Hey guys can a girl be too active for you?

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Sierrah

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One problem out there seems to be finding a guy that can keep up. If she likes to hike, bike and do a lot a physical sports related activities would this turn you off from pursuing a girl. I’m not talking about doing a triatholon or anything of that sort but just being active like camping, volunteering, dancing what have you. Or do guys really prefer a girl to just stay at home or keep things more low key. What’s the verdict? I’m not planning or making any changes to what I do I’m just curious. 👍
 
The simple answer is that this would depend on the guy.

A less active guy would prefer a less active girl.

An active guy would prefer an active girl.

I think it’s perfectly reasonable for guys and girls to seek out people with similar activity levels.
 
For example all the good Catholic guys I know are couch potato’s. Sad to say but true. Can’t find any active ones anywhere. 😦
 
Sierrah said:
For example all the good Catholic guys I know are couch potato’s. Sad to say but true. Can’t find any active ones anywhere. 😦
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Where have you looked?

Do you belong to any clubs/groups that are specific to your interests? What about organizing something through your diocese? Like a bike ride for charity or something? Try to merge the active with the faithful… **
 
I’m a member of several groups including catholic groups, biking/hiking groups, dancing groups. It’s not that I don’t get out there or that I not involved with Catholic groups. All the active people I know seem to be secular at the least. All the catholic people I know tend to be non active. I don’t know 1 catholic besides me who is active at all. In fact they seem to look at me with amazement when I tell them all the active stuff I do like they can’t relate at all. It seems to be a trend among catholics of my age I guess not to be involved in much. I hate to generalize but that’s been my experience. I’d love to meet other catholics who are active either male for female. Anyway the active part seems to turn guys off. :rolleyes: 🤷
 
Sierrah said:
I’m a member of several groups including catholic groups, biking/hiking groups, dancing groups. It’s not that I don’t get out there or that I not involved with Catholic groups. All the active people I know seem to be secular at the least. All the catholic people I know tend to be non active. I don’t know 1 catholic besides me who is active at all. In fact they seem to look at me with amazement when I tell them all the active stuff I do like they can’t relate at all. It seems to be a trend among catholics of my age I guess not to be involved in much. I hate to generalize but that’s been my experience. I’d love to meet other catholics who are active either male for female. Anyway the active part seems to turn guys off. :rolleyes: 🤷
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Can ‘she’ be too active? Yes, of course.

But, biking, hiking, dancing doesn’t sound like being too active.

OTOH, if it is indicative of a strong-willed, fiery character - then maybe that is what some guys are afraid of?
 
Magicsilence said:
Can ‘she’ be too active? Yes, of course.

But, biking, hiking, dancing doesn’t sound like being too active.

OTOH, if it is indicative of a strong-willed, fiery character - then maybe that is what some guys are afraid of?
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Hum good point. Though I don’t think that much of a problem in my case. I tend to just go with the flow. I could see someone being active as coming off that way though. 🤷
 
And honestly, if guys are scared of a strong character… RUN. You don’t want that guy.
 
maybe secular guys have more time to hike on the weekends cos they don’t go to church?

I agree too active would depend on the guy.
 
What about starting an online group for active Catholics? At least you could meet like minded people and know you’re not the ONLY one…and if Mr.Right is out there then let’s hope he has the internet:D
 
Sierrah said:
I’m a member of several groups including catholic groups, biking/hiking groups, dancing groups. It’s not that I don’t get out there or that I not involved with Catholic groups. All the active people I know seem to be secular at the least. All the catholic people I know tend to be non active. I don’t know 1 catholic besides me who is active at all. In fact they seem to look at me with amazement when I tell them all the active stuff I do like they can’t relate at all. It seems to be a trend among catholics of my age I guess not to be involved in much. I hate to generalize but that’s been my experience. I’d love to meet other catholics who are active either male for female. Anyway the active part seems to turn guys off. :rolleyes: 🤷
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I’m a “young adult”, according to the US bishops (ages 18-36), and there are young adult groups at my parish and at several of the nearby parishes (and, actually, all throughout our archdiocese). We play soccer every Monday, and the other group goes camping, rock climbing, etc. I’d say that we’re pretty active.

So maybe it just depends on where you are. Am I correct in assuming you’re a “young adult,” too? If you don’t have such a group, then you could start one–then invite people in the group to do some of the things that you like.

Anyway, I can’t imagine why a girl being active would turn a guy off. But then again, maybe that’s because I’m active myself? I think it’s just a matter of personality. I would think, though, that **some **kind of activity would be encouraged among orthodox Catholics, if for the simple reason that we have a moral obligation (rooted in natural law, in the 5th commandment, and in the commandment to love our neighbor as ourselves) to take care of our bodies. It is a part of being a good steward of the “talents” that God has given us, understood, of course, in the hierarchy of values–that the soul is more important than the body.

I don’t know if this helps. Ask the Blessed Virgin Mary to send you the guy for you, and she will do it (assuming God is calling you to marriage)! Don’t stop praying for this until you’re married!
 
Sierrah said:
For example all the good Catholic guys I know are couch potato’s. Sad to say but true. Can’t find any active ones anywhere. 😦
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There are lots of active good Catholic guys and girls. God just keeps them apart until He sees fit. 😊
 
jwkovacs said:
I’m a “young adult”, according to the US bishops (ages 18-36), and there are young adult groups at my parish and at several of the nearby parishes (and, actually, all throughout our archdiocese). We play soccer every Monday, and the other group goes camping, rock climbing, etc. I’d say that we’re pretty active.

So maybe it just depends on where you are. Am I correct in assuming you’re a “young adult,” too? If you don’t have such a group, then you could start one–then invite people in the group to do some of the things that you like.

Anyway, I can’t imagine why a girl being active would turn a guy off. But then again, maybe that’s because I’m active myself? I think it’s just a matter of personality. I would think, though, that **some **kind of activity would be encouraged among orthodox Catholics, if for the simple reason that we have a moral obligation (rooted in natural law, in the 5th commandment, and in the commandment to love our neighbor as ourselves) to take care of our bodies. It is a part of being a good steward of the “talents” that God has given us, understood, of course, in the hierarchy of values–that the soul is more important than the body.

I don’t know if this helps. Ask the Blessed Virgin Mary to send you the guy for you, and she will do it (assuming God is calling you to marriage)! Don’t stop praying for this until you’re married!
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While I’m not a young adult except in my own mind…who want to be middle aged…lol. I think my age range has a lot to do with it. I’m more in the 35-44 age group but I do agree with you about a responsibility to take care of ourselves with seems to be sadly lacking in the the church these days.
 
Sierrah said:
One problem out there seems to be finding a guy that can keep up. If she likes to hike, bike and do a lot a physical sports related activities would this turn you off from pursuing a girl. I’m not talking about doing a triatholon or anything of that sort but just being active like camping, volunteering, dancing what have you. Or do guys really prefer a girl to just stay at home or keep things more low key. What’s the verdict? I’m not planning or making any changes to what I do I’m just curious. 👍
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Depends. I remember meeting a sports school girl at the seaside when I was 20. I nearly coughed my lungs out and swallowed my own blood as I was keeping up with her running tempo (up a dune) and trying to exceed it by just the obligatory little, and doing all I could to keep my voice from betraying me by panting. This is asthma for you. But the answer is that it would be hard.

When I’m trying to think about something, I can only come up with the idea that well, if she spent much of the time doing things I couldn’t do with her, say more than I could spend on my own hobbies without missing her company too much, then I would be sad because of it, but it would be a matter of time, not the activity of active-ness. 😉 All in all, I’m rather attracted to sporty people as people and sporty women as women. 😉 Sport builds up the spirit and shapes the character giving it some traits I find the most valuable. In life, other than sport, I appreciate the people who can and do the job, who try hard and get things done, who put up with a lot and who can take a long strain. People who will keep going without much food or water or sleep. People who will not stop not just because they are really tired and need to stop but rather because they cannot stand a second of feeling tired. I cannot run that long, but I run until I can taste my blood and even more, basically until I drop, if need be. And I do things that I know will cost me lots of pain in several coming hours or days. I do not expect the same from other people, especially not from women, but I certainly can appreciate this thing in people.

So, give me a girl who will keep up with my long walks, who will dance the night away with me, who will not give up on a mountain ahead, who will not be put out of action by sub-tropical sun. Then the adventure can start. 😉
 
I have no problem with a feiry woman. In fact, that was part of my criteria for a wife!!

But some girls are just too busy…Always doing something…They never stand still or slow down. I really like a young woman who DOES do quite a lot…but she can sit still and talk. She isn’t distracted by the stuff she does. We can sit or stand together, and share a moment of silence.

Balance is good and attractive.
 
There have been some good answers here.

I’ll just add one “old-fashioned” thing. I think, even in our modern days of equality, that a lot of guys want to be stronger than the girls they date. I know they like to be asked for physical help. Perhaps it’s your strength that scares them off, especially if the Catholic men you know are more sedentary than you.

Just a thought. I’m not making a moral judgment! In fact, I wish I was as active as you. :(😃

God bless you,

Ruthie
 
Ruthie said:
There have been some good answers here.

I’ll just add one “old-fashioned” thing. I think, even in our modern days of equality, that a lot of guys want to be stronger than the girls they date. I know they like to be asked for physical help. Perhaps it’s your strength that scares them off, especially if the Catholic men you know are more sedentary than you.

Just a thought. I’m not making a moral judgment! In fact, I wish I was as active as you. :(😃

God bless you,

Ruthie
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True I think guys do like to be the stronger one. I don’t see a problem with that but honestly I would rather voyage on alone then give up some of the activities I enjoy though I would be willing to scale down a bit. I don’t think guys ever consider that. Should I sit at home and wait for some guy to notice me…never worked before. It would be nice for once though to meet other active Catholics. 🤷
 
whatevergirl said:
I was gonna say…there is nothing wrong with a fiery, strong willed woman. 👍
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Just like any character that is God-given, it can work providing the husband knows how to deal with that character and work with it.

However, I think many women see ‘fiery and strong-willed’ as an indication that because of that character trait, ‘rebellion’😛 against the husbands wishes is ok, and that a woman should be free to ‘live her own life’, even within the marriage.

From that point of view, you may be able to see why women who are a little more ‘masculine’ than others, in terms of frequent exercise, being strong-willed, and being highly active would be a little more risky in terms of looking towards having a happy, lasting, marriage 👍

Maybe being highly active is also associated with radical feminism too?
 
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