Cursillo

[gh4]

Well, since you can only go once in a lifetime, I’ll never know what it is that makes it wonderful! But that’s ok and I’m fine with that.

I think I was the only single person at this retreat (widow for 30+yrs) and there was LOT of the talk geared towards the married persons. The women there all had husbands who had made their Cursillos first.
Perhaps a cursillo for singles would be a good thing. And one for night owls!! I know that will not happen, you just can’t get that “specialized” in this.

I had a wonderful RCIA class and honestly many RCIA people really do know and understand the Catholic faith better than those who had 12 years of CCD or Catholic Education. Getting all of that as an adult can be a very good thing.

And no, these talks are not really Catholicism 101. To be quite honest, I’d have to read my notes to even tell you what they were about, in this short time I’ve forgotten the bazillion subjects. They seem never ending, 5 a day I think and interspersed with talks form a deacon and a priest. Probably 7 0r 8 talks a day. And then there’s mass and confession and the rosary and the Stations of the Cross.

You know, if you took this weekend and made it into 4 or even 5 days, and gave people some space and time to themselves, it would be far more doable. The palanca was given and we were never even given privacy to read this stuff, some of it from friends who said things that might make someone emotional. Not all of us like to burst into tears with an audience.

The leader of our giving team was about 6’4" and had this bell. By the time I was there for 24 hours I wanted to tear that bell apart and toss the parts into the desert.
And what some of this is about… being treated like a grade school kid. That dang bell, the guards who accompanied me to go and take some advil, the guards at the doors so no one went outside during potty breaks. Yup, that’s part of the distaste for me. If I’m an adult, I’m old enough to find my room, take my pills and come back to the meeting room.

 

[tafan]

Sounds like yours was terrible. That’s so depressing. I’m so sorry for you. I have some pals who run Cursillos and to be quite honest, like others have said before, it all depends on who is running these things. Sometimes people get caught up in the program or themselves and forget to actually care for the people. There’s absolutely no excuse that they aren’t helping folks manage insulin levels when needed. It’s lazy and thoughtless. I probably wouldn’t have much to do with Cursillo if I experienced what you experienced.

It sounds like some misguided, militaristic retreat-ists ran your Cursillo. If I were you, I’d stick with Catholicism and pray that those folks might gain some perspective.

I am not really buying into this argument that “someof the Cursillo’s are just poorly run”. For two reasons,

1. if it is true, then it seems all the more important that the Cursillo organzation encourage more openess at the local level in order for people to better discern if it is a proper fit. Also, if everyone on this board, who is pro-cursillo, knows that there are good Cursillo weekends and bad Cursillo weekends, it would be fixed and not near as likely. I am sure there are some local mistakes here and there, but it cannot explain as much as is taken for granted.
2. It seems to me that too many of the features in question are just too common. Now people who find it to be a great weekend, either overlook these issues are actually like them. For example, the not driving to the event, yet being “free to leave” at any time. This is obviously not the case. There are lots of seemingly logistical reasons to justify not driving; but the root answer has to be, to maximize the likihood people won’t leave. Who wants to go through waht gh4 apparently went through, this way most people will just “sit it out”. The food issue seems to be very common (high carbs, sugar, etc). It comes up too often. It is easy to overlook, but it seems to me there is a definite purpose behind it. The "making posters"and other child-like activities, the reliance on emotional highs and lows (peaking with a high, the secrecy.

Look: if your spirituality needs a “emotional” boost, or that is what you respond to; it will likely seem like an amazing weekend; as it is precisely programmed, in much detail, to deliver on this front.
If, on the other hand, you like theological depth, meditative time/silent retreat; it is not for you.

Why can’t pro Cursillo people just admit this? They will say, it is not for everyone; but will not say why. So we are left to figure out the details of the weekend for ourselves, based on bits and pieces of information. I again refer one to my post #69, which seems more and more accurate to me.

I do not know of any other Catholic movement that will not give people the information ahead of time for discernment purposes.

 

[Jeremiah1278]

tafan, Cursillo folks can’t admit what you propose (that if you like theological depth and silent retreat, then Cursillo is not for you), because it’s just absolutely false. People who prefer those types of things can still enjoy and/or get a lot out of Cursillo. One reason for this truth is that people aren’t rigidly defined as either emotional/spiritual vs. theological/intellectual/reflective. Cursillo stimulates all of those, if you ask me. The fact that there may be a bit more of the emotional going on doesn’t mean that’s the focus of Cursillo. Rather, it could be a sign that The Emotional is made very separate from your other preferred encounters with the theological, and Cursillo is different because it taps that part of your humanity a bit more. But just because you prefer one sort of encounter doesn’t mean that you will not enjoy or benefit from a different sort.

Moreover, I just reject your basic point which seems to be that The Emotional is somehow irrelevant to one’s spirituality and search for Christ (and therefore, any program designed to address The Emotional is hooey and a waste of time for intellectual folks). Made in God’s image, we have all the tools to know Him. This includes the many emotions we have which can be very helpful in telling us about ourselves, our neighbor and God.

 

[DebChris]

… The palanca was given and we were never even given privacy to read this stuff, some of it from friends who said things that might make someone emotional. Not all of us like to burst into tears with an audience.

The leader of our giving team was about 6’4" and had this bell. By the time I was there for 24 hours I wanted to tear that bell apart and toss the parts into the desert.
And what some of this is about… being treated like a grade school kid. That dang bell, the guards who accompanied me to go and take some advil, the guards at the doors so no one went outside during potty breaks. Yup, that’s part of the distaste for me. If I’m an adult, I’m old enough to find my room, take my pills and come back to the meeting room.

This comes back to Jeremiah’s assessment. I really don’t remember the bells. Then again, I have also been on guided retreats in which we knew when talks were by the ringing of the bells. I do remember being given the needed privacy for the palanca, or at least as much as possible when everybody is staying/sleeping in the same gym. There was built in time and space, good food, and plenty of rest. Guards? I definitely do not remember any guards.

I remember somebody once asking why people who complete RCIA often know more about their Faith than cradle Catholics. The answer given was as cradle Catholics, we learn about our Faith as children. Instruction is not as in-depth as it would be for an adult. This question was asked long before I made Cursillo. By analogy, many naturalized citizens know more about the United States than some of us who were born here. We didn’t have to pass a test to become citizens. For cradle Catholics, our Faith may be nothing more than family tradition while you came to faith through desire.

 

[tafan]

tafan, Cursillo folks can’t admit what you propose (that if you like theological depth and silent retreat, then Cursillo is not for you), because it’s just absolutely false. People who prefer those types of things can still enjoy and/or get a lot out of Cursillo. One reason for this truth is that people aren’t rigidly defined as either emotional/spiritual vs. theological/intellectual/reflective. Cursillo stimulates all of those, if you ask me. The fact that there may be a bit more of the emotional going on doesn’t mean that’s the focus of Cursillo. Rather, it could be a sign that The Emotional is made very separate from your other preferred encounters with the theological, and Cursillo is different because it taps that part of your humanity a bit more. But just because you prefer one sort of encounter doesn’t mean that you will not enjoy or benefit from a different sort.

Moreover, I just reject your basic point which seems to be that The Emotional is somehow irrelevant to one’s spirituality and search for Christ (and therefore, any program designed to address The Emotional is hooey and a waste of time for intellectual folks). Made in God’s image, we have all the tools to know Him. This includes the many emotions we have which can be very helpful in telling us about ourselves, our neighbor and God.

As to the theological depth of Cursillo, I cannot say for sure. There have been many postings on that and other information on the internet, which seem convincing to me. Since none of the subject matter is available for preview, besides very high level descriptions.

As to the emotiional aspects being the focusof Cursillo, that seems a certainty to me, after reviewing all of the information and posts available.

If one will enjoy an emotional encounter is somewhat besides the point. If one will benefit is very much the point.
I do not have a basic point which says the emotional is irrelevant to one’s spirituality. I do have a basic point that different people respond to different types of spiritual “excersices”. God does not make us all the same, and the Church gives us a VERY wide variety of tools to enhance our spirituality. It is one of the strengths of the Church.
Do I think “The Emotional is hooey”: it depends on how it is done. I apologize for implying the emotional aspects are mutually exclusive to the intellectual. You have a point there.

But, it certainly seems like Cursillo is programmed to focus on the emotional.

gh4 seems like a very good example of how Cursillo’s approach is at times anti-thetical to its aims. Here we have someone who did not seem strong in her faith and was drifting away from the Church (with all due respect to gh4, I am not trying to diss you in any way). From that standpoint, everyone would say Cursillo would be the perfect thing for her. But it wasn’t, because the people encouraging her to go did not learn enough about her or have an open enough mind to see that its was an extreme mis-fit for her. And she was not given enough information to discern for herself if it would be a good match. And the end result: a person who just experienced the “final-straw”, so-to-speak, and is not not going back the the Church at all. Sad, and one wonders how often it happens.

I know this much, if (heaven forbid), I ever found myself in a situation where I had started to drift away from the faith; a Cursillo movement would not help me at all. I am pretty sure of that.

As I am now, someone seeking a means to strengthen and turn my "call-to-holiness"into a less individualized journey, it does not seem applicable at all. As I said earlier on this thread, I started out a skeptic, but with an open-mind. Now, I am admittedly a little beyond not-interested,and am a critic of it.

 

[DebChris]

tafan, Cursillo folks can’t admit what you propose (that if you like theological depth and silent retreat, then Cursillo is not for you), because it’s just absolutely false. People who prefer those types of things can still enjoy and/or get a lot out of Cursillo. One reason for this truth is that people aren’t rigidly defined as either emotional/spiritual vs. theological/intellectual/reflective. Cursillo stimulates all of those, if you ask me. The fact that there may be a bit more of the emotional going on doesn’t mean that’s the focus of Cursillo. Rather, it could be a sign that The Emotional is made very separate from your other preferred encounters with the theological, and Cursillo is different because it taps that part of your humanity a bit more. But just because you prefer one sort of encounter doesn’t mean that you will not enjoy or benefit from a different sort.

Moreover, I just reject your basic point which seems to be that The Emotional is somehow irrelevant to one’s spirituality and search for Christ (and therefore, any program designed to address The Emotional is hooey and a waste of time for intellectual folks). Made in God’s image, we have all the tools to know Him. This includes the many emotions we have which can be very helpful in telling us about ourselves, our neighbor and God.

I already posted about my previous experience with silent retreats. Yes, I did enjoy them. While I would not live my life in a Trappist monastery, I also enjoyed the day I spent there.

I also find it interesting that the 4th day letter I received today from Brian Pusateri was about his taking an 8 day silent retreat 3 months ago. The letter focused on the song Hosea, in which God calls us to return to Him, especially during this Lenten season.
Long have I waited for your coming home to me and living deeply our new life.

Years ago, I made an Intensive Journal retreat during an especially difficult period of my life. Many of us do tend to compartmentalize our intellectual and emotional selves. This can be very unhealthy. Depression was explained to me as repressed anger. We need to develop healthy ways of expressing our emotions. They are a part of who God made us to be. We are called to love God with our entire being, and that includes our emotions. Almost all of us attending the Intensive Journal retreat had difficulty letting go of our intellectual selves so that we could express our emotional side.

Our Faith is about so much more than ritual. It is not merely an intellectual study of theology. Our Faith is about relationship, our relationship with God, and our relationships with one another.

 

[DebChris]

tafan–I agree Cursillo is not for those who are already drifting away from the Faith. It is not a means of pulling somebody “back into the fold.” The sponsor’s guide does mention those who should not make Cursillo. Cursillo means “short course” and is meant for those who want to learn more about their Faith. It is a lay movement that had its beginning in Spain in response to the need for catechesis.
Individuals who make Cursillo come from many different backgrounds. Each of us responds differently as the Holy Spirit works within our lives.
The parish priest signs off on the perspective Cursillista’s application.

 

[tafan]

tafan–I agree Cursillo is not for those who are already drifting away from the Faith. It is not a means of pulling somebody “back into the fold.” The sponsor’s guide does mention those who should not make Cursillo. Cursillo means “short course” and is meant for those who want to learn more about their Faith. It is a lay movement that had its beginning in Spain in response to the need for catechesis.
Individuals who make Cursillo come from many different backgrounds. Each of us responds differently as the Holy Spirit works within our lives.
The parish priest signs off on the perspective Cursillista’s application.

This part about the parish priest having to sign off on attendance is not really that important. It is a good step, but only that. I suspect there are two scenarios: 1) priests who are active themselves in Cursillo and really understand it, it might work here 2) the majority of pastors who are over worked, and receive the request, assume it is a good thing, and don’t put much thought into it.

Now, the Cursillo movement is who should make sure, via the sponsor and the local leaders,that the attendee is a good fit AND the attendee understands what and how the weekend is like (the latter seems to be diametrically opposed to the idea).

Many of us do tend to compartmentalize our intellectual and emotional selves. This can be very unhealthy.

I am sure this can be the case,but it is not always the case. For some of us, the exact opposite is the case. I know myself pretty well, and I know when to rely on emotions and when not to, when my emotions need “reigned in”. In general, and this is not for all, something more along the lines of stoicism is what fits me. And actually,it is not something I always like, but it is definitely the best. You can call this repressed, I call it control.

 

[gh4]

In all honesty, I don’t feel that I have been drifting. Actually I feel that the opposite had been happening to me. We got a new parish priest last spring and he’s really good. I have learned more about our mass and our faith than ever before. And had been more active at church than ever before.

I think what they are doing at cursillo is trying to take your mind away from all normal things and let it focus on God and how to become closer to him and how to learn to evangelize and bring others to God and to the Catholic faith. By keeping you inside and away from the outdoors, they are trying to keep you from being distracted I guess. And the only thing I can think of with the guards escorting us to and from our rooms if we needed something from them is to stop any theft from happening. ???
And honestly, it’s not so much my faith, but the fact that I just don’t want to go to mass and don’t want to be any part of a church or religious group right now.

But bottom line, it’s all my fault and I take responsibility for that. I should never have been there. I’d had enough warning from this board and this thread alone. And once I was there, I should have just shut up and dealt with it and left well enough alone.

 

[maryjk]

And for the love of Pete, why are you considering Cursillo? I really, really, really couldn’t possibly see recommending you make a Cursillo if it’s something that’s already striking a nerve with you and something that you’re going to make prove itself to you—rather than your just going and experiencing what it has to offer. So what’s the deal? Fam/Friend pressure? I mean they know you better than the rest of us, but, here’s a pro-tip from someone who has a lot of family in Cursillo: good, loving people can get obsessed with it and lose perspective and just recommend it to everyone they love. Then they get all sad that she doesn’t want to do it. Then they get holier-than-thou about her rejection. Are you just going to placate your sponsor? What’s motivating you to consider it?

Some things went on in my life last year that made someone think I needed a retreat. Now, I know Cursillo isn’t a retreat, but she mentioned the weekend to me. She told me that she had participated herself and really enjoyed herself.

According to my friend, I have the perfect personality for it. I am very outgoing, enjoy being around people. I have lots of friends, participate in a lot of church related activities. And I work, part time, for the parish.

She is right in the fact that I do need to “get away from it all.” I was planning a personal, quiet retreat at a local Monastery. I have done that type of retreat before. Just quiet time with God, plus LOTH with the sisters. It was incredibly renewing and refreshing. Lots of time to read, journal, think and pray.

She figured I might be interested in attending something different. I had set up a meeting with her, but had posted my questions here, in anticipation of our meeting.

Then I got the run around. And boy do I mean the run around. No one here seemed interested in answering any even general, Cursillo wide questions. No one remembered if they had to give up their watch, or if they just as a group decided to not wear them. No one could tell me why I couldn’t drive. Everyone simply remembered that this was the best not a retreat that they had ever done.

It seemed fishy to me.

So when I met with my friend, I told her how I felt. She confirmed that I wouldn’t be allowed to drive. That we weren’t allowed to wear watches or even bring cell phones. She told me that there would be very little, if any, quiet/private time. In fact, it seemed that the only private time would most likely be in the Confessional. Other than that, you would be with the group. She gave me more information that I found curious. And some information that I couldn’t believe.

I told her that maybe it wasn’t for me. You are right, she took it personally. In fact, she was in the process of getting permission for me to not only drive, but to also have my cell phone with me, when a medical condition put any traveling on hold.

 

[DebChris]

This part about the parish priest having to sign off on attendance is not really that important. It is a good step, but only that. I suspect there are two scenarios: 1) priests who are active themselves in Cursillo and really understand it, it might work here 2) the majority of pastors who are over worked, and receive the request, assume it is a good thing, and don’t put much thought into it.
Now, the Cursillo movement is who should make sure, via the sponsor and the local leaders,that the attendee is a good fit AND the attendee understands what and how the weekend is like (the latter seems to be diametrically opposed to the idea).

The local leader will not necessarily know the perspective cursillistas. The sponsor should definitely know the person he/she is sponsoring. If there is a dietary or other need, the hosts for the weekend do need to know about that need. My home parish is a small parish, and my pastor actually called ahead since I was on crutches due to a car accident. Nearby parishes are considerably larger.
There is also a third scenario possible. When the parishioner approaches the priest for his signature, he asks that person why he/she wants to make Cursillo or waits until he learns more about the program before actually putting his name on the dotted line.

 

[CB_Catholic]

I just wanted to post this: the people who are being called “guards” on the weekend are what is known as “Guides”. They are there to serve and assist the team and retreatants. They coordinate and do all the scut work. It is one of the most difficult jobs on a team. No matter what anyone thinks of the weekend, one should not be insulting to these people who have given up many months to prepare for this and are truly unselfish. No one seems to consider the fact that the people putting on the Cursillo-- Speakers, Rector, Guides. Spiritual Directors, etc., for the most part–and I mean the MOST part-do it it for the love of Christ and for their brothers and sisters in Christ. They truly want to serve and evangelize. They have spent months preparing, sacrificing, fasting and praying. I think this should be recognized, and some gratitude should be shown for all their hard work–not just criticism.

Besides these people, there are hundreds of people behind the scenes who have given hours and hours of their time, and considerable energy to keep the weekend going. These people too fast and pray and sacrifice for others. They spend hours on their knees and giving up creature comforts for the success of the weekend, that people will be touched by the Holy Spirit.

You don’t have to like Cursillo, and some people just are not able to benefit from it. You should, however, respect the enormous effort and all of the prayer and sacrifice made. I am not singling anyone out, here, I am talking to all those who have been critical.

As to the impact it made on me–it was the love of the Holy Spirit working through His people that touched me. I felt that love. I was amazed that people I didn’t even know would take the time and energy to care enough about ME to want to help me find the fullest relationship with Christ I could have. And it didn’t end on the weekend. That love is what keeps the Church going. I had to learn to open myself to it. This is not an “emotional” thing–it is a reality of the love of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit–it is through people that the Church is built and the Good News is proclaimed. I wanted to learn more and work for the Lord. It put that desire in me, and now, 30 years later, I am still in a Cursillo group in the most wonderful Christian relationships I could imagine. That is how life-changing it can be. I went from a pew sitter, to a person who wanted to please the Lord and bring others to Christ. I learned this is not just about me and Jesus–it is also about me and Jesus and others.

A popular thing in Cursillo is to reflect on Christ’s words on the Cross–“I thirst”. He is thirsting for souls. It is up to us to slake that great thirst, as it says in the Cursillo song. That is what Cursillo is all about for me. My eyes were opened, but then again, I have to say I was willing to have my eyes opened, and the Lord used that.

 

[gh4]

I just wanted to post this: the people who are being called “guards” on the weekend are what is known as “Guides”. They are there to serve and assist the team and retreatants. They coordinate and do all the scut work. It is one of the most difficult jobs on a team. No matter what anyone thinks of the weekend, one should not be insulting to these people who have given up many months to prepare for this and are truly unselfish. No one seems to consider the fact that the people putting on the Cursillo-- Speakers, Rector, Guides. Spiritual Directors, etc., for the most part–and I mean the MOST part-do it it for the love of Christ and for their brothers and sisters in Christ. They truly want to serve and evangelize. They have spent months preparing, sacrificing, fasting and praying. I think this should be recognized, and some gratitude should be shown for all their hard work–not just criticism.

Besides these people, there are hundreds of people behind the scenes who have given hours and hours of their time, and considerable energy to keep the weekend going. These people too fast and pray and sacrifice for others. They spend hours on their knees and giving up creature comforts for the success of the weekend, that people will be touched by the Holy Spirit.

You don’t have to like Cursillo, and some people just are not able to benefit from it. You should, however, respect the enormous effort and all of the prayer and sacrifice made. I am not singling anyone out, here, I am talking to all those who have been critical.

As to the impact it made on me–it was the love of the Holy Spirit working through His people that touched me. I felt that love. I was amazed that people I didn’t even know would take the time and energy to care enough about ME to want to help me find the fullest relationship with Christ I could have. And it didn’t end on the weekend. That love is what keeps the Church going. I had to learn to open myself to it. This is not an “emotional” thing–it is a reality of the love of Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit–it is through people that the Church is built and the Good News is proclaimed. I wanted to learn more and work for the Lord. It put that desire in me, and now, 30 years later, I am still in a Cursillo group in the most wonderful Christian relationships I could imagine. That is how life-changing it can be. I went from a pew sitter, to a person who wanted to please the Lord and bring others to Christ. I learned this is not just about me and Jesus–it is also about me and Jesus and others.

A popular thing in Cursillo is to reflect on Christ’s words on the Cross–“I thirst”. He is thirsting for souls. It is up to us to slake that great thirst, as it says in the Cursillo song. That is what Cursillo is all about for me. My eyes were opened, but then again, I have to say I was willing to have my eyes opened, and the Lord used that.

And that’s all well and good. I’m able to walk to my room, swallow a couple of ibuprofin and get back to the rollos room without a “guide” or anyone/thing else. If made me feel like a bad child who could not be trusted.

The ONLY Private time is in the shower. Even in confession the priest is there with you.

Yes, my sponsor was part of the giving team and I know how much time and effort she put into this, and I know how many prayers, and rosaries and daily masses she put into this. I don’t disrespect her for that at all, in fact I really do respect her for that. I realize that most people probably enjoy Cursillo. But I told y’all I’d let you know what I thought of it, and I HATED EVERY MOMENT of it and it will be a LONG time before I can even talk about this past weekend without crying and wanting to go and hide in my closet. I really feel like I should be ashamed that it isn’t for me, that I am faulty for not loving every minute of it.
As with anything, if you get or if you give, you have to roll with the punches and take the good with the bad. There is no guarantee that everyone there will even finish the weekend, more or less love it and have life changing experiences with it.
I will never know how many of those women went home loving it and how many couldn’t wait to get out of there. I know I wasn’t the only one who didn’t get it. We talked about it, and as of Saturday, only one person I talked to felt that is was an experience that would change their life.

Meh, I’m done with it. It wasn’t my cup of tea, and it changed my life, but not for the better I’m afraid.

So it is what it is, and Yes, if you want to go, by all means go.
But do think about it twice if you have any special needs or if you are not a ‘jump out of bed and be happy and life is wonderful’ kind of person. Make sure you know what you are getting into, 3 days is a long time to be miserable. And people WILL think you are a failure if you don’t stick it out, I’ve already found that one out. Only one person told me “it’s good that you left when you did if it wasn’t your thing” the rest just couldn’t believe I didn’t love it.

And I’m off to get the house cleaned up and the laundry from the weekend done.

 

[tafan]

CB Catholic:

I just wanted to post this: the people who are being called “guards” on the weekend are what is known as “Guides”. They are there to serve and assist the team and retreatants. They coordinate and do all the scut work. It is one of the most difficult jobs on a team. No matter what anyone thinks of the weekend, one should not be insulting to these people who have given up many months to prepare for this and are truly unselfish.

No doubt they are very well meaning and doing exactly what they are told by an organization they wholeheartedly believe in. That being said, it is not insulting to them to describe their function accurarately. And if they are escorts when you go to the bathroom, I think the term guard is perfectly fair and not insulting.

It seems to boil down to the idea that the Cursillo movement wants you to be like children, in every possible way: escorts everywhere, childlike crafts for projects, type of food served, no watches, etc. . This is not the same as having a “childlike faith” or being humble.

 

[Jeremiah1278]

…

She is right in the fact that I do need to “get away from it all.” I was planning a personal, quiet retreat at a local Monastery. I have done that type of retreat before. Just quiet time with God, plus LOTH with the sisters. It was incredibly renewing and refreshing. Lots of time to read, journal, think and pray.

This sounds pretty good to me right now… I need to find something along these lines nearby.

I told her that maybe it wasn’t for me. You are right, she took it personally. In fact, she was in the process of getting permission for me to not only drive, but to also have my cell phone with me, when a medical condition put any traveling on hold.

Ugh. Sorry to hear that. I hope you find something that hits the spot, so to speak. If you do end up going on a Cursillo weekend someday, I hope it’s a good one. And I hope things are turning out well for you medically speaking. Take care.

 

[maryjk]

And I hope things are turning out well for you medically speaking. Take care.

Minor out patient surgery on Friday.

Any prayers you can send my way would be appreciated.

 

[cjmclark]

This is a nationally run group. For information, people are sent to the national site.

So are the Boy Scouts. But that doesn’t mean that all the troops are run in exactly the same fashion or with the same effectiveness. It is a national group that is administrated at the local level.

The Catholic Church is an international organization, but the majority of decisions that affect an average Catholic’s religious life are made at the parish level. That’s why there are very good parishes and very bad ones.

Cursillo is the same. It may be a “national” organization, but virtually all the decisions that matter in how a given weekend turns out are made at the local level. It’s run by local volunteers. There isn’t someone from the national headquarters swinging by to make sure everything’s going ok…it’s locally run and attended by local people.

As far as going to the national site, that can give you a good idea of the organization’s mission, but as before, the specifics are dealt with locally.

Prior knowledge is a secret. Talk to as many people as you like. You will not get straight answers from anyone. If we could get straight answers, we could gather those answers and then decide based on what the majority say the weekend is about.

If you go to a member of your local group with the list of questions you asked here (watches, cell phones, car rides, taped over windows, et c.) and you can’t get a straight answer from them, then yes, maybe it’s not a good idea to attend. Folks here appear to have had a variety of different experiences. Some were definitely more coy about it than others. That sort of evasiveness is hard to do with someone face-to-face, which is why you should contact locals if you want definitive answers, especially if you have legitimate concerns such as medical/dietary issues. That information would be good to share here - “Hey, if you’re thinking of attending Cursillo in Seattle, here are the pertinent details…”

gh4…I wish you had a friend that could go with you to meet with the priest. Someone that could just stand with you and support you. They wouldn’t have to be Catholic or have gone on the weekend. But someone should be told about the carelessness and thoughtlessness that occurred during the weekend.

This is a good idea, especially if it would make you more likely to bring these serious issues to light.

But as you can see, secrecy even about what time it is, is somehow more important then someone taking their meds on time. Instead of addressing that someone was leaving, they hid the person until her ride showed up. (Bet they were hoping she would change her mind and stay. Otherwise someone there could have taken her home.) Or one where they ask you not to drive, or one where they ask you to not wear a watch or one where you don’t have access to a phone to call someone to come and get you. Because no one else will talk about it, other than those that had a bad time, those people DO define Cursillo. This is why I have a bad opinion of it. Because I can’t find one person that is willing to tell me why it changed their life. Why it was so good. Why it is different than any other retreat.

So when I met with my friend, I told her how I felt. She confirmed that I wouldn’t be allowed to drive. That we weren’t allowed to wear watches or even bring cell phones. She told me that there would be very little, if any, quiet/private time. In fact, it seemed that the only private time would most likely be in the Confessional. Other than that, you would be with the group. She gave me more information that I found curious. And some information that I couldn’t believe.

I told her that maybe it wasn’t for me. You are right, she took it personally. In fact, she was in the process of getting permission for me to not only drive, but to also have my cell phone with me, when a medical condition put any traveling on hold.

Those people only define it if you let them. CAF is a nice resource, but it’s not always going to be the best place to get information for everything. Same with the Internet. It looks like you talked it over with your friend, and I’m sorry she took it personally when you told her you wouldn’t be able to go right now. But that (talking to her) was the best way to try to get the details that you needed.

 

[Alfonsus]

So yes, the best resource is asking those people running the cursillo.

The problem some people faced, like our sister gh4 here was they didn’t gave enough information to equip you to make proper judgment to participate or not.
And seems like, even those people running the cursillos, don’t have same criteria regarding “what to keep secret and what is not secret.”

Thus the decision to ask in this forum.

 

[cjmclark]

Minor out patient surgery on Friday.

Any prayers you can send my way would be appreciated.

I will pray for you!

 

[cjmclark]

So yes, the best resource is asking those people running the cursillo.

The problem some people faced, like our sister gh4 here was they didn’t gave enough information to equip you to make proper judgment to participate or not.
And seems like, even those people running the cursillos, don’t have same criteria regarding “what to keep secret and what is not secret.”

Thus the decision to ask in this forum.

Where this forum is useful is in identifying specific questions to ask/concerns to raise with the local coordinators. I wouldn’t have known prior to reading this thread that asking people to leave or relinquish their watches and cell phones is a common practice. If that was an issue for me, then I’d know to raise it with the local folks, and that’s good info. I just think we should be able to communicate stuff like that without raising the specter of some shadowy cabal engaging in cult-like behavior.

It’s a lot harder for people to be evasive if you can ask them direct questions. Instead of asking your Cursillo sponsor the ever-vague “Is there anything I need to know about?” to which the answer will invariably be some variation on “Just that you’re going to have an AWESOME TIME!” or something to that effect, asking directly “I have this dietary issue. What kind of food will there be, and can I bring my own/can some accommodation be made?” or “I’m taking this medication…how can I be sure what time it is so I don’t miss a dose?” or “I have real issues being shut in…will we be allowed to go outdoors/will the windows be taped over?” should be much more effective.

The point is that they (the local coordinators/your sponsor) are the only ones that can accurately answer those specific questions for your local Cursillo. If they are evasive or refuse outright, well, then I’d consider not going and perhaps contacting the diocesan coordinator. The event is supposed to educate people about their faith and make them feel closer to God, not feel all creeped out and awkward.