catholic who later decides not to practice so much.

BTW, I’m Episcopalian.

That’s true LOL - but doesn’t someone base their decision to marry someone on how they are NOW, versus what they might become or not become?

I mean, I’ve seen this argument before - but for me it doesn’t seem strong (no offense LOL).

 

[agapewolf]

NO YOU CAN’T RELATE! Just because you work around these people doesn’t make you know what they go through. And just because a couple are both Catholic doesn’t mean that they recieve some sorta special reward of never being tempted. I know many DIVORCED Catholics and one divorced because their husband decided he was GAY! So don’t tell me that the stuff you witness is only mixed marriages. Give me a break.

If that would have been the case with mixed marraiges, then I guess I wouldn’t be Catholic today. And because they change this stuff to meet societies needs, doesn’t make it right. If you believe in something and believe that’s what God would have wanted, then you shouldn’t change. The Church changes to make money.

I will go read my bible and look for that, but for now, I have a family to take care of and preperations to make for the morning.

And I DO feel sorry for you, because I think you are a very lonely person who really does judge others. I think that you think you are beyond others because you work in the church. You set yourself up for heartache if you put so much faith in a person because of their religion. People like you who make me doubt my religion. Notice, not my faith in God. And don’t tell me you can’t have faith in God without being Catholic.

My tone won’t change, it’s who I am. Last I checked the country I live in still had freedom of speech. Last I checked this was all written, so you may have you panties in a bunch for no reason. You seem to be having an issue with someone doubting what you believe, because down deep, you question it yourself.

Again, your tone is uncalled for, as well as some of your accusations and analogies. A free country it may be, but this forum calls for more refined and charitable tone. If this is who you are, you won’t get very far.

I never said all those problems were from mixed marriages. Go read what I said again. I said I CAN RELATE Because I hear and understand real stories every day. Yes I can relate. I know very well from an objective standpoint the different issues going on. I do not think I am beyond others…I have never ever said such. Dear heart, It is you who is taking this to heart. Again, I said simply my priorities were to be to share the Eucharist with my husband. You said you don’t have that as a priority. This is the 3rd time I’ve stated it this simply and it is just simple fact.

The fact that you admit that you would leave the church because you wouldn’t get a full church wedding because you were marrying someone non-Catholic, again, speaks of your priorities. Where in the world do you get that the church changes to make money? What is this from? What have they changed? Again, you are flying off the cuff here with no research about anything you are talking about.

I have not, nor will I ever “judge” someone as you are saying. Judgement is saying that I know someone’s heart and that they are condemned. I have said no such thing.

And where do I have an issue with someone doubting what I believe? This makes absolutely no sense. I’m just fine where I am really. I’m sorry this is making you so upset…perhaps its bringing up things that are bothering you.

 

[Julianna]

My Baptist mother and Catholic father were married in the Catholic Church in 1956. They were married almost 50 yrs when dad passed away. My mother made a promise to God that she would raise us kids Catholic. My Baptist grandmother got the vapors

It was my Baptist mother who asked questions and saw to it that each of us kept our sacraments and attended catechism class. We did go to her church on occasion, but Mass was a must, period. Mother is almost 80 and never converted. She kept her promise.

My sister has been happily married to a Methodist for 27 yrs.
My brother is happily married to a Pentacostal for 18 yrs.
I married a Catholic. My sisters son was raised Catholic. My brother does not have any children.

Their strategy was not to listen to anyone in the “family”, as both were at them over how we were going to be raised.

When my dad took my red-headed/freckled mom to meet his parents (direct from Italy and Catholic), she said, “Hi, y’all”, and they got their rosary out and fainted. Mom wasn’t Italian, first cardinal sin, mom wasn’t from Massachusetts, second cardinal sin…and of course…not Catholic

Meanwhile in a small southern town, my Baptist grandmother was sittin’ on the front poa’ch, readin’ her Bible and sippin’ some sweet tea waiting to meet my dad for the first time. The family all knew that her daughter was marryin’ a “yankee”, “an eye-talian” and “Catholic” Grandmother was afraid dad was going to drive up in a black sedan, in a striped silk suit with a white carnation, carrying a violin case and the Pope would be in the backseat.

Didn’t happen. Religion was not an issue and we all turned out fine.

 

[cmmamula]

Ummm, agape are you psychic that you can tell what tone I have. And just so you know, you haven’t brought up anything that I didn’t already know. I do realize what the Catholic church does. Your problem is, like most Catholics, you have blinders on. You only see what they tell you to see. And just because we hear, doesn’t always mean we understand. And this topic was based on mixed marriages, and you did state that you knew you wanted a Catholic man because of what you did hear and witness. I simply said that just because they are a Catholic doesn’t give them special powers to never be tempted or have problems within the marriage.

So tell me, why do you think the church started letting mixed marriages have a ceremony? Probably because they were loosing perishioners. Or maybe, back then women stayed home, which meant the man was the bread winner, which meant that the man probably had a lot of say were his money was going to go. And if he wasn’t Catholic, and the treated him badly and belittled him and a woman he loved by not allowing them to have a ceremony, he probably wouldn’t want to give money to that church. Watch how many things the Catholic church changes. What bothers me most, is the Catholic church makes these “rules” based on the bible. Well why would you change something that the bible told you to do. Heck, why would you change something you believe so strongly in. It’s things like that that makes me question the church also.

What makes me think that money has anything to do with it. Really, Catholics are knows for being the richest church in the world. How many bishops have numerous homes. I about choked when I found out how much our priest made, $40,000. There are families who don’t live on that. Let a lone a man who lives in a house paid for by the parish along with electric and heat. And that 40,000 was made known probably about 5 or 6 years ago, I’m sure it’s went up since then. Geesh, what makes me think that money has anything to do with the Catholic church decisions, I just don’t know.

Again, you didn’t bring anything out that I didn’t already no. Don’t think so big of yourself.

And yes, I probably would have left the Catholic church if they made me feel like I was doing something wrong for marrying someone I love. I didn’t have to get married, I got married because I love him. Just because you leave the church, doesn’t mean you leave God.

 

[kage_ar]

.

So tell me, why do you think the church started letting mixed marriages have a ceremony? .

Could you please explain this statement.

Thank you.