Dressing for Mass?

[Becca3]

This is interesting, because dressing in shorts/spaghetti straps/etc. does happen a lot in the United States.

On the other hand, when I went to WYD 2000 in Rome, one of the standouts was, that in front of many churches (especially in front of cathedrals and basilicas), was a “dress code” sign that stated that shoulders and knees were required to be covered. Even if you could not read Italian, diagrams were shown which specifically showed this. And, yes, there were guards outside to make sure everyone was following the dress code. And, also, yes, this was in the middle of August, so it was hot and humid in Italy. The women could adapt, easily enough, as many wraps that could be used as both makeshift shawls and makeshift long skirts were sold near the churches, so they could put the wraps on as they entered the churches and take them off as they left. For us men, though, it generally meant that we had to be in long pants all day if we were visiting a cathedral and/or basilica that day. This was one of the crosses we had to bear.

Wow. Amazing how Rome has not been touched by the modern world and its culture and mores. I want to go there one day. I wish I could go back in time like that.

 

[JordanRogers]

I don’t have a lot of nice clothes and I don’t really think God cares how I look.

 

[Arebella]

I, too was raised in the era of dressing up for church, and I still do, but I think it’s much more important to get the person to come to church no matter what he/she wears. If the person is more comfortable wearing casual clothes, then that’s ok with me. God doesn’t care what we wear; He just cares that we’re there.

 

[Della]

I don’t have a lot of nice clothes and I don’t really think God cares how I look.

You’re right. Just wear the best you have and be at peace about it. I think of the people in earlier times who didn’t have nice clothes. The average woman had one nice dress she wore to all nicer occasions. She had mostly house dresses. I remember my mom wearing house dresses when I was a little girl. She had 3 good dress suits consisting of a skirt and jacket with which she wore a crisp white blouse for all nice occasions. Anyway, whatever you have is fine, of course. If anyone gives you the “evil eye” that’s their problem, not yours.

 

[HoosMommie]

Welp, I started one of the dreaded “look what they’re wearing to Mass!” threads last year and got my comeuppance right quick. Oh well. I am still appalled sometimes but have learned to look at others as I want them to look at me, with love knowing they are children of God, too. I do tend to dress up for Sunday Mass but go more casually to the one weekday Mass I attend.

 

[Becca3]

Welp, I started one of the dreaded “look what they’re wearing to Mass!” threads last year and got my comeuppance right quick. Oh well. I am still appalled sometimes but have learned to look at others as I want them to look at me, with love knowing they are children of God, too. I do tend to dress up for Sunday Mass but go more casually to the one weekday Mass I attend.

Yes, I know what you mean. One day soon, I will go to a weekday Mass and dress more casually too. Or maybe not. Who knows? Depends on how I feel going in there.

 

[CradleJourney]

You have a good point there. Very much so. Yes, so what if someone thinks I am not singing or participating in prayers but they haven’t realized that I am new to the faith. I do try to understand everyone and where they are coming from. Hence this thread.

I’m sure you do! And I certainly hope I didn’t imply otherwise - I thought your OP was a very polite inquiry. And you never know - simply by dressing a bit more formal than the norm for your parish may inspire someone else to think about doing so as well.

 

[Deus_tecum]

Dressing up for Mass is more a matter of vanity than anything else. People dress up to be seen as dressed up by other people.

 

[Della]

Dressing up for Mass is more a matter of vanity than anything else. People dress up to be seen as dressed up by other people.

That can be true, but there’s also the image one may wish to convey–that we are in God’s house and should therefore dress for the King of kings instead of for a BBQ. No one gives me a second glance when I dress for Sunday Mass when I’ve put on a nice pair of slacks and a decent blouse. But, I would hope it might inspire those who come dressed in their worst, looking like beach bums or inappropriately, that they should perhaps reconsider what they are wearing to Mass. That’s not the reason I dress decently, but it might be an additional benefit to others, at least I can hope so.

 

[agnes_therese]

Now, these past two weeks going to Mass, it was such a shock to me to see people come in with slacks . . . I feel like that was a sign of disrespect to God in the chapel. I would like to hear your thoughts on this.

Slacks are disrespectful? Really?

 

[Della]

Slacks are disrespectful? Really?

I agree. A nice pair of slacks is every bit as good as a skirt or dress, IMO. After all, some gals wear skirts hiked up to their behinds–now that is disrespectful to me. And not every dress is appropriate, either. I think a bit of common sense needs to be applied to dress for Sunday Mass. After all, in other times people had to wear whatever they owned, even if it wasn’t as nice as they’d like because they had nothing else. No one should feel they can’t go to Mass for fear of what others will think of their clothes. It’s being there that is important, not the quality of the clothes, yes?

 

[LilyM]

It’s all about the Real Presence. Once you become aware that Jesus is really at mass, your way of dressing totally changes. I am a cradle catholic, but I was not always aware. Now that I understand the Greatest Miracle at Mass, I dress appropriately to see the King of Kings!!

Like you, I always use to wear pants. Now I find myself wearing skirts for the most part in the summer.

Yes, God is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, but He is also our beloved ‘Daddy’ (‘Abba’ means exactly that, and that is what Jesus taught us to call God.) Do you really imagine Obama or Queen Elizabeth require their children to dress up every.single.time. they have a meal together? Of course not, because any parent will rightly focus more on what is in the child’s heart than what is on his or her back.

 

[Della]

Yes, God is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords, but He is also our beloved ‘Daddy’ (‘Abba’ means exactly that, and that is what Jesus taught us to call God.) Do you really imagine Obama or Queen Elizabeth require their children to dress up every.single.time. they have a meal together? Of course not, because any parent will rightly focus more on what is in the child’s heart than what is on his or her back.

True, however, the Mass is a communal service, not private prayer. Others are going to see us as we all worship together. I can certainly prayer to my Father in heaven in my PJs, but I certainly wouldn’t wear them to Mass, not even a daily Mass.

 

[Becca3]

It’s all about the Real Presence. Once you become aware that Jesus is really at mass, your way of dressing totally changes. I am a cradle catholic, but I was not always aware. Now that I understand the Greatest Miracle at Mass, I dress appropriately to see the King of Kings!!

Like you, I always use to wear pants. Now I find myself wearing skirts for the most part in the summer.

I feel the same way. I feel like I should dress for the King of Kings!! And also, what if by some chance He happens to really pay us a visit to our parish in person! I will want to be ready and dressed respectfully if that happens.

LilyM>By the way, Queen Elizabeth from what I heard from what Princess Kate said, that Prince William and everyone else had to dress very very decently around the breakfast table when the Queen was present. She is very stoic about that. Kate had to teach her husband that it was ok to stay in your jammies to have breakfast. lol.

 

[Gicutzu]

In the SDA church (at least where I live) everybody comes dressed in suits and ties (dresses/skirts for the ladies).

TBH it was a huge relief for me to be able to go to Mass in jeans and a t-shirt. I go to work that way (back-office corporate environment), and go to daily Mass after work. I absolutely hate having to wear a suit (or even a dress shirt), and I feel thoroughly uncomfortable wearing one - I think it’s better to go to Mass in jeans than to not go because you can’t stand more than five minutes with a dress shirt on.

I don’t think it’s a sign of disrespect to God because I don’t express my respect through clothing: a lot of people point out the fact that you go to a job interview in a suit and tie - yes, I do, but not because of the respect I have for the interviewer, but because I know that’s what he/she expects and I might not get the job otherwise. I don’t God expects a suit and tie from me, and won’t give me salvation otherwise.

 

[Della]

In the SDA church (at least where I live) everybody comes dressed in suits and ties (dresses/skirts for the ladies).

TBH it was a huge relief for me to be able to go to Mass in jeans and a t-shirt. I go to work that way (back-office corporate environment), and go to daily Mass after work. I absolutely hate having to wear a suit (or even a dress shirt), and I feel thoroughly uncomfortable wearing one - I think it’s better to go to Mass in jeans than to not go because you can’t stand more than five minutes with a dress shirt on.

I don’t think it’s a sign of disrespect to God because I don’t express my respect through clothing: a lot of people point out the fact that you go to a job interview in a suit and tie - yes, I do, but not because of the respect I have for the interviewer, but because I know that’s what he/she expects and I might not get the job otherwise. I don’t God expects a suit and tie from me, and won’t give me salvation otherwise.

Considering that jeans can cost much more than some dress shirts, it’s really not about the cost, is it? Jeans have become the dress of the culture, so it’s not a big deal if people wear them to Mass, IMHO. I only think that torn ones or ones that ride too low or are too tight really aren’t appropriate for Mass. I say wear what makes you feel comfortable, as long as it’s appropriately modest and in decent condition. But if all one has is torn clothes, do come anyway.

 

[Gicutzu]

Considering that jeans can cost much more than some dress shirts, it’s really not about the cost, is it? Jeans have become the dress of the culture, so it’s not a big deal if people wear them to Mass, IMHO. I only think that torn ones or ones that ride too low or are too tight really aren’t appropriate for Mass. I say wear what makes you feel comfortable, as long as it’s appropriately modest and in decent condition. But if all one has is torn clothes, do come anyway.

I agree that the clothes have to be decent, so no torn/low-ride/extremely tight jeans (I don’t wear such jeans anyway, not even when off work), and no tight/low-cut shirts or short-shorts (or even very short skirts) for the ladies - they are distractions for fellow worshippers, and may even cause impure thoughts.

That being said, I don’t see the need for suits/ties/dress shirts/slacks, especially when someone feels uncomfortable wearing such attire.

 

[Della]

I agree that the clothes have to be decent, so no torn/low-ride/extremely tight jeans (I don’t wear such jeans anyway, not even when off work), and no tight/low-cut shirts or short-shorts (or even very short skirts) for the ladies - they are distractions for fellow worshippers, and may even cause impure thoughts.

That being said, I don’t see the need for suits/ties/dress shirts/slacks, especially when someone feels uncomfortable wearing such attire.

It’s funny, but many who think they don’t like a certain type of clothing find they like them if they try them on. The show “What Not to Wear” often features gals who dress too casually for their job or quite sloppy, thinking they would feel constrained in “dress” clothes only to find that once they actually put on a few dress blouses/slacks that they are just as comfortable as jeans or jogging pants and tees.

If the collar is too tight on a dress shirt, then it’s not the right size for you. If the material is not comfortable, there are shirts that are made of other materials. What I’m saying is to give some other kinds of clothes a chance and you may be surprised at your reaction to them. I’m not telling you how to dress for Mass or anything else, mind. I just think you may not have found clothes that fit right or that are the right material. If you go to a good men’s wear shop the assistants will help you find things that both fit and that you like–that’s their job.

 

[Cath4life]

I feel the same way. I feel like I should dress for the King of Kings!! And also, what if by some chance He happens to really pay us a visit to our parish in person! I will want to be ready and dressed respectfully if that happens.

I also try to sit up front and keep focus on the altar, so that I don’t look around at what everybody else is wearing. So far so good, it’s been working ok. The challenge at my parish is with the way some of the Extraordinary Ministers of Comunion wear. It is the biggest challenge not to notice. I am trying very hard not to be judgmental, but shorts/jeans, low cut tops/tank tops and sneakers??? arrrghhhh I guess that’s a whole other post…LOL…

 

[TiggerS]

I wonder if we should rejoice and give thanks that our brothers and sisters are present at Mass with us to celebrate The Blessed Eucharist in days when numbers dwindle, rather than be critical of their apparel and even their attitudes which latter is only speculation. There may be many reasons indeed why people come to Mass dressed as they are.

We are all sinners and fail somewhere or other. Another’s fault may not be mine - but then I have faults of another nature. All our faults and failings, obvious or not, bring The Church down. As Pope Benedict said not all that long ago, we have only to fear the sins of our own membership HERE

This is what Jesus has to say:
Judge not, that you be not judged. For with the judgment you pronounce you will be judged, and the measure you give will be the measure you get. Why do you see the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when there is the log in your own eye? (Matt 7:1-4)

The “log” in our own eye is probably that we notice the “speck” in the other in the first place and then feel that we do have the right to be critical/judgemental and it just might be rash judgement at that, against which the CCC speaks. That is really an offence.

If one is really upset about something happening in the parishes, then bring it to the parish priest’s attention and let him make the decision about what is to be done. Failing that, then alert one’s diocesan authority. Let rightful authority make decisions.