Father letting me suffer; the Church seems to be wrong

[CatholicRaven]

You are strong to have borne your sufferings for so long. I admire your tenacity! And you are, understandably, tired. But the battle is not over yet; the fight is still on, and you are needed. And though you long for surrender, you must know that surrender would be worse than all of your suffering. You’ve worked and prayed for so long and come so far–don’t let it all be in vain by waving the white flag now!

Don’t lose sight of the real goal, which is NOT the healing of your body, but the healing of your SOUL. Do not make the mistake of thinking one is equal to the other–it’s a mind trick that the enemy uses to make us overlook the REAL battle waging inside us. It’s an easy trap to fall into; be careful!

The enemy wants to distract you from your true mission by trying to convince you that your Commander doesn’t care about you, doesn’t know what He is doing, or doesn’t exist! The enemy will try to wear you down; he is persistent and cunning. The enemy will plague you with propaganda and batter you with lies, especially if they begin to work! He will tell you that if your Commander really loved you, He would do THIS or THAT specific thing for you, and since THIS or THAT has not happened, He must not care about you. The enemy will tell you that if your Commander really loved you, He would let you go home so you would not have to fight any more… leaving out that if you give up and go “home,” you would soon find that you no longer have a “home” because the enemy has taken over everything that you had been defending!

The enemy wants you to believe that your struggles (some or all of them) are “unnecessary,” that you will lose, that you should give up now, that you are not really important in the battle, anyway. He will tell you that your mission has already failed, and give you reasons why you should believe it is so. He will try to keep you away from that which helps sustain you and prepare you for the next battle (such as Mass). He is trying to wear you down with his lies–but remember, he would not bother with you if you were not a strong enough soldier to stand against him. He only does this because he knows the truth: that he has not yet won the fight–that you can still defeat him (with God’s grace)!

Stand strong, remember your mission. Remember, even though it may sometimes seem as if there was a better way to win this fight, “if I was in charge,” you can only see this ONE battle in ONE place in time. Remember that the Commander sees ALL of the battles from start to finish; He knows what is happening throughout the whole WAR, and you do not. He knows better than you, even what you can truly handle and what you really need (not just what you think you need). Trust that He has placed you where you are most needed, He has given you all that you need to get through your mission, and He knows that you are stronger than you think you are.

This is not to make light of your struggles; not at all. In fact, I think your struggles may be greater than you have described here–in particular, the emotional and intellectual ones. Yet God will grant you all you need for the mission He sent you to do (not the mission the enemy will try to convince you is yours to distract you). Generally, God does not call the equipped; He equips the called.

I will pray for you.

 

[CarmelJerome]

For someone who is suffering so terribly you seem to write very rigorously, clearly, with set arguments and determination. St. Teresa of Jesus frequently suffered from headaches and roaring in her ears but was obliged by her spiritual directors to write; she chides herself many times in the course we of her writing for not always being able to get to her point.
There is a malice towards God in you - not failure of faith but something worse than merely personal pain. You don't need deliverance from pain because the love of God would bring grace to bear pain whether you felt the presence of God or seemed to hear Him answer. Your revulsion at seeing the Host is an indication of something in the order of evil spirits - not possession but certainly an ill thing which precedes the pain and the arguments.

 

[oneofmany]

Since today was a particularly special Sunday, the Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed (All Souls), I thought God might finally heal me, as I’ve been praying since around February (a miracle of St. Thomas Aquinas’ third category, a natural phenomena occurring out of its usual time or order of occurrence). I thought perhaps God would find it a fitting occasion for the Venerable person whose intercession I’m requesting to “come out of purgatory” (enter heaven properly), if that person is still being purified, and grant this healing as a sign.

Instead, I got a headache during Mass, which lasted most of the day.

I don’t understand why God has refused to heal me, or why God makes me suffer even more, as if to spite my faith. (Yes, God is responsible for my headache, because God is the one holding all things in existence at every moment. If God did not continue to cause my headache for its duration, my headache would have ceased to exist, according to Frank Sheed.) My only explanation is that it hasn’t been a full year yet, that there may be some other day more significant for my intercessor. Nonetheless, my suffering and the absolute silence of God tempts me very strongly to think the Church is wrong about God being my Heavenly Father, about God existing at all. Some time ago I sat down and wrote an exhaustive essay on why I was a Christian, building the strongest case I could, and discovered that all of my arguments rest on uncertain premises, e.g. the Resurrection, or the recent miracles affirming the Church’s message like the Miracle of the Sun of Our Lady of Fatima, or those for which Pope John Paul II was canonized. I would find the case for atheism to be equally strong, except that, in light of this suffering, the case for atheism comes out stronger.

The more I seek God, the more I notice His absence; the more I “believe I will be healed”, as Jesus commands us as a prerequisite condition, the more I am let-down and disillusioned. For this reason I have stopped attending Daily Mass: It is too painful, and I can no longer bear to be disappointed by God. I think I could bear it if God would explain to me why (as people are quick to point out He did for St. Paul), but the only things God has said to me are those writings the Church says He’s responsible for, writings which led me to think God would heal me in the first place, because Jesus quite literally says that He will.

What should I do? I’m rather heart-broken. I’ve tried praying, sitting quietly before His Presence in the Tabernacle, and only one of two things happens: Nothing, or I become drowsy (because I have trouble sleeping at night). At this point, I am like Peter walking on the water – all evidence suggests the contrary is true – except I can’t see Jesus, have started my trek at the bidding of others, and I am suffering.

I’m not sure what your illness is but just sitting there asking God to heal you may not be what you should ask for. If you don’t know why you are in pain, I hope you have had a thorough physical. God helps those who help themselves. He does not come down and take you to the doctor, you need to get there and find out about your health problems, then do what the doctor prescribes.

If you have done many things to get well under a doctor’s directions and are still sick than ask God to help you find someone who can help you get better.

 

[ethereality]

Here is a link to an article about suffering, that may help explain things to you a little bit better than I can:

integratedcatholiclife.org/2011/07/bickerstaff-why-does-god-allow-suffering/

Some responses to this article…
Deacon Michael Bickerstaff:

I sometimes think that it is the absence of this knowledge, despite God’s Divine Revelation lovingly given to us over the centuries, which seems to allow the Seven Deadly Sins to give rise to so much personal sin in our lives. Our priorities and the self-absorption from which they derive, tells me this is so. Of course this is our failure, not the Lord’s.

This conclusion is not clear from what he has written: He has said that our lack of infused knowledge, due to the sin of Adam and Eve, is responsible for our misguided priorities etc. It is thus a non sequitur to say it’s “our fault” – following his logic, it’s indeed the Lord’s fault, namely, for refusing us infused knowledge after giving it to Adam and Eve, who squandered it. I’m not saying this is true; I’m only pointing out a flaw in his writing (because I’m frustrated to be asked to read flawed arguments)…
Deacon Michael Bickerstaff:

But we can see in our history that God can make use of the absence of good for our benefit. Indeed, what we sometimes see as “not good” is instead a good thing.

He says “Indeed,” where he should have given an example. I cannot think of a single instance of something “not good” that turned out to be good in hindsight.
Deacon Michael Bickerstaff:

The present world is passing and in the life to come all things will be set right.

Christians have been saying that for two thousand years (and, moreover, it looks like society hasn’t changed much) – what do they think “passing” means?

 

[savedbygrace71]

I suppose I must forgive you, for I think you are the one being presumptuous to suppose that my suffering is less than yours or theirs. I wish I had cancer, so I could die and leave this not-worth-living miserable life sooner. Your post is also a near occasion of sin, because apart from telling me of your prayer, you’ve strengthened the argument for atheism insofar as you’ve implied that God is an incompetent father. “Look at all the suffering in the world!” is not a good thing to say if trying to convince someone of Christian doctrine.

No, what I’m trying to get you to understand is that everyone prays for healing and help, and that help comes in ways that you don’t seem to see right now. When I have a particularly debilitating headache, I know now not to pray, “please God take away this headache” because that just doesn’t work. I have a neurological illness and that isn’t going to change. Instead, I pray for strength, for calm, for Jesus to stay with me. I pray for St. Theresa of Avila to pray for me as she understands this pain. I pray that my doctors can help me. It helps me work through the pain. I can sometimes get to the point that I offer it up for someone else, but this is a skill I’m still working on

When my friend’s daughter was ill with cancer I prayed that her doctors would work skillfully, would help lessen her suffering. Of course we all prayed for a miracle, too, but in the end when it didn’t happen, we prayed for the family to feel the love and peace of the Lord around them.

Don’t you see that if prayers from the righteous believers removed all suffering, the world would be a very different place? Think of all those we pray for all the time! Cancer wouldn’t exist. Heck even cramps wouldn’t. The children being killed in Syria and Iraq right now, I’m been praying constantly for them- the families with Ebola in west Africa- it would be gone. Prayer doesn’t change the ugly facts of the world, it changes how we deal with them.

I’m sorry, I know that you desperately want to be healed of your pain. I don’t know your story, it sounds as though you were injured? I wish you all the best. But in your anger you are missing a chance for peace. Please, quietly take some time to pray for that instead of healing your physical body. Start with the healing of your spirit and your mind, and acceptance of what is.

Watch, O Lord with those who wake, or watch, or weep tonight, and give your angels charge over those who sleep.
Tend your sick ones, O Lord Christ.
Rest your weary ones.
Bless your dying ones.
Soothe your suffering ones.
Pity your afflicted ones.
Shield your joyous ones.
And for all your love’s sake. Amen.

 

[tamedlion]

Ethereality:
I read the comments on this thread and you answer most of them, that’s impressive, thank you for taking the time to read mine!. But to tell you the truth, I really don’t think that there’s nothing anybody can tell you to make you think any different than what’s on your mind, so I will tell you what my protestant friend tells me all the time, “YOU NEED JESUS”. As for me, I will pray for you! God bless you.

 

[fred_conty]

Here is a story from another thread.

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=918911
“I haven’t had an experience like this but a similar one with my sister who had brittle bones and 42 fractures by high school. A VERY HOLY priest told my dad who was taking lessons in the Catholic faith, not to worry. His little girl would be ok… she wasn’t supposed to live past 12… she’s 67 now!”

May the Lord be good to you.

 

[Pat_Albertson]

Since today was a particularly special Sunday, the Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed (All Souls), I thought God might finally heal me, as I’ve been praying since around February (a miracle of St. Thomas Aquinas’ third category, a natural phenomena occurring out of its usual time or order of occurrence). I thought perhaps God would find it a fitting occasion for the Venerable person whose intercession I’m requesting to “come out of purgatory” (enter heaven properly), if that person is still being purified, and grant this healing as a sign.

Instead, I got a headache during Mass, which lasted most of the day.

I don’t understand why God has refused to heal me, or why God makes me suffer even more, as if to spite my faith. (Yes, God is responsible for my headache, because God is the one holding all things in existence at every moment. If God did not continue to cause my headache for its duration, my headache would have ceased to exist, according to Frank Sheed.) My only explanation is that it hasn’t been a full year yet, that there may be some other day more significant for my intercessor. Nonetheless, my suffering and the absolute silence of God tempts me very strongly to think the Church is wrong about God being my Heavenly Father, about God existing at all. Some time ago I sat down and wrote an exhaustive essay on why I was a Christian, building the strongest case I could, and discovered that all of my arguments rest on uncertain premises, e.g. the Resurrection, or the recent miracles affirming the Church’s message like the Miracle of the Sun of Our Lady of Fatima, or those for which Pope John Paul II was canonized. I would find the case for atheism to be equally strong, except that, in light of this suffering, the case for atheism comes out stronger.

The more I seek God, the more I notice His absence; the more I “believe I will be healed”, as Jesus commands us as a prerequisite condition, the more I am let-down and disillusioned. For this reason I have stopped attending Daily Mass: It is too painful, and I can no longer bear to be disappointed by God. I think I could bear it if God would explain to me why (as people are quick to point out He did for St. Paul), but the only things God has said to me are those writings the Church says He’s responsible for, writings which led me to think God would heal me in the first place, because Jesus quite literally says that He will.

What should I do? I’m rather heart-broken. I’ve tried praying, sitting quietly before His Presence in the Tabernacle, and only one of two things happens: Nothing, or I become drowsy (because I have trouble sleeping at night). At this point, I am like Peter walking on the water – all evidence suggests the contrary is true – except I can’t see Jesus, have started my trek at the bidding of others, and I am suffering.

Perhaps you are suffering from RAS, Rigid Attention Syndrome. It might be that you are responsible for your suffering, and not God.

I have not finished the book yet, and I have difficulty with some of the exercises, but I have hopes based on some of my own preliminary reactions that I might yet stop or lessen some of my own pains by altering the way I pay attention to the things around me.

Here is the book: Dissolving Pain: Simple Brain-Training Exercises for Overcoming Chronic Pain

It also comes with a CD which I have not listened to as yet. I have been waiting for a time when I did not feel pressured to do anything before I tried listening to it. Perhaps this evening after yet another visit to the dentist . . .

And, speaking of dentists, watch this: Sharon Waxkirsh - Wisdom Tooth Extraction Under Self Hypnosis

She’s a professional hypnotist, and here she’s doing the “physician heal thyself” thing.

Is hypnosis exactly the same thing as Dissolving Pain? No, not quite, but there are similarities.

 

[ethereality]

Where do you get this idea that we must “appease” God by suffering?

From the responses here, with things like “we must suffer with Christ in order to arise with Christ”, that we must suffer before God will let us into heaven, or that we must suffer so that poor sinners will be forgiven and given the grace needed to amend their lives. This latter idea is particularly sick, that God would require an innocent person to suffer before He’d help a guilty person stop sinning, yet Our Lady of Fatima seems to teach it emphatically, “do penance for poor sinners; many go to hell because no one is praying for them”. There’s talk about “victim souls” and so on.

This is the thing that you must seek to learn…and I am afraid that we here are not really able to help much in this. You likely need the help of a spiritual director - possibly a regular confessor and/or your pastor.

I’ve already read a ton of books, and I’ve already explained my situation regarding spiritual direction.

 

[ethereality]

None of us is as saintly as St. Paul, yet he did not receive healing for whatever his problem was.

He was given an explanation, however. Moreover, as apparent in his writings, God gave him the grace to be happy, together with this explanation, without the healing. It seems God has given me neither explanation nor the grace to be happy.

However, perhaps He has given me an explanation: That I must wait for the proper time, and after growing more in holiness and wisdom.

Throughout the centuries there have been many, many saints who were not healed of their ailments. What makes you or I more worthy of healing?

Your general question (assuming its premise to be correct) must be answered in general: Perhaps they didn’t do as Jesus instructed regarding healing (e.g., believe that they would receive it, pray with the agreement of others, have faith).

 

[JRKH]

From the responses here, with things like “we must suffer with Christ in order to arise with Christ”, that we must suffer before God will let us into heaven, or that we must suffer so that poor sinners will be forgiven and given the grace needed to amend their lives. This latter idea is particularly sick, that God would require an innocent person to suffer before He’d help a guilty person stop sinning, yet Our Lady of Fatima seems to teach it emphatically, “do penance for poor sinners; many go to hell because no one is praying for them”. There’s talk about “victim souls” and so on.

Yes - I can see how someone might get that impression…but it is a wrong one.

While these things can all be true, none of them are about “appeasing” God by suffering.
For example…doing penance for poor souls need not be about “suffering”, but about being a good example to others. Of course being a good example can result in ridicule and so forth which is a form of suffering I suppose…but it is suffering for the kingdom to to “appease” God.

Some of the other forms of suffering are, as we have already shared, ways to grow in holiness and to come closer to God and to Christ.

Peace
James

 

[ethereality]

There is a malice towards God in you

Perhaps it is like a child whose parents won’t give him what he wants. However, I say “is like”, not “is”, because I am not asking for a new toy, or a special privilege: I am asking for a normal functioning body, one most others have. Moreover, our Father said He would give us good things if we ask, and surely a normal functioning body, which He’s given to others, is a good thing.

“Okay,” you may say, “but that explains only resentment, not malice.” To account for the sharp edge of my complaints – I think ‘malice’ is too strong a word – consider that it is the only means I have left to fight my suffering. Acceptance doesn’t stop the pain, and prayer results in mental anguish (since God does not answer); basking in the warmth of a logical argument gives me at least momentary respite. Perhaps more practically, I’m taking out my anger regarding this evil world on the God who holds it in existence and allows it to happen. More bluntly, God is the one responsible for my pain, so if I am to relate to Him at all, I must relate to him on a human level – and that means yelling for him to knock it off already.

You don’t need deliverance from pain because the love of God would bring grace to bear pain whether you felt the presence of God or seemed to hear Him answer.

This is a very strange statement. Surely I have this grace, because I haven’t killed myself yet, as I said previously – i.e., I have been bearing it. The question is whether I ought to be miserable and wishing I were dead. For you to say I “don’t need deliverance from pain”, you seem to think the answer is, ‘Yes.’

Your revulsion at seeing the Host is an indication of something in the order of evil spirits - not possession but certainly an ill thing which precedes the pain and the arguments.

You’ve misunderstood what I wrote. I said nothing of demonic revulsion: I was expressing bitter disappointment at wanting Jesus, yet receiving only the appearance of bread; wanting conversation with God, instead speaking out to be met with an empty room; to hope for healing, only to receive additional pain.

 

[ethereality]

Don’t you see that if prayers from the righteous believers removed all suffering, the world would be a very different place? [Problems wouldn’t exist.] Prayer doesn’t change the ugly facts of the world, it changes how we deal with them.

If that is what you want me to believe, then you must explain away the Bible that contradicts you:
Matthew 7:

7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. 9 Which one of you would hand his son a stone when he asks for a loaf of bread, 10 or a snake when he asks for a fish? 11 If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good things to those who ask him.

Matthew 18:

19 Again, [amen,] I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything for which they are to pray, it shall be granted to them by my heavenly Father. 20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.”

Mark 11:

22 Jesus said to them in reply, “Have faith in God. 23 Amen, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be lifted up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it shall be done for him. 24 Therefore I tell you, all that you ask for in prayer, believe that you will receive it and it shall be yours. 25 When you stand to pray, forgive anyone against whom you have a grievance, so that your heavenly Father may in turn forgive you your transgressions.”

Luke 11:

5 And he said to them, “Suppose one of you has a friend to whom he goes at midnight and says, ‘Friend, lend me three loaves of bread, 6 for a friend of mine has arrived at my house from a journey and I have nothing to offer him,’ 7 and he says in reply from within, ‘Do not bother me; the door has already been locked and my children and I are already in bed. I cannot get up to give you anything.’ 8 I tell you, if he does not get up to give him the loaves because of their friendship, he will get up to give him whatever he needs because of his persistence. 9 “And I tell you, ask and you will receive; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 10 For everyone who asks, receives; and the one who seeks, finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. 11 What father among you would hand his son a snake when he asks for a fish? 12 Or hand him a scorpion when he asks for an egg? 13 If you then, who are wicked, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the Father in heaven give the holy Spirit to those who ask him?”

Luke 15:

29 He said to his father in reply, ‘Look, all these years I served you and not once did I disobey your orders; yet you never gave me even a young goat to feast on with my friends. 30 But when your son returns who swallowed up your property with prostitutes, for him you slaughter the fattened calf.’ 31 He said to him, ‘My son, you are here with me always; everything I have is yours.

Luke 18:

1 Then he told them a parable about the necessity for them to pray always without becoming weary. He said, 2 “There was a judge in a certain town who neither feared God nor respected any human being. 3 And a widow in that town used to come to him and say, ‘Render a just decision for me against my adversary.’ 4 For a long time the judge was unwilling, but eventually he thought, ‘While it is true that I neither fear God nor respect any human being, 5 because this widow keeps bothering me I shall deliver a just decision for her lest she finally come and strike me.’” 6 The Lord said, “Pay attention to what the dishonest judge says. 7 Will not God then secure the rights of his chosen ones who call out to him day and night? Will he be slow to answer them? 8 I tell you, he will see to it that justice is done for them speedily. But when the Son of Man comes, will he find faith on earth?”

1 John 3:

21 Beloved, if [our] hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence in God 22 and receive from him whatever we ask, because we keep his commandments and do what pleases him.

1 John 5:

14 And we have this confidence in him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. 15 And if we know that he hears us in regard to whatever we ask, we know that what we have asked him for is ours.

What you are suggesting is contrary to these texts. Put another way, if you are correct, then at best, God doesn’t say what He means; at worst, Jesus is a liar and the Apostles are unreliable. Please, clarify; correct any misunderstandings I may have. What is your exegesis that vindicates your position that I should abandon hope for and faith in the healing Jesus has promised?

I’m sorry, I know that you desperately want to be healed of your pain. I don’t know your story, it sounds as though you were injured?

What question are you asking me? Yes, I have been injured, and it was deliberately inflicted upon me.

in your anger you are missing a chance for peace.

Anger comes and goes, as does peace. The larger issue is that my suffering interferes with daily tasks, and diminishes the possibility the potential of potential future happiness.

pray for [peace] instead of healing your physical body

I don’t see that this is a dichotomy; it seems that you think it is because you don’t believe God will heal people, contrary to the passages I have quoted.

 

[ethereality]

I really don’t think that there’s [anything] anybody can tell you to make you think any different than what’s on your mind,

So you think I’m correct? All I need to change my mind are facts or explanations of any misunderstandings I may have.

YOU NEED JESUS

Haven’t I been saying the same? Haven’t I been expressing my bitter disappointment, nearly despair, at His absence, even in the Eucharist?

As for me, I will pray for you! God bless you.

Thanks.

 

[ethereality]

Here is a story from another thread.

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=918911

Fred, this strengthens my argument: If blessed water can heal, then how much more should the Eucharist bring healing to one with faith, since the Eucharist is the One who blesses that water! Previously I’ve quoted the Bible, instead of the anecdote you cite, to elucidate this point:

20 A woman suffering hemorrhages for twelve years came up behind him and touched the tassel on his cloak. 21 She said to herself, “If only I can touch his cloak, I shall be cured.” 22 Jesus turned around and saw her, and said, “Courage, daughter! Your faith has saved you.” And from that hour the woman was cured.

If someone with faith can be healed by touching a tassel, then how much more should we be healed – again, if we have faith and do as Jesus says – by receiving the One wearing the tassel!

So from my reading of the Bible, it’s only a matter of time before God heals me. If God does not heal me, if God has no intention of healing me, as others here have suggested, then they must explain not only how I am misunderstanding the text, but why Jesus flatly says what He does not mean (as I’ve quoted earlier).

I mentioned atheism earlier because it is the only other explanation I see, if God doesn’t heal me, because I can see no other way of interpreting the texts I’ve quoted. However, to say once more, I think it is only a matter of time – both for me to grow in holiness, and for whatever day pertinent to the Church and my intercessor that God is waiting for.

 

[ethereality]

Perhaps you are suffering from RAS, Rigid Attention Syndrome.

That thought has occurred to me. Moreover, if I abandon the hope that God will heal me, which requires abandoning God as well, I might be able to “get over” my pain as just a fact of life, i.e. pay it less attention and overcome this RAS. But, put another way, as I said earlier to oldgraymare, I can accomplish the same by simply “seeking first the kingdom of God” and focusing on my relationship with God. Yet it’s hard to focus on my relationship with God and not mention His having not healed me. On a very human level, He said He would do it, I need it done, and so I’m waiting for Him to do it. Kind of like, “Dad, you said you would take me to the dentist, and my tooth isn’t going to get better until you do. So when are you going to do it?”

Here is the book: Dissolving Pain: Simple Brain-Training Exercises for Overcoming Chronic Pain

Thanks. I doubt I’ll read it any time soon (can’t afford it and don’t have time), but it’s on my list, if the opportunity ever arises.

 

[Alex_Swol]

Well, Ethereality my dear, the best that I can tell you is that I understand your situation much better than you think that I do. Ethereality, I have read your
post 3 times and I still come away with the feeling that you expect too much. Forgive me if
I am being like a mother hen and telling you what you should NOT be doing. Jesus wants HIS
children happy, but HE cannot do it for us. WE must LET GO AND LET GOD as the quote
goes.
Are YOU helping yourself? You sound as tho you are wallowing in self-pity and if you are
that is not going to help. LOOK AROUND YOU AND SEE THE BEAUTY IN LIFE. FIND THE
GOOD THINGS ABOUT YOUR LIFE TO BE THANKFUL FOR. STOP THIS NONSENCE.
You want to know about PAIN? I can tell you about pain and broken dreams and most
importantly, I can tell you about suffering. How would YOU like to be wheelchair bound due
to surgery that went wrong? All the plans my husband and I had for our retirement went out
the window along with all our savings. In a split second, our lives changed and not for the
good. Did we accuse our Heavenly Father? Of course not. WE ACCEPTED WHAT HAD
TO BE AND WENT ON WITH OUR LIVES. Could YOU accept a Doctor telling YOU that
you “WILL NEVER WALK AGAIN”? Think about it!!!
I can only tell you that your life is a gift and what YOU do with it is your problem and it
seems to me that you do not want to do much but give up. Stop being a coward and get
up and get going. LIVE, LAUGH AND LOVE. You are in my prayers. Know that I love you.
Peace, A

You see, I was in an accident quite some time ago now, that wasn’t even my fault. I have damaged joints as a result of it, that can’t rejuvenate themselves.

I understand your wanting to be healed. However, God doesn’t always answer those prayers. And, as I keep sharing with you, God is in control, and will chose the way that He decides to do things.

In my case with my health issues, He works through the health providers that are working with me, and guides them. That is how He answers my prayers, in particular.

And, He absolutely works through other people. How do you think He accomplished all that He did through the things that we read about in sacred Scripture? You don’t have to answer this–it is a rhetorical question.

So many of us here it seems, are trying to tell you about “redemptive suffering,” where you can unite your suffering with our Dear Lord’s suffering on the Cross.

I understand your being upset and angry about your injuries/illnesses. Perhaps you still need to grieve for them. ((Hugs)) for you. :hug1:

I had to go through a grieving period, after I was injured, too.

I am so sorry that you feel miserable, and that you hate your life.

Why not just keep talking to God about everything, and keep telling Him your feelings–that you are angry, upset–however you are feeling–just like you are telling us here.

I know how difficult it is, dealing with illnesses and injuries and pain. I live with it 24/7. It never stops for me, but I make sure and offer my suffering back to the Lord on the Cross.

Here is a link to an article about suffering, that may help explain things to you a little bit better than I can:

integratedcatholiclife.org/2011/07/bickerstaff-why-does-god-allow-suffering/

Prayers said for you, dear one.

I care about what is happening to you. Take heart, and don’t give up. Hang in there, and let us know how you are doing.

 

[blueshells]

Since today was a particularly special Sunday, the Commemoration of All the Faithful Departed (All Souls), I thought God might finally heal me, as I’ve been praying since around February (a miracle of St. Thomas Aquinas’ third category, a natural phenomena occurring out of its usual time or order of occurrence). I thought perhaps God would find it a fitting occasion for the Venerable person whose intercession I’m requesting to “come out of purgatory” (enter heaven properly), if that person is still being purified, and grant this healing as a sign.

Instead, I got a headache during Mass, which lasted most of the day.

I don’t understand why God has refused to heal me, or why God makes me suffer even more, as if to spite my faith. (Yes, God is responsible for my headache, because God is the one holding all things in existence at every moment. If God did not continue to cause my headache for its duration, my headache would have ceased to exist, according to Frank Sheed.) My only explanation is that it hasn’t been a full year yet, that there may be some other day more significant for my intercessor. Nonetheless, my suffering and the absolute silence of God tempts me very strongly to think the Church is wrong about God being my Heavenly Father, about God existing at all. Some time ago I sat down and wrote an exhaustive essay on why I was a Christian, building the strongest case I could, and discovered that all of my arguments rest on uncertain premises, e.g. the Resurrection, or the recent miracles affirming the Church’s message like the Miracle of the Sun of Our Lady of Fatima, or those for which Pope John Paul II was canonized. I would find the case for atheism to be equally strong, except that, in light of this suffering, the case for atheism comes out stronger.

The more I seek God, the more I notice His absence; the more I “believe I will be healed”, as Jesus commands us as a prerequisite condition, the more I am let-down and disillusioned. For this reason I have stopped attending Daily Mass: It is too painful, and I can no longer bear to be disappointed by God. I think I could bear it if God would explain to me why (as people are quick to point out He did for St. Paul), but the only things God has said to me are those writings the Church says He’s responsible for, writings which led me to think God would heal me in the first place, because Jesus quite literally says that He will.

What should I do? I’m rather heart-broken. I’ve tried praying, sitting quietly before His Presence in the Tabernacle, and only one of two things happens: Nothing, or I become drowsy (because I have trouble sleeping at night). At this point, I am like Peter walking on the water – all evidence suggests the contrary is true – except I can’t see Jesus, have started my trek at the bidding of others, and I am suffering.

Though it wasn’t pain, I had a period of several months where I suffered from severe idiopathic dermatographic urticaria; that is, I broke out into itchy hives anytime anything touched me, and scratching obviously only made things way worse. I had to take freezing cold showers to calm my immune system enough to be able to change my clothes or get into bed, people couldn’t touch me (a particular suffering for someone whose primary love language is touch) the medication that might have helped made me too sleepy to use, and I had to have an epi-pen in case the food I ate was too hard and made my throat swell shut. And the doctors had no idea why it was happening or what to do to make it go away.

What helped me most was praying for holy distractions while I waited for healing. Praying for ways and opportunities to serve God, knowing he wouldn’t ask more of me than I could handle in an itchy sleep deprived state, was a good way for me to stay busy and not just sit and stare at the Tabernacle checking my watch. Perhaps you need to leave your prayer for healing on the altar and let it be for a while, saying “Not my will, but Yours, Lord. Not my time, but yours, Lord.” Then go love on some other people, even something as simple as cultivating genuine friendship over coffee, and let Him love you through other people as well as through the Sacraments while you wait.

 

[CrossofChrist]

After reading through your article, CrossofChrist, I must say that I do not understand what “newness” I should be open to, unless you mean that by “doing something new” you mean, “God letting you suffer and expecting you to be content in your misery,”

I’m saying we can’t predict the future. You are in no position to know what God is going to do; you have to be open to anything. For all we know God will heal you the second after you read this post. Or maybe God will not heal you until you die. We just don’t know.

You mentioned how you anticipated being healed on a day that is significant or is significant to you. But how can you possibly know that’s when he’d heal you if he chooses to do so? You can’t. You just have to be open to what God wants of you.

If you are ever discouraged look to Jesus.

 

[savedbygrace71]

If that is what you want me to believe, then you must explain away the Bible that contradicts you:

What you are suggesting is contrary to these texts. Put another way, if you are correct, then at best, God doesn’t say what He means; at worst, Jesus is a liar and the Apostles are unreliable. Please, clarify; correct any misunderstandings I may have. What is your exegesis that vindicates your position that I should abandon hope for and faith in the healing Jesus has promised?
What question are you asking me? Yes, I have been injured, and it was deliberately inflicted upon me.
Anger comes and goes, as does peace. The larger issue is that my suffering interferes with daily tasks, and diminishes the possibility the potential of potential future happiness.
I don’t see that this is a dichotomy; it seems that you think it is because you don’t believe God will heal people, contrary to the passages I have quoted.

I’m sorry that I can’t be of more help. Millions of people have asked the question that you have: I am praying for something, why can’t I have it right now?? I certainly can’t be the one to give you an answer. I’m not a theologian, all I can say is what little peace I’ve come to on why my body isn’t in perfect health, regardless of how much I’ve prayed for my illnesses to go away.

The reason for my previous posts was simply to say, all faithful Christians pray constantly for things that don’t come true. Have we not all prayed for someone we love to get well, who instead died? Don’t we pray everyday to end abortion? To heal those who are suffering, including you? Just because we ask it doesn’t mean it is what is right, right for us, right for the world, right for things we don’t understand.

Don’t ask me why it might be better for you not to be healed. I don’t know. Perhaps, in the course of your struggles, you will meet someone or do something you may not even realize is significant, but which ends up being the whole purpose of your life. For example, somewhere you go to the doctor, or somewhere you happen to be as a consequence of your injuries. You may cross paths and cause something important to happen, or meet someone who will change your life. I know this is a bit of a stretch, but it held true for me.

For many years I struggled with a particular health issue and I begged, pleaded, bargained, prayed, endlessly with God. I wished on stars, candles, numbers, anything that would bring me “luck.” My situation only deteriorated. Over 10 years later, after accepting things as they were, and making peace with it,I was in a different place in my life. Then, surprisingly, my health changed. I’m not suggesting this will happen to someone else. But for me, in my situation, those years were necessary to slow me down and show me, not in my time. Not on demand. Not now, but later- not as I thought it would be, but a whole different way.

So I do think God can and will heal people, I just don’t think it will happen on a schedule. In your first post you said you expected it to happen at a particular Mass. So that kind of threw me- that you may be expecting to walk out whole- which I think is unrealistic. I can more readily see that God would make it possible that treatments will work, that medications will help relieve your pain, that a good doctor will be put in your path. Not so much that poof at the 9:30 Mass your pain is gone.

I’m sorry I can’t be more helpful. But I don’t think anyone can give you the answer you are looking for. Prayers continue from me.