Cohabitation wha?

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Tlaloc:
Actually we are getting married. We discussed it for some time but events had been to chaotic.

However before you get too excited we’re getting married mostly to gain the benefits (such as putting her on my healthcare) but also as a recognition that we celebrate our relationship and expect to be together for some time. We also have an open relationship so you really have any number of attributes to be appalled at. Take your pick.
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What does an “open” relationship mean?
 
I read in your other thread that you haven’t really talked about religion with your girlfriend, I suggest you have a really nice, long, discussion about it with her before tying the knot. (You’ve been dating for 2 years and you don’t know her religious beliefs yet?!?! Haha, I ususally find those out before dating or on the first date at the very latest, but I’m weird like that.) It’s best to know how you guys plan on raising your kids. Will she mind if they are raised Catholic? Will she be okay with using NFP instead of artificial birth control? Things like this are a big deal so that means you have 5 years to have “the talk.”

Anyway, best of luck! Taking things slow is always good so don’t feel bad for being gun-shy.
 
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Tlaloc:
We also have an open relationship so you really have any number of attributes to be appalled at. Take your pick.
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Not really appalled, but I am sure that your “open relationship” possesses these definition attributes:

**a·mor·phous **adj., defn;

  1. *]Lacking definite form; shapeless.
    *]Of no particular type; anomalous.
    *]Lacking organization; formless.
    *]Lacking distinct crystalline structure.
 
Tantum ergo:
Well, good luck to you and your future wife and congratulations.
May God bless you both. I hope that you will have a long and happy life together. 🙂
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That’s very sweet of you.
 
Cohabitation is when you live together, although it often serves as an euphemism for adultery. But there is difference. Cohabitation doesn’t necessarily mean adultery is taking place. Adultery is a grave matter. Cohabition per se is not.

Of course, one still needs to ask himself why he/she wants to do that.

Scandal is an issue, but people who won’t believe you that you don’t sleep together despite your assertions will likely be scandalised by many things including certain Bible passages. That hardly makes your responsible for their impressions, at least in my humble opinion. You must bear in mind I’m as infallible as the Pope… 's parrot. 😉
 
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chevalier:
Cohabitation is when you live together, although it often serves as an euphemism for adultery. But there is difference. Cohabitation doesn’t necessarily mean adultery is taking place. Adultery is a grave matter. Cohabition per se is not.

Of course, one still needs to ask himself why he/she wants to do that.

Scandal is an issue, but people who won’t believe you that you don’t sleep together despite your assertions will likely be scandalised by many things including certain Bible passages. That hardly makes your responsible for their impressions, at least in my humble opinion. You must bear in mind I’m as infallible as the Pope… 's parrot. 😉
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I think cohabitation might also fall under the “occasion to sin” (ie putting yourself in a situation which would make sinning easier) which we are also called to avoid.
 
. Cohabitation doesn’t necessarily mean adultery is taking place. Adultery is a grave matter. Cohabition per se is not.

Scandal is an issue, but people who won’t believe you that you don’t sleep together despite your assertions will likely be scandalised by many things including certain Bible passages. That hardly makes your responsible for their impressions, at least in my humble opinion. You must bear in mind I’m as infallible as the Pope… 's parrot. 😉

I agree with this post! Everyone is assuming that a couple living together is having relations! We should remember that there is only one judge to face and “HE ain’t here”. My mother tells me of many couples her age(60-70) living together for companionship and financial reasons. Why are we so quick to judge younger couples? I work with a girl who’s been in a celibate relationship for 10 months now. There is no reason for me not to believe her. I am NOT naive and consider myself far less judgemental than most people here.
If we all looked over our lives, at one time or another we have all done something against our faith( myself included) and God has given us forgiveness. Let us remember that and be more charitable toward our fellow man.
 
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Katie1723:
. Cohabitation doesn’t necessarily mean adultery is taking place. Adultery is a grave matter. .
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I think a clarification of terms is called for here:

Adultery is sexual activity taking place between at least one married person outside of those marital bonds. These people do not of necessity cohabit with one another.

Cohabitation is defined by The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language: 1. To live together in a sexual relationship, especially when not legally married.
Scandal is an issue, but people who won’t believe you that you don’t sleep together despite your assertions will likely be scandalised by many things including certain Bible passages.
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Please don’t be ridiculous.
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Katie1723:
I agree with this post! Everyone is assuming that a couple living together is having relations! We should remember that there is only one judge to face and “HE ain’t here”. My mother tells me of many couples her age(60-70) living together for companionship and financial reasons. Why are we so quick to judge younger couples? I work with a girl who’s been in a celibate relationship for 10 months now. There is no reason for me not to believe her. I am NOT naive and consider myself far less judgemental than most people here.
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Well happy canonization to you - the fact remains that there is a great deal of difference between elderly people who are housemates for financial, health or companionship reasons vs. two young college age kids with raging hormones vs someone in their mid 20’s and 30’s who seeking help with the rent moved in with a boyfriend and wants everyone to believe that it is not a near occasion of sin. I think one needs some common sense in making judgements and in facing reality.
 
If there is no sex, then it cant be “cohabitation” now then can it?
 
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Argh:
If there is no sex, then it cant be “cohabitation” now then can it?
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Correct. Just like at college when you have two room mates, you are not cohabiting with them.
 
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Argh:
If there is no sex, then it cant be “cohabitation” now then can it?
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Correct. Just like at college when you have two room mates, you are not cohabiting with them.
 
Please don’t be ridiculous.
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The same. Please explain.
Cohabitation is defined by The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language: 1. To live together in a sexual relationship, especially when not legally married.
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The etymology is different. The dictionary is simply listing a common usage meaning without much regard to how the word originated and what the first and intended meaning was. Cohabitation, co-habitatio, co-living, so to say. Living together. The sex stuff is added on top of this by virtue of common association. Hence the confusion.
I think cohabitation might also fall under the “occasion to sin” (ie putting yourself in a situation which would make sinning easier) which we are also called to avoid.
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What level of occasion to sin qualifies? After all, we aren’t forbidden from going to the beach on the grounds of occasion for mental adultery, are we?
 
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Tlaloc:
We aren’t exclusively intimate with each other.
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:eek: :eek: :eek: You are right,I have barely scratched the surface, I am fearful for you.God Bless
 
For the benefit of others, an open relationship is one where both parties have ‘freed’ each other to commit adultery, supposedly with no uneasy feelings. Sometimes it may not be clear to both parties, however, that it is in fact an open relationship.
 
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Philip76:
For the benefit of others, an open relationship is one where both parties have ‘freed’ each other to commit adultery, supposedly with no uneasy feelings. Sometimes it may not be clear to both parties, however, that it is in fact an open relationship.
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So in effect, they use each other and other people for sexual gratification and overtly treat the person and other people as objects with no commitment and apparently devoid of love:confused: I am going to offer a Rosary up and I ask all other poster to do the same.God Bless
 
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chevalier:
The etymology is different. The dictionary is simply listing a common usage meaning without much regard to how the word originated and what the first and intended meaning was. Cohabitation, co-habitatio, co-living, so to say. Living together. The sex stuff is added on top of this by virtue of common association. Hence the confusion.
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The meanings of words change through time; i.e., gay, discriminating, the dictionary gives what is a clear understanding of how the word is used in today’s language.
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chevalier:
What level of occasion to sin qualifies? After all, we aren’t forbidden from going to the beach on the grounds of occasion for mental adultery, are we?
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I suggest that if you discuss this problem with your confessor he will advise you to give up going to the beach if you can’t mentally handle it.

Any good confessor will tell you that if you keep courting the occasion of sin, eventually you will obtain what you’ve been skirting.

You can dance, schmance and swivel around it - the facts are that with human nature being what it is, hormones and the young being where they are in growing up, any good confessor would tell a young healthy couple they are pretty much fooling themselves at worst and playing with fire at best.

You will note that although both priests and nuns are vowed to celibacy - the church does refrain from housing them together.
 
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Philip76:
For the benefit of others, an open relationship is one where both parties have ‘freed’ each other to commit adultery, supposedly with no uneasy feelings. Sometimes it may not be clear to both parties, however, that it is in fact an open relationship.
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Well I think you’d hear it bandied about a bit at the “will you respect me in the morning clubs” but the police and the social services will have a different version of how it often works out.
 
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chevalier:
The etymology is different. The dictionary is simply listing a common usage meaning without much regard to how the word originated and what the first and intended meaning was. Cohabitation, co-habitatio, co-living, so to say. Living together. The sex stuff is added on top of this by virtue of common association. Hence the confusion.
Click to expand...
The meanings of words change through time; i.e., gay, discriminating, the dictionary gives what is a clear understanding of how the word is used in today’s language.
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chevalier:
What level of occasion to sin qualifies? After all, we aren’t forbidden from going to the beach on the grounds of occasion for mental adultery, are we?
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I suggest that if you discuss this problem with your confessor he will advise you to give up going to the beach if you can’t mentally handle it.

Any good confessor will tell you that if you keep courting the occasion of sin, eventually you will obtain what you’ve been skirting.

You can dance, schmance and swivel around it - the facts are that with human nature being what it is, hormones and the young being where they are in growing up, any good confessor would tell a young healthy couple they are pretty much fooling themselves at worst and playing with fire at best.

You will note that although both priests and nuns are vowed to celibacy - the church does refrain from housing them together.
 
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