Kissing on the lips during the sign of peace

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HoneyBea

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I kiss my husband on the lips at mass during the offering of the sign of peace. Is this wrong to do? I never thought of it as wrong, because I don’t consider kissing my husband overly PDA and because Ive kissed and hugged all my family during the sign of the peace ever since I was a little girl. This is all I know. My parents hugged and kissed me and all my brothers etc and now I do the same with my husband, except I kiss him on the lips. Ive never paid attention around me to see if others do it too. Maybe this is a cultural thing? I really don’t know, this is the first time I’ve ever contemplated this.
 
I recall at least well founded response that such would not be appropriate sign of peace at Mass (I thus do not do so).
 
Thank you for your response! : )

So, is this something official? I don’t want to be disobedient.
 
The Sign of Peace is an act among Christians as Christians not a sign of marital or family affection.
 
From Catholic Answers staff Apologist (and she makes use of one document from the Church within):

“As for the sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by conferences of bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. It is, however, appropriate that each person offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner”(GIRM 82).

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=300671&highlight=kiss+of+peace

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=303622&highlight=sign+peace+married
 
Because the sign of peace is a symbolic gesture, and not a display of affection for the other person, it should be offered the same way to everyone. I shake hands with my husband and my kids (if we ever happen to be at Mass together) at that point, just as I do with anyone else.
 
Oh ok good! So I can use my own judgement.
It so natural for us. We are Hispanic and a very affectionate family and I’m pretty sure my parents have been doing the same thing for years before we were even born.
I was worried for a minute and wondering why my parents had led me wrong.
 
I seem to recall when the practice was first introduced, the unofficial instructions were to greet those you don’t know around you. I never did understand why people choose to greet the ones they do know first. But that’s me.
 
Bookcat said:
From Catholic Answers staff Apologist (and she makes use of one document from the Church within):

“As for the sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by conferences of bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. It is, however, appropriate that each person offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner”(GIRM 82).

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=300671&highlight=kiss+of+peace

forums.catholic-questions.org/showthread.php?t=303622&highlight=sign+peace+married
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Thanks for the link! In my cultural we kiss and hug everyone. That explains it. Thank you.
 
HoneyBea said:
I kiss my husband on the lips at mass during the offering of the sign of peace. Is this wrong to do? I never thought of it as wrong, because I don’t consider kissing my husband overly PDA and because Ive kissed and hugged all my family during the sign of the peace ever since I was a little girl. This is all I know. My parents hugged and kissed me and all my brothers etc and now I do the same with my husband, except I kiss him on the lips. Ive never paid attention around me to see if others do it too. Maybe this is a cultural thing? I really don’t know, this is the first time I’ve ever contemplated this.
Click to expand...
The classic sign of peace in the old High Mass is a kiss on each cheek.

That’s how I exchange the sign of peace with my wife.

God Bless
 
HoneyBea said:
…
Click to expand...
From the Church:

"As for the sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by conferences of bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. It is, however, appropriate that each person offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner (GIRM 82).
 
bilop said:
The classic sign of peace in the old High Mass is a kiss on each cheek.

That’s how I exchange the sign of peace with my wife.

God Bless
Click to expand...
That’s exactly how I was taught too. My parents only know latin High mass and so did I growing up.

The kissing on the lips is new, because well I’ve only been married 5 years but it seemed natural.
 
HoneyBea said:
I kiss my husband on the lips at mass during the offering of the sign of peace. Is this wrong to do? I never thought of it as wrong, because I don’t consider kissing my husband overly PDA and because Ive kissed and hugged all my family during the sign of the peace ever since I was a little girl. This is all I know. My parents hugged and kissed me and all my brothers etc and now I do the same with my husband, except I kiss him on the lips. Ive never paid attention around me to see if others do it too. Maybe this is a cultural thing? I really don’t know, this is the first time I’ve ever contemplated this.
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Honey Bea, you will get lots of answers in a public forum. Just like you would get lots of answers on what you should wear to Mass if you asked that question.

You may want to ask your priest if you are concerned.

I always give my husband a kiss and the kids as well. Like you, I kiss my husband on the lips.

As I understand, at one time this was known as the Kiss of Peace during Mass.

May you have peace and not be disturbed if lots of people tell you that you should not kiss your husband during the Sign of Peace.
 
Bookcat said:
From the Church:

"As for the sign of peace to be given, the manner is to be established by conferences of bishops in accordance with the culture and customs of the peoples. It is, however, appropriate that each person offer the sign of peace only to those who are nearest and in a sober manner (GIRM 82).
Click to expand...
Well, kissing on the lips isn’t exactly making out, so I think it is perfectly acceptable. We call it the sign of peace, but it is traditionally referred to as a kiss of peace. It is symbolic and ritualistic and how it is carried out varies from culture to culture.
 
Just keep in mind that it’s a liturgical action, not a family reunion! And also that the sign of peace ought to be offered to everyone in the same manner.
 
RoseMary131 said:
Honey Bea, you will get lots of answers in a public forum. Just like you would get lots of answers on what you should wear to Mass if you asked that question.

You may want to ask your priest if you are concerned.

I always give my husband a kiss and the kids as well. Like you, I kiss my husband on the lips.

As I understand, at one time this was known as the Kiss of Peace during Mass.

May you have peace and not be disturbed if lots of people tell you that you should not kiss your husband during the Sign of Peace.
Click to expand...
Thank you : )

I’ve made up my mind I’m keeping my customs. I wanted to know if there was anything official forbidding it, because I wanted to be obedient, but a kiss can mean many different things including a sign of peace : )
 
babochka said:
Well, kissing on the lips isn’t exactly making out, so I think it is perfectly acceptable. We call it the sign of peace, but it is traditionally referred to as a kiss of peace. It is symbolic and ritualistic and how it is carried out varies from culture to culture.
Click to expand...
The kiss of peace is not a kiss of husband and wife. It is not a sign of marital affection.
 
JimG said:
Just keep in mind that it’s a liturgical action, not a family reunion! And also that the sign of peace ought to be offered to everyone in the same manner.
Click to expand...
I can do that not a problem : )
 
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