Ok. So how do you reconcile these two things. The youth of today reading the youcat no nothing of the shaming you are speaking of. So how can one say that the church does not demonize something that is intrinsically evil? If the aim of youcat is to not be confusing because teens can not understand the real catechism then isn’t that about the most opposite result you get from the language used?
Do they?
Admittedly, I’m in my late 20s, so it’s been a little while since I would have been in a youth group, but not
that long. I can tell you that my (conservative, traditional Catholic) mother’s reaction to my discovering my body* and go through puberty were on the one hand physical violence and on the other shame and disgust–think having to wear heavy, loose boys’ clothing to disguise the fact that I was a normal, developing teenage girl. I have a sister almost a decade younger than I; I know for a fact that she was exposed to that line of thinking, too, and I doubt we were the only ones who were. Our culture is simultaneously far too open and far too Puritanical about sex: it’s everywhere, but everywhere that it is it’s seen as “bad” or “naughty” and therefore more fun, when, of course, the opposite is true. Thank goodness for the Church’s balanced view of the subject! However, having a teen be told “yep, this is what that is, yes, that’s wrong, here’s why, if you do it, go to Confession without fear and get it sorted out” is what needs to happen**, not just “it’s all grave matter, you’re in sin” and not “oh, everyone does it, no big deal” on the other.
Now, I do agree that the phrasing used in the youcat is silly at best. The truth with charity is what’s called for in this area–not shaming or ambiguity.
*In an eminently innocent fashion, I might add–I’d seen a mom breastfeeding her baby, so I pretended, at the age of 6 or so, to breastfeed a doll in the course of playing with the doll. My mother saw this, walked over very quickly, slapped me hard, and then when I sobbed out confusedly “but what did I do?”, refused to explain what I had done wrong beyond implying that even touching that area of my body was one of the worst things I could ever do.
**Which is one of the many reasons that once my kids hit the age of reason and with a frequency that will no doubt cause the teens’ eyes to roll thereafter, their dad and I will reiterate that they can ask us at any time to take them to Confession and we’ll take them to the next scheduled Confession time, no questions asked or comments made, period.
