You have your answer.
Avoid it in the future.
Talk to your confessor about what went on so you can properly confess and do pennence… assuming a sin.
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Is sleeping with someone of the opposite sex a sin?
- Thread starter GospelOfMatthew
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Avoid it in the future.
Talk to your confessor about what went on so you can properly confess and do pennence… assuming a sin.
GospelOfMatthew
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If I confess that I led her to sin and thus scandal, I am forgiven. But let’s say she then does a sexual sin with herself while thinking of this experience, am I at fault for this also because I was part of this experience which is causing her to sin? I don’t know if that made any sense…
??This literal sleeping included sexual acts but not sex
If I understand correctly, the “problem” is not that literally sleeping with someone (I presume your girlfriend) without doing “nothing” sexual, but sexual acts which is not the normal intercourse.
If it is, you already know for sure, because you are a devout man, you have cross chastity boundiaries. If you have doubt and want all people confirm, yes, you have cross the red line.
just repent, try to stop the relationship or this part of relationship, and when you would feel remorse, go to confession.
Good luck, stay strong. You can do better and resume chastity.
GospelOfMatthew
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Nope we are just very close friends which is very sad. I’m sorry I did anything and I’m sorry I don’t feel sorrierI presume your girlfriend
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Fauken
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No, it’s not sinful on your part. It doesn’t matter if she was doing that with a real or fake moment. Her mind is her own. You should try though to not give her any actual memories though to think of.But let’s say she then does a sexual sin with herself while thinking of this experience, am I at fault for this also because I was part of this experience which is causing her to sin?
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If she does something with herself when you are not present, it is not your responsability, but her. Yet, It is good that you cares about her sins, and felt sorry to led her to it. But it is not your sins.If I confess that I led her to sin and thus scandal, I am forgiven. But let’s say she then does a sexual sin with herself while thinking of this experience, am I at fault for this also because I was part of this experience which is causing her to sin? I don’t know if that made any sense…
Just sin no more with her, or go to an near occasion of sin.
I am very sad for you… The positive thing, is that if you are just friends, and have no sexual attraction to each other, breaking and do not do anymore will be much more easier! (unless you fall in love, of course)Nope we are just very close friends which is very sad. I’m sorry I did anything and I’m sorry I don’t feel sorrier
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PennyinCanada
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Why not be the good example instead of the one that says ‘how close can I get to the edge without falling off?’
Loving a person means that you are not going to put them into compromising situations that become difficult to navigate.
You can say, ‘You know how I’m going to be faithful to my wife? I am going to show you how I’m going to do that today.’ She could be thinking of what happens 5 years down the road, is his eye going to wander. Show her you are a faithful man, by showing yourself to be chaste. No regrets in doing it God’s way. Firm up your resolve to walk God’s way in the time of dating. This is how you build your resolve to do good, and show God that you mean it. This is the rock you can stand on.
Loving a person means that you are not going to put them into compromising situations that become difficult to navigate.
You can say, ‘You know how I’m going to be faithful to my wife? I am going to show you how I’m going to do that today.’ She could be thinking of what happens 5 years down the road, is his eye going to wander. Show her you are a faithful man, by showing yourself to be chaste. No regrets in doing it God’s way. Firm up your resolve to walk God’s way in the time of dating. This is how you build your resolve to do good, and show God that you mean it. This is the rock you can stand on.
GospelOfMatthew
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That’s the thing, we both enjoyed it and we are both strongly attracted to each other physically and sexually. She said I’m the perfect guy she wants (I am by no means perfect clearly) but she has too many stressors with school and work and travel to tie herself down right nowand have no sexual attraction to each other,
Much more complicated, because it is the way a significant numbers of relationships or even marriages starts. (including mine).
Yet, if we are honest, we know putting sex before relationship and feelings is very risky! You are bound to a person you don’t really know if you have compatibility in each topics of life that matters -religion, marriage, child rearing, family, , values and so much more.
I can only advise to stop the physical relationship, to take some distance, and see if you can be compatible for a marriage or not before pursuing any relationship. Otherwise you can be both trapped in unhappy realtionship or bad marriage.
If she is not ready for areltaionship now, it is not a good sign.
Being sorry can take some time. You have to realized and integrated the sin. Now, you are just excited about what you done and feel, I guess.
(I have noticed you have been less active on this forum the last weeks…)
Yet, if we are honest, we know putting sex before relationship and feelings is very risky! You are bound to a person you don’t really know if you have compatibility in each topics of life that matters -religion, marriage, child rearing, family, , values and so much more.
I can only advise to stop the physical relationship, to take some distance, and see if you can be compatible for a marriage or not before pursuing any relationship. Otherwise you can be both trapped in unhappy realtionship or bad marriage.
If she is not ready for areltaionship now, it is not a good sign.
Being sorry can take some time. You have to realized and integrated the sin. Now, you are just excited about what you done and feel, I guess.
(I have noticed you have been less active on this forum the last weeks…)
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GospelOfMatthew
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To be fair we have known each other for 6 months. Not trying to justify at all, just saying it’s not like a random hookup. We are good friends
Ok, I understand.
You have to decide if you want to be girlfriend/boyfriend or just friends. No need to be too quick. You can take distance and time.
Sometimes we said"just friends", because transition to relationship is not easy to make or agree that we are here.
Friends don’t sleep together, sex include or not.
You have to decide if you want to be girlfriend/boyfriend or just friends. No need to be too quick. You can take distance and time.
Sometimes we said"just friends", because transition to relationship is not easy to make or agree that we are here.
Friends don’t sleep together, sex include or not.
GospelOfMatthew
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That’s why I feel like we are this weird Friends with Benefits thing that has a chance to grow into a relationship
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PatK63
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Matt,
You know what you are doing is sinful. You are tempting yourself and your girl friend. Both of you are risking your salvation. All that said your are not responsible for her decisions. However don’t you want to be a guy that leads others away from sin?
It is the duty of every man to uphold the dignity of every woman. St. JPII.
You know what you are doing is sinful. You are tempting yourself and your girl friend. Both of you are risking your salvation. All that said your are not responsible for her decisions. However don’t you want to be a guy that leads others away from sin?
It is the duty of every man to uphold the dignity of every woman. St. JPII.
grow in a relationship only if it would be a good thing, an only thing to make the Kingdom grow.
if she is Catholic and holds similar beliefs on life’s perspective, itwould be a good point. but you both need to be remorsefull and sin no more (not an evidence right know, I guess) otherwise you are at risk to loose some of your soul…or moove out of your faith
if she is Catholic and holds similar beliefs on life’s perspective, itwould be a good point. but you both need to be remorsefull and sin no more (not an evidence right know, I guess) otherwise you are at risk to loose some of your soul…or moove out of your faith
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VanitasVanitatum
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I don’t even know what’s going on.
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