Let's Show Runaway Bride a Little Forgiveness

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I really hope that the actions of “runaway bride” will not keep police from following through on all other cases that could be true kidnappings. Can’t imagine that this case, and there have been other “false” kidnappings, will keep police from doing their duty.

We have taken the “I forgive” too far. In the first place, she hasn’t asked us to forgive her. She hasn’t hurt any of us, just gave us something to watch on TV other than the debate over national debt and the war in Iraq. I hope she has asked those who are close to her and love her to forgive her, as well as those who spent time and money searching for her. Sounds like a very well planned, selfish act. Too much money and social status in that family???

We are not to judge anyone’s SOUL!! We must leave that to God. However, we must look at actions. If I were her mother, I would think a long time before I invested any money in another wedding party any time soon!!

Love and Peace
 
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WhiteDove:
You know, I don’t think it’s our place to ‘forgive her’. Who are we? We aren’t her parents, we aren’t her fiancee, we aren’t her bridesmaids, and we certainly aren’t God.

She is a woman who behaved foolishly, embarrassed everyone she knows, humiliated herself before the world, and cost the taxpayers a few bucks. She didn’t kill anyone, she didn’t maim anyone for life, she didn’t destroy any property. She didn’t start a war, drown her children or kill her unborn child.

She’s just someone who made the news. So, let’s put this in perspective! :cool:
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Well said! WE are not the ones who need to forgive her.

Karen Anne
 
I was so relieved to find out that she was alive. After Mark Peterson and the guy in Utah(?) who killed his wife after she found out that he wasn’t going to medical school, I wasn’t sure that I was ready to hear about another murdering abusive husband/husband to be. I’m not so sure that she CAN be charged with a crime, but if it turns out that she, in fact, did commit a crime, then she needs to be charged. There was a college student who faked her own kidnapping and was charged. I think there needs to be some consistency. Not so sure she should do jail time, though.
 
ALthough I agree that we are not the ones who should/should not forgive her, lets consider what it is she did:

She bought a bus ticket on or about the 19th of April - about a week before she ran off. The day she ran off - she lied to her fiancee about going running. After a few days she called 9-1-1 and lied about being abducted.

What about the fiancee? he felt compelled to take a private lie detector tst just to show he wan’t involved, and was negotiating with the FBI to take their lie detector test. WHen the freaking FBI asks you to take a polygraph - that isn’t something you would hope for.

In light of the two cases (Scott Peterson and the crazy dude) of husbands murdering thier wives, and the missing childrens cases, she absolutely acted in an extremely irresponsible manner. I do not know about criminal charges, how about making her pay the money the tax payer revenue was wasted in the man hours it took to look for her - and maybe they should give her the bill for the non wedding that took place.

I’m sorry if I sound mean, but I am getting married soon, and I really felt for the fiancee. Not to mention the gut renching interview with her father (or was it step-father).

However - a previous poster is probably right, it is not our place to forgive or pass judgement. I just wanted to vent.
 
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WhiteDove:
You know, I don’t think it’s our place to ‘forgive her’. Who are we? We aren’t her parents, we aren’t her fiancee, we aren’t her bridesmaids, and we certainly aren’t God.

She is a woman who behaved foolishly, embarrassed everyone she knows, humiliated herself before the world, and cost the taxpayers a few bucks. She didn’t kill anyone, she didn’t maim anyone for life, she didn’t destroy any property. She didn’t start a war, drown her children or kill her unborn child.

She’s just someone who made the news. So, let’s put this in perspective! :cool:
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Good point. Any of us not directly involved with her are in no position to offer forgiveness. We can judge her acts, though, and these were extremely selfish.
 
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gnjsdad:
Good point. Any of us not directly involved with her are in no position to offer forgiveness. We can judge her acts, though, and these were extremely selfish.
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:eek: I can’t believe we agree 😃
 
I would have rather had her run away from the wedding than end up divorced later because she just couldn’t dissapoint the $ and people.
 
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Siena:
I would have rather had her run away from the wedding than end up divorced later because she just couldn’t dissapoint the $ and people.
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The problem is by running away the way she did - she not only placed her fiancee in a most unfortunate position of defending himself - and horribly upset her family - but she broke the law by fabricating the abduction story.

If she had issues with the wedding and/or fiancee - why did she not bring them up a week before she ran off - the same time she bought her bus ticket?
 
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rastell:
Most of you have read of the missing-person search for Jennifer Wilbanks who ran away from home because of stress over her upcoming wedding. An article on CNN (cnn.com/2005/US/04/30/wilbanks.found/index.html) says in part:

"Police in New Mexico and Georgia said no criminal charges against Wilbanks were pending, but a prosecutor in Gwinnett County, Georgia, said it was too soon to make that decision.

"District Attorney Danny Porter said he first wants to review statements Wilbanks made to police and the FBI.

***"Wilbanks and Mason were set to be married Saturday. The wedding was to have some 600 invited guests. ***

"‘Originally, it appeared she had been kidnapped, but after talking to the FBI, it turns out that Miss Wilbanks basically felt the pressure of this large wedding and could not handle it,’ Duluth Police Chief Randy Belcher said."

I urge people reading this to email or call District Attorney Danny Porter and ask that he not pursue this matter. Let’s show the woman a little forgiveness, not more stress!

**District Attorney’s Contact Information: **
Danny Porter
(770) 822-8400
Danny.Porter@gwinnettcounty.com
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Anyone who makes a FALSE criminal complaint regardless of what it may be, if they make up something about a person or an event: SHOULD FACE CRIMINAL CHARGES.
 
Bruised Reed:
I also remember having the thought that some people were going to going to be really critical of her and that I wasn’t going to be one of them. I have no idea what she was struggling with that she made the decisions she did. She just seems scared of so many things.
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The following AP article states:

"'We don’t have to charge everybody,'said Albuquerque police spokeswoman Trish Ahrensfield. ‘We have discretion. We are human beings. We have feelings and we are professional at the same time.’ By all accounts, authorities in Albuquerque befriended the woman."

(http://apnews.myway.com/article/20050502/D89QNE7G0.html)

BTW, these people probably know her condition at the time well - they were the first to question her.

**I don’t know if the people at the Albuquerque police are Christian, but they are certainly showing “Christian charity” **

**God bless them. 🙂 **
 
If your child does something because they are very scared and don’t have the resources (in their mind) to handle it, they run away. When they are little, it is almost funny and we tease them about it. When they are adults we hold them accountable (which they should be) but what should that accountability entail? I think we and our judicial system are too ready to hang someone for things we don’t appove of. I have a difficult time thinking that we need to punish someone who is hurting. What happened to helping these people so that this type of thing isn’t repeated? We shouldn’t judge, we should help and pray for that person. I think a lot of money is wasted locking people up when the resources could be better used to help these people. How does locking someone up help? How does humiliation help? I’m sure this will rile a lot of people up but I have such a problem with how unloving and uncaring we can be when love and care is what Jesus was all about!!
 
Forgiveness and punishment (or justice) or 2 separate things. She can be forgiven but still have to face some punishment for breaking the law. It seems we have lost this concept through our weak catechesis on confession. God always forgives us. But there is damage done that must be remedied. That is why there is penance, suffering, and purgatory.
 
Maybe its me but… this wedding was set to cost over $100,000 with its cast of thousands, i.e., 14 bridesmaids and 14 groomsmen. It defines the phrase “over-the-top”. Shouldn’t we worry about things that matter? Our media-driven society has gone so far 'round the bend with materialism that we are unable to tell the difference.

I am disgusted by the whole thing, from the absolutely inappropriate level of excess to the immature behavior to the media’s groveling to find a story. (I don’t think that Sean Hannity needs to be interviewing any of the parties involved. It demeans him and his shows.)

As for forgiveness of this young lady, I would think that is up to God and her fiance. As for the criminal penalties, the piper has to be paid.
 
Hmmm…we punish someone who is hurt and scared? Someone who felt they had nowhere to turn? Did she make a mistake? Absolutely!!! I’m not excusing that. I also think she needs to repay the money that was spent to look for her. But…and that is a big BUT, I think we need to look at helping her. Punishment is not always the answer. I really think we need to step back and look at the cause and then see if punishment is truly the answer. We are just too quick with the punishment and that really worries me.
 
Should she be forgiven? I believe so. Perhaps after she collects herself, she could redeeem herself by lending a hand or donating money to missing children. What she did was wrong but really not criminal. She needs time and prayers. There are real criminals out there like that “person” who killed little Jessica and others like her that the police need to go after and KEEP IN JAIL!!!:mad:
 
I believe she should be forgiven, but even God calls for penance. She should not just walk away with no punishment.
 
But, but,…why should anonymous readers on a forum be asked to forgive a silly twit who cost the state of Ga. a fortune, shamed Hispanics, insulted her friends and guests and shamed her fiance. What do we have to do with the situation? If I were her fiance I would thank God that her behavior was exposed before the wedding and I’d run away from her as fast as I could.

If he forgives her let it be from a distance so he isn’t hurt again.

Dan L
 
I’m not saying she should walk away without anything. I am saying though that maybe they need to really look at what caused her to do it. Maybe at this point we should just help her and leave the punishment up to God. Do we truly know what goes on in anyone’s mind? I think not. How then do we know best how to punish someone? I hate the word punishment. I think we try to play God here on earth. I also don’t think the punishment or forgiveness should come from us.
 
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Lance:
I believe she should be forgiven, but even God calls for penance. She should not just walk away with no punishment.
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Agreed. Perhaps the $100,000 reward should go to the police force and Jennifer Wilibanks should make a public apology fro causing the grief she caused.

If I were her family, I would have to wonder why she felt she couldn’t come to one of us and let us know how she felt. Whether she was feeling overwhelmed or scared, having doubts, whatever she was feeling.
 
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Faustina:
If I were her family, I would have to wonder why she felt she couldn’t come to one of us and let us know how she felt. Whether she was feeling overwhelmed or scared, having doubts, whatever she was feeling.
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So what was going on in her mind? Do any of us know? Maybe we don’t have a right to know. Maybe she does owe the world an apology and and explanation. Do we really need it? When people hurt…they sometimes do crazy things.
 
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