I'm still breastfeeding my 2.5 year old - getting negative remarks

[mini_me640]

I actually don’t understand how on earth children wean earlier than 2-3 years old. Do they really stop asking? Or do they scream bloody murder without a response until they no longer hope for the breast, !

Mine had no interest in nursing once they were very mobile. It was actually a struggle to keep nursing my son for the 9 months I did. He would get horribly angry when I tried to feed him. He didn’t like bottles either. My daughter was a little better but didn’t want to be cradled for nursing once she could walk at about 10.5 months. She was too worried about keeping up with her older brother. I had wanted to nurse until they were 2 at least but they had other plans!

 

[poker10]

Thanks.

It’s definitely benefitting him b/c if I didn’t breastfeed, he’d cry bloody murder before bed. He emotionally needs it still. He’s that kind of toddler.

I actually sometimes get fed up breastfeeding him b/c his teeth sometimes hurt. It is actually more of a sacrifice for me b/c I also cannot spend the night somewhere or my mild would dry up. I’d love to go to a hotel one night with my husband…we’ve talked about it a few times and don’t go b/c I’m still bfing.

You can breastfeed as long as you feel is needed, but saying it’s benefitting him because he’d cry bloody murder before bed may be a little off. My 3-year-old daughter would cry bloody murder before bed if she didn’t get a glass of juice or some M&Ms because we mistakenly used those as “treats” to try and get her to go to bed on time. Well, it didn’t take long for us to realize that was a mistake as she became dependent on getting these to go to sleep. She didn’t “need” either of these things. We cut out the M&Ms and replaced the juice with water. Of course she went ballistic the first night and to a lesser extent the second. But after she realized we were serious, she was perfectly OK by the third night and has been fine ever since.

 

[maryjk]

“Do you want mommy’s boobie?” is quite a normal question to ask a toddler.

I know many breastfeeding moms, current and former, and was one myself. Not one calls it “boobie.” All use a word like “nurse,” “night night,” or something similar.

I don’t know that I would want my son to refer to breasts as “boobie”, even as a toddler.

What is funny is that I am in another conversation about breastfeeding and we are discussing the fact that breasts are often seen as sex objects rather than ways to feed a child. I don’t know that referring to breasts as boobies helps to fix that misconception.

 

[bearer]

As much as I support breast feeding mothers, I have to admit - this made me cringe just a bit.

LOL, my dad and I called them nums-nums. There’s no harm done in using euphemisms like that. Children learn what their parents teach them. If you don’t put a sexual connotation on breasts, the kid won’t think of them in that way.

What should parents do, break out a human anatomy chart and teach their children the medical terminology?

 

[EasterJoy]

Just posted it on another thread but will put it here too.

I nursed two to 15 months and one til he was 3. I called it “mama” because I knew I would nurse longer than the norm. As they get older, they can learn to wait until it is convenient. However, they will throw a temper tantrum on occasion. And when you are carrying an exhausted 2 year old out of a restaurant because you know they won’t allow you to modestly cover and have an extremely slow let-down reflex, people tend to smile when they see you comforting a child yelling for his “mama”. Not so much when they are screaming “boobie”.

I agree. Whatever you say in front of your kids, let alone what you teach them to say, make sure it is worded so that they can scream it from the back of church or in a crowded restaurant, because some day, they will. (This includes what you say when you drop something on your foot or when someone cuts you off in traffic.)

Do your children a huge favor, and make sure you do not teach them any phrases or family idioms that will embarrass them when their relatives remind their teen selves of their favorite childhood phrases. (For instance, whenever a certain scent was in the air, one family I know used to comment, “gassy mouse”, as if there was a small rodent loose who must have been the real source of this kind of smell. After all, that is a whodunnit you’d rather your five year old not pursue with strangers at church. )

A teen who is reminded by a slightly-older cousin that he or she used to yell “I want boobie!!* I WANT BOOBIE!!!”* in crowded restaurants is going to want to crawl under a piece of furniture and die. Enough said. Give the child the dignity of a polite euphemism.

 

[agapewolf]

LOL, my dad and I called them nums-nums. There’s no harm done in using euphemisms like that. Children learn what their parents teach them. If you don’t put a sexual connotation on breasts, the kid won’t think of them in that way.

What should parents do, break out a human anatomy chart and teach their children the medical terminology?

Actually, this is the correct way to talk about the beauty of the body with children, to use the accurate names for body parts, NOT nicknames. Notice there aren’t any nicknames for the elbow or shoulder, only “sexual” parts.

 

[BettyBoop416]

Actually, this is the correct way to talk about the beauty of the body with children, to use the accurate names for body parts, NOT nicknames. Notice there aren’t any nicknames for the elbow or shoulder, only “sexual” parts.

Excellent point.

 

[Havard]

To the person who said ‘ignore the naysayers’, it does make me a tad uncomfortable when I see/hear people say things like that, and yet readily advocate their own side of that issue.

As long as people observe each other’s personal/familial autonomy and are respectful, I think it’s legitimate for them to express their knowledge and opinions.

 

[EasterJoy]

Actually, this is the correct way to talk about the beauty of the body with children, to use the accurate names for body parts, NOT nicknames. Notice there aren’t any nicknames for the elbow or shoulder, only “sexual” parts.

Your mitts, meat hooks, funny bone, tummy, belly button, pinkie, piggies, mug, mop, and noggin are not sexual parts.

(It is probable that mothers have also invented non-complimentary names for elbows that happen to be resting on the dinner table and feet that are not where they belong. )

Shoulders? Well, shoulders are sensitive, and have no sense of humor. It can’t be helped.

 

[bearer]

Actually, this is the correct way to talk about the beauty of the body with children, to use the accurate names for body parts, NOT nicknames. Notice there aren’t any nicknames for the elbow or shoulder, only “sexual” parts.

What importance is accuracy when you’re dealing with an infant? The nickname was a reflection of the sound made. It’s easier for a young child to properly say num-nums than breasts or mammaries anyway.

It appears, however, that an interesting distinction has been made in the thread. Men don’t seem to worry as much about their children saying such things in public or in private. I suppose we take it in stride. As I alluded to previously, there’s a difference between speaking of the body in healthy manner and otherwise sexualizing it unnecessarily. Respect and prudishness are not always synonymous.

 

[cmscms]

My husband is all for it and in fact encourages it. He says to my son, “You want mommy’s boobie?”

My son says, “Drink boobie!”

I’m lucky in that regard. He is very nuturing towards his kids.

This is what makes it wrong. No man who respects his wife would EVER think of saying to his son ‘Do you want mommies boobie’.

If you can respectfully breastfeed a child… I don’t really know at what age they should be weened. But to be disrespectul of the process is just gross. If we want society to see breast as something God gave mothers to feed their children, then we should respect our bodies the way God wants us to.

I had a neighbour and her daughter’s would touch their chest and say ‘This is my boobie’ and the mom wouls say ‘Yes it is’. When the grandmother came over, the 2.5 year old ran up touch her breast and said ‘Granny, this is your boobie’. The mother was embarassed (as if she didn’t see it coming)

When that kid sat on my lap and touched me and said it to me, needless to say she got a swift clip on the hand

CM

 

[LucyLight]

This is what makes it wrong. No man who respects his wife would EVER think of saying to his son ‘Do you want mommies boobie’.

If you can respectfully breastfeed a child… I don’t really know at what age they should be weened. But to be disrespectul of the process is just gross. If we want society to see breast as something God gave mothers to feed their children, then we should respect our bodies the way God wants us to.

I had a neighbour and her daughter’s would touch their chest and say ‘This is my boobie’ and the mom wouls say ‘Yes it is’. When the grandmother came over, the 2.5 year old ran up touch her breast and said ‘Granny, this is your boobie’. The mother was embarassed (as if she didn’t see it coming)

When that kid sat on my lap and touched me and said it to me, needless to say she got a swift clip on the hand

CM

What? So now he doesn’t respect his wife because he called it a boobie? You are talking about a 2.5 year old not a little adult. They don’t understand boundries and they are on a constant quest for knowledge. If a kid did that to me I would think it was cute. I certainly would not hit their hand.

 

[mini_me640]

What? So now he doesn’t respect his wife because he called it a boobie? You are talking about a 2.5 year old not a little adult. They don’t understand boundries and they are on a constant quest for knowledge. If a kid did that to me I would think it was cute. I certainly would not hit their hand.

 

[Serap]

What? So now he doesn’t respect his wife because he called it a boobie? You are talking about a 2.5 year old not a little adult. They don’t understand boundries and they are on a constant quest for knowledge. If a kid did that to me I would think it was cute. I certainly would not hit their hand.

My son does grab my boobies in public and I remove his hand and tell them that they are mommy’s private place. If he objects, my husband will give him a stern look and tell him not to touch mommy there when we are out of our house. My son will stop.

He’s only 2…I really don’t have a problem with him calling it a “boobie” per ce, but I do wish I had thought about it in advance and called it “mama” lol.

My husband respects the fact that I put my own comfort aside and provide a bond with my son that no one else on this earth could give him.

I respect the opinions that think it’s “strange” or “wierd” b/c before I had kids, I honestly felt the same way. Now I realize how wrong my opinion was. It was based on ignorance really…I just didn’t know any better.

 

[cmscms]

What? So now he doesn’t respect his wife because he called it a boobie? .

Yup, a very discusting way to talk about women especially the one who was kind enough to give you children.

You are talking about a 2.5 year old not a little adult. They don’t understand boundries and they are on a constant quest for knowledge. .

All the more reason adults should teach them properly. If you teach a 2.5 year old boy it is OK to be disrespectful, they will grow up to be men with no respect for women. You don’t seriously think you can tell a teenage boy ‘Now that you are 14, no more calling them boobies. You are now at an age to respect women’

If a kid did that to me I would think it was cute. I certainly would not hit their hand.

I value my body and let no one disrecpt it

CM

 

[MariaG]

Well I am becoming sorry I posted my experience on what we called nursing. My intent was simply to give new ideas since “mama” definitely sounds better to my ears at the top of a 2 year olds lungs in public than boobie. But that in no way was meant to criticize what others choose to call it or what words they consider it appropriate for their child to use.

I hope that those of you who found it useful will pass it on as I found it very useful myself.

And it does not go without saying that anyone’s response to an innocent child who is not even my own, would get slapped for innocence.

I pray the thread can get back to the support of the poster with possible ideas on how to avoid negative comments instead of adding them.

God bless

 

[EasterJoy]

I think if you want people to mind their own business, you need to throw them a bone and teach your family to talk about your private business in a private manner that does not force them to picture what you’re talking about.

I don’t think anybody is suggesting that a child who can barely talk ought to use medical terms. I think it is being suggested that the general public (not to mention the child himself, if he’s ever treated to being a teen watching home movies of himself) might be more comfortable if a euphemism were used that would make it easier for everyone to mind his or her own business about what the child was asking for.

It’s not about being ashamed of it, it’s about allowing people to give you some sense of privacy…not just mom’s but the child’s, too. There may come a time when a 3 or 4 year old would like to be able to ask his mother to be breastfeed him without opening a conversation concerning the propriety of his request and his family’s choices with total strangers.

It’s kind of like teaching a child to say “I need to use the restroom” rather than teaching him or her explicitly specify which bodily function needs a place in which to be executed.

 

[MariaG]

He’s only 2…I really don’t have a problem with him calling it a “boobie” per ce, but I do wish I had thought about it in advance and called it “mama” lol.

.

Lol! Glad to hear it! I won’t feel sorry after all! And there is always the next one you can do the “mama” with

 

[MariaG]

I think if you want people to mind their own business, you need to throw them a bone and teach your family to talk about your private business in a private manner that does not force them to picture what you’re talking about.

I don’t think anybody is suggesting that a child who can barely talk ought to use medical terms. I think it is being suggested that the general public (not to mention the child himself, if he’s ever treated to being a teen watching home movies of himself) might be more comfortable if a euphemism were used that would make it easier for everyone to mind his or her own business about what the child was asking for.

It’s not about being ashamed of it, it’s about allowing people to give you some sense of privacy…not just mom’s but the child’s, too. There may come a time when a 3 or 4 year old would like to be able to ask his mother to be breastfeed him without opening a conversation concerning the propriety of his request and his family’s choices with total strangers.

It’s kind of like teaching a child to say “I need to use the restroom” rather than teaching him or her explicitly specify which bodily function needs a place in which to be executed.

 

[Serap]

This is what makes it wrong. No man who respects his wife would EVER think of saying to his son ‘Do you want mommies boobie’.

If you can respectfully breastfeed a child… I don’t really know at what age they should be weened. But to be disrespectul of the process is just gross. If we want society to see breast as something God gave mothers to feed their children, then we should respect our bodies the way God wants us to.

I had a neighbour and her daughter’s would touch their chest and say ‘This is my boobie’ and the mom wouls say ‘Yes it is’. When the grandmother came over, the 2.5 year old ran up touch her breast and said ‘Granny, this is your boobie’. The mother was embarassed (as if she didn’t see it coming)

When that kid sat on my lap and touched me and said it to me, needless to say she got a swift clip on the hand

CM

I 100% disagree with everything you have written…respectfully