I am questioning whether I even want to be Catholic or Christian at all

[victoriaxf]

Heya @BenVirtes,

I think you’re fine. You’re doing good deeds. God knows who you are. Whether you find prayer boring is neither here nor there. Try to relax into the amount of religiosity you are able to tolerate, and trust that it will either grow, diminish or stay the same exactly to the amount that is good for you. The decision whether you actually want to be Catholic or Christian will follow accordingly.

Stay kind as you are

 

[Allegra]

I understand that traditional Catholic lifestyle doesn’t necessarily fit in with how you wish to live your life, but that doesn’t seem to be a sensible way to determine if you want to be Catholic. Really, there is only one thing to consider. Do you believe that God created us, died for our sins, and started the Catholic Church to be his Body on Earth so we can be with Him forever? If you believe that, then what choice do you have other than being Catholic? If you don’t, then what’s the point? If you DO believe that the Church was established by God for our salvation, then I agree that you’ve got some stuff to work through. I think with a little bit of study, and yes, prayer you would find that there are other vocations out there and it may be that God has a different plan for you than being a priest or husband.

 

[PennyinCanada]

I have good news for you!
God is real. He is awesome. Until you receive the gift of faith, you are still in a kind of darkness. You are missing out on an incredible experience of God being your father who loves you. When you experience God loving you, everything will be turned upside down. Ask for the gift of faith. Ask and ask some more.

As someone who grew up in a home without Christianity I know how dark it is without Christ. God had mercy on me and gave me the gift of faith when I was in my twenties and now in my fifties, I have never looked back. Walking with God in this faith journey has been amazing. I am grateful every day that I can say “God is in our midst!”

This is what I wish for you. Ask him. And ask that all those rosaries that have been said for the conversion of sinners be applied to you.

We have an amazing God! I don’t want you to miss out another single day of life without him.

It’s like living a lifetime with vision that only sees shades of grey, and darkness. Blurriness. And then something happens, and you suddenly see sunlight, and color, and sparkle on water and stand amazed. I wish this for you. We need you to be plugged into God. We need you to grab onto what God is holding for you! Our time here is very short. Your time to impact the world is now.

God bless you abundantly.

 

[Larquetta]

Thank you for your honesty. I want to let you know that you are not alone in feeling spiritual dryness. You are not alone in questioning your faith. You are not alone in worrying about your future. I am guilty of all these things. I am just a sixteen year old girl who has questioned my faith and my place in the world countless times. Even so, I think I have a bit of wisdom I can impart to you.

You belong in the Church. If you have ever been made to feel that you don’t belong, I apologize. Everyone belongs in the Church. God loves us all more than we could ever comprehend, and He is jealous for us. I believe He wants us in His Church. As Matthew Kelly says, the Church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints. We are all sinners. We all need to go to Confession frequently. We are not Catholics merely out of a sense of obligation to be Catholic, we are Catholics because this indescribably beautiful Church helps us to be fully alive. The Church is a gift from God, and to not accept this gift is foolish.

Do not worry about your spiritual dryness. Many saints have had difficulties with prayer. Prayer is something you have to work at; most people can’t instantly master it.

Do not worry about your vocation. Relax and let Christ take care of that. I know that sounds a little crazy, but Christ has a perfect plan for your life, and all you have to do is trust in Him. As others have already mentioned, you do not have to get married or become a priest. The single life is an option.

Do not worry if you disagree with the Church on some matters. I used to disagree with the Church’s positions on various hot-button issues. I watched YouTube videos and read articles defending Church teachings, and I gradually came to realize that the Church is always right. Perhaps you misunderstand what the Church teaches on certain issues, or perhaps you have never heard an explanation for why the Church teaches what it does.

Go to Confession. Speak to your priest and other Catholics. Ask questions. Give the Church a chance. You will find that the Church is too beautiful to walk away from.

 

[Larquetta]

What a beautiful post. Your words are very touching. God truly is amazing!

 

[Limoncello4021]

Ah, theBible preaching Protestant heresy to Catholics on a Catholic forum again!

 

[Crocus]

The other issue is that I am also holding onto a lot of hatred and resentment and I have not found a way to let it go.

This is what the sacrament of reconciliation was meant for. You are carrying around an enormous weight that is holding you down; take it to confession and leave it there. It’s a start.

Listen to Penny, she is so right! I never heard it put quite that way, but of course, do ask for those rosaries, and ask for the gift of faith.

This is what I wish for you. Ask him. And ask that all those rosaries that have been said for the conversion of sinners be applied to you.

We have an amazing God! I don’t want you to miss out another single day of life without him.

 

[Crocus]

You belong in the Church … You will find that the Church is too beautiful to walk away from.

From first to last, @Larquetta, you are wise beyond your years.