How do catholic women or men justify their consciences with using contraception?

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jmcrae said:
I think the idea is more, “God isn’t paying any attention to me, so I can hide in the corner and do whatever I want, because He’s too busy elsewhere.”

A lot of people imagine that God is a being like ourselves, whose attention can be diverted, and who only has a certain amount of time to give to each task.
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Wrong, that was not my thought at all. Again I prayed about it, knowing the church considered it wrong, and I hardly think God misses anything. Really?
 
Frank_Drebin said:
Most people couldn’t care less about God and sin, though. Looking at it through a prism of a person who posts on Catholic Answers is not the norm.

For most people, it is all about “me, me, me.” They are unwilling to sacrifice for their children , for the spouse, and thus, there is no way they’ll sacrifice for God.
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I sacrifice for my children to go to Catholic school. To pay for them to go to Catholic high school together will cost me $51, 000 dollars a year, A Year. This is something greatly encouraged at baptism to help their growth of Catholic faith.

I buy ALL my clothes at the Goodwill, I have not eaten out in a restaurant or fast for for over a year, I never go tot he movies or have HBO or pay preview. I take any extra jobs I can. We only buy very used cars when one of our two completely dies. In fact, I had our last one toed away fro $200 dollars from a scape place, and was very grateful for that $200 hundred dollars. I cut my own hair. I do not grow my own food yet, but I am working on that. This is all while living in a very materialistic, big city. My kids have been on one family vacation that we were able to go on a plane and not stay in a tent. I am grateful for every bit of what I have, but could not feed more children and if I could I would adopt a child rather than have another of my own.

What if a couple used the pill after having 2 children of their own and then adopted children in need? Would you judge them as much?
 
shelby_sun said:
I sacrifice for my children to go to Catholic school. To pay for them to go to Catholic high school together will cost me $51, 000 dollars a year, A Year. This is something greatly encouraged at baptism to help their growth of Catholic faith.

I buy ALL my clothes at the Goodwill, I have not eaten out in a restaurant or fast for for over a year, I never go tot he movies or have HBO or pay preview. I take any extra jobs I can. We only buy very used cars when one of our two completely dies. In fact, I had our last one toed away fro $200 dollars from a scape place, and was very grateful for that $200 hundred dollars. I cut my own hair. I do not grow my own food yet, but I am working on that. This is all while living in a very materialistic, big city. My kids have been on one family vacation that we were able to go on a plane and not stay in a tent. I am grateful for every bit of what I have, but could not feed more children and if I could I would adopt a child rather than have another of my own.

What if a couple used the pill after having 2 children of their own and then adopted children in need? Would you judge them as much?
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Catholic school is encouraged, for sure. And when we can, we should have our kids attend. But not at the expense of our eternal souls! What good is a Catholic education if Mom and Dad are not providing a good Catholic example in the home? Honestly, in your situation you have every right to utilize public education, or to homeschool if it is feasible. No need to drop $51,000 a year when it means you have to live so very austerely.
 
shelby_sun said:
So those who cannot feed their children enough to be health is because they do the right they with all that God gave them? Seriously? Those born on the streets, all those children dying in Africa? Those who sending their children into sweat shop to have enough money to buy minimal amount of food? God is giving them what they need?:eek:
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In the developing world the people don’t use birth control because for them a pregnancy is a victory - it means that there will be a next generation to continue the fight that must be fought. It’s not because they are illiterate, or because the women are stupid, or because there is something wrong with the men - it’s because they want to increase their population and conquer their enemies. Yes, the children will struggle and suffer, but they in turn will also have children, and continue the fight, and eventually, there will be victory, peace, and a good life. That’s what they hope for when they get pregnant. They aren’t saying “Oops, my birth control didn’t work.” They are saying, “YAAAY, a son or daughter to carry our message and our culture and our fight into the future.”
 
jmcrae said:
In the developing world the people don’t use birth control because for them a pregnancy is a victory - it means that there will be a next generation to continue the fight that must be fought. It’s not because they are illiterate, or because the women are stupid, or because there is something wrong with the men - it’s because they want to increase their population and conquer their enemies. Yes, the children will struggle and suffer, but they in turn will also have children, and continue the fight, and eventually, there will be victory, peace, and a good life. That’s what they hope for when they get pregnant. They aren’t saying “Oops, my birth control didn’t work.” They are saying, “YAAAY, a son or daughter to carry our message and our culture and our fight into the future.”
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OK, thank you; what about the one who are int he US?
 
shelby_sun said:
Wrong, that was not my thought at all. Again I prayed about it, knowing the church considered it wrong, and I hardly think God misses anything. Really?
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God and the Church are one and the same thing; the Church is God’s self-expression in the world. So, if the Church thinks something is bad, that means that God thinks it’s bad.
 
JackieMom said:
Catholic school is encouraged, for sure. And when we can, we should have our kids attend. But not at the expense of our eternal souls! What good is a Catholic education if Mom and Dad are not providing a good Catholic example in the home? Honestly, in your situation you have every right to utilize public education, or to homeschool if it is feasible. No need to drop $51,000 a year when it means you have to live so very austerely.
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OK wait just a minute. I should send my kids to public school, ours has it is own little police station on campus or home school my kids, even though my degrees are not in higher education, over catholic school because I have to live the way I do and I can;t go out to eat or to the movies like everyone else, something I am glad to do to have them in Catholic school, even if it is so austerely compared to others. Isn’t being able to live like everyone else and not have to sacrifice so much one of the excuses people have used for using BC, not NFP. Sounds very familiar.:eek:

I don’t tell my children I use BC, nor do a recommend it to them, so don’t be so presumpltuous to assume I am a poor example, very uncharitable.🤷
 
jmcrae said:
God and the Church are one and the same thing; the Church is God’s self-expression in the world. So, if the Church thinks something is bad, that means that God thinks it’s bad.
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That thought is fine, but you said people out their like me just don’t think God is watch us which is absurd.
 
shelby_sun said:
That thought is fine, but you said people out their like me just don’t think God is watch us which is absurd.
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If you know that God sees you, and you are well aware that using birth control is a mortal sin, then are you simply resigning yourself to go to Hell? Or how do you think you are going to escape from the flames of Hell?
 
shelby_sun said:
That thought is fine, but you said people out their like me just don’t think God is watch us which is absurd.
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If I were you, I’d be reforming my behaviour, if I knew I was committing a mortal sin, and that God is watching me do it. I remember as a kid, realizing that my mother was watching me do something she had told me not to do. I felt like flushing myself down the toilet, I was so upset with myself.

Who are you more afraid of than God, that God can sit there and watch you commit a mortal sin, and you don’t want to stop committing it?
 
jmcrae said:
If I were you, I’d be reforming my behaviour, if I knew I was committing a mortal sin, and that God is watching me do it. I remember as a kid, realizing that my mother was watching me do something she had told me not to do. I felt like flushing myself down the toilet, I was so upset with myself.

Who are you more afraid of than God, that God can sit there and watch you commit a mortal sin, and you don’t want to stop committing it?
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I am sorry but I didn’t ask what you would do if you were me, as I am sure you don’t care what I think you should do.

I do not think I am committing a sin, but I know the church does. I think God is a lot less happy with those that use NFP to have only one child, yet don’t send there children to catholic school, spend money on "living like everyone one else, not adopting children in need, drinking, partying, going out a lot traveling a lot, buying clothes to look like everyone else. By sending my kids to Catholic school they will graduate from high school with hundreds of hours of community service helping others. I have me problem with God watching how I have lived my life.
 
shelby_sun said:
I am sorry but I didn’t ask what you would do if you were me, as I am sure you don’t care what I think you should do.

I do not think I am committing a sin, but I know the church does. I think God is a lot less happy with those that use NFP to have only one child, yet don’t send there children to catholic school, spend money on "living like everyone one else, not adopting children in need, drinking, partying, going out a lot traveling a lot, buying clothes to look like everyone else. By sending my kids to Catholic school they will graduate from high school with hundreds of hours of community service helping others. I have me problem with God watching how I have lived my life.
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So, God set up the Church for - what, then?

Just to confuse us? 🤷

God can’t disagree with the Church; the Church is God’s conscious mind. “What you (Peter/ the Catholic Church) bind on earth I (God) bind in Heaven. What you (Peter / the Catholic Church) set free on earth, I (God) set free in Heaven.” Matthew 16:19.
 
shelby_sun said:
OK wait just a minute. I should send my kids to public school, ours has it is own little police station on campus or home school my kids, even though my degrees are not in higher education, over catholic school because I have to live the way I do and I can;t go out to eat or to the movies like everyone else, something I am glad to do to have them in Catholic school, even if it is so austerely compared to others. Isn’t being able to live like everyone else and not have to sacrifice so much one of the excuses people have used for using BC, not NFP. Sounds very familiar.:eek:

I don’t tell my children I use BC, nor do a recommend it to them, so don’t be so presumpltuous to assume I am a poor example, very uncharitable.🤷
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No. What I meant was - If feeling obligated to pay for Catholic school for all your kids is a reason you use contraception, then you should absolutely pull them out and remove that stumbling block from your path.

And it is a poor example, even if you hide it from the kids. Not only are you lying, but you’re asking your children to grow up and do aomething you’re not willing to do yourself. Your attitude of “I can do X, even if God/The Church says not to” is not something you can hide. I mean, that’s like saying I go to work at a Planned Parenthood every day and have no guilt about it, but I preach pro-life to my kids and don’t tell them where I work, so it’s not harming them.
 
jmcrae said:
So, God set up the Church for - what, then?

Just to confuse us? 🤷

God can’t disagree with the Church; the Church is God’s conscious mind. “What you (Peter/ the Catholic Church) bind on earth I (God) bind in Heaven. What you (Peter / the Catholic Church) set free on earth, I (God) set free in Heaven.” Matthew 16:19.
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There are many here to claim they know what God wants , exactly. Let me ask, fasting used to mean just that in the church, now it means one regular meal, and two much smaller meals. How could the church be right in both cases and why did it change?
 
shelby_sun said:
Your point?
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Shelby, what is your point? I’m so confused. You ask people their point but haven’t said yours. Then you write, “I am sorry but I didn’t ask what you would do if you were me, as I am sure you don’t care what I think you should do.”

Then you go on to post, “I do not think I am committing a sin, but I know the church does . . .”

From what I can see, you are announcing to CAF that you are choosing to live in obstinate sin - in defiance of Church teaching. On the other hand,it seems that you’re hoping dropping cash on Catholic schools will help your children learn how to live the Catholic life? Is that it?

It seems to me that many people on here - myself included - do care about you as a sister in Christ. We’ve filled our obligation in letting you know that your choice is sinful and not in line with Church teachings. This was not to judge you, but to save you from God’s judgment. You posted, “I think God is a lot less happy with those that use NFP to have only one child . . .” I’m not sure it works that way. When we die, we stand before God alone. We cannot compare our self to another or blame another. We are held accountable for our own actions. Acknowledging you KNOW what you are doing is sinful is what displeases God. This may sounds corny, but it makes me feel sad. No one on here is going to convince you with an argument so all I can do is offer you both my prayers and a listening ear if you’d like to message me. God’s peace on you and your family.
 
shelby_sun said:
There are many here to claim they know what God wants , exactly. Let me ask, fasting used to mean just that in the church, now it means one regular meal, and two much smaller meals. How could the church be right in both cases and why did it change?
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1 regular meal and two smaller ones are the MAXIMUM a person should eat on a day of fast. Some of us still follow the “black fast” - only a cup or coffee or tea - plain.

We come to know God and what God wants by full immersion in our practice of the Faith - not just picking and choosing bits to follow and parts to disregard. God constantly reveals Himself to us in His Holy Word, thru Sacred Tradition and in the teaching authority of the Magisterium. I think it’s the coolest part about being Catholic - we don’t have to “wing it” or make stuff up like other Christian traditions do. We’ve got it all. The choice is to accept the cross and follow Him or not . . . . .
 
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