When we were growing up (I’m a similar vintage) it was probably assumed that men were married (until proved otherwise) and couples were married (also until proved otherwise.)
Well, infertile couples are automatically assumed by most to be contracepting. Is that also scandal, or should we let those who assume the worst be responsible for their own sins?
Exactly.
DH had told me his ring size but we lived in separate provinces and so wasn’t with me when I ordered our rings. When he got home a few days before the wedding we found that his ring didn’t fit but it was too late to have it sized. I put vaseline inside it for the wedding but then when Fr. picked it up he put his finger in it and removed most of the vaseline – I couldn’t put it on DH’s finger and so whispered (or so I thought) “Put it on yourself.” Guess it was a stage whisper for they heard it 10 rows down.
But THAT’S what I wanted. I’d always envied the guys in school who had rings made from drilled out nuts (of the nuts and bolts variety). This was my chance to have something industrial looking. In every chain jewellery store I went to I heard the same story “No, sorry, there’s no such thing. All our bands are rounded or engraved.” Finally I went to this out-of-the-way private jeweller and said “Look, I’m looking for a plain white gold band. What you’d end up with if you just cut off a piece of steel pipe.” Showing me his hand he said, “You mean like this?” There was my ring, on his finger. “No problem, I’ll get those for you.”
). I wear my wedding and engagement rings most of the time when I am out of the house, but normally take them off when I am at home. My husband was very concerned that I would be offended when he told me he didn’t want to wear a ring, but it never bothered me as I knew he hated jewelry.
) until he gets home.
I take mine off at home typically too…I was never one to wear mine to bed, do the dishes wearing them, etc…I lost the first ring, don’t want to lose this one!Neither my husband or I care much for jewelry. He never wears his wedding ring (although he has said he will wear it for special occasions if I would like him to
They are concidered marriage sacramentals, reminders of the Sacrament.
I get that, but what I sometimes wonder is, why are they usually so expensive? From my experience, most people want real diamonds, and an expensive metal like gold or platinum. Why wouldn’t a sterling silver ring with a CZ or another less expensive stone–ruby, sapphire, etc.–be just as much of a sacramental? I mean, it would, but most people think that is being too “cheap”. I think a lot of that is marketing. I really do. I don’t think it is always wrong to own something more expensive, but I think we need to ask “why”?
Many. many years ago, when my sister was pregnant with her first child, now 22, she could not wear her rings. Her hands were swollen.Then one time I went out to eat w/ DH. It was to a fancy restaurant to celebrate our first date. I was clearly about to explode. He was wearing his ring. I handed the waiter DH’s credit card. And the waiter came back and said, “Miss X, I need your driver’s license to verify this credit card. It’s a man’s name.” I gave it to him. Then he said, “You are using your husband’s card to pay for this meal?” With a dark look and everything! You know, b/c 30 week pregnant, married women like to cheat with married men! And use their hubby’s card! OMGsh!!
/rant
I can appreciate what you are saying, but we don’t have our wedding bands anymore. Mine barely fit on my finger on our warm wedding day; my dh could not get it on my finger, I had to struggle to do that. We had bought them on a very cold day, and no one mentioned to me about hands expanding/contracting with the temperature. It never occurred to me, as I wasn’t a ring wearer. We went back to the jeweler on the Monday after our wedding, but he told us the ring could not be resized because of the design/engraving all the way around it. He would not take them back (they matched) or exchange them. It was very maddening and seemed he only wanted to make a sale.
I got pregnant three months later and NO WAY would it even fit on me then…certainly not now…and we got rid of them after only a few months. I wasn’t even thinking of them being sacramentals.
Wow, that’s a strong statement, that not wearing a wedding ring could cause you to be an “occasion of sin” to someone else. How would that be exactly? If you are dressing or acting immodestly, then yes, but not by not wearing a wedding ring…I don’t get the connection.
So far that’s not been necessary.
I stand by the statement.Wow, that’s a strong statement, that not wearing a wedding ring could cause you to be an “occasion of sin” to someone else. How would that be exactly? If you are dressing or acting immodestly, then yes, but not by not wearing a wedding ring…I don’t get the connection.
I’m a SAHM; maybe it’d be different if I worked in a place where I came in contact with many different people. When I go out socially, most of the time I’m with my husband and obviously not available. When I go somewhere alone, to the grocery store or Home Depot or wherever, I honestly do not think men are checking my left hand. I’ve never, ever been “hit on”, in almost 26 years of marriage, but some guy mistakenly thinking I was single. I was hit on by a guy who KNEW I was married, but that was his problem. He hit on other married women, too. Ugh.
I suppose if it ever became a problem, I could wear a ring, or a sign on my forehead or something.
I certainly don’t hide the fact that I’m married. I often have one or more kids with me, and in the grocery store I’m always buying a huge cartload of food so I’m obviously either the mom of a big family or I’m throwing one heckuva huge party.