Engaged and unsure

[The_Old_Maid]

Others have strongly suggested bringing this to your confessor. I tend to agree. It is not a boyfriend’s place to impose Penance. In my opinion, it’s a little abnormal that he would try.

It also means that if your Table of Five [Man, his parents, and your parents] are distressed enough to derail the conversation, you can respond firmly, “I’ve confessed and done penance.” Before they can reply, you then move on to the next item on the agenda.

Maybe your Table of Five should be a Table of Six, by adding a priest whom you trust.

And we will see each other in Heaven.

EDIT: I don’t intend to imply that [Man] would not go to Heaven. That’s still up to him. Although in my opinion, trying to shame a woman into marriage isn’t exactly the stuff of which halos are made.

Rather, I meant that in Heaven we would naturally look for those closest to our hearts, and then maybe to people we’ve always wanted to meet. “Some guy I sinned with in college 80 years ago” probably wouldn’t make the top 20 of our priority list, is all I meant.

 

[jzea1992]

Very relatable. This is the reason why I will not
get married. If I feel any major doubt then I simply will not get married. I have seen the negative aftermath of this throughout my life.

 

[The_Old_Maid]

I’ve seen some disturbing marriages too. And I’ve seen some wonderful marriages. As I grew old enough to choose for myself, as opposed to Anything-but-That, I discerned my calling to be perpetually celibate. There is a difference.

To the believer, marriage is a shadow and type of the love between Christ and His Church. Marriage is a blessing, a calling, a common grace, and a great gift. I absolutely agree that it is not to be squandered on the wrong person.