I'm getting a vasectomy :)

[glendab]

P.S. OldNew. I’m wondering if you are aware that there are statistics that say that specifically after a vasectomy men tend to wind up divorced within 5 years of their surgery in much larger numbers than the norm. I cannot provide the specific sources for this since it is something I heard listening to Teresa Tomeo in the mornings on Ave Maria Radio, but she’s a very good talk show host and does her research well so I know it isn’t a made up statistic. You could probably find accurate information about this at PriestsForLife.org and I think if you contact them, they’d be more than happy to assist you and your wife in this life-altering decision. Please try before you reach the point of no return. Your marriage is worth it.

Glenda

 

[captainmike]

Tbh I have no idea. For support, to be talked out of it, create debate who knows. I’ve had second thoughts but I keep coming to the same conclusion which is that this is the best for me.

I really don’t want to have another kid and for there to be complications (I’m not old but not young). Yes I’m aware that’s selfish but as I said, I am what I am.

What is there to debate? The Church says you can’t do this. The real question for you is, are you a Catholic or not?

 

[OldNewCatholic]

Who knows.

The funny thing is it’s not really the extra kids but the fear of birth complications and the impact it would have on the family.

Anyway, from what I’ve read most other Catholics have been using contraception way more than I have been.

 

[Gorgias]

I do know the meaning of confession and I will confess this sin as well as the sin of presumption (among many others).

J,

Are you familiar with what the sin of ‘presumption’ really means? If you commit a sin (e.g., getting a vasectomy), planning on going to confession right after, then you’re committing the sin of presumption – that is, you’re committing a sin and presuming on God’s forgiveness.

So, if you plan to get a vasectomy and go confess it, you’re committing the sin of presumption on that sin.

If you plan to get a vasectomy and go confess it and the sin of presumption, you’re still committing the sin of presumption on these two sins!

So… no, there’s no “Catholic loophole” here. If you plan on sinning and turning around and confessing – such that you get to ‘have your cake and eat it too’ – then you’re committing the sin of presumption; no ‘get out of jail free’ card here…

(As others have mentioned, of course, that doesn’t mean that the Church commands you to have more children – NFP would be the appropriate way to go, here…)

 

[maryjk]

Tbh I have no idea. For support, to be talked out of it, create debate who knows. I’ve had second thoughts but I keep coming to the same conclusion which is that this is the best for me.

I really don’t want to have another kid and for there to be complications (I’m not old but not young). Yes I’m aware that’s selfish but as I said, I am what I am.

You are what you are? What? Selfish?

Remember that when your kids act selfishly.

Sorry guys, if this isn’t a troll, then he is one of those people that sits down thinking up ways to upset others.

He doesn’t want to be talked out of it. 'Cause he really doesn’t want another kid.

He knows he isn’t going to get support, here, on a Catholic website.

And there isn’t any debate. Wrong is wrong.

So, why post a statement like this, including a little smile? Two real options. Trying to be a troll or trying to get people upset. Either way, not worth our time.

 

[Gorgias]

Anyway, from what I’ve read most other Catholics have been using contraception way more than I have been.

True dat.

Yet, you’re not responsible for “most other Catholics”. You’re only responsible for your own personal sinfulness – that’s what you’ll be judged on at the end of your life. In the general judgment, when Christ says, “when I was hungry, you didn’t feed me”, the response, “but look! They didn’t feed you, either!” won’t get you moved from the goats to the sheep…

 

[OldNewCatholic]

I’m sorry, this thread was a mistake.

I haven’t actually made decision. In truth I have a while to make my decision as my youngest is only 4 months and breastfeeding pretty much takes care of the contraception. I had a reason for making the thread but I can’t explain what it was as I don’t really know.

Please lock or delete.

God bless

 

[Emily2014]

Hi,
Were you trying to be provocative by using this site? If so, what was the point? You knew what the response would be!
Surely this is a purely private matter between you and your partner. It has nothing to do with anyone else on any website.

 

[Memaw]

Ok ok perhaps the loophole comment was a bit provocative, but to be honest that’s how I feel about it. I’ve got three kids already and this really is the best way to go about it.

As far as not being really sorry you have it completely wrong. I know what I’m doing is wrong in the eyes of god and the church and I feel sorry about it. I’ll continue to feel sorry for it but I’m still going to have it done.

Regards,

J

Your only fooling yourself, your certainly NOT fooling God. God Bless, Memaw

 

[captainrick]

I do know the meaning of confession and I will confess this sin as well as the sin of presumption (among many others). Like I said I feel really bad for what I’m going to do but it is what it is. I admire families who have many children and I have no doubt there is a special place for them in heaven but 3 is enough for me.

God bless,

J

hmmm… By that logic, a mobster could say “Well, I have to go out and kill three people today… But then I’ll go to confession Sunday. What a great loophole!”.

 

[Memaw]

Hi,
Were you trying to be provocative by using this site? If so, what was the point? You knew what the response would be!
Surely this is a purely private matter between you and your partner. It has nothing to do with anyone else on any website.

Oh but that’s not true. Sin hurts the whole Church. We are not alone in this world! It is also NOT just between him and his wife. God must be first in our life !! God Bless, Memaw

 

[Vico]

Ok ok perhaps the loophole comment was a bit provocative, but to be honest that’s how I feel about it. I’ve got three kids already and this really is the best way to go about it.

As far as not being really sorry you have it completely wrong. I know what I’m doing is wrong in the eyes of god and the church and I feel sorry about it. I’ll continue to feel sorry for it but I’m still going to have it done.

Regards,

J

Absolution requires that after sinning one wishes *not to have done it. A confessor may require a reversal or some other act that clearly demonstrates true repentance for the sin and a desire to have never committed the sin in the first place.
*

 

[Memaw]

The problem with this is that confession is not a “get out of jail free card.” If you’re not actually contrite, then the confession is worthless.

And receiving Holy Communion could be sacrilegious !! Not worth it believe me! God Bless, Memaw

 

[GEddie]

Hi all,

I’ve been reading quite a bit on contraception here lately and I’ve come to the conclusion that the best way for me to stop at three kids is to have a vasectomy. Following this I’ll just go to confession and confess the sin. It’s like the ultimate Catholic loop-hole.

Has anyone else done this?

Cheers,

J

Don’t do it.

To commit a (serious) sin while counting on Confession is the further sin of Presumption.

And, of course, once the body goes under anesthesia, all bets are off! Do you really want to risk eternal consequences if you don’t come out of it?

Rethink this issue hard!

ICXC NIKA

 

[RedFox0456]

I’m sorry, this thread was a mistake.

I haven’t actually made decision. In truth I have a while to make my decision as my youngest is only 4 months and breastfeeding pretty much takes care of the contraception. I had a reason for making the thread but I can’t explain what it was as I don’t really know.

Please lock or delete.

God bless

This seems pretty suspicious. First and foremost, if you felt bad about the decision you wouldn’t have included the smiley face in the title. I am going to have to go with either trolling or information gathering. Either one would have benefitted from a provocative title and post.

 

[getysbg]

Ok ok perhaps the loophole comment was a bit provocative, but to be honest that’s how I feel about it. I’ve got three kids already and this really is the best way to go about it.

As far as not being really sorry you have it completely wrong. I know what I’m doing is wrong in the eyes of god and the church and I feel sorry about it. I’ll continue to feel sorry for it but **I’m still going to have it done. **Regards,

J

I did it my way!

 

[Crosscut]

OldNewCatholic,
I think your choice to get a vasectomy is totally fine.

People is against birth control because of the potential to destroy a human life. If you take conception out of the picture then there is no life to harm. I dont know why other forms of birth avoidance (except NFP) are all bad. I think its totally up to the individual, their personal choices, where they are in their relationship with their spouse and family to make this decision.

 

[rcwitness]

I’m sorry, this thread was a mistake.

I haven’t actually made decision. In truth I have a while to make my decision as my youngest is only 4 months and breastfeeding pretty much takes care of the contraception. I had a reason for making the thread but I can’t explain what it was as I don’t really know.

Please lock or delete.

God bless

This was your most rational post
Listen, many of us here can sympathize your situation. It’s a difficult Teaching, but because it does not compromise faith in our Lord at all. This is why many of the Catholic Churches Teachings are rejected… because they do not compromise an unspotted faith in all things. St Paul said, “what does not come from faith is sin.”

There are natural ways to avoid a pregnancy. Contracepting is forcing shut the ultimate purpose in which God fashioned sex. This is reducing what making complete and unhindered love to your wife is intended to be, to a faithless act of carnal pleasure. Is it the worst sin in the world? Of course not. But committing a sin and planning to regret it is not an option. To regret something means you not only wish you never did it, but you realize that our Lord suffered death in order for you to be forgiven of it, and received by the father as spottless.

The instances where people are forgiven a permanent sterilization, are because they are truly remorsefull. You are dangerously treating the Sacrament of Confession as superstition. Please examine your conscience before God. You are taking out the honest prayer before the Holy Spirit and expecting a blessing. This is a huge issue which non Catholics use against the Church Sacrament of Confession to spread heresy.

 

[pensmama87]

My father was supposed to get a vasectomy after my sister was born. He kept putting it off and eventually we ended up with my second sister, who was practically worshipped in our home as the sweetest, most wonderful baby ever. Immediately after her birth my mom got a tubal ligation (so we were a family of four kids at that point).

She still grieves the children that never came after my sister. She still tries to reason herself into why she made a good choice. My youngest sister is 20 years old. I have to think that if my mother was convinced by her reasoning, she wouldn’t still be discussing it 20 years after the fact, and there’s no mistaking the regret on her face.

 

[Hopey]

You are assuming that you survive the surgery and are able to go to confession. There is no guarantee you will make it to confession. That is a great risk, eternal damnation, which you make yourself worthy of.
May you encounter a priest who is worthy enough to figure out your scheme and apply proper penance, even if it be you are denied absolution for the time being. Provided you survive surgery, that is. God have mercy on you. There are no Catholic loop holes, only enemies of Christ bent on their own way.