Cecila, thanks. Saddest thing is, I am not angry. I am overwhelmingly sad. Our marriage is reduced to this.
Be sad, but don’t be afraid to also be angry if it comes. You know anger is not a sin. It’s an emotion God gave us. It’s the angry actions that can be sins.
Not harsh, reality I guess.
But I have to worry about the house. I have 4 children living here and I am not about to lose it to him! I will fight for it if I have to. He is not on the title so I do not think he has a claim. And I don’t think that he would go so far as to expect me to sell it. It is my security.
I tried to do this, but 3 different lawyers told me that I couldn’t. I am planning on going away and wanted to do this so I could take our son but they said there was no such thing. I am confused
He is just saying that he will be getting legal advice about a property settlement.
His name is not on the title. It was in my name and we thought about changing it but I’m glad I didn’t.
Sounds to me like pure bravado. Try not to worry over the weekend. I have a strong feeling you’ll soon find out he’s full of horse pucky.
If the house was in your name and you brought it into this very brief marriage, then it probably will be considered yours in the eyes of the law. I’m not sure what property laws are like in Australia, but in Canada, any property you acquire while married to each other, including pensions, savings, stocks, vehicles, trailers, etc., is subject to division during divorce.
It’s craziness. Some people only want what they can’t have.Thank you. I checked the site and I had rung the ones closest to me. One of them I was unable to access as it seems that my husband is already their client.
This lawyer I am seeing monday is ok with installments. I just feel it is a complete waste of time as I have very little to give him.
Thank you Liberanosamalo,Something tells me the laws in Australia, Canada and the US are similar in that they are all based on British Common Law. The judges work mostly for the good of the kids in a divorce. They try to keep things stable for them. My ex sounds like yours, Jules, and has all along. Mine was a “loner” but deep down needed women to feed his ego. And everything he did-- he accused ME of doing it. Told me nothing about myself, but told me everything about what he was up to. He never knew me.
Mine threatened to destroy me and told me he would kick me out on the street (with three young children.) I got the house and the equity in the house and he had to pay child support.
He carted most of the furniture out, which was his before the marriage. I was initially sad, but now I’m glad because I don’t want any reminders of that time in my house really.
Do as little talking with him as you can. It will only drain you. He will blame you because otherwise he would have to take the blame and that would ruin his opinion of himself.
Most lawyers will ask for an amount of money up front. You’ll pay by the hour so they don’t need you to sell your house. As long as they get their fee, they don’t care. A good lawyer will help you keep your house and as much time with the kids as possible.
Don’t be shy about describing the man’s cruelty and distance during your miscarriage and his other bizarre and cold behavior. That kind of thing is leverage in negotiating too.
I’m sad for you because I know how hard and heartbreaking this is. And don’t be surprised if once he can’t have you anymore you suddenly become the world’s most desirable woman. And don’t even try to figure it out.
Something tells me the laws in Australia, Canada and the US are similar in that they are all based on British Common Law. The judges work mostly for the good of the kids in a divorce. They try to keep things stable for them. My ex sounds like yours, Jules, and has all along. Mine was a “loner” but deep down needed women to feed his ego. And everything he did-- he accused ME of doing it. Told me nothing about myself, but told me everything about what he was up to. He never knew me.
Mine threatened to destroy me and told me he would kick me out on the street (with three young children.) I got the house and the equity in the house and he had to pay child support.
He carted most of the furniture out, which was his before the marriage. I was initially sad, but now I’m glad because I don’t want any reminders of that time in my house really.
Do as little talking with him as you can. It will only drain you. He will blame you because otherwise he would have to take the blame and that would ruin his opinion of himself.
Most lawyers will ask for an amount of money up front. You’ll pay by the hour so they don’t need you to sell your house. As long as they get their fee, they don’t care. A good lawyer will help you keep your house and as much time with the kids as possible.
Don’t be shy about describing the man’s cruelty and distance during your miscarriage and his other bizarre and cold behavior. That kind of thing is leverage in negotiating too.
I’m sad for you because I know how hard and heartbreaking this is. And don’t be surprised if once he can’t have you anymore you suddenly become the world’s most desirable woman. And don’t even try to figure it out.
Geat advice, Jules I wouldn’t worry about the house first of all Leberan is correct a good attorney will not want you to sell it. Secondly your husband has NO claim on it none, do not let him scare you. You are in my prayers!