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basilisk
Guest
Actually, Malia’s husband posts here sometimes as Feanaro. I think this user’s name is just oddly close.
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yellowbird
Guest
Yep - agree with the last couple of posts. I don’t think men & women are totally interchangable… I could never be a “Dad” no matter how hard I tried to do dad things… I am a woman. That said, I think that a SAHD can do just as a good of a job nurturing and caring for the children as the Mom. It may not be the same sort of nurturing that the Mom provides… but it can be every bit as good, and sometimes better as samcarter14’s example of childhood shows.
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3Sanctus
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Lol, Bama, I was wondering the same thing. I certainly hope they’ve planned ahead on this and he hasn’t just decided to give her the boot into the workplace when the baby comes along, lol. 
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3Sanctus
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Ooops…just realized…Feanor…J.R.R. Tolkien’s Silmarillion…lol.
Ignore my previous immature post.
Ignore my previous immature post.
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CatholicSam
Guest
Yes, I totally respect stay at home dads! 
I’m just so glad that my hubby works so that I can be at home with my children! This is truly my vocation and calling in life. How does your wife feel about it? Is she happy to be going to work and leaving baby at home with you? I know I would be devastated if I had to be the one to go to work, although it would make it a lot easier knowing baby was home with his/her dad and not a nanny or day care provider.
My husband only recently started making more money than I used to. We started out in a small apartment and then moved into an inexpensive and modest house. We drive old cars (a '97 and an '02) and hardly ever eat out. We haven’t been on a vacation since before we had children. All of these sacrifices have been much more than worth it for me to stay at home
Not one day goes by that I’m not thankful for our living/working arrangement. I am excited for you getting to experience this for yourself soon! It’s a wonderful life.
I’m just so glad that my hubby works so that I can be at home with my children! This is truly my vocation and calling in life. How does your wife feel about it? Is she happy to be going to work and leaving baby at home with you? I know I would be devastated if I had to be the one to go to work, although it would make it a lot easier knowing baby was home with his/her dad and not a nanny or day care provider.My husband only recently started making more money than I used to. We started out in a small apartment and then moved into an inexpensive and modest house. We drive old cars (a '97 and an '02) and hardly ever eat out. We haven’t been on a vacation since before we had children. All of these sacrifices have been much more than worth it for me to stay at home
Not one day goes by that I’m not thankful for our living/working arrangement. I am excited for you getting to experience this for yourself soon! It’s a wonderful life.
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TravisandJill
Guest
Shoot I wish my hubby would be a SAHD and I could go to work LOL He is wayyyy better with the kids than I am. I dont have patience and I really dont like being an at home mom. He is better than I at the nurturing.
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Feanor
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Thanks everyone for your encouragement!
This will certainly be an adventure for the both of us. I will try to commit some time for my profession- even just seminars and such. I really love what I do professionally. In fact I am getting ready to take the Licensed Independent Clinical Social Work exam so wish me luck!
I am glad to hear of your support! I was afraid I might “Real men go to work” type thing.
By the way I will refrain from the breast feeding.
I will also pose questions to you parents as I will have many questions no doubt.
This will certainly be an adventure for the both of us. I will try to commit some time for my profession- even just seminars and such. I really love what I do professionally. In fact I am getting ready to take the Licensed Independent Clinical Social Work exam so wish me luck!
I am glad to hear of your support! I was afraid I might “Real men go to work” type thing.
By the way I will refrain from the breast feeding.
I will also pose questions to you parents as I will have many questions no doubt.
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Feanaro_s_Wife
Guest
But you don’t HAVE to. You could use an SNS (tube that draws from a bottle that women who have supply issues or where the baby has feeding issues have to use) taped to your “breast” and “breast feed” the baby… but that would be weird.By the way I will refrain from the breast feeding.
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Feanor
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Yes a tad weird indeed!
Plus I don’t think she would appreciate the hair in her mouth. . .
Plus I don’t think she would appreciate the hair in her mouth. . .
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ThyKingdomCome
Guest
God Bless you for taking on that responsibility. Many couples, knowing the wife’s salary was larger, would choose daycare. My dh has always said he’d be a SAHD if I had the earning potential to support our family as well as he does, but he’d have to push me out of the house kicking and screaming…(I guess I’m lucky I picked a really badly paying field of work 
) My sister in law has a 7mo baby. She and her husband both have to keep their jobs to support themselves where they live. So she took off 4 months of work (what was allowed), and then her husband took off the next 3 months (sick time I think). The baby is just this week going into a babysitting situation, but they found a unique way to give him as long as they could with his parents. Every family has to figure out what works for them. As long as the motivation is the best interest of the child, I’m good with it.
) My sister in law has a 7mo baby. She and her husband both have to keep their jobs to support themselves where they live. So she took off 4 months of work (what was allowed), and then her husband took off the next 3 months (sick time I think). The baby is just this week going into a babysitting situation, but they found a unique way to give him as long as they could with his parents. Every family has to figure out what works for them. As long as the motivation is the best interest of the child, I’m good with it.
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basilisk
Guest
Real men step up to their responsibilities and meet their obligations. How they do that is up to them!
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whatevergirl
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Yes I do respect SAHD’s…same way I respect SAHM’s. Only in America, is the invention of stereotypical gender roles that often leave so many people feeling like they are doing the wrong thing, when they are acting in the best interest of their family. Feanor–good luck to you…I think that if this is the best solution for your family, it does not matter what anyone thinks.
Parenting is a team sport.
Parenting is a team sport.
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motherofsix
Guest
I guess I will be hated after this but, it’s not that I don’t “respect” SAHDs, I just think it is not the place for them. Mom, no matter what the money situation, should be home. That is my opinion. That’s all it is. I hope that things work out for you. Please do not take my answer to heart. I just wanted to put my 2 cents in like everyone else.
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sanctareparata
Guest
I respect them, yes. (*Most *of them - two guys I know are SAHDs only because they are too lazy to keep down jobs and pretty much stay at home all day playing their games, watching TV and browsing the internet).
Can I offer some advice? One of the hardest things for me lately with my own DH (he works 2 days a week, so the rest of the time he’s home), is that on the 2 days when I go into the office to work, I come home at night with still *more *to do. As in: kids aren’t always fed, house is a mess, dishes aren’t done, dirt and mud have been tracked through the house and not swept up or vacuumed, laundry hasn’t been touched, bathrooms are disgusting, etc.
Apparently, lately, he thinks being a SAHD means just playing with the kids all day and taking naps when they do.
Makes for one VERY grumpy Momma when Momma comes home. :tsktsk:
If it was like this 5 days a week, I’d lose it.
The good news is that he’s very apologetic and is learning to do better.
ETA: I just realized how saying my DH works 2 days a week makes him sound like a bum. Those 2 days actually total 50 hours, plus, so yeah, he does work hard when he’s on the job.
Can I offer some advice? One of the hardest things for me lately with my own DH (he works 2 days a week, so the rest of the time he’s home), is that on the 2 days when I go into the office to work, I come home at night with still *more *to do. As in: kids aren’t always fed, house is a mess, dishes aren’t done, dirt and mud have been tracked through the house and not swept up or vacuumed, laundry hasn’t been touched, bathrooms are disgusting, etc.
Apparently, lately, he thinks being a SAHD means just playing with the kids all day and taking naps when they do.
Makes for one VERY grumpy Momma when Momma comes home. :tsktsk:If it was like this 5 days a week, I’d lose it.
The good news is that he’s very apologetic and is learning to do better.
ETA: I just realized how saying my DH works 2 days a week makes him sound like a bum. Those 2 days actually total 50 hours, plus, so yeah, he does work hard when he’s on the job.
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Feanor
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That’s why I asked for folks thoughts and opinions- it’s fine!
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Rob_s_Wife
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Yes. Absolutely. Can’t think of anything about it there is to not respect.
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dakotagirl
Guest
I think it is just fine. In fact, if I had a husband who had the house clean, the kid to bed, and dinner made when I got home, then I would consider him extremely studly.
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pnewton
Guest
I can totally see where that would work. I am a part-time SAHD and full time worker. (I work shift work). Therefore, I get to have the best of both worlds, professional and family. In fact, I find that dealing with my little one, feeding, cleaning, changing diapers, is actually helps me be better at what I do, especially the diaper part.
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ChristinaM
Guest
Awesome to see all the love for stay at home dads! My DH and I have talked about him staying home when children come along. He makes good money, but he is not as “career driven” as me and says he would be just as happy staying at home with children. Once I finish my degree I will probably have more earning power than him. So we’ll see how it goes.
My DH and I have talked about him staying home when children come along. He makes good money, but he is not as “career driven” as me and says he would be just as happy staying at home with children. Once I finish my degree I will probably have more earning power than him. So we’ll see how it goes.
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vocatio
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Welcome to the club, DAD! I was Mr. Mom for the first 3 or 4 months of our oldest son’s life. That was mainly because I was still trying to find a full-time job during that time. Talk about drivng one crazy. I firmly believe that most women posses a natural gene that gives them something more compatible with being the one to stay home with children. However, we do what we must do.
Be proud and feel lucky that you’re the one who get’s to do it. But, help make you wife continue to feel special through it. I gained about 25 pounds during that first year. So make sure you stay active. Children really do tie you down.
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