How to FORCE our children to say rosary daily?

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choose_to_love said:
“what they’re doing with the internet and phone sounds normal” If you mean typical, perhaps that is true;
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Normal or typical–both valid. But to teenagers, what’s important is, “Do I fit in with my peers?”

We can shake our heads all we want, but it’s a fact–at a certain point in their development, children (usually in their teen years) place their peer group above their parents as their primary life influence.

This is why it’s so important for churches to nurture good children’s programs that turn into good youth groups with exemplary youth sponsors–because as parents, we want our children to choose GOOD peers who will be a good influence.

It’s not something that can be helped, unless the parents choose to move to an isolated outback somewhere and never expose their children to any peers or allow them any online or television or radio time. No matter what parents do, no matter how “Christian” their home is, the teens WILL switch from “parents/family” to “peers” as their primary life influence. It’s NORMAL teen development and always has been normal teen development.

It’s normal because in order to grow up and mature into self-supporting, self-motivated adults, our children must break away from us, and so during the early teen years, the children turn away from us to their friends.

It’s heartbreaking for many parents, and obviously from this thread, some parents see this as an evil development, which is not true at all, but the way God made teens!

If the teens peers are gang members, or druggies, or anti-religion, or revolutionaries, of course this will be very bad for the teen. But hopefully, the teens main peer group will be his/her church friends, school friends, neighbors, etc. who come from similar backgrounds (church-going, family-centered, patriotic, charitable, healthy, etc.).

One thing that parents can do is make THEIR house a “teen-friendly” gathering spot by creating a space for the teens to hang out; e.g., a “media” room, a basement, etc. Also, always having snacks around! And it goes without saying that this is a time when either Mom or Dad should be at HOME!

Unfortunately, it’s at this time that many parents are working hard at jobs outside the home because college is around the corner and they need to earn some tuition money, and nowadays, teenagers have a very hard time finding any kind of job that pays a high enough wage to add any significant amount to the college fund.

I would suggest that the parents make sure that at least one of them is home during after school and weekend times when the teen is likely to want to hang out with their peers. This is not a good time for the parents to take up a couple hobby (skiing, ballroom dancing, training for races, vintage shopping tours, etc.) that takes them away from the home during their non-working hours. Wait until the kids are gone to college or military–the home will be empty and quiet and THAT’s the time to take up that couple hobby.

I hope all this is helpful.
 
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Have you tried something other than the rosary? It’s not for everyone …

Maybe bible reading as a family or listening to a good speaker for teenagers like Fr Larry? Mix it up… rote prayers isn’t always the answer
 
Everyone likes fun times and I agree things like family game night are great and even one on one time with each child.

A person should be carful not to be Co-Dependent (A misplaced desire to make others happy) with people in general but also with their own children and family. To love is a grueling task.

Children need that ground work and help getting on their feet from their Parents Forcing them at a Young age to pray. Not so much after Puberty then leave it to them.
The Catechism tells us that “prayer is a battle,” and, “The ‘spiritual battle’ of the Christian’s new life is inseparable from the battle of prayer” ( no. 2725 ).
 
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Swiftdove said:
The Catechism tells us that “prayer is a battle,” and, “The ‘spiritual battle’ of the Christian’s new life is inseparable from the battle of prayer” ( no. 2725 ).
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That does not mean we use prayer as a weapon against our children.
 
panorama said:
his is very interesting. What is the logic behind not telling them that I am praying for them? Maybe there is something psychological about this method ?
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The logic of it is that
  1. God can hear and answer your prayers whether or not your children know you’re praying: and
  2. When you pray aloud in your children’s hearing, asking God to change them, they will see it as you being passive-aggressive and controlling.
    They’ll resent it and might well start doing the opposite of what you want just to show you can’t force them to fall into line.
 
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Jesus came for division. He speaks in the Gospel , Mother against Daughter, Father against Son. I think the whole idea here is people against people.

The Rosary is the greatest Spiritual Weapon of all time. By having Spiritual Authority in the house it would be the Father’s responsibility to teach (mandatory prayer time) the Children to pray at an early age so they have the capacity to just do it after puberty in which their age would not mandate forced prayer.

We use the Rosary against ourselves for Gods sake and the greater good.
 
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That is like calling physical discipline Capital Punishment… Clearly prayer time is Not tyranny.

The Rosary is like a conversation with Jesus. A parent practicing the Rosary with their child is a Blessing from God through a Parent.
 
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Consider that forcing the Rosary recitation would be encouraging vain repetition if the kids do not actually pray, they are just parroting words 😦
 
Notice how practically everyone here said on the 4-year-old-refusing-bedtime-prayers thread said that, yes, you should make your kid do prayers with you, and here are some suggestions on how to do that? I definitely “make” my kids participate in our family’s worship, and we teach them the Bible and try to be good examples to them while instructing them in the Christian faith.

The issues here are the following:
  1. I don’t think he realizes it, but the OP seems to regard his kids as adversaries to be defeated. This is isn’t a good way to develop a relationship with his kids.
  2. Speaking of relationship, the OP is having trouble relating to his kids and shows no evidence of doing fun or engaging things with them, instead retreating into prayer and badgering.
  3. The OP is having trouble figuring out how to set and maintain healthy restrictions to his kids’ internet usage.
  4. The OP seems to think that having the words of the Rosary coming out of his kids’ mouths is going to make them holier. I disagree. The Pharisees were renowned for praying excellent, long prayers, but these cut no ice with the Lord. The heart matters.
I wish the OP well. All of us make mistakes parenting. I hope the OP can correct his course. He clearly loves his kids.
 
heidi_storage said:
Notice how practically everyone here said on the 4-year-old-refusing-bedtime-prayers
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One thing that will help is having the Mother or Father, Preferably the Father for the first time pray Binding Prayers over the Children frequently.

Ask Our Blessed Mother under the title Virgin Most Powerful, and do so in the name of Jesus, to bind and cast out in the name of Jesus Christ with the Precious Blood of the Lamb all spirits that are unclean. Do if for spirits of rebelliousness , sinful anger, rejection, deformity, oppression , avarice, sexual deviancy, ect, Anything the Spirit reveals to you

Placing a hand on their head or shoulder pray out loud.
 
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Blockquote There is only one reason why I force them to do this exchange (rosary for the internet):
I believe that by saying a rosary daily with total consecration of their mind, body, & soul to the Immaculate Heart will minimize the damage inflicted upon their souls due to the evil things found easily in the internet.
So far, they stand their ground and they just do not want to say the rosary even if they don’t get the internet. This has been going on for almost a week!
If I go further, for example by taking away their computer & phone, until they are willing to say the rosary for it, will this be so counter productive?
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Sorry to sound harsh, but like JMMJ said, if you’re looking for an excellent way to push them away from the Rosary, I think you’ve found it. Your heart is in the right place, but this is a horrible way to go about it.
 
Sadly, with what the media and the culture is trying to shove down society’s throats, I wouldn’t put it out of the realm of plausibility these days… :cry:
 
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panorama said:
So true, my eldest son (16 years old) is a master of disrespecting (sometimes mocking) his parents
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Although he should be respectful, I can’t help but think he’s expressing frustration…
panorama said:
I suspect there might be a legion of demons who teach him to continuously violate the 4th commandment.
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There’s no reason to suspect the demonic. Please seek spiritual guidance from your Parish Priest.
 
Swiftdove said:
One thing that will help is having the Mother or Father, Preferably the Father for the first time pray Binding Prayers over the Children frequently.

Bind and cast out in the name of Jesus Christ with the Precious Blood of the Lamb all sprits that are un clean. Do if for spirits of rebelliousness , sinful anger, rejection, deformity, oppression , avarice, sexual deviancy, ect, Anything the Sprit reveals to you
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If by ‘help,’ you mean ‘help drive them permanently from the Faith,’ then yes, this is an excellent way to do just that.
 
What you’re advocating isn’t normal and I don’t think anyone would recommend or endorse that course of action.

The OP should consult his Priest and get regular Spiritual Direction.
 
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OP I have been stewing over replying to this thread over night. But I feel compelled to write as I can very much relate to your children.

You sound very much like my parents growing up. They spent so much of my childhood forcing me to pray, go to all night adoration, angelus daily, reading only catholic books, attending home mass etc it had ruined many aspects of my spiritual life. I fully believe they this did this out of love and fear for my soul. However…
  1. I have not said a rosary in around 18 years. Leaves me in a cold sweat.
  2. I am spiritually superficial. Anytime I try to deepen my faith I almost panic. It brings me back to the fear instilled in me every time I did something ‘worldly’.
  3. I felt (and still do) my parents’ allegience to religion took precedence over me no matter what. If I was depressed, sick, sad or rebellious they would insist I did my ridiculous prayer schedule without argument. There were many events they didn’t attend (college graduation for example) as it fell during devotional time. This continues to this day. They missed my son’s birthday party again this year due to first Friday adoration. This is a consistent theme in my life.
  4. I’ve never felt Catholicism has been modelled in a happy way. Due to this I fully embraced my protestant husbands church at the beginning of our marriage. They were so much happier and did things out of love of God not constant fear.
Luckily I am still a faithful catholic and am a regular at mass. I returned fully many years ago. My children will be modelled a healthy prayer life but I teach them prayer is individual and encourage them to pray how they feel comfortable. My eldest loves the bible and draws comfort and prayer from this. My youngest is quick and to the point with his prayers. It suits his personity.

My relationship with my parents has never been repaired (I’m in my late 30s) and it has damaged me somewhat. I love them but to this day they express their disappointment at the way I express my faith.

Please OP consider their feelings. They may feel umempowered and frustrated that you simply don’t care about their wants. And I know you are actually doing this ot of a deep love to save them.
 
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Our Bishop recommends using firm authoritative words and saying " Go back to where you came from Devil."

I have heard exorcists recommend frequent catholic binding prayers over the family by the Father of the family. Also praying the precious blood litany. And the Rosary is most effective for spiritual protection.
 
Swiftdove, I have to say that I have never heard anything as extreme and fear-filled as the practices you recommend. We are the Easter People, surely?

Perhaps it is cultural. May I ask where you live?
 
Paperwight it is your responsibility as a living member of the Church to wage war on the Devil and his minions. You are the Church Militant. Awaken , pick up your cross and fight. Front line is Jesus Christ. There is no room for fear.
You can start by looking up Father Ripperger he will guide you into the fight. God Bless and Keep You.
 
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