How to welcome people in irregular unions to the Church

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Excellent run down, couldn’t have said it better…(I have boys though 🙂 )
 
I heard a great quote on a tv commercial yesterday and it struck me. It said “ we should try to light a fire inside of people, not underneath them”
 
In my opinion it’s a good idea to look at a person’s heart. A person that wants to learn about the Catholic Church and is honestly trying their best, and changing their situation, and are practicing daily conversion, we should be there for these people.

For those whose heart is in a bad place, and continue to commit mortal sin unrepentantly, and try to twist Church teachings to adapt to their own sinful lifestyle, these people are a detriment to the Church and others. For Jesus said, Repent and Sin no more.
 
I agree with your idea but it is very difficult, if not impossible to see inside of a persons heart sometimes. You might see person living in a second marriage and think they are unrepentant, never knowing they cry to God every night asking Him to help put their life back in right order. There has to be a balance in the application of truth and love which will sometimes require incredible delicacy and prudence In speech and our treatment of others .
 
I agree with this as far as we can’t totally judge from looks alone. We can judge from actions. We must be delicate.

To add, if it be God’s will its a good idea to talk to these people, then one will be able to see their heart better.
 
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Mtdobbs said:
You say you have never met anyone who DOES this but have you met anyone who was DONE this?
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I’ve met people who say it happened, but when I got more information it turned out that what really happened was that they took exception to being told an unpleasant truth.
Mtdobbs said:
Have you heard of pregnant unwed mothers being sent away by their catholic families out of shame? It use to happen frequently… and not even that long ago.
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That’s not really the same question as the OP. Also, I see no fault with taking action to protect the reputation of a young woman from being needlessly tarnished.
 
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neophyte said:
Also, I see no fault with taking action to protect the reputation of a young woman from being needlessly tarnished.
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If you read accounts from the women that it happened to (being sent away to give birth out of wedlock), it generally had nothing to do with them and everything to do with their family’s shame. How utterly Christian.
 
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semper_catholicus said:
I never suggested to start with this.
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But you are always emphasizing that they are in the wrong, that they are in sin, that we have to tell them that,
Emphasize Jesus for a change. Emphasize how much He loves us, and wants us to be with Him. That’s what people need to see and feel, before they can correct their situation. But if you speak to people in person the same way you post here, they won’t get that from you.
 
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I have a solution to the problem of gays, unwed moms, etc. who are in an awkward position with regard to the CC.

Send them to my Episcopal church and maybe to the Lutherans. We need the numbers, and we’re willing to minister to them where they are.

If it bothers folks that these people then won’t be in the “one, true church,” then just think of us as a spritual half way house.

I’d rather them have some spiritual home than to be kept at arm’s length, and outside looking in.
 
Mtdobbs said:
Theres a great song by Casting Crowns called “If we are the body”
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Love it!!!
Another pertinent Casting Crowns song is “Stained Glass Masquerade”
“But if the invitation’s open, to every heart that has been broken. Maybe then we’d close the curtain on our stained glass masquerade”

We all sin. Yet some of us feel welcome in church while others don’t. We are to be imitators of Christ, not judge and jury. Why is it so easy for some to see the speck of sawdust in another’s eye, yet we don’t see the plank in our own eyes? I think churches should be a loving place of welcome where anyone can come and hear the gospel message. We are all God’s sheep and that he would leave the 99 to rescue the one is the attitude we should have as a church in welcoming all.
 
Pup7 said:
If you read accounts from the women that it happened to (being sent away to give birth out of wedlock), it generally had nothing to do with them and everything to do with their family’s shame.
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Perhaps, but, again, it has little to do with the question of the OP.
 
Exactly, with charity and clarity. If we are just looking for human respect, and do not tell them the truth, we will not help them.
 
QContinuum said:
I’d rather them have some spiritual home than to be kept at arm’s length, and outside looking in.
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I’m not at all aware of any significant number of people who think that we should do that, and it’s slanderous to claim that those who insist on the clear and consistent teaching of the Church are among them.
 
neophyte said:
Perhaps, but, again, it has little to do with the question of the OP.
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In a way it does, with all this talk of scandal and its 4,325 connotations/interpretations.

And I think an occasional comment off-topic isn’t the end of the world.
neophyte said:
I’m not at all aware of any significant number of people who think that we should do that, and it’s slanderous to claim that those who insist on the clear and consistent teaching of the Church are among them.
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Not hardly. Especially as the Church teaches other things in conjunction with it. To read some of these posts you’d think the commenters have never sinned and have never needed mercy - from anyone.
 
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neophyte said:
I’m not at all aware of any significant number of people who think that we should do that, and it’s slanderous to claim that those who insist on the clear and consistent teaching of the Church are among them.
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Don’t believe I’ve claimed anything of the sort. Bearing false witness is uncharitable as well.
 
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neophyte said:
I’m not at all aware of any significant number of people who think that we should do that, and it’s slanderous to claim that those who insist on the clear and consistent teaching of the Church are among them.
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It’s not slanderous to assume that people mean exactly what they say.
 
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