Is romantic attraction and expression sexual in nature?

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That this inclination is objectively disordered is not addressing the object of that disorder as that is later addressed as intrinsically disordered… it addresses the distorted call, the miswiring, the biological misinterpretation of purpose… whatever has given rise to this misdirected attraction. The ordered inclination universally gies rise to attraction to the opposite sex on which the species depends. The Church is not inventing this process, she is conforming her rules and guidelines to created nature.

We don’t know what causes this disordered inclination of same sex attraction but we do know objectively that it is purposeless in natures scheme and a trial to be renounced in Gods scheme.
This is your understand, but I believe incorrect. The word “objectively” is not required if the meaning is as you say. It would be redundant. The church is focussing attention on the disorder in so far as the immoral acts to which it may be directed. There is a lot of baggage in attraction. The attraction to the “intrinsically disordered” things is the concern. Consider the class of acts that are prohibited in this section of the catechism. It is targeted.
 
Grace & Peace!

Sorry, LongingSoul, you’re confusing things here.
Before I spend time replying, I want to understand your belief about the Catholic teaching on this subject.

It sounds like you are saying that the Church *only *prohibits the final act of sex. The intercourse of physical bodies that results with orgasm. You seem to be saying that any form of relationship is licit according to the Church, up to the point of that physical sexual release?

Is that your understanding based on what the CCC says?
 
This is your understand, but I believe incorrect. The word “objectively” is not required if the meaning is as you say. It would be redundant. The church is focussing attention on the disorder in so far as the immoral acts to which it may be directed. There is a lot of baggage in attraction. The attraction to the “intrinsically disordered” things is the concern. Consider the class of acts that are prohibited in this section of the catechism. It is targeted.
What does ‘objectively’ mean to you?
 
Grace & Peace!
The treatment of this scenario is not an invention of anyone on this thread. As Bookcat has contributed many times, CAF apologists have spoken to it before…

“For two men to live in a romantic relationship with one another, whether or not they abstain from sex, violates chastity because it does not conform to the sexual integrity to which mankind is called.”
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12153558&postcount=104
That’s hardly a magisterial statement. Moreover, it brings up this question: surely the celibate can achieve “the sexual integrity to which mankind is called” without being in any sort of romantic relationship–so what does celibacy have in common with matrimony that a chaste same-sex relationship of beloveds cannot possess?
That this inclination is objectively disordered is not addressing the object of that disorder as that is later addressed as intrinsically disordered… it addresses the distorted call, the miswiring, the biological misinterpretation of purpose… whatever has given rise to this misdirected attraction.
Incorrect. A disordered attraction is always to a disordered object. An attraction cannot be morally evaluated without reference to its object. I challenge you to explain to me how you can determine that an attraction or an inclination is disordered without any consideration of its object. What you are saying is that, when it comes to homosexuality, a homosexual will only ever be inclined in an immoral way regardless of whether or not the thing to which s/he is inclined is immoral. This is contrary to catholic teaching regarding concupiscence and desire.
The ordered inclination universally gies rise to attraction to the opposite sex on which the species depends. The Church is not inventing this process, she is conforming her rules and guidelines to created nature.
Sorry, Longing, but you’re making a lot of assumptions here. It is not necessary for everyone to reproduce in order for the species to survive in a healthy way. Universal heterosexuality is hardly needful therefore; nor would it indefatigably lead to offspring for all people so inclined as, even now, not all who experience the heterosexual condition reproduce; nor, given the astounding diversity of nature, would universal heterosexuality be necessarily indicative of a completely natural state of affairs. Moreover, if the church were merely conforming herself to created nature, then certainly a return to polygamy would be more called for than an insistence on monogamy and marriage.
We don’t know what causes this disordered inclination of same sex attraction but we do know objectively that it is purposeless in natures scheme and a trial to be renounced in Gods scheme.
Again, the homosexual inclination is disordered only insofar as it is ordered to an intrinsically disordered act. That’s the catechism, Longing.

Also, we do not, in fact, know with your rather brash certainty that same-sex attraction has no purpose in nature. Some biologists have offered theories regarding the evolutionary purposes same-sex attraction may serve. But even if, one day, your certainties are proved true…so what? As our friend Oscar Wilde has said, “We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless thing is that one admires it intensely.” Surely there’s room in the world for things that are exuberantly and gratuitously purposeless? To my thinking, there should be a greater appreciation for such things: the useless,the beautiful, the free.

You’re getting quite colorful in your description of same-sex attraction as “a trial to be renounced in God’s scheme.” I don’t know exactly what that means–I suspect you chose those words for effect rather than sense. I didn’t know that we were called to renounce our trials, nor am I convinced that same-sex attraction represents, in itself, a de facto trial. Certainly some, as the catechism affirms, will see it that way. But I’m not sure it’s necessary that they do so in order to live a moral life. I suspect, however, that the insistence that it is a trial from many otherwise well-meaning folks is itself constitutive of a burden for same-sex attracted people. I would even go so far as to say that it is precisely this insistence which characterizes the chief “trial” of same-sex attraction.

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
 
This is what I need clarified before I spend time replying.
Before I spend time replying, I want to understand your belief about the Catholic teaching on this subject.

It sounds like you are saying that the Church *only *prohibits the final act of sex. The intercourse of physical bodies that results with orgasm. You seem to be saying that any form of relationship is licit according to the Church, up to the point of that physical sexual release?

Is that your understanding based on what the CCC says?
 
Grace & Peace!
It sounds like you are saying that the Church *only *prohibits the final act of sex. The intercourse of physical bodies that results with orgasm.
The catechism seems very clear to me: it makes a distinction between two things: an act and an inclination. The act it describes as immoral on account of it being intrinsically disordered (i.e., not open to life, biological sexual complementarity, etc.); the inclination to such an immoral object it necessarily describes as an objectively disordered inclination. The catechism is being quite specific.

I understand the catechism to be prohibiting same-sex genital sexual acts. Your use of the word “final” in your post suggests to me that you believe I think that a same-sex relationship between beloveds can/should “stop” before it reaches this “final” act. But that assumes a romantic teleology that I do *not *assume–I do not believe that human intimacy between beloveds is indefatigably ordered to a sexual act, that one thing necessarily follows from another and that all things in this context are consummated in a sexual act lest they be frustrated or rendered impotent. I do not, therefore, believe that the sort of relationship between beloveds that I’m describing (or that SMGS is describing) is one characterized by, “this far and no farther” or “we need to stop now.” On the contrary, the sort of relationship I’m describing is one in which the beloveds find their home in each other in a chaste relationship characterized by mutuality, intimacy, self-sacrifice, growth, and demonstrable human flourishing–a relationship that is un-mercenary and for its own sake, exclusive in that the two in the relationship are mutually committed to each other and bonded to each other in a unique way, but open in the sense that the love that characterizes the relationship is something in which others may participate in that it is a sign of a loving that is, in fact, Divine.
You seem to be saying that any form of relationship is licit according to the Church, up to the point of that physical sexual release?
No. I’m not saying it’s demonstrably licit, but it’s certainly not illicit. It would be a matter of prudential judgment and should probably include the counsel of a sympathetic and well-loved priest.

Also, again, I would object to any sort of “up to the point of” language. The “point” you’re describing is nowhere on the map. So there is no “up to the point.”

(And yes, Rau! Your response in that link is more or less representative of my thinking as well. Thanks!)

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
 
Grace & Peace!

The catechism seems very clear to me: it makes a distinction between two things: an act and an inclination. The act it describes as immoral on account of it being intrinsically disordered (i.e., not open to life, biological sexual complementarity, etc.); the inclination to such an immoral object it necessarily describes as an objectively disordered inclination. The catechism is being quite specific.

I understand the catechism to be prohibiting same-sex genital sexual acts. Your use of the word “final” in your post suggests to me that you believe I think that a same-sex relationship between beloveds can/should “stop” before it reaches this “final” act. But that assumes a romantic teleology that I do *not *assume–I do not believe that human intimacy between beloveds is indefatigably ordered to a sexual act, that one thing necessarily follows from another and that all things in this context are consummated in a sexual act lest they be frustrated or rendered impotent. I do not, therefore, believe that the sort of relationship between beloveds that I’m describing (or that SMGS is describing) is one characterized by, “this far and no farther” or “we need to stop now.” On the contrary, the sort of relationship I’m describing is one in which the beloveds find their home in each other in a chaste relationship characterized by mutuality, intimacy, self-sacrifice, growth, and demonstrable human flourishing–a relationship that is un-mercenary and for its own sake, exclusive in that the two in the relationship are mutually committed to each other and bonded to each other in a unique way, but open in the sense that the love that characterizes the relationship is something in which others may participate in that it is a sign of a loving that is, in fact, Divine.

No. I’m not saying it’s demonstrably licit, but it’s certainly not illicit. It would be a matter of prudential judgment and should probably include the counsel of a sympathetic and well-loved priest.

Also, again, I would object to any sort of “up to the point of” language. The “point” you’re describing is nowhere on the map. So there is no “up to the point.”

(And yes, Rau! Your response in that link is more or less representative of my thinking as well. Thanks!)

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
The error you make in your reading of Church doctrine and its an error many Protestants and new converts make… is that you are reading it through the Protestant lens which starts from a place of our salvation being assured by the act of Baptism. Catholicism permeates the Catholics view of everything in life and sees us as on a journey to salvation, cooperating with the Holy Spirit through the grace of baptism. We are not assured of salvation by our redemption and not free to embrace any perspective we like so long as we stop short of the 10 commandments.

When you read the CCC and say if it doesn’t explicitly define something, then it is free to be defined by my own measures… you aren’t factoring that for a Catholic, the purpose of our lives is ordered towards growth in holiness and obedience and humility, from the first thought of the day onwards. Everything we do is permeated by our cooperative efforts towards final reunion with God in heaven.

So when you say you don’t like “up to the point” language, I’m seeing that as technically what you are already doing by not factoring the whole Catholic outlook and way of life into your reading of Catholic doctrine.
 
Grace & Peace!
The error you make in your reading of Church doctrine and its an error many Protestants and new converts make… is that you are reading it through the Protestant lens which starts from a place of our salvation being assured by the act of Baptism.
I don’t believe any such thing, Longing.
Catholicism permeates the Catholics view of everything in life and sees us as on a journey to salvation, cooperating with the Holy Spirit through the grace of baptism.
I, too, believe that sanctification is a process of cooperation, and that we are not guaranteed salvation by virtue of our baptism.
We are not assured of salvation by our redemption and not free to embrace any perspective we like so long as we stop short of the 10 commandments.
This does not at all characterize my beliefs.
When you read the CCC and say if it doesn’t explicitly define something, then it is free to be defined by my own measures… you aren’t factoring that for a Catholic, the purpose of our lives is ordered towards growth in holiness and obedience and humility, from the first thought of the day onwards. Everything we do is permeated by our cooperative efforts towards final reunion with God in heaven.
Be that as it may, the hermeneutic of “favorabilia sunt amplianda, odiosa sunt restrigenda” is a Catholic one. It’s a method of interpreting law (whatever kind of law it may be) that insists, in part, on a very close and restrictive reading of the law when it comes to things prohibited. It is not a matter of a thing being defined “by my own measures,” it is a matter of a binding thing being defined according to its strictest possible sense, otherwise we would risk (in the words of Matthew 23) binding “heavy burdens and grievous to be borne,” on our brothers and sisters while we ourselves “will not move them” to give them relief.
So when you say you don’t like “up to the point” language, I’m seeing that as technically what you are already doing by not factoring the whole Catholic outlook and way of life into your reading of Catholic doctrine.
My objection, Longing, was to the romantic teleology implied in your question, not to the idea that we are on a journey of sanctification.

But be all that as it may, this is a cop out. You’ve not actually responded to what I’ve written to you, nor have you addressed the issues I and others have raised. You’ve simply produced a non sequitur based on your (actually rather erroneous) understanding of what you believe I, as an Anglo-Catholic, but not a Roman Catholic, believe. This is anti-evangelism, Longing, this weird double-bind line of reasoning that says, “you’re wrong for not being able to understand, but you can’t possibly understand unless you already believe like I do.” You can do better, and I encourage you to do so.

Surely “the whole Catholic outlook” is not code for some kind of argument from authority that would say, “Things are just so because I, as someone who considers themselves a faithful Roman Catholic, say they are just so”?

Again, you can do better.

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
 
What does ‘objectively’ mean to you?
I posted my understanding of the relevant section of the catechism in a few spots, and did get to the issue of “objectively disordered”, along with a couple of other issues including the meaning and intent of “relations” and “disinterested friendships”. See the following:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12150815&postcount=18
  • identifies that it is only “nakedly” sexual acts (eg. mutual masturbation, etc.) that the Catechism forbids;
  • opines on what “relations” are referred to in 2357.
  • opines on the meaning of “disinterested friends”. It **probably **means “everyday friends” on the basis that that is sufficient for the purpose at hand, and is always a good choice in light of the risks to chastity that might result otherwise. But I note there is no instruction or prohibition in this regard.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12153363&postcount=102
  • searches for an interpretation of “objectively disordered”. Quotes from Cardinal Ratzinger and from a blogger.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12154098&postcount=122
  • quote from Canadian Bishops noting that the “objective dis order” arises specifically when the inclination is “toward genital activity”.
 
Grace & Peace!

I don’t believe any such thing, Longing.

I, too, believe that sanctification is a process of cooperation, and that we are not guaranteed salvation by virtue of our baptism.

This does not at all characterize my beliefs.

Be that as it may, the hermeneutic of “favorabilia sunt amplianda, odiosa sunt restrigenda” is a Catholic one. It’s a method of interpreting law (whatever kind of law it may be) that insists, in part, on a very close and restrictive reading of the law when it comes to things prohibited. It is not a matter of a thing being defined “by my own measures,” it is a matter of a binding thing being defined according to its strictest possible sense, otherwise we would risk (in the words of Matthew 23) binding “heavy burdens and grievous to be borne,” on our brothers and sisters while we ourselves “will not move them” to give them relief.

My objection, Longing, was to the romantic teleology implied in your question, not to the idea that we are on a journey of sanctification.

But be all that as it may, this is a cop out. You’ve not actually responded to what I’ve written to you, nor have you addressed the issues I and others have raised. You’ve simply produced a non sequitur based on your (actually rather erroneous) understanding of what you believe I, as an Anglo-Catholic, but not a Roman Catholic, believe. This is anti-evangelism, Longing, this weird double-bind line of reasoning that says, “you’re wrong for not being able to understand, but you can’t possibly understand unless you already believe like I do.” You can do better, and I encourage you to do so.

Surely “the whole Catholic outlook” is not code for some kind of argument from authority that would say, “Things are just so because I, as someone who considers themselves a faithful Roman Catholic, say they are just so”?

Again, you can do better.

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
I was responding to your assertion that I had everything wrong. That I’d misread the CCC and I didn’t know Church doctrine in the superior way that you do. I seem to remember that I’ve discussed with you before and been subjected to this same tactic. My gut is telling me not to waste time on addressing myself to you because you already have your opinion set in concrete as truth. I’m sorry but I have to be done with this topic and these threads as it just feels wrong to be entertaining such anti Catholic worldviews as Catholic.
 
I posted my understanding of the relevant section of the catechism in a few spots, and did get to the issue of “objectively disordered”, along with a couple of other issues including the meaning and intent of “relations” and “disinterested friendships”. See the following:

forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12150815&postcount=18
  • identifies that it is only “nakedly” sexual acts (eg. mutual masturbation, etc.) that the Catechism forbids;
  • opines on what “relations” are referred to in 2357.
  • opines on the meaning of “disinterested friends”. It **probably **means “everyday friends” on the basis that that is sufficient for the purpose at hand, and is always a good choice in light of the risks to chastity that might result otherwise. But I note there is no instruction or prohibition in this regard.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12153363&postcount=102
  • searches for an interpretation of “objectively disordered”. Quotes from Cardinal Ratzinger and from a blogger.
forums.catholic-questions.org/showpost.php?p=12154098&postcount=122
  • quote from Canadian Bishops noting that the “objective dis order” arises specifically when the inclination is “toward genital activity”.
As I said in the last post, I’m bowing out of this discussion. The English language has its flaws and ambiguities, but ‘objectively’, ‘disinterested’ and ‘romance’ are words that have pretty clear meaning the way they are used by the Church. I think it is far more honest to live life according to secular values than to try and change the Church teaching to fit with whatever we like.
 
I came to this thread and the other related ones with no position to push or defend. I read the Catechism on the subject and concluded that its issue with homosexuality is the “intrinsically disordered” acts **and **the disorder that seeks to “go there”. The acts are wrong, and it would be wrong to follow an inclination **to “go there”. **

The subject of attraction between people is surely a complex thing with many dimensions. I don’t think acceding to ALL of those dimensions is wrong, and those dimensions that are not in search of the “intrinsically disordered” (even if society typically associates them) are not wrong by any teaching I’ve read. Perhaps some of these dimensions are like companion issues - something typically found alongside the purely sexual orientation (which is the disordered thing).

SMGS presents a challenging idea which is that physical signs of affection are, for her, not following a disorder oriented to achieving the “intrinsically disordered”. Surely they do arise out of her “condition” though? Are they (for her) like a companion issue - or is there a reason to say, no, they cannot be, they are always and exclusively in search of the “intrinsically disordered”. I think this is the question this thread addresses, but there is a risk of a self-fulfilling reasoning. We might be inclined to include that any person-directed emotion/activity arising from “homosexuality” is sexual in nature (echoing kamaduck’s earlier comment), essentially “by definition”. That seems unhelpful and I don’t think is what the Catechism is concerned about.
 
As I said in the last post, I’m bowing out of this discussion. The English language has its flaws and ambiguities, but ‘objectively’, ‘disinterested’ and ‘romance’ are words that have pretty clear meaning the way they are used by the Church. I think it is far more honest to live life according to secular values than to try and change the Church teaching to fit with whatever we like.
I’m sorry you feel that way. I hoped you would respond to the content, rather than look to impugn motives (again).
 
Grace & Peace!
I was responding to your assertion that I had everything wrong.
I said you were confusing things, not that you had “everything” wrong. You wrote “The objectively disordered inclination to sexual attraction to same sex” [sic] and that seemed very confusing to me on a number of levels, but most particularly as the catechism does not speak of an inclination to an attraction.
That I’d misread the CCC and I didn’t know Church doctrine in the superior way that you do.
Even according to your own bishops (as Rau here and Joie elsewhere have shown), it is a mistake to believe that the words “intrinsic” and “objective” in this context are synonyms. They are not. Intrinsic refers to something in itself, objective refers to something according to its goal, end or object.

I never claimed my knowledge was superior, but I would claim that, in this case at least, it is accurate.
I’m sorry but I have to be done with this topic and these threads as it just feels wrong to be entertaining such anti Catholic worldviews as Catholic.
How is an understanding of something anti-Catholic if your own Catholic bishops promote that understanding?

It is clear that you would prefer that the teaching be read more broadly as opposed to more precisely. I cannot say I know exactly why, but I suspect that it has more to do with whatever socio-political values you hold dear and less to do with Catholicism.

I’m sorry we can’t continue this conversation. I wish you all good things.

Under the Mercy,
Mark

All is Grace and Mercy! Deo Gratias!
 
I came to this thread and the other related ones with no position to push or defend. I read the Catechism on the subject and concluded that its issue with homosexuality is the “intrinsically disordered” acts **and **the disorder that seeks to “go there”. The acts are wrong, and it would be wrong to follow an inclination **to “go there”. **

The subject of attraction between people is surely a complex thing with many dimensions. I don’t think acceding to ALL of those dimensions is wrong, and those dimensions that are not in search of the “intrinsically disordered” (even if society typically associates them) are not wrong by any teaching I’ve read. Perhaps some of these dimensions are like companion issues - something typically found alongside the purely sexual orientation (which is the disordered thing).

SMGS presents a challenging idea which is that physical signs of affection are, for her, not following a disorder oriented to achieving the “intrinsically disordered”. Surely they do arise out of her “condition” though? Are they (for her) like a companion issue - or is there a reason to say, no, they cannot be, they are always and exclusively in search of the “intrinsically disordered”. I think this is the question this thread addresses, but there is a risk of a self-fulfilling reasoning. We might be inclined to include that any person-directed emotion/activity arising from “homosexuality” is sexual in nature (echoing kamaduck’s earlier comment), essentially “by definition”. That seems unhelpful and I don’t think is what the Catechism is concerned about.
Like I asked Kamaduck, what is the purpose of the romantic attraction in causing an exclusive focuss on an individual similarly to men and women attracted to each other in a sexual way (as opposed to philial way)? When it is between the sexes as it should be its purpose is not ambiguous at all. it is to bring them together as men and women as people who must complete each other as mating partners. and we all know the purpose of mating. I have yet to see any of you challenge this for heterosexuals. you only challenge it when discussing gay people where the same thing suddenly gets a different ambiguous “could be” unknown purpose somewhere that you cannot quite put your finger on.

even that semys referred to as the orthodox authority on the matter though she’s no theologian is forced to admit that it is eros and designed for male-female. How can you then try to argue that its not disordered in gay people if it is designed for opposite sex attraction?

Saying we must look at the acts themselves absent their meaning from the attraction is not a catholic way of looking at things. never do we consider things in such a narrow single lens unless we are determine to support a conclusion. If a man came to you and told you that FOR HIM French kissing and touching women’s breasts does not cause arousal, that it is the same as a peck on the check and that this is the case for his mother too and that he therefore wants to be able to express his affection to her this way, I bet you would not look for a sentence explicitly excluding that in the catechism and then tell him, yeah! it seems you can do that because the catechism does not address it!! If a married woman said that in her marriage, for both her and her husband, such things are not part of how they express their exclusive marital affection or commitment and that they would like to be able to do them with friends because this is true FOR them, you will similarly find nothing in the catechism to say they could not. the catechism refers to sexual acts more directly it does not mean that everything is permissible.

it is a protestant and very impoverished manner of approaching things that expects all things to be explicitly written for them to be true. consider the church had never said that only women could be priests in the many centuries before but the church practiced it nonetheless from the beginning. the church took it forgranted. when you come up with something that is different from how things have been seen or done in the default way you cannot just say I have read the catechism and silence (which I disagree with you in your interpretation) is proof that its ok and you want to do this without first seeking guidance from church authority that is a poor attitude of supposedly wanting to live the faith and is exactly how each heresy has started in the last 2000 years. we know that we are not to pervert things from their natural end and the question is whether pursuing romantic relationships without the least potential of a marriage is in fact using that attraction for the purpose it is designed for.
 
Like I asked Kamaduck, what is the purpose of the romantic attraction in causing an exclusive focuss on an individual similarly to men and women attracted to each other in a sexual way (as opposed to philial way)? When it is between the sexes as it should be its purpose is not ambiguous at all. it is to bring them together as men and women as people who must complete each other as mating partners. and we all know the purpose of mating. I have yet to see any of you challenge this for heterosexuals. you only challenge it when discussing gay people where the same thing suddenly gets a different ambiguous “could be” unknown purpose somewhere that you cannot quite put your finger on.

even that semys referred to as the orthodox authority on the matter though she’s no theologian is forced to admit that it is eros and designed for male-female. How can you then try to argue that its not disordered in gay people if it is designed for opposite sex attraction?

Saying we must look at the acts themselves absent their meaning from the attraction is not a catholic way of looking at things. never do we consider things in such a narrow single lens unless we are determine to support a conclusion. If a man came to you and told you that FOR HIM French kissing and touching women’s breasts does not cause arousal, that it is the same as a peck on the check and that this is the case for his mother too and that he therefore wants to be able to express his affection to her this way, I bet you would not look for a sentence explicitly excluding that in the catechism and then tell him, yeah! it seems you can do that because the catechism does not address it!! If a married woman said that in her marriage, for both her and her husband, such things are not part of how they express their exclusive marital affection or commitment and that they would like to be able to do them with friends because this is true FOR them, you will similarly find nothing in the catechism to say they could not. the catechism refers to sexual acts more directly it does not mean that everything is permissible.

it is a protestant and very impoverished manner of approaching things that expects all things to be explicitly written for them to be true. consider the church had never said that only women could be priests in the many centuries before but the church practiced it nonetheless from the beginning. the church took it forgranted. when you come up with something that is different from how things have been seen or done in the default way you cannot just say I have read the catechism and silence (which I disagree with you in your interpretation) is proof that its ok and you want to do this without first seeking guidance from church authority that is a poor attitude of supposedly wanting to live the faith and is exactly how each heresy has started in the last 2000 years. we know that we are not to pervert things from their natural end and the question is whether pursuing romantic relationships without the least potential of a marriage is in fact using that attraction for the purpose it is designed for.
I’m not trying to prove anything. I’ve not claimed to have proven anything. I’m trying to understand specific church teaching. I think it means what I have said. I accept you see it differently. I read the catechism, and I read and referenced documents from Cardinal Ratzinger and from the Canadian and British Bishops in the process. I looked at the matter dispassionately; I have no personal stake in it.

I have not endorsed SMGS in the physicality matter. I think I’ve explicitly said a few times that I don’t know if she is right. I said once that it seems in-advisable. I said I couldn’t find teaching to the contrary.
 
I’m not trying to prove anything. I’ve not claimed to have proven anything. I’m trying to understand specific church teaching. I think it means what I have said. I accept you see it differently. I read the catechism, and I read and referenced documents from Cardinal Ratzinger and from the Canadian and British Bishops in the process. I looked at the matter dispassionately; I have no personal stake in it.

I have not endorsed SMGS in the physicality matter. I think I’ve explicitly said a few times that I don’t know if she is right. I said once that it seems in-advisable. I said I couldn’t find teaching to the contrary.
Here is the thing: you looked at it from the angle of lust and could not find in your interpretation, (again not in full agreement with it) a teaching specifically ruling it out. My issue with you (and Kamaduck) is why we are focusing only on whether certain acts are lustful in themselves. Perhaps there are other ways of looking at things? For example, in each of the answers given at CAF linked by bookcat, you will notice that none of the answers went to whether or not they are specific violations of lust. they simply defined the purpose of dating and concluded it could not be served by couples who can in no way pursue that purpose. this is why I think it is narrow to just focus on the acts in question. that’s not the only way we find truth. are there other ways of answering the question besides the 6th commandment?
 
Here is the thing: you looked at it from the angle of lust and could not find in your interpretation, (again not in full agreement with it) a teaching specifically ruling it out. My issue with you (and Kamaduck) is why we are focusing only on whether certain acts are lustful in themselves. Perhaps there are other ways of looking at things? For example, in each of the answers given at CAF linked by bookcat, you will notice that none of the answers went to whether or not they are specific violations of lust. they simply defined the purpose of dating and concluded it could not be served by couples who can in no way pursue that purpose. this is why I think it is narrow to just focus on the acts in question. that’s not the only way we find truth. are there other ways of answering the question besides the 6th commandment?
Did you find the Catholic Answers answer persuasive? Should the thread have ended at the moment that was presented? It included no reasoning or references to authoritative sources. We were trying to reach a conclusion that we could base on teaching - the Catholic Answers answer didn’t help with that.

BTW, it is not so much that we didn’t find a specific teaching ruling out the subject behaviour, it is more that the teaching we (or, “some of us”, if you read it differently) found in the Catechism (and supported by the various Bishop’s statements) seemed to be fairly specific in its criteria for what was objectively, and separately, intrinsically, disordered. What we couldn’t decide was whether certain behaviours necessarily fall foul of those criteria (in particular, the objectively disordered) or if there is another teaching that forbids them.

That multiple properly intentioned people can’t come to a clear understanding on the subject matter seems itself instructive! I concede not everyone takes the same lesson, however!
 
If they are inclined to regard each other as lovers… even chaste lovers (…)
If chaste lovers are immoral, then I’m afraid morality entered into the Catholic Church in the 19th century :rolleyes:

On the contrary, it is a very Catholic concept, as evidenced in literature, history, even hagiographies if I remember correctly. I really did not know Puritanism had infiltrated the Church to the extent that is evident after these threads. It honestly surprises me, as a non-American.
 
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