Cohabitation wha?

[kmktexas]

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=39627

see post #7, should mentioned that, sorry…

She claims she doesnt want kids and instead wants to adopt. She understands that I would have to raise either Catholic.

We havent talked about birth control yet…I myself am still working that out.

Getting off topic here but…

I don’t think you can get validly married in the Church (or with dispensation) if one of you intends not to have children at all. It is nice that she would like to adopt but this doesn’t sound like the “open to life” mindset that the Church requires when you make those vows.

 

[Olympia]

To TIALOClease come back to this forum and post your thoughts in about, say, two or three years from now.

AT about the 3 year point, one of the parties usually wants “a deeper commitment.” The other party doesn’t, and the whole thing is over. EXCEPT for the heartbreak, guilt, fighting, etc. Not to mention the scandal, sin, and the somewhat soiled reputations of both parties.

So it’s back to square one, older, sadder and wiser, and. . . . . .
slightly more shopworn.

White gown? Not for you! Try this, it’s off-white.

 

[jimmy]

Tlaloc:

Actually we are getting married. We discussed it for some time but events had been to chaotic.

However before you get too excited we’re getting married mostly to gain the benefits (such as putting her on my healthcare) but also as a recognition that we celebrate our relationship and expect to be together for some time. We also have an open relationship so you really have any number of attributes to be appalled at. Take your pick.

You only intend to be together for some time? Not until death? And an open relationship. Quite a commitment you got there.

 

[Argh]

kmktexas:

Getting off topic here but…

I don’t think you can get validly married in the Church (or with dispensation) if one of you intends not to have children at all. It is nice that she would like to adopt but this doesn’t sound like the “open to life” mindset that the Church requires when you make those vows.

Yes, I know, but ty for the concern.

I really dont believe her; she loves kids way too much.

 

[tom.wineman]

Scott_Lafrance:

Correction, fornication is consentual sex between to non-married partners. Adultery is sexual relations between two people who are not married to each other, but one or both are married to someone else.

Whatever the circumstances you are still hell bound

 

[Tlaloc]

Lisa4Catholics:

So in effect, they use each other and other people for sexual gratification and overtly treat the person and other people as objects with no commitment and apparently devoid of love I am going to offer a Rosary up and I ask all other poster to do the same.God Bless

Ah, Lisa, my little judgement-monkey. I can always count on you to approach a topic from a position of self righteous indignation.

My relationship is not devoid of love. You confound love and possessiveness. Unfortunate but common. I love my girlfriend as a partner. A good and close friend with whom I can share anything. But I don’t feel the need to jealously prevent her from having male friends or even intimacies with other men or women if she feels the desire. And that is reciprocated.

She is not my possession but my equal. I do not control her, nor do I want to. nor would I accept her controlling me. Each of us appreciates the other deeply.

 

[Tlaloc]

Olympia:

To TIALOClease come back to this forum and post your thoughts in about, say, two or three years from now.

AT about the 3 year point, one of the parties usually wants “a deeper commitment.” The other party doesn’t, and the whole thing is over. EXCEPT for the heartbreak, guilt, fighting, etc. Not to mention the scandal, sin, and the somewhat soiled reputations of both parties.

So it’s back to square one, older, sadder and wiser, and. . . . . .
slightly more shopworn.

Life’s a journey, not a destination. If it moves in circles that’s fine.

White gown? Not for you! Try this, it’s off-white.

I think she plans to wear a dark gown but I really don’t care for tradition so if she plans to wear white I certainly won’t stop her.

 

[Tlaloc]

jimmy:

You only intend to be together for some time? Not until death? And an open relationship. Quite a commitment you got there.

People change. It’s fundamentally unrealistic to go into marriage believing it will last forever. Rather than a promise of eternity marriage is a celebration of what you have now.

 

[Argh]

You’re both whores. There, I said it. And I realize you dont care, but i just had to do it.

---

Sometimes I just gotta build a really…big…bomb

 

[rayne89]

Argh:

You’re both whores. There, I said it. And I realize you dont care, but i just had to do it.

---

Sometimes I just gotta build a really…big…bomb

So much for christian charity huh? Wow you’re a great example Christ’s love. Love the sinner hate the sin. You’ll cause just so many conversions with that attitude. :banghead:

 

[Shiann]

Argh:

You’re both whores. There, I said it. And I realize you dont care, but i just had to do it.

<a href='http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb008_ZSYYYYYYYYUS' target='_blank'><img src='http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/36/36_5_7.gif' border=0></a>

Cut to the chase huh!?

 

[Lisa4Catholics]

Tlaloc:

Ah, Lisa, my little judgement-monkey. I can always count on you to approach a topic from a position of self righteous indignation.

My relationship is not devoid of love. You confound love and possessiveness. Unfortunate but common. I love my girlfriend as a partner. A good and close friend with whom I can share anything. But I don’t feel the need to jealously prevent her from having male friends or even intimacies with other men or women if she feels the desire. And that is reciprocated.

She is not my possession but my equal. I do not control her, nor do I want to. nor would I accept her controlling me. Each of us appreciates the other deeply.

You apparently, do not know what love is:nope: Love deals with respecting yourself and others including that your body is not just a tool for your gratification or others.Love is deeper than that.You can call me a judgement-monkey if you wish that is okay.You need to respect yourself before you can respect anyone else and there is more to you and your girlfriend than your sexuality.God Bless

 

[Shiann]

Argh:

You’re both whores. There, I said it. And I realize you dont care, but i just had to do it.

---

Sometimes I just gotta build a really…big…bomb

Cut right to the chase huh!?

 

[Tlaloc]

jimmy:

You only intend to be together for some time? Not until death? And an open relationship. Quite a commitment you got there.

People change. It’s fundamentally unrealistic to go into marriage believing it will last forever. Rather than a promise of eternity marriage is a celebration of what you have now.

 

[felra]

Argh:

You’re both whores. There, I said it. And I realize you dont care, but i just had to do it.​

Sometimes I just gotta build a really…big…bomb

I apologize to **Tlaloc **on behalf of the Catholic Christians on this forumfor this person’s uncharitable response.

 

[Tlaloc]

Lisa4Catholics:

You apparently, do not know what love is:nope:

But I’m sure you’ll tell me…

Love deals with respecting yourself and others including that your body is not just a tool for your gratification or others.

No, not just a tool for gratification but that is one of it’s uses.

Love is deeper than that.

Possessiveness and jealousy isn’t deep Lisa, it’s a base and shallow way of relating to an equal.

You need to respect yourself before you can respect anyone else and there is more to you and your girlfriend than your sexuality.God Bless

Of course there’s more to our relationship than sexuality, thats precisely why we can have an open relationship. Since sex is not the sum total of what makes a relationship it doesn’t have to be restricted to the relationship.

 

[lovesfall]

Lisa4Catholics:

So in effect, they use each other and other people for sexual gratification and overtly treat the person and other people as objects with no commitment and apparently devoid of love I am going to offer a Rosary up and I ask all other poster to do the same.God Bless

My daughter told me the terminology that is used today is “friends with benefits”…:bigyikes:

I will join you in offering the Rosary up for all those misguided souls.

God Bless

Sandy

 

[Argh]

I am sorry for what I said.

As I look back on my post, I really cant believe I would say such an awful thing. There really isnt any excuse for that, especially here, on this forum.

 

[Tlaloc]

Lisa4Catholics:

You apparently, do not know what love is:nope:

But I’m sure you’ll tell me…

Love deals with respecting yourself and others including that your body is not just a tool for your gratification or others.

No, not just a tool for gratification but that is one of it’s uses.

Love is deeper than that.

Possessiveness and jealousy isn’t deep Lisa, it’s a base and shallow way of relating to an equal.

You need to respect yourself before you can respect anyone else and there is more to you and your girlfriend than your sexuality.God Bless

Of course there’s more to our relationship than sexuality, thats precisely why we can have an open relationship. Since sex is not the sum total of what makes a relationship it doesn’t have to be restricted to the relationship.

 

[Lisa4Catholics]

Tlaloc:

But I’m sure you’ll tell me…

No, not just a tool for gratification but that is one of it’s uses.

Possessiveness and jealousy isn’t deep Lisa, it’s a base and shallow way of relating to an equal.

Of course there’s more to our relationship than sexuality, thats precisely why we can have an open relationship. Since sex is not the sum total of what makes a relationship it doesn’t have to be restricted to the relationship.

Sex is beautiful and gratifying within its proper context-marriage.Poosessivieness and jealousy has nothing to do with it,committment and respect and true love for yourself and your girlfriend.I obviously will not understand your worldview,but I will pray for both of you.I know people who think like you and live like you and they are miserable and pessimistic.God Bless