Lesbian teacher at preschool we love

[KendraDZ1902]

The problem is that it’s very difficult to determine if teacher is behaving appropriately unless mom is in class as an aide or something. We can’t rely on a preschooler to determine or recall everything a teacher says.

If kids talk to their parents as much as they do their teachers, parents will know all about what that teacher does.
I know all about families because my kiddos talked to me.

 

[nodito]

I feel sorry for the teacher as this open controversy is bound to get back some way or another and possibly cost her the job she has. Everyone is speculating as to what harm or influence the teacher will have on a four year old. We don’t know, but we make judgments. I said it before. What Pope Francis said, “Who am I to judge.” If Christ were among us today how would He judge? I do not condone SSM, but I hasitate to crucify.

Mary, there is no open controversy because I haven’t yet said anything to anyone. But, moreover, how is it crucifying a teacher to withdraw a child from a program when the parent has concerns over what the child will be taught?

I agree that we ought not unfairly discriminate, but I also believe that parents have the obligation to decide whether their children are being educated in a good and moral environment.

If Christ were among us today how would He judge?

I think he would say to the woman in question (as he does to all of us), “Go and sin no more.”

 

[nodito]

You don’t know what goes on in any one of these teachers homes. You don’t know what kind of sins are being committed.

I agree. I only know what they choose to make public; namely, that this woman is presenting herself as being married to another woman. Everyone sins, but most sins are not public, manifest, and proclaimed without shame.

 

[nodito]

Truly, what do you think the risk is here? Unless she comes up with a lesson plan around same-sex families (highly doubtful), it’s unlikely this lady’s sexual preference is going to be part of the preschool program. As far as hearing about the whole “woman and wife” or “two mommies” thing, well, he will be seeing this at some point when he’s still quite young, and you will have to provide a very simple age-appropriate explanation as you do to other sticky adult situations.

I guess I see three main risks:

1. Because it’s not a traditional preschool program and there isn’t a designated classroom, the parents and teachers and families have a lot more informal interactions with one another. Twice a year the school hosts a family camp-out where we all pitch tents in the woods and and share a potluck dinner. So I can easily envision situations in which this woman’s “wife” will be present or introduced to the children.
2. The teachers have some discretion over choosing which stories are read, and I’m uncomfortable that she might choose to include books that feature parents in immoral living situations and presenting them as normal.
3. Supposing that the woman doesn’t have an agenda and doesn’t set out to indoctrinate the children, I really can’t control what offhanded comments she makes to the kids. She has a new baby and I imagine she will bring her in to the forest as well (the farm is a family-friendly place and one of the current teachers regularly does this). I can easily see a child asking about the baby’s dad, only to be corrected that she actually has two mommies. It normalizes a deviancy which in my thinking should not be normalized.

The more I type, the more I feel like I’m talking myself out of re-enrolling him. It makes me sad. My daughter is a couple years younger and I would have loved to send her and all our kids there. Pray for me as I make this decision this weekend, and please pray for the program and the adults and children involved.

 

[MaryT777]

I guess I see three main risks:

The more I type, the more I feel like I’m talking myself out of re-enrolling him. It makes me sad. My daughter is a couple years younger and I would have loved to send her and all our kids there. Pray for me as I make this decision this weekend, and please pray for the program and the adults and children involved.

Prayers for your intentions said. I’m sure it is a difficult decision.

God bless,
Mary.

 

[phil_at_dayboro]

Hey, Phil,

I don’t think it’s about the people themselves (I have a niece that says she is a lesbian) but more about finding the best way to teach our children our Christian values.

It’s definitely a conundrum because you have such lovable people in relationships that God and conservative churches teach against. We think that young children don’t understand but while they don’t verbalize it they are learning what they see. The more we become involved with the lifestyle itself the more it becomes a norm among us.

I have a 4 year old nephew who listens, watches, and formulates his idea about something and then all of a sudden he verbalizes what he’s been seeing and learning. It’s critical that we teach them that the homosexual lifestyle is not a Christian way of life and yet still let them know that they can love the individuals involved in it.

Thanks for your comment and observation - I think it was an important point to bring up in the conversation.

God bless!!

Rita

  Thanks for that , and I agree with you,,

I just wished to state my opinion based on my previous experience,
I had spent several years in the home improvment industry,
Selling and fitting things like Awnings , blinds and Shower screen,
As you can imagine , I entered many many homes and saw many things,

 

[signit]

Mary, there is no open controversy because I haven’t yet said anything to anyone. But, moreover, how is it crucifying a teacher to withdraw a child from a program when the parent has concerns over what the child will be taught?

Possibly, if someone said, “I’m taking my child out of the program because the teacher is a lesbian,” and especially if a lot of parents did it, the teacher could be fired, depending on the employment laws in that state.

 

[nodito]

Possibly, if someone said, “I’m taking my child out of the program because the teacher is a lesbian,” and especially if a lot of parents did it, the teacher could be fired, depending on the employment laws in that state.

My state prohibits discrimination based on sexual orientation or gender identity. The woman cannot be fired for this reason. (Though I highly doubt it would even be considered; we’re a liberal state and I’m sure I’m the one who is going to be percived as a bigot for withdrawing my son).

But in any event, should I choose to withdraw him, it won’t be because the woman is a lesbian, but rather because I’m worried that the values she might teach my son would conflict with my own.

 

[kozlosap]

By the time these pre-schoolers are eighteen, a vast majority will accept LGBTQ individuals just as they accept straight individuals - for who they are as a whole person, not just based on their sexual orientation. Today, in 2015, the majority of adult Catholics support marriage equality, so it follows that in fifteen years those numbers will be even more graphic. Even if you homeschool your child for twelve years, the minute they enter college or the work force they will begin meeting gay people and will form their own opinions and decide what is moral and what is not.

 

[Sarcelle]

By the time these pre-schoolers are eighteen, a vast majority will accept LGBTQ individuals just as they accept straight individuals - for who they are as a whole person, not just based on their sexual orientation. Today, in 2015, the majority of adult Catholics support marriage equality, so it follows that in fifteen years those numbers will be even more graphic. Even if you homeschool your child for twelve years, the minute they enter college or the work force they will begin meeting gay people and will form their own opinions and decide what is moral and what is not.

An eighteen year old that is well grounded in the faith thanks to their parents will be able to deal with meeting other people who do not necessarily share their values, much better than a four year old. This not about insulating children forever.

I do not think any right thinking parent would think that possible.

 

[lifeisbeautiful]

While all that outdoor time sounds nice, I’d be concerned and unlikely to re-enroll my child…

First off, I’d be concerned with high staff turnover, as you say both his teachers are leaving the program. High staff turnover often points to problems, and it was a huge problem at my oldest child’s daycare. Even if their reasons for leaving don’t relate to something going on in the program, when good people leave, things change. You loved the pre-school* this *year, but it won’t be the same next year since his teachers are leaving.

Next, he’s four now, so he’ll be five by the end of the next school year. I’d expect that he will remember some things from his preschool years. I have memories of people and things from the preschool I attended when I was four. If you entrust the care of your child to this school, his memories may include things this teacher says or does. She may or may not be trying to actively promote an agenda, but whn she simply shares information such as what she did over the weekend, your child will hear of her lifestyle choices. It’s also fairly normal for moms to talk about their children and for pre-school children to be interested in babies. Your son may pick up on the fact that his “teacher’s baby doesn’t have–or need-- a father.” But that’s not true because her child does have a father, somewhere, (because that’s the way biology and human reproduction works.) Somewhere out there is her child’s biological father.

That gets to my last point: I’d be concerned about what this teacher lifestyle could relay to your young *son *about the role she thinks *adult males *have in society.

I think what this all comes down to is what is more important? Your child’s early moral development or playing outdoors for preschool?

There are no guarantees that this teacher’s “married” status isn’t going to come up. In fact, chances are pretty good that it will especially considering they brought it up immediately when introducing her.

Don’t take any chances with your child. My kids were all raised in the faith and as soon as they were exposed to public school ideals, the older two rejected everything I taught them, including our beliefs regarding homosexuality. They bought the lie as soon as it was offered to them. They were TEENS when that happened, what do you think a preschooler is going to do if exposed to that lie?

Perhaps a better option would be to enroll your child in a Catholic preschool program and in boy/girl scouts as they’re old enough and make an effort to go out as a family for hikes in the woods or camping trips.

I agree with these.

Also, I did see some examples of teachers that were gay where students never found out, but please remember, things have changed a lot in the last years. Unless the story is about a teacher in the last 2-3 years, I think it may not be relevant to the situation. I think the fact that it was already publicly announced at school can let you know that it is something that will most probably come up. Desensitization is a big deal, and having kids around people conveying the message that disordered relationships are natural and normal can have very negative effects in children’s perceptions of what is healthy and normal. This is a big battle, a very difficult one I feel. To me it is easier to explain why, for example, abortion is wrong (my kids are horrified at the thought), than to explain the how disordered homosexuality is due to natural law. I have friends and family that are very much pro-life, but simply cannot understand why “any two people can’t love each other”. I think this is something we have to be very careful with from day one, because it is harmful to our kids and society at large.

 

[EasterJoy]

I have done work for male & female gay people, the Genuine ones are extremly careing ,
It’s the Hetrosexual ones that I worry about, they come in all sorts from careing to nasty

It is bigoted thinking that leads one to say that there is any reason at all to preconceive an expectation that someone will be more or less caring or nasty than the rest of the population based on their gender or their sexual orientation. (Not that I think this was your intention at all.)

Really, the sole question here is whether or not this person presents a particular danger with regards to teaching the children wrong-headed morality, and not what the teacher’s orientation is. It is a fair point to make, too. If a lesbian never talks about her life outside the classroom, what harm does her orientation do? On the other hand, doesn’t the heterosexual parent of six children who insists on reading “Heather Has Two Mommies” to the kids do real harm that is not done by the person only mentions in passing that she has a woman living with her at her house? This is far less about what the teacher does outside the classroom than it is about what the teacher actually teaches.

What if the teacher is wonderful? It is almost worse to have a person teach your children falsehoods when the person is extremely likable. That makes the falsehoods far harder to reject.

 

[EasterJoy]

By the time these pre-schoolers are eighteen, a vast majority will accept LGBTQ individuals just as they accept straight individuals - for who they are as a whole person, not just based on their sexual orientation. Today, in 2015, the majority of adult Catholics support marriage equality, so it follows that in fifteen years those numbers will be even more graphic. Even if you homeschool your child for twelve years, the minute they enter college or the work force they will begin meeting gay people and will form their own opinions and decide what is moral and what is not.

Of course they will meet gay people. Who wants to shun the homosexuals and strand them all an island? They have as much dignity as anyone else and as much worth in the eyes of Heaven as anyone else.

Marriage “equality,” however, is a concept based on a lie, just as communism is based on a lie and atheism is based on a lie. People with same-sex attraction are being fed a pack of lies in our times, just as surely as everyone else is. Well-meant lies, honestly-believed lies, no doubt–I do not mean that everyone who believes in marriage “equality” is trying to deceive–but lies in that these philosophies are based on patent untruths that come straight from the Father of Lies. Catholic parents are bound to teach their children the truth, including the truth that following Christ and the teachings of Christ might earn them the hatred of the World.

I would not, however, jump to the conclusion that the pendulums of public opinion never swing, but always progress onward and onward in the same direction. History does not teach that, particularly when the prevailing opinion is well-meaning but 100% wrong.