How should I tell them

[edcaro]

Out of curiosity, why Lutheran? Why do you think their beliefs are true? What appeals to you about their beliefs?

I’m a little bit like you, I used to be a strong Catholic but I lost faith. But I haven’t made the move to another branch of Christianity because they seem to all be built on the same foundation I no longer believe in.

Edit: after I responded to this thread I went and changed my religion profile, I have been wondering if I can call myself Catholic still and I don’t think I can.

If you were Baptised Catholic you will be till the day you die and no one not even satan can take that away from you. Remember there is only one baptisim and if you get rebabtised in another church it is worng!!!

 

[kage_ar]

Doesn’t sound to me like she ever rejected CHrist.Almost seems like that was the one thing she had faith in.

She rejects His Church, Christ said “he who rejects you rejects me”.

She wants babies to be killed!!! No one can love Christ and hate His babies.

 

[wifenmommy]

First, let me say that no one here did anything wrong that suddenly pushed me over the edge. I came here after the decision was all but made in the hope that I would see the kinds of things that I really do like about the Catholic Church. Instead I saw a lot of intolerance, a degree of sexism, intolerance from some, racism from some. I know. I can find that anywhere at anytime. What disappointed me was the bickering over petty rules that have nothing to really do with the true message of the church.
For over five years I’ve felt like a liar at every mass I’ve attended. I’ve felt angry many times as I felt a little farther from God every time I went to mass. Was I involved? Yes. Did I pray? Yes. Did I go to confession? Yes. Retreats? Yes. You name it, I did it. I finally made a list, and it was clear I was not ( in my heart) Catholic and it wasn’t likely I ever would be.

1. I don’t believe in the pope’s of the magesterium’s infallibility
2. I don’t believe the pope is St. Peter’s successor. I think it’s a manmade office.
3. I don’t believe St. Peter is “the rock” Jesus was speaking of.
4. I don’t believe in the Immaculate Conception or the Assumption, and looking back on it, I never have.
5. I don’t think Catholic clergy are any more valid than protestant clergy or have any special abilities that a protestant clergy person would not have
6. I’ve never believed that any saint could intercede for me and felt like a liar anytime I said a Hail Mary.
7. I believe the Catholic Church is part of the one true church but is not THE one true church
8. I’m pro choice and have marched for pro choice rights and probably will again
9. I’m in favor of contraception, use it, and will not apologize or ask forgiveness for doing so
10. I’m in favor of capital punishment and I can see situations where euthanasia would be a good thing
11. I support the ordination of women
12. Having known a lesbian couple as our neighbors for over 20 years I think the Church should give their relationship some recognition. I don’t care what the church wants to call it, but they’ve earned something. They have been the epitome of what the Catholic Church teaches, they just happen to be both women. So they’re just, as one of our deacons calls them “the God damn dykes” who he tries to place out of public view.
13. I think it’s entirely possible that Jesus had brothers and sisters and that Mary and Joseph’s marriage was a normal one after Jesus’ birth
14. I do not pray for the souls of the departed as I feel they are totally beyond my prayers and in the hands of the lord
15. I believe the sacraments(als) of many protestant churches are just as valid as those in any Catholic church.
    On Palm Sunday, I will become a member of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. I told my mother today, and I was shocked at how well she took it. She was curious rather than hurt and wants to know much more about the ELCA as she knows Lutherans as “sort of like Catholics but without the Virgin Mary.” So, she wants to learn more.

Wow…why on earth, feeling this way would you ever come to this board for advice?? It seems your mind has been made up for quite a while now. If you are “brave” enough to think that killing babies is ok and to dispute things which come from the Bible, why were you not brave enough to be able to speak to your mother about your choice? You cant possibly blame us or the One True Church for how you feel, you feel the way you do because obviously you want a “feel good, go with the flow, anything you want to do is fine, dont ask me to be inconvenienced at all” faith. When you are ready for REAL faith, the One True Faith, you will come back. IMHO, I think you may possibly be a troll…

 

[Rascalking]

Alot of these questions are things that I struggle with as well.

Good luck to you my sister in Christ. I’ll keep you in my prayers.

 

[Della]

First, let me say that no one here did anything wrong that suddenly pushed me over the edge. I came here after the decision was all but made in the hope that I would see the kinds of things that I really do like about the Catholic Church. Instead I saw a lot of intolerance, a degree of sexism, intolerance from some, racism from some. I know. I can find that anywhere at anytime. What disappointed me was the bickering over petty rules that have nothing to really do with the true message of the church.
For over five years I’ve felt like a liar at every mass I’ve attended. I’ve felt angry many times as I felt a little farther from God every time I went to mass. Was I involved? Yes. Did I pray? Yes. Did I go to confession? Yes. Retreats? Yes. You name it, I did it. I finally made a list, and it was clear I was not ( in my heart) Catholic and it wasn’t likely I ever would be.

1. I don’t believe in the pope’s of the magesterium’s infallibility
2. I don’t believe the pope is St. Peter’s successor. I think it’s a manmade office.
3. I don’t believe St. Peter is “the rock” Jesus was speaking of.
4. I don’t believe in the Immaculate Conception or the Assumption, and looking back on it, I never have.
5. I don’t think Catholic clergy are any more valid than protestant clergy or have any special abilities that a protestant clergy person would not have
6. I’ve never believed that any saint could intercede for me and felt like a liar anytime I said a Hail Mary.
7. I believe the Catholic Church is part of the one true church but is not THE one true church
8. I’m pro choice and have marched for pro choice rights and probably will again
9. I’m in favor of contraception, use it, and will not apologize or ask forgiveness for doing so
10. I’m in favor of capital punishment and I can see situations where euthanasia would be a good thing
11. I support the ordination of women
12. Having known a lesbian couple as our neighbors for over 20 years I think the Church should give their relationship some recognition. I don’t care what the church wants to call it, but they’ve earned something. They have been the epitome of what the Catholic Church teaches, they just happen to be both women. So they’re just, as one of our deacons calls them “the God damn dykes” who he tries to place out of public view.
13. I think it’s entirely possible that Jesus had brothers and sisters and that Mary and Joseph’s marriage was a normal one after Jesus’ birth
14. I do not pray for the souls of the departed as I feel they are totally beyond my prayers and in the hands of the lord
15. I believe the sacraments(als) of many protestant churches are just as valid as those in any Catholic church.
    On Palm Sunday, I will become a member of the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America. I told my mother today, and I was shocked at how well she took it. She was curious rather than hurt and wants to know much more about the ELCA as she knows Lutherans as “sort of like Catholics but without the Virgin Mary.” So, she wants to learn more.

These are all (except for #10) Protestant positions that you would never have been taught in a Catholic school/parish except by others being influenced by Protestants or by secular society. If you want to be a secularized Lutheran that’s up to you, but I can’t believe you formed your opinions as a faithful, practicing Catholic.

I note you made no comment about the Real Presence in your list of teachings you reject. This may be what brings you back to the Church and to aligning your heart and mind to that of Christ not to the world, which is in the business of stroking egos instead of telling the truth.

As to #10, the Church does not and never has taught that capital punishment is intrinsically evil. The Church discourages it’s implementation because it is usually not necessary, but it does not violate the commandment against murder, whereas abortion most certainly does.

 

[monicatholic]

Wow…why on earth, feeling this way would you ever come to this board for advice??

that’s what i thought, too.

there’s not an aplogetic in the world that can undo all this error. conversely, it would seem that faulty teaching couldn’t produce this much error, either.

forgive my presumption LB, but i read some real pain in this llist of rejections. perhaps some crisis or profound disappointment has drawn these conclusions in you?

an astonishing, mysterious thing may come to pass in your life, Looking Back, and that is this: perhaps it was heartbreak that made you flee from God’s revelation of Himself in His Church, and it may very well be heartbreak that brings you back.

i’m sorry for every minute that you attempt to discover, heal, realize and believe outside the fulness of His grace. but I believe and trust with all my heart that Our Heavenly Father wants you to return home to the true sacramental grace, purchased by Christ’s blood on the cross, and found in superabundance in the Sacraments, especially the Eucharist. and I beleive and will pray that He guides you into the fullness of His grace.

same for you flying fish.

same for you rascalking.

 

[Rascalking]

that’s what i thought, too.

there’s not an aplogetic in the world that can undo all this error. conversely, it would seem that faulty teaching couldn’t produce this much error, either.

forgive my presumption LB, but i read some real pain in this llist of rejections. perhaps some crisis or profound disappointment has drawn these conclusions in you?

an astonishing, mysterious thing may come to pass in your life, Looking Back, and that is this: perhaps it was heartbreak that made you flee from God’s revelation of Himself in His Church, and it may very well be heartbreak that brings you back.

i’m sorry for every minute that you attempt to discover, heal, realize and believe outside the fulness of His grace. but I believe and trust with all my heart that Our Heavenly Father wants you to return home to the true sacramental grace, purchased by Christ’s blood on the cross, and found in superabundance in the Sacraments, especially the Eucharist. and I beleive and will pray that He guides you into the fullness of His grace.

same for you flying fish.

same for you rascalking.

Um…thank you!

I’m a practicing catholic who can admit to not understanding what the church teaches. Struggle does not mean not accepting.

But thanks just the same. Next time don’t assume things through a few posts.

 

[monicatholic]

Struggle does not mean not accepting.

But thanks just the same. Next time don’t assume things through a few posts.

rascalking, i think i’m not assuming. i read every word you post. you’re interesting and sincere. when i write i pray for you to return to fulnness, i do mean that. that you, over time, and with God’s grace can resolve your struggles, and you can embrace the Church’s teachings with the fullness of trust and faith.

and that, in the process, you receive an increase in your intesting and engaging ability to ponder things.

so. yeah. i’m praying for you.

 

[Rascalking]

rascalking, i think i’m not assuming. i read every word you post. you’re interesting and sincere. when i write i pray for you to return to fulnness, i do mean that. that you, over time, and with God’s grace can resolve your struggles, and you can embrace the Church’s teachings with the fullness of trust and faith.

and that, in the process, you receive an increase in your intesting and engaging ability to ponder things.

so. yeah. i’m praying for you.

Okay, thanks.Sorry I misunderstood your post.

God Bless.

 

[psalm42]

I like this discussion and I have to post! I grew up Catholic and became anti-Catholic, or steered away from the Church in my latter high school years and then during most of my college life. I would love to tell my parents and siblings how I wasn’t “Catholic” anymore. They had 6 of us and I am sure it pained them.

As of the past year and a half to two years (I am almost 25), I have prayed for God’s Truth to be shown to me. And with all my prejudices, after researching and praying with an open heart I went back to Catholicism. I used to be ashamed I was even remotely Catholic. What was I thinking?!

I can happily say I am so happy to be Catholic today and I am just starting to realize the beauty of Catholicism. I am still reading and praying. I still struggle. I want to be able to defend fully all of the teachings.

I was extremely ani-Catholic but all it took me was some research and praying and getting over my stubborn self. Yay!

 

[Della]

I like this discussion and I have to post! I grew up Catholic and became anti-Catholic, or steered away from the Church in my latter high school years and then during most of my college life. I would love to tell my parents and siblings how I wasn’t “Catholic” anymore. They had 6 of us and I am sure it pained them.

As of the past year and a half to two years (I am almost 25), I have prayed for God’s Truth to be shown to me. And with all my prejudices, after researching and praying with an open heart I went back to Catholicism. I used to be ashamed I was even remotely Catholic. What was I thinking?!

I can happily say I am so happy to be Catholic today and I am just starting to realize the beauty of Catholicism. I am still reading and praying. I still struggle. I want to be able to defend fully all of the teachings.

I was extremely ani-Catholic but all it took me was some research and praying and getting over my stubborn self. Yay!

God’s grace is amazing, isn’t it? Thanks for sharing your story!

As someone who “converted” to Catholicism from a very anti-Catholic tradition, I can relate, in part. I never disappointed my parents by my conversion–they were both deceased by then, for instance. But I too struggled and prayed and had to surrender my pride in order to embrace the truths of the Church.

Everything hung on the Church’s authority, for me. If the Catholic Church is what it claims to be then I owe it my full allegiance, even if I don’t understand everything or know everything. I came to trust it because Christ had founded it, promised it infallibility and that he would never leave it. That being the case, whatever the Church teaches is Christ speaking to us. What more does anyone need to accept to begin the process of being transformed into the “full stature of Christ”?

 

[kresbrook]

I read some of you past posts to get a better idea of “who you are” before answering this question, and maybe someone else answered the same way, I didn’t have time to read all the post, I just read yours.
I agree that its going to be painful no matter how or where you tell your Mom. She will feel that she has failed, and will wonder “where she went wrong” in your religious upbringing. Its a natural response, be preparred for her to be hurt,
As someone who contemplated leaveing myself, I would take the time to do some independant research on the Catholic Church. Don’t just look at these forums, don’t just listen to the Priest at your local parish. Dig deeper, do some reading.
When I went searching, I decided that I wanted to follow the Truth or nothing at all. I didn’t want to join a social club, I was searching for the Truth. After researching the Chruch Father’s and looking at both sides of Christianity (protestant & Catholic) with an open mind, I came back to the Catholic Church. You will find much more acceptance from your Mother if you have a concreat understanding of both sides of your decission.
Make sure you fully understand the doctrine of the Catholic Church on the items you mentioned and your mother will be more accepting of your decission. I know I have a lot more respect for Protestants who really understand both the Catholic Church and the Protestant Church and choose the Protestant Church than for those who seem to just not like Catholic “rules”.

 

[FiberZilla]

After much (read years) of thought, study, prayers, meetings with pastors and priests, I’ve decided to take the final step and leave the Catholic Church. Any thoughts on how, when, and where I should break the news to my parents. I know my dad will be fine with it. My mother will be hurt. But, I know, without any shadow of doubt, that it’s the right thing.

Congratulations. Hopefully you have found a good Bible preaching church community. Your best course of action is to just tell her. Pick a time when you can spend time alone with her. Be prepared to give your reasons for doing so and back it up with scripture. Above all, don’t fall for the easy-believism so prevelalent in evangelical christianity these days. Saving faith involves turning from sin, taking up your cross and truly following Christ.

 

[Della]

Congratulations. Hopefully you have found a good Bible preaching church community. Your best course of action is to just tell her. Pick a time when you can spend time alone with her. Be prepared to give your reasons for doing so and back it up with scripture.** Above all, don’t fall for the easy-believism so prevelalent in evangelical christianity these days.**

Ah, doesn’t that kind of argue against your own advice here? What authority should she or any of us accept? Yours or someone else’s or just anyone’s? If you want everyone to be his own pope, you have to accept that unity of belief and practice is impossible. Indeed, we see it clearly in all the Bible believing communities that can’t agreed on basic issues, such as baptism or communion or divorce, etc. Sorry, I couldn’t recommend this to others or congratulate anyone who embraces such a bad idea.

 

[FiberZilla]

1. I’m pro choice and have marched for pro choice rights and probably will again
2. Having known a lesbian couple as our neighbors for over 20 years I think the Church should give their relationship some recognition. I don’t care what the church wants to call it, but they’ve earned something. They have been the epitome of what the Catholic Church teaches, they just happen to be both women. So they’re just, as one of our deacons calls them “the God damn dykes” who he tries to place out of public view.

According to scripture, anyone who holds these views cannot be a follower of Jesus Christ.

 

[Della]

According to scripture, anyone who holds these views cannot be a follower of Jesus Christ.

Well, one who holds that homosexual relations are all right certainly isn’t following Christ’s teachings. I have to agree with Looking Back that calling such people “God damn dykes” is not warranted nor charitable. They need our help not our condemnation as people. We must call sin sin, but we must also be loving towards sinners. Yes?

In any case, LB has been overly influenced by the culture in which we live on this and other issues. G. K. Chesterton once wrote that those who follow the “spirit of the age” will find themselves widowed in the next age. As he also wrote, only the truths Christ gave his Church free us from being children of our age instead of children of God.

 

[Jane11]

For Della, I couldn’t have said it better myself. Good job.

 

[Della]

For Della, I couldn’t have said it better myself. Good job.

Thank you for the kinds words. It’s what we’re supposed to do as apologists–tell the truth in love. Easy enough when one has good material.

 

[23eagle23]

Mk 6:7-13
Jesus summoned the Twelve and began to send them out two by two
and gave them authority over unclean spirits.
He instructed them to take nothing for the journey but a walking stick
–no food, no sack, no money in their belts.
They were, however, to wear sandals but not a second tunic.
He said to them,
“Wherever you enter a house, stay there until you leave from there.

Whatever place does not welcome you or listen to you,
leave there and shake the dust off your feet
in testimony against them.”

So they went off and preached repentance.
The Twelve drove out many demons,
and they anointed with oil many who were sick and cured them.

:sad_bye::sad_bye:

 

[RobnBobA1]

I decided to respond in a bit of a different pattern than the above, one I am an athiest and you may not take my posting to heart, or I may get flak for this, but here goes anyways. One of the main reasons that I am an athiest is that I need to be truthful to myself first and foremost. To most believer, they cannot accept how someone cannot simply believe. It is not an action that one can just will themselves into. They can read, study, search for truth with all the open heartedness that they have and still come to different conclusions…hence the birth of all the religions in the world. One searches for the truth in the same book with the same writings, and comes to different interpretations, thus different “catagories” of Christianity. It sounds like the OP has somewhat of the same “tactic” as I, in that to remain with the Cahtolic church with all his convictions when searching for the truth, he has realized that to stay would be a lie to himself. Belief and feelings/emotions all have to come from the self and our unique perspectives of the world. You can be taught the ideas or the how someone should feel in certain situations but you cannot make their core believe them, no matter the literature. It is called faith for a reason. You can have all the post-secondary evidence for your reasons and teach them, but in the end it comes down to faith. There are people today that still believe to their core that the world is flat (flat earth society) Unless they see something, touch it, experience it, have a truly eye opening encounter, they will not believe it in their hearts, and to try to do so, or force themselves to do so would be a lie to thereselves.

As I said…I am an athiest but I can truly understand how a believer or a Catholic truly in their heart believes that they are right and the disappointment when they see someone that they love or care for do what they truly believe in their hearts to be “wrong” - go to a different religion etc. I try to respect that in all aspects of my life, even when accosted and constantly told that I am wrong and asked why I simply do not just believe in what they so feverently believe in. It would be a lie to myself and in truth I do not foresee that belief ever entering my heart no matter the will I give towards it. The same sounds for the OP.

Thats my two cents anyways.