Because I write a lot about sexuality and because I’m fairly liberal, it is invariably assumed that lust is among (perhaps foremost among) the sins that have led me down the garden path to hell. This is the intended “gotcha” moment where the priest accurately scries the secrets of your soul and uncovers the real ulterior motive behind your supposedly intellectual reservations.
The thing is, it’s a Barnum statement. The way that Catholic sexual morality is constructed, there is almost nobody who is able to practice it. Catholics are trained to feel deeply ashamed of this, so when they are accused of their “secret sin” it starts up a cycle of self-doubt that makes them more susceptible to authoritarian claims. I mean, what if it really does just come down to lust? What if I’m not thinking or acting in good faith, but rather trying to justify this shameful addiction to sex?
Nevermind that the “addiction” in this case is actually a natural drive which most humans have as a means of perpetuating the species. Telling someone that their natural drives are shameful and sinful is a great way to destablize their self-concept and to make them vulnerable to manipulation and abuse.
In my personal case, though, it backfires every single time. Why? Because while my orientation is primarily same-sex, I’m also borderline asexual. Going without sex doesn’t bother me particularly. I’ve studied human sexuality enough to know that if my intellectual integrity is being eroded by lust, then intellectual integrity is something that only a very small number of humans could ever hope to attain to.
