Courtship and twenty-something Catholics

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ExtraordinaryGrace

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I’m a twenty-something year old catholic who is dedicated to Holy Mother Church and Her teachings. I’ve been wanting to start a group at my parish but don’t want it to turn into a singles meet-up obscuring true fellowship. How are other young single catholics going about life while silently, or not so silently, waiting for the next phase in life to start?
 
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Years ago, the was a group at our parish that used to say the rosary, all of the mysteries, every Friday night. The group was for 21-30 year old Catholics, but anyone was free to join in. However, it did not begin until 9 pm.

It was well attended. And certainly not a social/singles meet up, although I believe some of them may have gotten together to eat afterward.
 
Right now just trying to get through school, cutting spending, investing, and reading. My GPA is abysmal right now and getting Summa Cum Laude will be very difficult now. The way I see it I just want to focus on my faith, establishing my career, and saving as much money as possible. Now that I am old I need to get my life together lol.

As far as courtship, until I am financially stable I don’t think I am fit for a relationship.
 
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Now that sounds like an ideal Friday night. Where is this today lol.
 
I’m old and past that phase of life myself, but before COVID happened, I noticed my local church had a monthly event for the local area Catholic singles in their 20s. They would have Adoration, some prayers and songs, and then a priest would give a talk. Afterwards they went out as a group for pizza or snacks. Although the group was only at my church once a month, they had other meetings and outings elsewhere during the rest of the month.

I attended a couple of the talks because they happened right at the end of the regularly scheduled Adoration time for the parish, so there would usually be a couple of us older people who happened to be going to Adoration and then just stuck around for the talk (we did not go to the restaurant afterwards). There were usually about 40 young people there.
 
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A group devoted to praying the full rosary would be rather interesting. A friend of mine told me when she was dating in the 60s her parish being very vibrant with large families had late services and devotions on the weekends to keep the young people dating out of trouble.
 
I attended, then briefly ran, a “catholic singles” group. We advertised it in Church bulletins. It was well-attended.

The first event was a Saturday evening mass followed by dinner at a local restaurant.

The only “issue” with something like the rosary is that some people want to get involved so they can meet nice people to date - which is very hard if all you’re doing is praying. The other issue is when you have 12 men show up and 3 women - or the reverse. Oh well. It happens.

I met my wife that way. Next year is 20 years we’re married.
 
A good acquaintance of mine recently stated that the biggest scam among the millennial generation is telling them to “wait” for marriage. What exactly is financially stable? Do you have student loans? I’m asking because many of my non catholic friends from HS are now married and having children many of them without college degrees and they are truly blessed by their children and marriages. I feel like Catholics are more focused on temporal aspects of life and ignore the supernatural. None of my catholic friends under 27 are married and probably will never get married at this rate.
 
To me financially stable is no debt (credit card, student loans), gainfully employed, and a decent sized nest egg. I should also add I’m pretty old now so I really need catch up on those things.
 
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I understand. I recently paid off my minuscule student loans and refuse to get a credit card as it is compound interest and therefore usury which is anti-christian. Embracing christian poverty has helped me immensely with my outlook on finances. Meaning I don’t consider what I don’t have but do and work within those boundaries. Praying about my vocation rather than willing it has also helped me put my career boundaries within limit and brought overall peace to my life. Not to say that a vocation is always moderately priced.
 
My brain is fully formed and I am behind my peers so I consider myself old.
 
Well the average Catholic marriage age is 24 so by that standard you were “ancient” lol. I’m considering not even marrying now since I am past the average age.

I don’t have that kind of influence in my parish unfortunately 😦
 
Stop, stop, STOP! Do NOT compare yourself to others in your peer group - I heard a great sermon about how the devil likes it when we compare ourselves to others, particularly when we do so unfavorably, since it makes us despair.

Run your own race!
 
I think it would be beautiful if a group of prayerful people came together and were able to find their spouse. It would truly be a graceful way of a prayer being answered and would also importantly establish the need to pray together in marriage which is what I am looking for as a deep faithful.
 
maybe you need to find a new parish. You are not obligated to stay in a spiritual place that no longer suits you. God always has a family for us that will meet our needs physically and spiritually.
 
Yes, but it’s hard to actually get to know someone without having some ability to interact - hence why a dinner is IMHO a great idea. Want to do that, after the rosary? Hey, that’s OK too, but some ability to interact with others is very different than just announcing the decades.
 
Well the rosary is a prayer of devotion and indulgences so that’s never a bad situation for faithful catholics to come together for. Social interaction afterwards would only be natural but not obligatory in my case as some people maybe would like to pair off and have their own moments with each other. Seeing someone devoted to the rosary is a great way to dispel if they are a right soul for you, if you’re interested.
 
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