Husband was laid off today

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sparkle:
SO sorry Rayne!

I have not read any of the above mails, but just must offer my 2 cents, from experience here friend:

Just know, He WILL find another job. And let Him be the Man, you DO NOT go out and work, and pick up His bucket, (like I did some 14 years ago—BIG MISTAKE)…and will have many negative repercussions if you choose this route…
Tell him you believe in Him, (which you do—right?)…and that you’ll know he’ll be working again soon, (which he will) Believe me I’ve been in your shoes ALOT in my 16 yrs. of marriage, and it’s the total pitts. But men need to know and LEARN today in this world of women wearing the pants in the family that it’s their role to be the providers, not women’s. And BTW, most importantly GOD PROVIDES ALL OUR NEEDS. Trust!!!******He will never let you down. Despite all the hardships we’ve endured Rayne—God is so Faithful. He’s met all our needs. Let your H be the man, OK? If we let our men be the man, they will be!!! (A bit of wisdom I’ve finally learned after 16 yrs of marriage).

God Bless~~
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Sparkle I know how you feel about women working, we’ve gone round and round about this before. At this time in my life I do not need to fend off insulting coments about my husband (whom I adore beyond words) and how much of a man he is. My husband was on Monster.com looking for work five minutes after he got home from being laid off. He is looking but looking doesn’t pay the bills. Last time it took five months before he was back to work. In five months we won’t have a home to live in. We are a family and we get through things as a family. My husband is A MAN. You are the one with husband who won’t keep a job or dicipline your children when they treat you with incredible disrespect. Don’t you dare say a word about my husband and what kind of person he is because you don’t have a g.d. clue ok?

Please if you want to be any help to me keep your mouth shut. Do not respond to this, do not give me anymore of your opinions. And go on living your life the way you see fit.
 
I just said a prayer for you and your family. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers throughout the week.

God Bless,

Kerri 🙂
 
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rayne89:
Sparkle I know how you feel about women working, we’ve gone round and round about this before. At this time in my life I do not need to fend off insulting coments about my husband (whom I adore beyond words) and how much of a man he is. My husband was on Monster.com looking for work five minutes after he got home from being laid off. He is looking but looking doesn’t pay the bills. Last time it took five months before he was back to work. In five months we won’t have a home to live in. We are a family and we get through things as a family. My husband is A MAN. You are the one with husband who won’t keep a job or dicipline your children when they treat you with incredible disrespect. Don’t you dare say a word about my husband and what kind of person he is because you don’t have a g.d. clue ok?

Please if you want to be any help to me keep your mouth shut. Do not respond to this, do not give me anymore of your opinions. And go on living your life the way you see fit.
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Rayne I am praying for you:( Listen Sparkle was trying to help, she and all of us worry about you going back to work because of your health, I do not think she was dissing your husband at all. Please Rayne do not let this situation get to you to the point that you inadvertantly hurt someone who was trying to help.:nope: Go to the Saint Vincent De Paul Society and let them know what is going on.
 
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Lisa4Catholics:
Rayne I am praying for you:( Listen Sparkle was trying to help, she and all of us worry about you going back to work because of your health, I do not think she was dissing your husband at all. Please Rayne do not let this situation get to you to the point that you inadvertantly hurt someone who was trying to help.:nope: Go to the Saint Vincent De Paul Society and let them know what is going on.
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Ok yes my post was a bit over the top, I apologize. Sparkle and I have discussed this topic at length before. It’s never been pretty.

I’m sorry that my response was not very Christian. I can deal with a lot of things people say to me whether I like it or not but when someone attacks my husband’s integrity my self control seems to go south. I don’t want to hurt anyones feelings. I don’t agree with Sparkles position but she has the right to her opinions. So as I said I apologize.
 
Perhaps SOME men need to “learn” to be providers, but your husband certainly has shown his willingness to sacrifice and support his family time and again, Rayne. From the way you speak about your amazing husband, he is someone to be admired, respected and emulated. Don’t even trouble yourself over any insinuations which are contrary to what you know to be true about your lovely husband and persevering family. It’s not worth the energy! 🙂
 
:gopray2: praying for you and for your family. Have you thought about applying for Medicaid. With a chronic illness the income limits are usually higher and you won’t be subjected to a prior condition clause. I know the people here in California who are on Medicaid have better healthcare coverage than our private coverage, that is for sure!
 
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Princess_Abby:
Perhaps SOME men need to “learn” to be providers, but your husband certainly has shown his willingness to sacrifice and support his family time and again, Rayne. From the way you speak about your amazing husband, he is someone to be admired, respected and emulated. Don’t even trouble yourself over any insinuations which are contrary to what you know to be true about your lovely husband and persevering family. It’s not worth the energy! 🙂
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My post about you not going back to work had nothing to do with feeling women shouldnt work, I just know that sometimes when someone is down ( most men) in a situation such as this they will feel really down knowing thier wives are out there in pain,
I see nothing wrong with women supporting the family in any ways
I just know how most respond to a job loss esspecially when they are NOT lazy…so i hope you didnt take my pots to mean anything differently…
John
 
I feel very bad about the way I responded to to Sparkle’s post. I have sent her a personal apology and I would like to apologize to everyone for my very unchristian response. You have all been so kind and encouraging to me, and I responded to a particular post in a very ugly manner.

There is a history on this subject matter of women working between Sparkle and I and I had inappropriate knee-jerk reaction to her post.

I sincerely apologize.
God Bless you all.
 
Dear Rayne and Catholic Sister:

Just sent you a PM. Whatever you do and decide what you must do for your family, just know, it is what YOU decided and I’ll pray for you, that it will work. I support you no matter what. Know this. My opinion might be very different from what you decide. But all in all, you are my Catholic Sister in Christ, and to God be the Glory.

I hope and pray Rayne, that your decisions work for you and for your family. I only want the Best for You as your friends do on here. I suppose all responses might be most different, but it is ONLY You who will decide the route your marriage and your family will take.

It’s totally Ok Rayne. I accept your apology, as I know when women are totally frustrated they lash out. I have done it many times myself. Forget it OK? And know I only desire God’s Best for You and Your Family.

God Bless.
 
My husband was laid off several times before he finally managed to take an early retirement. I understand the scaryness and frustration. Check around to see if your state or county or whatever has an insurance program for low-income folk. I found one in our county for a daughtrer who was without a job that was actually free for her. That’s if Medicaid won’t work.
 
Rayne -

You and your DH are shining examples of TEAMWORK. Know I am praying for you, and will offer up my physical pain at work today for your family.

Kage
 
Rayne:

So sorry to hear of your troubles. I am having health issues and money issues too and it’s not any fun! You are both in my prayers. Please, please try to not worry. As a major worrier myself, I can say this! lol. I’m working hard to cast my cares on God too so you have a friend here.

I agree with the poster above though about Medicaid. Surely there must be help available for somone in your position for their medical needs. It may be worth looking into. Personally I think you should take advantage of any and all government help that is available to you both having found yourself in this position through no fault of your own and there’s no shame in that!

Stay strong and God be with you both. 🙂

Amie
 
First of all I want to thank you all so much for your prayers and support. And for the information you have passed along that may be of assistance to us.

I have some good news. The in-laws will allow us to use the money they put aside from my husband’s grandparents will to pay the cobra payments if we need it, which is a huge relief. That was my biggest concern.

I also have a friend whose cousin is a head hunter and she forwarded him my husband’s resume so maybe something will turn up for us soon.

Thanks again so much! God Bless!
 
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rayne89:
Ok yes my post was a bit over the top, I apologize. Sparkle and I have discussed this topic at length before. It’s never been pretty.

I’m sorry that my response was not very Christian. I can deal with a lot of things people say to me whether I like it or not but when someone attacks my husband’s integrity my self control seems to go south. I don’t want to hurt anyones feelings. I don’t agree with Sparkles position but she has the right to her opinions. So as I said I apologize.
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I can’t speak for anyone else, but I don’t think you were uncharitable at all in your answer.

Just wanted you to know that I will make your family a special intention in my prayers. I have walked in your shoes, my friend.

Contact Focus Hope or your local community service agency. You will probably be eligible for commodities. Also, if you have medicinal needs, the United Way does have contacts, too. You can and should contact the Salvation Army, and maybe even the Christian Service (I’m not sure if that’s what it’s officially called) department of the Archdiocese of Detroit can direct you to other programs. Maybe it’ll take a little of the immediate pressure off of your family.

I know it’s hard to see it right now, but that little light at the end of the tunnel is attainable. There is something better out there for your husband.

God bless you and keep you close. (((((rayne & family)))))
 
hi rayne,

I just wanted to let you know that you are protected by the American Disability Act and your employer has to make the necessary accomodations so you can do your job. I heard about the ADA from the local Crohns & Colitis Chapter here.

For more information, go to the website, ccfa.org. You can even call the main HQ in NY (toll free) or a local chapter where you live to get more on this.

Hope this helps.

Best wishes,
Lisa
 
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rayne89:
First of all I want to thank you all so much for your prayers and support. And for the information you have passed along that may be of assistance to us.

I have some good news. The in-laws will allow us to use the money they put aside from my husband’s grandparents will to pay the cobra payments if we need it, which is a huge relief. That was my biggest concern.

I also have a friend whose cousin is a head hunter and she forwarded him my husband’s resume so maybe something will turn up for us soon.

Thanks again so much! God Bless!
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Praise God! That’s some welcome news.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers. Also, if things get tight and you need help getting by until something comes along, check with the nearest St. Vincent de Paul conference. That’s what they’re set up to handle.
 
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crohnie4life:
hi rayne,

I just wanted to let you know that you are protected by the American Disability Act and your employer has to make the necessary accomodations so you can do your job. I heard about the ADA from the local Crohns & Colitis Chapter here.

For more information, go to the website, ccfa.org. You can even call the main HQ in NY (toll free) or a local chapter where you live to get more on this.

Hope this helps.

Best wishes,
Lisa
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Thanks very much for the information. I am blessed that my employers have been fantastic. They pretty much let me set my hours. I talked to another one of the managers today. She scheduling me on the slowest nights and I can work the service desk sitting on a stool. Apparently that had already taken me out of the system as terminated/rehireable so she spent most of the day today going back and forth with HR getting me reinstated with my payrate remaining the same and keeping my senority. I know I am very lucky to have such fantastic people to work with.
 
We just got a phone call from a friend’s husband. They are looking for a hi-lo driver at his work. My husband’s never done that before but he is very willing to learn. He told us to forward his resume to him and he’s see what he could do.

This is a very good company that is very busy with work right now. My friend’s husband started at this place out of highschool and has worked his way up through the company and now is a control engineer and had his college education paid for by the company.

This could be a very good opportunity for us. I don’t want to get to excited incase things don’t pan out but if I could once again ask for your prayers I’d very much appreciate it.

God Bless!
 
We’re with you and hope this proves a well-deserved ray of light in your life!
 
You are in my prayers as well. God always open a door when one closes.
 
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