T
TeachCatechism
Guest
Because in most states childless were ineligible. That is immoral.
- Status
T
TeachCatechism
Guest
I’m not opposed to welfare, I oppose those who use it instead of bettering themselves. The op’s daughter shouldn’t be having kids she and her husband can’t afford. They are intentionally bringing lives into the world they can’t afford.
A
Annie39
Guest
Uh, let me get this straight you are howling because your taxes are going to people who qualified because you attempted to mooch and were turned down? “Mooch” that’s your word, right? You could not be more insulting to the Ops daughter if you tried. Is it because you are jealous both of the fact that she has a loving husband and that she qualified for medical insurance? My gracious, I just wonder if the Lord has not sent the right man into your life because if you met him now you could ruin the relationship. Me thinks that it is possible that He would like for you to work on your ‘tude so as not to scare your future mate away. Also as the grandmother of a boy about to enter CCD I beg you to stop teaching our children pronto.
I have another question. Why would a woman in her early forties apply for medicaid?
Annie
PS
In a later post you wrote: “I’m not opposed to welfare, I oppose those who use it instead of bettering themselves. The op’s daughter shouldn’t be having kids she and her husband can’t afford. They are intentionally bringing lives into the world they can’t afford.”
How on earth can you say that you are opposed to welfare when you applied for it. It is about time that you MYOB.
M
Mandychu22
Guest
Were. Not are. And twisting a situation you find immoral into ‘just cause’ for thinking less of people who do qualify is certainly not fixing any immoralities that may exist (or have existed).
M
Mandychu22
Guest
Harsh, but likely accurate and in need of being said.
I don’t understand how anyone can complain that they didn’t qualify for a program, so anyone who uses that program is a drain because the system is obviously unfair. Especially since the system has changed since then, and corrected the ‘unfair’ policy!
… it’s the typical “If I can’t have it than no one can” attitude; a tantrum, nothing more.
T
TeachCatechism
Guest
Once again people are twisting my words. I never said I was opposed to helping, I stated this person is not bettering themselves. They are going to keep having babies they can’t afford. That is not fair to the taxpayers but also the other kids. There is no reason she couldn’t find at least a part time job to help once she has the baby, many women do it.
I’m going to ignore the digs about me because I refuse to resort to that level. You need to stop stalking me in all the threads and attacking me because it is wrong. Sorry, not jealous of a woman who makes babies she can’t afford and certainly not jealous of a woman with lots of kids.
I’m going to ignore the digs about me because I refuse to resort to that level. You need to stop stalking me in all the threads and attacking me because it is wrong. Sorry, not jealous of a woman who makes babies she can’t afford and certainly not jealous of a woman with lots of kids.
T
TeachCatechism
Guest
There is no reason to say I am jealous or to say you wouldn’t want me to teach your grandkid. That is evil and cruel. Yes I applied for Medicaid many years ago when I fell on hard times, so what? I didn’t have kids I couldn’t support.
A
Annie39
Guest
I wonder if the OP will report you for the attacks on his daughter. I’m not stalking you. this is a topic that I am passionate about.
T
TeachCatechism
Guest
Oh, nice trying to twist it and make it about me. Good be passionate but leave me alone and stop stalking me in every thread. He’s the one himself who stated his daughter was on medical, not me. Your comments to me stating I can’t find a man were very cruel and unnecessary. Not to mention your comments about teaching to your grandkids. They were just to be spiteful. So much for being a good Catholic, like you claimed I wasn’t. Guess what, I am passionate about keeping more of my money and donating it as I wish.
M
Mandychu22
Guest
The so what is related to the disdain you seem to be showing for the OP’s daughter for requiring the same assistance you applied for, the lack of compassion shown for her children and their needs, and your unwillingness to accept that the couple in question is doing anything but actively seeking pregnancy as often as possible. You assume that they are using the system in an abusive manner, and imply that their children are a crime against all other citizens who pay taxes. You repeatedly say that is ‘isn’t fair’ that they have access to this assistance because you didn’t qualify, even though your issues with the system have been corrected, and the couple in question live in a different state. THAT is the “So what?”.
I apologise if that wasn’t made clear earlier.
7
7armyrugrats
Guest
Yep. Life is not fair. Never has been, never will be. I repeat this constantly to my kids. Funny, they all seem to learn this lesson by age 10 because after that they no longer tell me, “But that’s not fair!” when things don’t go as they wanted and start saying, “Isn’t it great that brother got that award!” even when little brother beat older brother in whatever contest they were both in. By age 10 my kids start realizing they are not the center of the universe and that being happy for others makes them happy instead of disappointed all the time. Honestly it starts younger than that, but by 10 they seem to really get it.
I have noticed that people who grow up with upper middle class or extreme wealth seem to suffer from this attitude more often than the poor or the self made rich people. Maybe it is because the upper middle class are exposed to the wealth just enough to know they can’t afford all they want but friends can, and the extreme wealth never hears the word no. Poor people don’t have the resources to spoil their kids, and the self made rich knows the value of hard work so they instill that value in their kids. Of course there are exceptions, I’ve seen many exceptions to this myself.
No, life is not fair. But you know, God gives us what we need to better ourselves. What we decide to make of our circumstances is our own choice and it can either used to improve our souls or it can used it to kill them. The choice is ours to make.
I have noticed that people who grow up with upper middle class or extreme wealth seem to suffer from this attitude more often than the poor or the self made rich people. Maybe it is because the upper middle class are exposed to the wealth just enough to know they can’t afford all they want but friends can, and the extreme wealth never hears the word no. Poor people don’t have the resources to spoil their kids, and the self made rich knows the value of hard work so they instill that value in their kids. Of course there are exceptions, I’ve seen many exceptions to this myself.
No, life is not fair. But you know, God gives us what we need to better ourselves. What we decide to make of our circumstances is our own choice and it can either used to improve our souls or it can used it to kill them. The choice is ours to make.
M
Mandychu22
Guest
T
TeachCatechism
Guest
How would you know since you admitted you are in college? I stated that there is NFP and it has a high rate of success. I have no disdain for welfare, but yes for those who abuse it or don’t better themselves.
7
7armyrugrats
Guest
But not everyone has a high success rate with NFP. Babies are conceived everyday when parents were trying to avoid conception. What are they supposed to do if they get pregnant using NFP? For all any of us know, all four of their kids could have been conceived while trying to avoid. I know 6 of my kids were, and 7 of the 8 children I miscarried were. What do you suggest happen to the children? Other posters have asked this and you still have not answered.
And why should a college student know any less than you about this?
M
Mandychu22
Guest
Perhaps because I’m married and using NFP now for that very reason, and I know how irregular ovulation can be? Perhaps because I spent the last 2 weeks anxiously waiting for my period after I ovulated a week early, knowing that if I was pregnant I’d be giving birth during finals next year, dealing with judgement and disapproval?
Perhaps because I left the Church at 17 because I thought She was immoral, and spent from 19-present unlearning all the garbage and lies I was taught so that I could replace them with the truth? Perhaps because the only reason I returned to the Church was due to depression resulting from sexual assault, and I know that if I hadn’t been assaulted I would still be happily hating what I thought the Church was all about?
Perhaps because I’ve spent the last 3 years of my life in a position of authority, assisting others in learning about their faith through extensive questioning and research? Slowly learning that even minor facts I thought were truth due to false teaching are lies.
I know firsthand the harm false information, and truthful information conveyed inappropriately, can do to a young person’s faith. I suppose I’m in college though, so I can’t possibly have any knowledge about the world.
A
Annie39
Guest
M
Mandychu22
Guest
Thank you.
I think there are far too many people who don’t understand that birth control, including NFP, isn’t foolproof (go sex ed!
) Trying to avoid doesn’t mean children are impossible, and being open to life is a requirement of marriage, and all sexual acts within marriage. It doesn’t matter how poor, tired, sick, etc. you are.If NFP were 100%, it wouldn’t be open to life… I think.
M
Mandychu22
Guest
Yay! A friend!Your profile said that you haven’t made any friends yet. Oh yes you have.
Annie
C
CatholicRaven
Guest
Here’s something I’ve found that many men (and some women) don’t realize: whether a mom has one child or twenty, she generally gives everything she has.
When I had one child, I was exhausted. Now that I have six, with #7 on the way, I’m still exhausted–but no more so than before. And it’s worth it! So keep in mind that seeing your daughter “exhausted” does not necessarily indicate that she has too many kids or that she had them too close together or that she’s unfulfilled or overburdened. It could just be an indication that she’s giving herself completely to her family–and that’s a natural thing for a woman to do! That’s just how many of us are “wired.”
Of course, there is also the possibility that, when she’s around you, she intuitively feels your negativity and disapproval, and THAT saps her energy… even if it’s sub-conscious… I know that’s how I feel when I see certain relatives…
When I had one child, I was exhausted. Now that I have six, with #7 on the way, I’m still exhausted–but no more so than before. And it’s worth it! So keep in mind that seeing your daughter “exhausted” does not necessarily indicate that she has too many kids or that she had them too close together or that she’s unfulfilled or overburdened. It could just be an indication that she’s giving herself completely to her family–and that’s a natural thing for a woman to do! That’s just how many of us are “wired.”
Of course, there is also the possibility that, when she’s around you, she intuitively feels your negativity and disapproval, and THAT saps her energy… even if it’s sub-conscious… I know that’s how I feel when I see certain relatives…
H
holyrood
Guest
Intentionally??? You do not know that.
It has been said repeatedly and you have not addressed:
I’ll say it again: I know people who have become pregnant three or four times on artificial birth control and NFP both. I have become pregnant using NFP when it should have been physically impossible. Twins, no less.
Please tell us your suggestion. *Maybe *this woman *is *already using NFP and cutting it down to relations once per month in what should have been the impossible time to get pregnant, and has anyway.
Do you want her to:
A. Abort.
B. Stop having any sex at all with her husband.
I’m sorry, I don’t think it’s immoral at all. A childless person has much more time and ability to go to school and get a job, or improve their job condition.
As Catholic Raven wisely pointed out, whether a woman has one child or four, being a mother takes a great deal of time and energy. Doing a good job raising a healthy and moral next generation IS a job. It should be the most important job there is.
And once again: I think this couple would have had financial problems with zero children.
Funny story–My (now ex) husband and I were raising 9 children on 1-1/2 incomes. My sister and her husband had two full time incomes (hers quite good, as she was in a profession) plus his income from a side job. They had one baby on the way. ONE. Not even there yet. My mother was forever sighing about how hard life is for young couples, and how financially difficult it was for them. How she had to give free day care when the baby came because they just ‘couldn’t afford it.’
Just making the point, financial problems and other people’s perceptions of financial problems are very often not based on number of children at all, even though that’s often blamed.
- Status