Frustrated with talking during Mass

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I hear you. It’s ESPECIALLY aggravating when you had 4 hours of sleep because you get home from work at 6 in the morning and then sleep until 10 to get ready for 11:00 Mass.
 
Yes, it is hard. Have you talked to your parish Priest about this? I agree that it may be a growing challenge. Sometimes, a person can find a pew closer to the front, in the hopes that people would not talk so openly being so close to the altar. Just a thought there.

Of course, everyone should be reverent where-ever they are seated. Sometimes I feel empathy for those with young children, as they get such harsh looks! Certainly, though, it’s distracting when the parents keep up the talking. Also, I’ve noticed many parents sit towards the back, where they can exit quickly if the infants cry. If it’s the parent’s doing most of the “chatting,” perhaps the Priest could say something during the homily or later, when giving parish announcements. A note in the bulletin, a sign outside before entering the worship space might help too. During Lent, I see these signs often, but less so during “Ordinary” time.

Best wishes!:angel1:
 
I don’t think you are wrong nor do I think you are passing judgment, but I think frustration at the behavior of others, which you can’t control, is a sign of something.

Peace is a sign of the Holy Spirit. The spirit of aggrivation is never from God.

Pray for detachment, and then guns could be going off an you would still be at peace. Control what you can, pray for the rest and let it go into the hands of God. You will be at peace.

Sometimes we have to ask for the strength to do this. I used to think that serenity prayer was stupid, but it asks for the ablity to accept “hardships as a pathway to peace.”

-Tim-
I have identified why I get bothered by some of the garbage that takes place at so many Masses. Because it drives people away from the Mass and the Church and this might ultimately impact the probability of them spending eternity with God in heaven.

I’m not at all sure that Jesus wants us to be “at peace” when people treat parish churches, the Mass and the Blessed Sacrament with indifference at best and contempt at worst. I have met many, many people in my local community who finally stopped attending Mass because of the this indifference/contempt. For quite a number these were (and are) gut-wrenching, painful decisions.

I’ll say something else that the more pious-than-though crowd won’t like either. While I would certainly never suggest or condone the action, I believe God takes special pity on those who long endured great pain and simply couldn’t take it anymore and stopped attending Mass. The notion they are condemned to hell with certainty is absurd to me and I think it’s absurd to anyone that has endured long-term pain in the Church.
 
I know what you mean. The absolute best rememdy is to get there a little early and go all the way up front, in the first or second pew. You will not be bothered at all by anyone being irreverent or talking when the Mass is in progress. It really does work. Give it a try. 🙂
 
I know what you mean. The absolute best rememdy is to get there a little early and go all the way up front, in the first or second pew. You will not be bothered at all by anyone being irreverent or talking when the Mass is in progress. It really does work. Give it a try. 🙂
First, I do agree with you. We must do everything we can in our power to keep away from such people including sitting up front. A few Sundays ago I sat up front, the second row. One of the real loudmouths was a reader and sat directly in front of me. He had no one to talk to so he did a fair amount of mumbling to himself. That’s OK, very few could hear him.

It didn’t stop him from loudly spewing out his loud ejaculatory prayers throughout the Mass though. More than once the celebrant looked him with a “what?” expression on his face. You should have heard him add saints’ names to the EP. It’s all designed to bring attention to himself and it’s a huge turn off. That’s the sort of stuff (along with the pastor’s apathy) that ultimately drives people away. That’s the part that angers me.
 
The church where I attend Mass is not troubled by people talking during Mass .

But there is a lot of talking before and after . Quite a number of people arrive for Mass early , and it is clear that they have come for prayer before the most Blessed Sacrament . Sadly the silence which would be conducive to prayer is absent . The priest has mentioned the matter in the parish newsletter , but the talkers , and they can be loud talkers , continue to talk .
 
I’ll say something else that the more pious-than-though crowd won’t like either. While I would certainly never suggest or condone the action, I believe God takes special pity on those who long endured great pain and simply couldn’t take it anymore and stopped attending Mass. The notion they are condemned to hell with certainty is absurd to me and I think it’s absurd to anyone that has endured long-term pain in the Church.
Long term pain from someone talking. :ehh:

Maybe you should talk to some people that are in real long term pain. Maybe those that have devastating diseases or maybe those that have to walk miles simply to attend Mass, or those that have lost everything. They know about long term pain.

People that have to put up with other humans? No, that is not long term pain.
 
The one thing I’ve always thought interesting about the Catholic Church is the idea that children can’t be expected to sit quietly for an hour.

As a child I attended a pentecostal service twice every sunday. Both went for 3 - 4 hours, with the sermon alone usually lasted at least an hour. Whilst some parents bought toys most children were simply expected to sit/stand quietly. This was universal whether there were 100 people or 5000 people.

Yet Catholics bring all manner of toys/books/food etc in because 1 hr is just so hard.
 
Hi.

No. It’s not just you. I find it extremely discourteous to those of us who have come to Mass to pray and listen to the homily. I often turn and glance at people who are often talking at the top of their voices.

A couple of weeks ago I was at the vigil Mass and saw a young girl roller blading down the side aisle - while her mother sat there completely uncaring.

I agree that people like that may as well stay at home.

God bless,
Clare
 
Long term pain from someone talking. :ehh:

Maybe you should talk to some people that are in real long term pain. Maybe those that have devastating diseases or maybe those that have to walk miles simply to attend Mass, or those that have lost everything. They know about long term pain.

People that have to put up with other humans? No, that is not long term pain.
Hey, it could be for them. Everyone has different thresholds of pain, and for many people (like me), Mass is where they feel the most calm, collected and peaceful. It can be a sore trial for them if that peace, holiness and serenity, which they have a right to expect at a Mass, is destroyed by someone else, out of carelessness or otherwise. Judge not, and all that.

And, for that matter, do you think such people also don’t have horrible, tough trials in their lives? Why are you being so judgmental?
 
Hey, it could be for them. Everyone has different thresholds of pain, and for many people (like me), Mass is where they feel the most calm, collected and peaceful. It can be a sore trial for them if that peace, holiness and serenity, which they have a right to expect at a Mass, is destroyed by someone else, out of carelessness or otherwise. Judge not, and all that.

And, for that matter, do you think such people also don’t have horrible, tough trials in their lives? Why are you being so judgmental?
Because I’ve been there.

When you live in the horribleness of it all, you aren’t worried about people talking.
 
Because I’ve been there.

When you live in the horribleness of it all, you aren’t worried about people talking.
Well, God bless you and keep you. I’m sorry things are horrible for you. I will ask the Lord to take you further into His arms when I see Him at the tabernacle later today.

I would only gently point out, that, for many others who live in horrible situations, the disruption of the peace of the Mass can be a very real, very hard blow to them. You might keep them in your prayers too, if you are of a mind to do so.
 
Long term pain from someone talking.

Maybe you should talk to some people that are in real long term pain. Maybe those that have devastating diseases or maybe those that have to walk miles simply to attend Mass, or those that have lost everything. They know about long term pain.

People that have to put up with other humans? No, that is not long term pain.
Excuses. As expected.

Your crack “Long term pain from someone talking.” is insulting. At my parish, people treat the church building, the Mass and even the Blessed Sacrament with contempt. Talking loudly before, during and after Mass is only one of the problems.

As I said though, excuses such as the ones you brought to this discussion are quick to be mentioned if anyone seeks improvement.
 
Well, God bless you and keep you. I’m sorry things are horrible for you. I will ask the Lord to take you further into His arms when I see Him at the tabernacle later today.

I would only gently point out, that, for many others who live in horrible situations, the disruption of the peace of the Mass can be a very real, very hard blow to them. You might keep them in your prayers too, if you are of a mind to do so.
Very well said.
 
I have to admit at this stage in my life I really have few expectations of liturgical excellence at my home parish. I also don’t care for those ticky-tacky that like to scream about (usually imagined) “abuses” or those that bemoan the fact that their pastors do not follow their personal taste when it comes to a number of matters.

What does bother me is when the treatment of the church, the Mass and the Blessed sacrament gets so questionable (even to an outside visitor) that it turns people off and drives them away. That’s been happening for decades in my parish.

This collectively is probably the closest thing I have seen to real evil in my entire life.
 
The one thing I’ve always thought interesting about the Catholic Church is the idea that children can’t be expected to sit quietly for an hour.

As a child I attended a pentecostal service twice every sunday. Both went for 3 - 4 hours, with the sermon alone usually lasted at least an hour. Whilst some parents bought toys most children were simply expected to sit/stand quietly. This was universal whether there were 100 people or 5000 people.

Yet Catholics bring all manner of toys/books/food etc in because 1 hr is just so hard.
I think what age the child is has a huge bearing. 9 months? 15 months? 18 months? 2 years old? For many (not all) children of these ages, this would be unrealistic -developmentally they are just not there yet. Most those ages don’t even have the language skills to understand what is being asked of them. I have had children those ages who were quiet and shy in temperment, and COULD handle it, I have other children who just weren’t there developmentally yet. I could not imagine a child under 2 being expected to stand quietly for 3-4 hours in one spot.
 
Long term pain from someone talking. :ehh:

Maybe you should talk to some people that are in real long term pain. Maybe those that have devastating diseases or maybe those that have to walk miles simply to attend Mass, or those that have lost everything. They know about long term pain.

People that have to put up with other humans? No, that is not long term pain.
I think you brought up a valid and thoughtful point. I’m sorry you were treated rudely. And, I’m speaking as someone who is easily distracted and appreciates quiet during Mass. As one of the poster pointed out, I could easily sit up at the very front and that would (for me) eliminate visual distractions. I’m mainly glad that people are attending Mass.

A suggestion… this was the standard at the previous Church I attended… I assume it takes some coordination between parishioners and the Priest… The Rosary was always recited before Mass and, even if not everyone was participating, I never noticed any extraneous chatter before Mass began because it created the very prayerful atmosphere that people on this thread are hoping for. So, perhaps, they could do the same thing…?

And to all parents, please keep bringing your children to Mass! I am happy to put up with a little bit of distraction knowing that they are learning about God’s love for us.
 
I have identified why I get bothered by some of the garbage that takes place at so many Masses. Because it drives people away from the Mass and the Church and this might ultimately impact the probability of them spending eternity with God in heaven.

I’m not at all sure that Jesus wants us to be “at peace” when people treat parish churches, the Mass and the Blessed Sacrament with indifference at best and contempt at worst. I have met many, many people in my local community who finally stopped attending Mass because of the this indifference/contempt. For quite a number these were (and are) gut-wrenching, painful decisions.

I’ll say something else that the more pious-than-though crowd won’t like either. While I would certainly never suggest or condone the action, I believe God takes special pity on those who long endured great pain and simply couldn’t take it anymore and stopped attending Mass. The notion they are condemned to hell with certainty is absurd to me and I think it’s absurd to anyone that has endured long-term pain in the Church.
Christ taught us not to worry about things which we have no control over.

Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span? (Matthew 6:27)

Worry amd despair are lack of trust in God.

The Holy Spirit cannot work in an enviroment of strife and anger and worry. Jesus does want us to be at peace. Peace was the first thing Jesus gave his Church when he rose from the dead.

Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” (John 20:12)

They slit the throat of Bishop Luigi Padovese in 2010. They fed Christians to lions and threw them in cauldrons. They shot Blessed Pope John Paul II. They nailed our Lord to a tree. What makes you think that people are not going to talk in Church?

-Tim-
 
Christ taught us not to worry about things which we have no control over.

Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span? (Matthew 6:27)

Worry amd despair are lack of trust in God.

The Holy Spirit cannot work in an enviroment of strife and anger and worry. Jesus does want us to be at peace. Peace was the first thing Jesus gave his Church when he rose from the dead.

Jesus came and stood in their midst and said to them, “Peace be with you.” (John 20:12)

They slit the throat of Bishop Luigi Padovese in 2010. They fed Christians to lions and threw them in cauldrons. They shot Blessed Pope John Paul II. They nailed our Lord to a tree. What makes you think that people are not going to talk in Church?

-Tim-
Thank you for this perspective. I tend to agree with you.

I think that a lot of elderly people feel like they’re living on borrowed time, and they simply want to make sure that they say Hi and Bye to all their friends and acquaintances whenever they are able to get to Mass, just in case they don’t live until the next Mass.

A few weeks ago, two of the elderly gentlemen in our parish died within a few hours of each other. My husband and I have known them since we first started attending the Mass as Protestant seekers. They were lectors in the parish right up until the last weeks. These two gentlemen were among the first to reach out to us and say, “Hello, welcome! Are you new here?” I know that some Catholics feel uncomfortable with this kind of effusive greeting in the narthex, but to us, as evangelical Protestants, it felt good and comfortable and right.

And they continued to greet us each week and chat. Whenever I played piano, one of them would always tell me afterwards how much he enjoyed the music.

They were friendly with everyone, not just us, and alway had a greeting on their lips.

But now they’re gone, and I miss them.
 
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