Is infidelity grounds for annulment?

[Theresalux]

Purely out of curiosity, I am wondering…Is infidelity grounds for annulment?

I have been blessed with an amazing and holy man as my fiancé and soon to be husband, and this question in no way is a reflection of our relationship. However, I know people who have rushed into a marriage with a less than ideal mate (Catholic in name only and openly sinning in ways that the world sees as normal and acceptable) and have had their spouses cheat on them (Not to say that the ways they were sinning made them deserving of anything, but the lack of virtue could have a weaken the relationship in the first place and allowed for Satan to have a foothold). Three families I know personally have had either a wife or husband engage in infidelity! Truly saddens me. I can’t imagine having someone do that and then not be able to annual the marriage. Because if they were true to their vows to be faithful then how could this happen? I’m genuinely curious about what Mother Church says on this issue and her word I will accept.

 

[Lou2U]

I don’t believe it is.

An annulment focuses on the conditions when the marriage occurred, not afterwards. So if someone is granted an annulment, the marriage did not take place because it was never valid.

Someone else will be able to explain it much better than I can but I think infidelity in and of itself would not be grounds for an annulment.

 

[Theresalux]

but I think infidelity in and of itself would not be grounds for an annulment

But wouldn’t that be proof in itself that the spouse had no true vow of fidelity?

 

[HopkinsReb]

Lou2U:

but I think infidelity in and of itself would not be grounds for an annulment

But wouldn’t that be proof in itself that the spouse had no true vow of fidelity?

No. It would prove that the spouse is a sinner.

 

[Theresalux]

No. It would prove that the spouse is a sinner.

I may be mistaken, but I thought that annulments could take place if it were proven that the spouse was not true or not committed to the vows they said. Therefore, the act of infidelity being in direct contrast to their vow.

 

[HopkinsReb]

HopkinsReb:

No. It would prove that the spouse is a sinner.

I may be mistaken, but I thought that annulments could take place if it were proven that the spouse was not true or not committed to the vows they said. Therefore, the act of infidelity being in direct contrast to their vow.

A person’s failing to live up to a vow is not evidence of the vow’s insincerity.

 

[Lou2U]

I may be mistaken, but I thought that annulments could take place if it were proven that the spouse was not true or not committed to the vows they said. Therefore, the act of infidelity being in direct contrast to their vow.

Annulments focus on the validity of the marriage at the time it occurred. Not about the vows being kept throughout the marriage.

Edit - I found an article from Catholic Answers which explains a little more:

What Are Grounds for Annulment? | Catholic Answers Magazine

It is important to note that grounds for annulment, if any, are present at the time consent is exchanged on the wedding day. Similar factors that show up later in the marriage do not, of themselves, constitute grounds for annulment. Indeed, a spouse who intends on the wedding day to always be a faithful spouse might change his mind later on. So a spouse’s infidelity years into the marriage does not necessarily mean that the marriage is null.

On the other hand, unfaithfulness at any point in the marriage might be considered by the marriage tribunal to be evidence of a spouse’s exclusion of the element of unity at the time the marriage was contracted. Such matters are for the sole determination of the tribunal.

 

[phil19034]

Purely out of curiosity, I am wondering…Is infidelity grounds for annulment?

Objectively speaking, no.

But it could be a symptom of an invalid marriage, subjectively speaking. But in of itself, infidelity isn’t grounds for an annulment.

 

[twf]

It should be added that infidelity is grounds for a civil divorce / separation, as per Canon law… but the right to remarry is a completely different question contingent upon an annulment.

As an aside, it bugs me that in our modern society everyone, including Catholics, assumes that a civilly divorced person will seek to remarry. My wife and I came very close to divorce not too long ago, and I was preparing myself for life long separation while living a celibate life… which is the most one can do to respect one’s vows once a marriage falls apart.

 

[phil19034]

Lou2U:

but I think infidelity in and of itself would not be grounds for an annulment

But wouldn’t that be proof in itself that the spouse had no true vow of fidelity?

Not necessarily. It’s only proves that they were a sinner.

With infidelity, the question is really this… Was their something defective at the time of the married which lead to this spouse cheating? Or no?

For example: Let’s say the cheating spouse really wants to have children but the other spouse doesn’t. When the couple got married, the one spouse simply said he/she was open to life in order to get married in the Church to satisfy Grandma, but really does not want kids and would want an abortion if a pregnancy ever occurred. Let’s say that this situation, over time caused a large rift in the marriage until the point where the spouse who wants kids has a moment of weakness after too many drinks.

The couple then divorce. The cheater is guilty of the sin of adultery and is responsible for the sin of divorce. However, is the cheater the reason for an annulment is granted? Not necessarily. In this situation, if an annulment would be granted, it would most likely be because the one who was cheated on never wanted kids to begin with. And if that spouse lied to the cheater about wanting kids, it MIGHT be grounds for an annulment.

But the grounds would NOT be the infelity. The grounds would be the un-openness to life at the time of the wedding.

I pray this makes a little sense.

 

[on_the_hill]

I’m not aware that divorce is a sin. The Church recognizes that there are conditions wherein a civil divorce is the only option available, e.g. a case of abuse.

 

[po18guy]

1. Yes.
2. No.
3. Maybe.

Like adult diapers, it all depends. A complete and thorough invrstigation into the motives for marriage and the mental states of both spouses is undertaken. If one or the other never had the intention of remaining faithful, say, that would quite possibly be grounds.

Lest we forget what we vowed: For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health. A single occurrence of unfaithfulness is cause for prayer, reflection, forgiveness and reconciliation - not to follow the prevailing throwaway cuture and separate what God has joined together.

Not lecturing here, just musing while trying to avoid pontificating.

 

[TheLittleLady]

I can’t imagine having someone do that and then not be able to annual the marriage.

Infidelity is a tragedy.

One thing, people do not “annul” a marriage. The Church will examine after a divorce, they look at the persons prior to the marriage and determine if at the exchange of vows was the consent valid.

Things that happen after the wedding cannot “annul” if the wedding resulted in a valid marriage.

Now, infidelity may be a symptom of a problem that did cause the consent to be invalid.

Because if they were true to their vows to be faithful then how could this happen? I

There are different levels of infidelity. There is a person who in a moment of weakness succumbs to sins of the flesh, there is the person who carries on either many different short term infidelities or long term affairs.

A one time failing is not necessarily a thing that would mean that the consent was invalid. Long term affairs are another thing, but, that is for the Tribunal to decide.

This is something that an engaged couple should discuss prior to marriage. My husband of nearly three decades and I have an understanding. If either of us ever slips and falls, as long as there was no resulting STD or pregnancy, we do not want to know about it. We want the other to go to Confession and keep the details to themselves.

If you are the sort of person who says “if they ever cheat, I am gone” that needs to be talked about with your priest before the wedding.

 

[thistle]

I may be mistaken, but I thought that annulments could take place if it were proven that the spouse was not true or not committed to the vows they said. Therefore, the act of infidelity being in direct contrast to their vow.

That is not correct. Grounds for annulment apply up to the actual marriage. Nothing after marriage are grounds for annulment although some action during the marriage may help support grounds that happened prior to the marriage.

 

[1ke]

Purely out of curiosity, I am wondering…Is infidelity grounds for annulment?

No.

I can’t imagine having someone do that and then not be able to annual the marriage

The Church does not annul marriages. That would mean the Church makes the marriage invalid.

The Church issues a decree of nullity, meaning there was no marriage contracted at the time the vows were exchange due to a defect or impediment.

Because if they were true to their vows to be faithful then how could this happen?

It is entirely possible to take vows and mean them, and later sin against them.

 

[cmscms]

Lou2U:

but I think infidelity in and of itself would not be grounds for an annulment

But wouldn’t that be proof in itself that the spouse had no true vow of fidelity?

A personal pet peeve of mine is people who ‘take a vow’ and then later say ‘I didn’t mean it’ How can you trust anything that person says in the future. It is really easy after a spouse cheats to say ‘I never meant to be faithfull in the first place’ How can that person go back in time and really remember the intentions on their wedding day.

I often hear divorced people say ‘I didn’t know what I was getting into’ Duh !!! No one knows what the future will holds. No one knows what it is to be married until they are. That’s why they vow ‘for better of for worse’

 

[cmscms]

This is something that an engaged couple should discuss prior to marriage. My husband of nearly three decades and I have an understanding. If either of us ever slips and falls, as long as there was no resulting STD or pregnancy, we do not want to know about it. We want the other to go to Confession and keep the details to themselves.

Wow sounds like you have an awesome marriage

If you are the sort of person who says “if they ever cheat, I am gone” that needs to be talked about with your priest before the wedding.

I agree, it is a bit concerning an engage person is thinking about this

 

[Wesrock]

HopkinsReb:

No. It would prove that the spouse is a sinner.

I may be mistaken, but I thought that annulments could take place if it were proven that the spouse was not true or not committed to the vows they said. Therefore, the act of infidelity being in direct contrast to their vow.

It only matters (for validity) if they understood and meant their vows at the time they made them. Perhaps infidelity is a clue they didn’t. Then again, it may not be. A person can mean something at some point and fall later.

 

[Theresalux]

I agree, it is a bit concerning an engage person is thinking about this

It was out of genuine curiosity that I asked.

I don’t foresee anything like that happening and when I say my vows I will mean it. Till DEATH do us part.

I pray that we will never allow such a foothold for Satan to take hold in us to commit such a sin.

If it ever does happen, then it would be a long road to recovery and redemption and family life would be severely broken, but that is a cross that would need to be taken up. What is broken needs to be fixed not thrown away. I pray I would never be in that situation. But God is good and through Him all things are possible.

 

[PennyinCanada]

I have a comment not so much on annulments but rather dating before marriage. When dating, this is the time that you demonstrate that you are faithful, and the best way to demonstrate it is not having sex before marriage. That’s the time you show that you have the determination and will not to have sex outside of marriage. When is my guy going to demonstrate it if not while we’re dating?

The idea that a guy dates someone, has sex, breaks up and meets a new person, has sex, and does this for a number of years, is actually practicing infidelity. That’s just looking at it without religious glasses on.

God has a plan for dating, for married life. There are no regrets doing it as he designed.