For the married, is it permissible to send intimate photos to your spouse?

[CatholicSooner]

Why would you try to arouse someone’s desire at a time they can’t be with you to satiate that desire?

I don’t do this but I imagine it’s a playful game that is used to build up arrousal for when the couple can perform marital relations.

 

[CatholicSooner]

TheLittleLady:

Aside from that, it can be a means of objectifying each other, slippery slope at the very least.

I think this is the key. It would be out of the bounds of marital chastity, because rather than loving a person, such photos reduce someone to an object.

-Fr ACEGC

I think that is going extremely overboard.

This statement assumes that you don’t love said person if you do this and that you are reducing them to an object.

 

[CatholicSooner]

Private moments ought to be private.

Anything transmitted over the internet can never be presumed private, and is potentially available to the whole world.

Yall are getting hung up on the electronic aspect and not really thinking about what was asked imo

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

Like when she’s upstairs and he’s downstairs? Or when he’s at work?

To elicit desire in another that cannot be fulfilled is not loving. And Father is correct. A picture of a woman designed to elicit sexual desire is not fostering a love of the wife, that is a desire to give to her, but of what he can get from her.

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

It wasn’t the intent of your question but it is pertinent.

 

[CatholicSooner]

Theresalux:

Is it ok to send intimate photos of yourself to your spouse? Is it within the realm of marital chastity to exchange such things? Or is it a sin against chastity? I’ve heard that it’s perfectly fine and others say naught. What do y’all think?

If you follow it logically though, you will realize that is no OK.

Reasons:

1. by sending the pictures, the spouse is objectifying him/herself
2. logically, the intimate photos can (and often do) lead to lustful thoughts (which are sinful) and can lead to the sin of masturbation.

Regardless of what people say, it is possible to objectify one’s spouse.

Let’s think of it this way: If your spouse was in jail, what would be accomplished by sending those pictures? You would simply be the featured model in your spouse’s porn.

These kinds of pictures are porn, plain and simple. Even within marriage. They serve one purpose and one purpose only… to “turn on the viewer.” Therefore, they are porn.

I hope this helps.

1. By this reasoning, anything a spouse does to attract her husband should be called objectifying. This is a false premise.
2. Just because something could lead to sin does not mean it is sinful itself.

 

[JimG]

Yall are getting hung up on the electronic aspect and not really thinking about what was asked imo

The question was this:

“Is it ok to send intimate photos of yourself to your spouse? Is it within the realm of marital chastity to exchange such things? Or is it a sin against chastity?”

To send intimate photos implies electronic transmission, which is risky and not OK, But even the existence of such photos, whether digital or not, objectifies a person and thus violates marital chastity.

 

[CatholicSooner]

Like when she’s upstairs and he’s downstairs? Or when he’s at work?

To elicit desire in another that cannot be fulfilled is not loving. And Father is correct. A picture of a woman designed to elicit sexual desire is not fostering a love of the wife, that is a desire to give to her, but of what he can get from her.

It will be fulfilled though.
What’s your appropriate timeframe of fulfillment?

You are making a lot of assumptions.

My wife and I practice NFP. We take it very seriously. She is pretty irregular. Part of the fun of it is showing affection to one another and knowing we can’t do anything about it. It teaches us to control our desires but also more importantly that loving one another is more than the marital embrace. It’s all a build up for when we can embrace one another again. It’s the exact opposite of objectifying each other.

Is it also sinful for my wife to kiss me goodbye and whisper about how she is excited for that night? Bc it creates anticipation and arrousal?

Y’all are coming off as holier than though

 

[CatholicSooner]

It wasn’t the intent of your question but it is pertinent.

Sure. But it wasn’t the intent

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

You know how forums work, right?

 

[CatholicSooner]

CatholicSooner:

Yall are getting hung up on the electronic aspect and not really thinking about what was asked imo

The question was this:

“Is it ok to send intimate photos of yourself to your spouse? Is it within the realm of marital chastity to exchange such things? Or is it a sin against chastity?”

To send intimate photos implies electronic transmission, which is risky and not OK, But even the existence of such photos, whether digital or not, objectifies a person and thus violates marital chastity.

Lol ok

There is nothing in church teaching that says this is wrong.

And assuming it is objectifying a spouse is incredibly insulting and assuming that you know about a persons relationship.

 

[CatholicSooner]

You know how forums work, right?

Yes I do. And I was pointing out that many of the answers were not addressing the question asked

 

[phil19034]

phil19034:

Theresalux:

Is it ok to send intimate photos of yourself to your spouse? Is it within the realm of marital chastity to exchange such things? Or is it a sin against chastity? I’ve heard that it’s perfectly fine and others say naught. What do y’all think?

If you follow it logically though, you will realize that is no OK.

Reasons:

1. by sending the pictures, the spouse is objectifying him/herself
2. logically, the intimate photos can (and often do) lead to lustful thoughts (which are sinful) and can lead to the sin of masturbation.

Regardless of what people say, it is possible to objectify one’s spouse.

Let’s think of it this way: If your spouse was in jail, what would be accomplished by sending those pictures? You would simply be the featured model in your spouse’s porn.

These kinds of pictures are porn, plain and simple. Even within marriage. They serve one purpose and one purpose only… to “turn on the viewer.” Therefore, they are porn.

I hope this helps.

1. By this reasoning, anything a spouse does to attract her husband should be called objectifying. This is a false premise.
2. Just because something could lead to sin does not mean it is sinful itself.

No. It’s not the same thing. If a wife is doing something in PERSON to attract her husband, it is a lot different.

While it’s still possible to objectify herself, it’s different when you can engage in the martial act right there and then.

When you send pictures, the husband is “imprinting” on the photo, not his wife. He cannot touch his wife, hug her, etc. When we orgasm, we need to cuddle in order to slowing come off from their hormonal high. Without cuddling, they crash. This has been scientifically proven by doctors.

Dr. Peter Kleponis has given a multiple of talks about porn addiction and what orgasm from pictures/video do to the brain vs. organisms with your spouse. He’s also discuss the science behind why we become “one flesh” in the marital embrace.

Dr. Kleponis once came to my parish to give us men a 1/2 day retreat and talk about all of this. It was very informative.

If you want your spouse to become a sex addict and potential adulterer, then send him/her pictures.

Peter C. Kleponis, Licensed Professional Counselor, King of Prussia, PA, 19406

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

It will be fulfilled though.

Perhaps sooner than you think.

What’s your appropriate timeframe of fulfillment?

You should be present with each other.

You are making a lot of assumptions.

Not really.

You seem awfully defensive though.

Part of the fun of it is showing affection to one another

Ambiguous statement is ambiguous

It’s all a build up for when we can embrace one another again. It’s the exact opposite of objectifying each other.

Since I don’t know what you’re talking about due to the previous ambiguity I can’t comment.

Is it also sinful for my wife to kiss me goodbye and whisper about how she is excited for that night?

As I said, you seem rather defensive.

Probably not. Unless she’s trying to arouse you in that moment rather than just fondly anticipate being together later.

Y’all are coming off as holier than though

You asked the question and then get upset with the answer. This sounds like a you problem. And if I am holier than you, what does that imply?

 

[MiserereMeiDei]

And I was pointing out that many of the answers were not addressing the question asked

That is how forums work. If you don’t want any tangential responses, try Quora.

 

[phil19034]

Is it also sinful for my wife to kiss me goodbye and whisper about how she is excited for that night? Bc it creates anticipation and arrousal?

Perhaps not because she’s giving you a kiss goodbye. You are able to embrace (even though not sexually)

But sending a picture to you while at work is really no different than having phone sex.

 

[TotusTuusForever]

What kind of pictures are you defining as intimate? Is the spouse clothed? Or are we talking about explicit images?

 

[CatholicSooner]

CatholicSooner:

phil19034:

Theresalux:

Is it ok to send intimate photos of yourself to your spouse? Is it within the realm of marital chastity to exchange such things? Or is it a sin against chastity? I’ve heard that it’s perfectly fine and others say naught. What do y’all think?

If you follow it logically though, you will realize that is no OK.

Reasons:

1. by sending the pictures, the spouse is objectifying him/herself
2. logically, the intimate photos can (and often do) lead to lustful thoughts (which are sinful) and can lead to the sin of masturbation.

Regardless of what people say, it is possible to objectify one’s spouse.

Let’s think of it this way: If your spouse was in jail, what would be accomplished by sending those pictures? You would simply be the featured model in your spouse’s porn.

These kinds of pictures are porn, plain and simple. Even within marriage. They serve one purpose and one purpose only… to “turn on the viewer.” Therefore, they are porn.

I hope this helps.

1. By this reasoning, anything a spouse does to attract her husband should be called objectifying. This is a false premise.
2. Just because something could lead to sin does not mean it is sinful itself.

No. It’s not the same thing. If a wife is doing something in PERSON to attract her husband, it is a lot different.

While it’s still possible to objectify herself, it’s different when you can engage in the martial act right there and then.

When you send pictures, the husband is “imprinting” on the photo, not his wife. He cannot touch his wife, hug her, etc. When we orgasm, they need to cuddle in order to slowing come off from their hormonal high. Without cuddling, they crash. This has been scientifically proven by doctors.

Dr. Peter Kleponis has given a multiple of talks about porn addiction and what orgasm from pictures/video do to the brain vs. organisms with your spouse. He’s also discuss the science behind why we become “one flesh” in the marital embrace.

Dr. Kleponis once came to my parish to give us men a 1/2 day retreat and talk about all of this. It was very informative.

If you want your spouse to become a sex addict and potential adulterer, then send him/her pictures.

https://www.peterkleponis.com/

Wow just wow

This is just ridiculous. For starters, we aren’t talking about orgasming to a picture Phil

 

[CatholicSooner]

CatholicSooner:

It will be fulfilled though.

Perhaps sooner than you think.

What’s your appropriate timeframe of fulfillment?

You should be present with each other.

You are making a lot of assumptions.

Not really.

You seem awfully defensive though.

Part of the fun of it is showing affection to one another

Ambiguous statement is ambiguous

It’s all a build up for when we can embrace one another again. It’s the exact opposite of objectifying each other.

Since I don’t know what you’re talking about due to the previous ambiguity I can’t comment.

Is it also sinful for my wife to kiss me goodbye and whisper about how she is excited for that night?

As I said, you seem rather defensive.

Probably not. Unless she’s trying to arouse you in that moment rather than just fondly anticipate being together later.

Y’all are coming off as holier than though

You asked the question and then get upset with the answer. This sounds like a you problem. And if I am holier than you, what does that imply?

I didn’t ask the question

I already said I wouldn’t send my wife pictures like this.

But people are going way overboard in the assumptions they are making. The logical fallacies in this thread are astounding.

 

[CatholicSooner]

CatholicSooner:

Is it also sinful for my wife to kiss me goodbye and whisper about how she is excited for that night? Bc it creates anticipation and arrousal?

Perhaps not because she’s giving you a kiss goodbye. You are able to embrace (even though not sexually)

But sending a picture to you while at work is really no different than having phone sex.

Wow dude. Just wow