God’s grace led me by a long, convoluted, and at times very dark path, to Jesus Christ. Who is Truth. I lost that anger. It has been replaced with love, which is a most surprising thing.
Most devout LDS I know have a desire to follow Jesus Christ, which, is a good aspect about Mormonism. Mormons only need to see the clear path given to us, the Way, who is Jesus Christ. Which isn’t the person who Mormons call by the same name. That path isn’'t found in Mormonism. The struggle as a Mormon to find that path is such an impossible and frustrating endeavor. The Truth is easy, beautiful, profound and simply floors me.
DING DING DING we have a winner! You nailed it on the head - it’s all about love. And it’s so amazingly simple. The Catechism of the Catholic Church says in its very first paragraph:
God, infinitely perfect and blessed in himself, in a plan of sheer goodness freely created man to make him share in his own blessed life. For this reason, at every time and in every place, God draws close to man. He calls man to seek him, to know him, to love him with all his strength. He calls together all men, scattered and divided by sin, into the unity of his family, the Church. To accomplish this, when the fullness of time had come, God sent his Son as Redeemer and Savior. In his Son and through him, he invites men to become, in the Holy Spirit, his adopted children and thus heirs of his blessed life.
As always, when I find myself at a loss of words, I can find a phrase from my beloved sister in Carmel, little Thérèse, that sums up what I am trying to say:
Chapters Twelve and Thirteen of the First Epistle to the Corinthians fell under my eyes, I read there, in the first of these chapters, that all cannot be apostles, prophets, doctors, and so on, that the Church is composed of different members, and that the eye cannot be the hand at one and the same time.
The answer was clear, but it did not fulfill my desires and gave me no peace. Without becoming discouraged, I continued my reading, and this sentence consoled me: ‘yet strive after the better gifts, and I point out to you a yet more excellent way.’ And the Apostle explains how all the most perfect gifts are nothing without love. That charity is the excellent way that leads most surely to God.
I finally had rest. Considering the mystical body of the Church, I had not recognized myself in any of the members described by Saint Paul, or rather I desired to see myself in them all. Charity gave me the key to my vocation.
I understood that if the Church had a body composed of different members, the most necessary and most noble of all could not be lacking to it, and so I understood that the Church had a heart and that this heart was burning with love. I understood it was love alone that made the Church’s members act, that if love ever became extinct, apostles would not preach the Gospel and martyrs would not shed their blood. I understood that love comprised all vocations, that love was everything, that it embraced all times and places … in a word, that it was eternal!
Then, in the excess of my delirious joy, I cried our: 'O Jesus, my Love … my vocation, at last I have found it… my vocation is Love!'
Yes, I have found my place in the Church and it is You, O my God, Who have given me this place: in the heart of the Church, my mother, I shall be love. Thus I shall be everything, and thus my dream will be realized.
My sweet Thérèse has taught me to simply run into the arms of Christ and live in His beautiful and infinite love for me. How simple is that love compared to the twisted complications of life as a Mormon? How many times did I lose my peace when I had no consolation as I read the scriptures, as I attended Sacrament meeting, as I performed ceremonies in the temple? And yet I look back now and realize, I did these things out of duty, out of fear for my soul, and never once looked at God and simply smiled in adoration and love. How lost I was! How wretched I was! And yet with His sanctifying grace, I walk now in unity with Him, striving every moment to do nothing but His holy will for me. I pray constantly for the grace to do His holy will so that I may spend eternity with Him in love. I pray as the cup is lifted to Him in the prayer of the holy mass that I may be purified and sanctified so that I may become a worthy tabernacle of the sacrifice of his Love. It’s all about love and about unity with Him right here, right now.
As a Mormon, the one scripture that was the foundation of why our church came to be was James 1:5 - “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” As a Catholic, this one tends to mean much more to me:
[BIBLEDRB]John 17:26[/BIBLEDRB]
Or to quote Saint John of the Cross, “O my God, make me understand that I am Your dwelling-place, the hiding place where You conceal Yourself. Have courage and rejoice, my soul, knowing that the object of your hope is so near to you that He dwells in you and you cannot exist without Him. What more could I desire, and what do I seek outside of myself, O my Lord and my God, when You have deigned to put Your kingdom, Your dwelling-place, in my very soul? Here, then, in the innermost sanctuary of my heart, I wish to love, desire, and adore You; no, I shall no longer go to seek You outside myself.” (cf. St John of the Cross, Spiritual Canticle 1,7.8)