Finding a good Catholic spouse

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just curious…what about it that freaks you out?
simply because, if I cannot have children because I’m “too old,” and hypothetically, decide to adopt (assuming I’m married), I wouldn’t be able to do THAT either.
 
simply because, if I cannot have children because I’m “too old,” and hypothetically, decide to adopt (assuming I’m married), I wouldn’t be able to do THAT either.
I don’t get that way of thinking. An older couple can’t adopt, yet, it’s okay for a 50 or 60 year old man to father a child just because he can.
 
Dear misfitz -
Been there - done that. You keep trying. Only God knows what’s in store for you. I’m sure you know of Ave Maria Singles (I think it was headed or started by Fr. Groeschel). I didn’t know about that when I was looking…I’ve stopped.

Like anything in life, you have to shop, shop, shop. Don’t be disheartened - and good for New Orleans poster who jumped right in there ! God bless you in your search.
 
Dear misfitz -
I’m sure you know of Ave Maria Singles (I think it was headed or started by Fr. Groeschel). I didn’t know about that when I was looking…I’ve stopped.
Fr. Groeschel just endorses it. they are pretty solid in that they require you to be a solid Catholic in good standing to participate. next might be catholicmatch.com, then whatever secular ones like match.com or eharmony where anything goes…
 
Nobody has mentioned Ave Maria Singles yet? Google it. It is a Catholic dating website and there are quite a few sucess stories ( and members from CAF ) on there.
I already did, Sina.
Great minds - eh?
 
I’m not sure if this is the correct forum to post this in.

Can anyone offer any suggestions as to how to go about meeting single Catholic men? I’m 42 years old and I’ve never been married. I had stayed away from the dating scene for several years for several reasons.

As I decided to “come back”, I signed up on a Catholic singles site, but there are a very limited number of men in my area. LDR is not my thing. I attempted that already and I just don’t seem to have the strength for that. It also seems that many of the men I’ve encountered on that site are only players.

My church does not have any singles groups.

I’m at a loss. My mother seems to be of the belief that if it’s God’s will for me to marry one day, He will basically just throw someone out in front of me. :rolleyes:
I tell guys who are looking for a good Catholic wife to go to Jesus. He keeps the good ones in His Sacred Heart.

Perhaps Mary does the same for the men?

HTH.

Blessings,
Cloisters
 
I know a few youg catholic ladies (Well in their late 20’s) who are waiting for the “right” man. These ladies are complete knockouts. They have no problem attracting men, they just are waiting for the “right” man.

It reminds me of the man caught in a hurricane stuck up a tree. The man cries to the lord to save him. A boat full of people drifts by and tells him to jump in. He yells back that he will sink the boat as there will be too many men. An hour later as the storm picks up a helicopter flys by a lowers a ladder to the man, but the man must climb to the top of the tree which is swaying badly. The man is afraid and waves the chopper off. Finally as the wind is dying down, but the water is rising a large log slowly drifts by the tree. The man is afraid to get on the log, but he is now at the top of the tree.

Finally the water rises and the man drowns. When he gets to his judgment he asks the Lord why the Lord did not come for him. The Lord says “I sent you a boat a helicopter and a log. but you rejected all three.”

This young knockout I know is yearning for a “proper” cathcolic man. That man will NEVER come. We are all imprefect beings. We all have faults.

When I met my wife she was not practicing any religion. We had a good time together and enjoyed each others company. Over the years she attended church with me and learned about the Catholic faith. She converted before we were married.

She is one of the most insightful women I know. She can descren right from wrong and proper from improper much quicker than I can. Had I been waiting for the “right” woman I probably would not have been married to this excellent woman.

On a side note we were married in Rockford, IL at St. Mary’s in a traditional Tridentine Mass. We learned later that our marraige ceremony resulted in a new convert about six months later. A convert’s devotion lead to another convert.
 
Unfortunately, I have never found anyone to have a magical answer to your question. But I guess it helps to just get a bunch of suggestions.

Nevertheless, I would like to throw out an outside-the-box idea. Learn humility. If you have it, learn more. Read all you can about it. Do a Bible subject-search to learn more about it. Why? Humility begets God’s wisdom. Humility is attractive to God and to others. Humility also will help you as long as your prayers go unanswered (as you would like them answered)…it will help you cope with the suffering.

As well, don’t forget to offer your daily sufferings in union with Christ’s, for the sake of everyone and answers to your prayers.

God bless you. I am sorry for your struggle. 😦
 
Unfortunately, I have never found anyone to have a magical answer to your question. But I guess it helps to just get a bunch of suggestions.

Nevertheless, I would like to throw out an outside-the-box idea. Learn humility. If you have it, learn more. Read all you can about it. Do a Bible subject-search to learn more about it. Why? Humility begets God’s wisdom. Humility is attractive to God and to others. Humility also will help you as long as your prayers go unanswered (as you would like them answered)…it will help you cope with the suffering.

As well, don’t forget to offer your daily sufferings in union with Christ’s, for the sake of everyone and answers to your prayers.

God bless you. I am sorry for your struggle. 😦
And how does this help her find a spouse? She’s looking for a solution to her problems, not merely to “cope”. Please read James 2:15:
If a brother or sister has nothing to wear and no food for the day, and you say to them "Good-bye and good luck! Keep warm and well fed, but do not meet their bodily needs, what good is that?
I think the only thing you may have accomplished is making her feel guilty for wanting a good Catholic spouse.

Remember, per 1 Cor. 7 and 1 Timothy 5:11-14, if one cannot handle lifelong celibacy (and one is eligible for marriage, obviously), finding a spouse turns from being a mere DESIRE to become a spiritual DUTY.

And no one should EVER be faulted for trying to do their spiritual duty.
 
And how does this help her find a spouse? She’s looking for a solution to her problems, not merely to “cope”.
I offered her a solution to help her by practicing an attractive quality that will at the same time help cope in the meantime.
 
It’s not a knock on you. He is just stating, in albeit more harsh terms, what I observed in these women.

I find that many women who are “older” and have not married, but want to, fall into one of two categories:
  1. They are waiting for the “right” man. This man does not exist.
  2. They are career women who see marriage to a “man” as less important than their careers.
I am sure that I will get knocks for these views, but it is what I observe.

Look at Christ’s example. His apostles were tax collectors and others who society at the time perceived as pariahs. All of these men, save one, became good faithful men.
 
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