Right.
I think that is what GaryTaylor was getting at. IF fertility control is permitted to be used because of a difficult situation, that Catholics & Orthodox would generally agree that NFP would be a preferred method over the other permissible options.NFP is very often used as a method of enhancing one’s chances of conceiving and I have never, ever heard that a dispensation is necessary, regardless of the purpose for which it is being used.Right.
Figuring out when conception is most likely is not problematic. The opposite use (i.e., “spacing out births”), however, should probably be accompanied by spiritual direction, in order to ensure that the goal is not to avoid having children entirely.
I have a question, do you believe that the same level of spiritual direction would be necessary for a couple planning on complete abstinance because they wish to space children?
Yes. Ideally, all practices of asceticism, like fasting, abstaining from marital relations, performing a number of prostrations daily, a daily rule of prayer, etc., should only be done with guidance. Spouses attempting complete abstinence from marital relations for the purpose of spacing out births should most definitely seek spiritual guidance, for a variety of reasons.
Must be a very “serious reason” for a Catholic couple to use NFP for the purpose of delaying or preventing the next conception? Wouldn’t the couple go to their priest for discernment of their situation to know if it is a “serious situation” they are experiencing? Or is Catholic couple left to their own devices without the assistance of the Church?
Yes. Definitely. Complete abstinence might benefit one couple but destroy another even if they have good intentions. Spiritual direction is needed.
The consultation with a priest is always available and I would think beneficial in such a case. Unfortunately I don’t believe enough couples take advantage of it.
Sounds like a great way to handle it.
I can’t argue with that.
Thanks that is interesting.
For Catholics it is not that they are left on their own without any assistance from the church, but moreso that they (or at least Western Catholics) tend to only speak with their priest about more troubling issues. So, for instance, a couple could be under extreme financial pressure and both decide that it would be imprudent, perhaps even reckless, to have another child right then, and so mutually agree to practice NFP (or complete abstinance… but I believe that is more uncommon). Neither spouse has any doubts that they have a serious reason to avoid so it is unlikely they would consult a priest as to whether or not they should avoid a child. However, that doesn’t mean that spiritual guidance isn’t available for those who want it, it just sounds as though Catholics are more willing to trust their own conclusions (often after much thought and prayer) and so seek spiritual guidance less frequently.
Mickey,
I see what you’re saying that the couple feel they are under extreme financial pressure and make that decision without the priest.Thanks that is interesting.
For Catholics it is not that they are left on their own without any assistance from the church, but moreso that they (or at least Western Catholics) tend to only speak with their priest about more troubling issues. So, for instance, a couple could be under extreme financial pressure and both decide that it would be imprudent, perhaps even reckless, to have another child right then, and so mutually agree to practice NFP (or complete abstinance… but I believe that is more uncommon). Neither spouse has any doubts that they have a serious reason to avoid so it is unlikely they would consult a priest as to whether or not they should avoid a child. However, that doesn’t mean that spiritual guidance isn’t available for those who want it, it just sounds as though Catholics are more willing to trust their own conclusions (often after much thought and prayer) and so seek spiritual guidance less frequently.
I understand that of course. I’m not saying each couple always have the right answers, just trying to help explain the difference in mentality.
I think it also comes from realizing that priests are also human and also make errors in judgement. If a priest were to advise you not to abstain even though it was justified in your situation, and really the only good option, because he made an error in judgement would it not be better for the couple to abstain? This is the kind of thought that leads people to make decisions on their own. That a couple make a mistake, or act out of selfishness is always a possibility, but this is hardly the only area of their life where such a danger exists. We are at risk of acting selfishly in every area of our lives, we have the responsibility to ensure we avoid selfishness in all aspects of our lives yet we do not consult a priest with every decision that we need to make to ensure that we are not acting out of selfishness. If we can be trusted with the responsibility to recognize selfishness in other areas of our lives I guess it just seems odd to assume that we cannot be trusted with the responsibility of recognizing and avoiding selfishness with respect to children. Again, I am not trying to say it is wrong to speak to a priest or spiritual father, but am just trying to explain the differences in approach. In Catholicism the ultimate responsibility always rests with the individual. That is not to say that others don’t also have responsibilities, priests are responsible for their flock, spouses for each other, parents for their children etc, but ultimately each individual must make the right choice. For Catholics this line of thought extends into the area of avoiding conception, priests must teach their parishoners the importance of avoiding selfishness ( and the sinfulness of ABC 
) and encourage them to carefully examine whether or not they are acting out of selfishness, he might even come out and say he does not think they should abstain because he thinks it is motivated by selfishness, but ultimately it is the couples responsibility to avoid being selfish. So they can come to their priest for guidance, but it is not required. It is certainly a different mindset, but I do not think completely incompatible. Mickey,
The Church does not specifically define what constitutes a serious reason for delaying pregnancy. Of course, couples are expected to speak openly about their situation, discern properly, pray, and also as you mentioned, to speak with their priest.
In fact ‘fertility control’ does not arise in NFP. Basically NFP is approved by the Church because it does not employ physical barrier to fertilization or stops ovulation as in the case of condoms and ABC pills. Fertility control is a bonus if it helps the couple to have children.
Yes, there are differences to the understanding and approach.
Temporary or Permanent Abstinence, Condoms, Sponge and Cervical Cap all “control fertility” by preventing fertilization from occurring in the first place. Vasectomy & Tying Tubs also “control fertility” by way of preventing fertilization from occurring in the first place, but unlike the other options they do maime the body.
Sure but the Church’s definition of birth control is roughly artificial barrier or prevention of fertilization by artificial means. If these methods are employed then they are not allowed. Voluntary abstinence is allowed as it does not infringe upon the said prohibition. That’s how the Church sees it. Of course there are people who disagree but that’s their right of freedom of choice. Catholics have to obey the Church’s sanction nevertheless.
I would add that another big reason, perhaps the biggest, that NFP is approved by the Church is because it works with God’s design in the natural cycle that women go through. And, as you mentioned, can be used just as easily to increase the likelihood of conception as to delay or prevent.