Husband was laid off today

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rayne89:
I want to thank you all for your prayers and encouragement. My husband will be applying for unemployment in the morning, and I will be making a trip the Dept of Human Services to apply for food stamps. As low as I feel about doing that, without me working we need every bit of help we can get.

I also am going to call first thing in the morning to set up an appointment for Disability. Then make phone calls to doctors and hospitals to get medical records.
My husband was laid off 2 years ago and we did ok but I also was able to work nearly full time hours. WIthout that extra income I feel like we have no safety net. I know God will provide. But it’s hard not to feel scared. We were supposed to go to Mayo clinic this spring. I may have once again rely on the generousity of my parents in order to afford the trip.

I know this sounds awful but it’s hard not to be hurt (and sometimes even angry) at my inlaws. My dad has done more to help my husband then his own father. He’s more supportive and understanding. My parents have helped more times then I can keep track of through our marriage. My inlaws are sitting on $10,000 from my husband’s grandparents will that they will only allow us to use for a down payment on a house. I’m praying that they change their minds and let us use some to pay our insurance cobra payments which will suck up more about half of my husbands unemployment checks per month. I can not be with out medical insurance.

It feels good to have my online “family” to support and pray for me and my family during this rough time. Thank you all so much! God Bless you and your families.
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I see you are from Michigan, To apply for unemployment you apply online now and he can do it right this second, Its much easier than it used to be,and calling "marvin every other week is a snap. I get laid off every year from my job

Things will work out just dont get stressed and dont let hubby fall into what is so easy to fall into that being an attitude that is shown to potential employers when you are unemployed,
make sure you help to keep his spirits up and make sure he knows he is still a “man”.
no matter how bad bills may pile up dont let him assume a blame.
so to speak, that will cause that depressed attitude to pop out…

my family will send out our prayers for your family and others whom are or may be in the same boat.

peace be with you
John
 
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she_he:
I see you are from Michigan, To apply for unemployment you apply online now and he can do it right this second, Its much easier than it used to be,and calling "marvin every other week is a snap. I get laid off every year from my job

Things will work out just dont get stressed and dont let hubby fall into what is so easy to fall into that being an attitude that is shown to potential employers when you are unemployed,
make sure you help to keep his spirits up and make sure he knows he is still a “man”.
no matter how bad bills may pile up dont let him assume a blame.
so to speak, that will cause that depressed attitude to pop out…

my family will send out our prayers for your family and others whom are or may be in the same boat.

peace be with you

John
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I did check online but you can only apply from 7am-7pm for some odd reason.

We’ve been down this road once before and trust me I’m very sensitive to how difficult it is for a man to be out of work. He kept apologizing and I told him to stop, it’s not your fault in this economy anyone in Mi involved in the car industry has no gaurantee at this point of any job security. I try to stay positive, I will not let him assume blame for this. He’s also been very encouraging to me because I feel guilty not returning to work when I have a job open for me. Maybe I should just go back and deal with the pain. I have a pretty high tolerence for pain. He doesn’t want me to do that. He says we’ll work it out. But I hate not being able to help.

I’m good at stretching money and finding free things to do so it doesn’t feel like we’re just sitting at home.
 
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Fitz:
The inlaws are praciticing tough love that they feel will help you in the long run. You many not agree, but they have their reasons. I just hope that you get to finally use the money they are holding for you at some point. It would be a great goal.
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I realize my in laws have a very different parenting philosophy but the thing is my parents are 20 years older then them and retired. His parents both have full times jobs. They have no other children. It will fall on parents *again *if they decide they won’t help us. About a decade ago when my husband was still drinking he crashed our car while drinking (thankfully only into a pole). It was my dad to went to the jail to pick him up, my dad who went to court with us, my dad who drove him to work because he had his license suspended, my dad who drove him to AA meetings. His dad’s reaction was "If this happen’s again tell him we will not have a son. " Meaning they would disown him.

When he was in the Navy it was my dad who helped move down there and when he got out it was my dad who helped us move back. When he was going to college for a while it was my dad who was encouraging and supportive while my father-in-law sat back and criticized everything my husband did. When my husbands lung collapsed it was my dad who drove us to emergency.

If we can’t pay our insurance we won’t even have the house we have now because I’d have to lose the house before the health insurance. When we sell our home we could use that towards a down payment on a nicer house. In this day and age you don’t even need a very big down payment but without health insurance with my major medical issues none of that will matter. And it hurts my husband alot that his parents will not do a thing to help us even though I’m sick and have all these issues, and hurts me to see him hurt. He says he thinks my dad loves him more then his own father.

I’m sorry, I’m just venting. I can’t change them and they have no obligation to help us I realize that. But as a parent I can’t see having the means to help and not reaching out to do so. If we didn’t have the negitive history we did with his dad maybe I would feel differently; but this the man that told my husband the only reason he graduated highschool is because he cheated and did not attend his graduation. Nor would he attend his graduation from bootcamp when he joined the Navy and forbid his mother to aswell but this one time she actually stood up to him and went anyway.

I’m sorry, my stress level is showing. Thank you for your encouragement. God Bless.
 
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rayne89:
I did check online but you can only apply from 7am-7pm for some odd reason.

We’ve been down this road once before and trust me I’m very sensitive to how difficult it is for a man to be out of work. He kept apologizing and I told him to stop, it’s not your fault in this economy anyone in Mi involved in the car industry has no gaurantee at this point of any job security. I try to stay positive, I will not let him assume blame for this. He’s also been very encouraging to me because I feel guilty not returning to work when I have a job open for me. Maybe I should just go back and deal with the pain. I have a pretty high tolerence for pain. He doesn’t want me to do that. He says we’ll work it out. But I hate not being able to help.

I’m good at stretching money and finding free things to do so it doesn’t feel like we’re just sitting at home.
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Listen to him for now you going back to work and being in pain will cause him more hurt, wait it out a while things will work out.
and sorry they must have changed that unemployment Yet again when i applied back in November i did so at about 2 am
John
 
Dear St. Joseph, you were yourself once faced with the responsibility of providing the necessities of life for Jesus and Mary. Look down with fatherly compassion upon me in my anxiety over my present inability to support my family. Please help me to find gainful employment very soon, so that this heavy burden of concern will be lifted from my heart and that I am soon able to provide for those whom God has entrusted to my care. Help us to guard against bitterness and discouragement, so that we may emerge from this trial spiritually enriched and with even greater blessings from God. Amen.
 
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rayne89:
Ok so when it rains it pours. I haven’t been able to work because of my health problems so we’ve been barely scraping by month to month and today my husband got laid off. Part of me wants to try to go back to work again because I feel guilty sitting at home when I have a job available to me but today just vacuuming aamd mopping the floor I’ve been in major pain the rest of the day.

I’m overwhelmed right now and scared. I know if it got really bad my parents wouldn’t let us starve but I still owe my dad $700 we borrowed for household repairs. We could really use some prayers .
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I really feel for you. We would be in dire straits if my hubby got laid off. I understand the pain part as I have fibro and arthritis and just doing grocery shopping puts me in a flare. Are you able to buy your medications? Perhaps your doctor can provide samples to tie you over for several months? Most doctors are good with that and they want to get rid of their samples anyway. Also, many churches have food pantries, you should call and if you are low on food perhaps you can pick up a bag of groceries. They are not there solely for homeless people but also for famililes with emergencies such as job loss. Did your hubby apply for unemployment benefits? I don’t know if this is nationwide but in IL if you are an unemployed spouse caring for a disabled dependent you may be able to get an increase in benefits. I’m also keeping you in my prayers.
 
May the Lord Jesus, the Blessed Mother, and Saint Joseph keep you esp. close to their Hearts in this troubled time.
 
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rayne89:
Ok so when it rains it pours. I haven’t been able to work because of my health problems so we’ve been barely scraping by month to month and today my husband got laid off. Part of me wants to try to go back to work again because I feel guilty sitting at home when I have a job available to me but today just vacuuming aamd mopping the floor I’ve been in major pain the rest of the day.

I’m overwhelmed right now and scared. I know if it got really bad my parents wouldn’t let us starve but I still owe my dad $700 we borrowed for household repairs. We could really use some prayers .
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your situation was almost identical to our when my husband, Frank got laid off in 2002! I suffer excruciating lower back and hip pain that keeps me from working at all. My husband wa sunemployed for 15 months befor ehe got back to work! He was earning 42hr at his prior job, and when he finally got a job after 15
months of unemployment, he started at 9hr! After 2 years of being at his current job, he is finally up to 16 hr. When Frank lost his job, it was not his fault. The company “downsized” and took 26 jobs from people who needed them! BAD manangement cost these people their jobs! I know what its like to go thriugh really hard times! We been to the food bank, and received help from
charities, and my family. I cannot afford to pay my family back, but believe me, I will when we can! Pray that your hubby gets a job, and he will! 🙂 I will pray for you both:) God bless you! 🙂

Marilena
 
rayne,

I’m so sorry to hear of your situation. I will be praying for you.

As for the social security, give them a call and they will send you the paperwork to fill out plus do a phone interview to get the ball rolling. You may be eligible for supplimental social security in the meantime. Keep the faith.

You are not alone and in my prayers.

Lisa
 
I called my work, and against everyones advice (including my husband) I’m going back. They are going to let me run a register sitting on a stool. I told them to schedule me 2 days next week and see how that goes. If it goes ok they can schedule me whenever they need me.

We just found out our cobra payment with just medical (not dental) is $900 a month. My husband’s unemployment check will barely be enough to cover the insurance and morgage and lot rent. With not a dime left over for any bill, gas, food or anything. Disability can take many many months and I don’t have that kind of time.

I know that everyone has said not to go back but can I ask that you all pray that God will heal my body so I can help my family.

Thankyou all, God Bless!
 
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rayne89:
I’m sorry, I’m just venting. I can’t change them and they have no obligation to help us I realize that. But as a parent I can’t see having the means to help and not reaching out to do so… I’m sorry, my stress level is showing…
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Rayne…I am so sorry you are under this stress and I know that’s why the seemingly unsupportive behaviour of certain family members stings all the more. For your own mental health, try and put your resentment aside as much as you possibly can and continue to pursue the options you have.

I applaud your efforts to use the resourses that are out there and available to you. Don’t ever be ashamed for seeking help/assistance–that’s what it’s there for!! There’s not a single one of us who gets through this life without needing somone else to hold us up or help us out at some point or another.

Please know we are trying to lift you up in prayer, but also recognize that the stress of this situation can feel so heavy. I try and keep these beautiful words close to my heart whenever I feel overwhelmed:

…“Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you’d walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there is
only one set of footprints.
I don’t understand why when I needed you most
you would leave me.”
The Lord replied “My precious, precious child,
I love you and would never leave you.
During your times of trial and suffereing,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I carried you.”
 
You are in my prayers, please remember to read Matthew 6:25 and on. God will take care of you.
 
Will continue to pray for you, Rayne 😦 I’m so sorry you’re going through this. God bless you and keep your family strong. Keep us updated.
 
Definitely praying for you! I will ask my family to pray for you, as well.

sCV
 
SO sorry Rayne!

I have not read any of the above mails, but just must offer my 2 cents, from experience here friend:

Just know, He WILL find another job. And let Him be the Man, you DO NOT go out and work, and pick up His bucket, (like I did some 14 years ago—BIG MISTAKE)…and will have many negative repercussions if you choose this route…
Tell him you believe in Him, (which you do—right?)…and that you’ll know he’ll be working again soon, (which he will) Believe me I’ve been in your shoes ALOT in my 16 yrs. of marriage, and it’s the total pitts. But men need to know and LEARN today in this world of women wearing the pants in the family that it’s their role to be the providers, not women’s. And BTW, most importantly GOD PROVIDES ALL OUR NEEDS. Trust!!!******He will never let you down. Despite all the hardships we’ve endured Rayne—God is so Faithful. He’s met all our needs. Let your H be the man, OK? If we let our men be the man, they will be!!! (A bit of wisdom I’ve finally learned after 16 yrs of marriage).

God Bless~~
 
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