I agree. People can have a reasoned discussion, and even disagree on key points, and still remain respectful. It requires a degree of self-control and maturity, of course. If I were to post “there is no scientific evidence for the Book of Mormon story” it’s not an attack on a Mormon or their beliefs, it’s just a statement from which there can be a legitimate discussion of the science that tends to support/disprove the book.
On the other hand, if I were to post that someone was an idiot for believing in all the fairy tales in the Bible, that would be both uncharitable and unproductive, as it does not serve to promote reasoned discussion.
Some of this comes from the anonymity of the internet. I have heard people say that THEY are not the “person” who posts a message ~ that’s just a “screen name” to them, separate and apart from their “real” life. By viewing themselves this way ~ sort of a technological multiple personality ~ they give themselves permission to become whoever they choose to be. People who post invective on the internet do not always feel responsible for it because, in their minds, it’s not “them” ~ it’s just a screen name.
It’s all nonsense of course, as you are responsible for everything you do ~ you can’t really hide behind a screen name and pretend it wasn’t “you” ~ but that is how many seem to excuse themselves for their bad behavior ~ they don’t think THEY are doing anything wrong ~ only the “screen name” is ~ BAD SCREEN NAME!!