Missing mass due to social anxiety!?

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I’m thinking of just bringing it up the next time I go for confession which will mostly be in the month of August
 
Okay. I agree bringing it up in confession might cause less anxiety then trying to set up an appointment. Anyway the priest may not be able to help with social anxiety as much as a therapist or someone else. He is trained to address the moral or spiritual aspects more
 
Yes but most colleges have counseling services and they can at least help you with your anxiety
 
I’m too chicken to go up to the counsellor and ask for help cause …anxiety
 
Could you email the counsellor and set up a meeting that way?

Please don’t worry about sinning. Just talk to your Priest at the next opportunity you get.

I hope things get better soon.
 
That can be hard. For me the easiest way was to set an appointment through email so I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. Once the appointment was set I felt like I had to go even if I felt anxious. Not sure if you are able to contact the counselor through email. If you could it might even help to give her a brief overview over email of what you struggle with to make the first session less awkward
 
I’ll mostly email her when college begins next month…I’m currently on summer vacay ( I’m from India)
 
My college begins on 15th of June so I’ll email her then …even if I end up chickening our he might come and find me in my class or through a teacher.
 
Great! Hope it helps to meet with him. Social anxiety can become debilitating and can make life a lot harder. Praying for you!
 
Dealing with mental illness or psychological problems is no different, in the Church’s eyes, than having other medical problems. Go if you can, don’t go if you can’t.

A lot of people do not know this… But you can actually fulfill your Sunday Mass obligation from outside the church walls, even, or on a different floor of church than where the Mass is! This is mostly for the benefit of people with small kids, overflow crowds, people feeling ill or faint, bathroom runs, etc. But it even counts for smokers. So yeah, you have a lot of freedom to lurk, leave your seat, and attend Mass however you can.

Loopholes and exceptions are there for good reasons!
 
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My college begins on 15th of June so I’ll email her then …even if I end up chickening our he might come and find me in my class or through a teacher.
Have you considered e-mailing your pastor? He may be able to suggest a place to go to Sunday Mass where the group is small and regular, such as at a Catholic care home. He may suggest you find someone other than your cousin that you can contact to go to Mass with you. Your cousin may have a friend that will help you out.

It may be your pastor won’t “believe in” social anxiety, either–because priests are not trained in every aspect of psychology–but that doesn’t mean he can’t help you to find a way to perform your religious duties that will be the most comfortable for you.

This level of social anxiety has to be affecting other areas of your ability to function. I second the suggestions that you find someone to help you examine your thinking and perhaps find some coping strategies that will help you.

You might also want to find a book or two to read on your own, such as:


The chances are that you will feel more capable of confronting the problem if you get some advice on how to go about it. If that doesn’t work, that’s OK…it is common to need face-to-face support to figure out how to cope with this kind of problem. Be ready to be patient with yourself and to have some ups and downs as you learn to expand your horizons. (As in, when you fail to do what you wanted to do, you can remind yourself: I knew this doesn’t have an easy solution. It is going to take real work on my part and even then I will sometimes have failures and sometimes have successes. I may always be somewhat shy, but that doesn’t mean I won’t work my way to being far more comfortable in around people I don’t know than I am now.)

The truth is, though, that sometimes “painfully shy” people go through a “butterfly” process in which they go from being very shy to being very approachable people that even shy people can relate to. I know someone like that: no one ever guesses that he was once very shy. Other very shy people never become fond of social situations with strangers, but do learn to cope enough to go out and where they need to go and and do well enough to be satisfied with their situation. You never know. What you do know now, however, is that you’re not in a situation that satisfies you. You want more from life. Even if you have ups and downs, you can have better. Pray for that, believe in that, and persevere in that.
 
Just think how many other people you would be helping by bringing it to the church leader etc…or whomever…you are not the only one , won’t be the first nor the last to have to work through this. If a solution is made as a result of getting the help, you’ll be able to pass on the solution to others maybe.
 
I’m going to try and talk to the priest in charge of the youth at my parish.Im going to go to church with my best friend for mass on Wednesday and after mass we’ll go and talk to father… she will be with me for moral support…she knows literally everything about me so I don’t mind her coming along…plus it will be better to have someone with me
 
That sounds like an excellent idea. The way to reduce anxiety is to do what makes you feel less anxious. That may seem obvious, but as you go through this you’re going to learn how to find strategies by using your own sense of what helps you feel more in control of your part of a situation.
 
Very good! That sounds like an excellent plan.

Since you are in college, you don’t need your parents permission to go for counseling. Your college probably has counseling available. Use it! As someone said earlier, it may be scary for you, but do it anyway! It could change your life for the better.

May God bless you!
 
I am not an expert so please don’t think that just because this works for me that it will work for you.

From time to time I have social anxiety in public places like church, theatres, trains etc. For me it comes in one of two forms. Either feel like I need to visit the bathroom when there is no way I could possibility need to go and the other is that I feel like I am going to be physically sick.

If I am in church and feel like I need to visit the bathroom when I know that I just went before the start of the service, I say to myself fine just wet yourself. Very quickly my head works out that its the anxiety thats saying that I need to go pee and not my body. Then next time at church I feel fine. Its as if the anxiety learns “oh telling him to go pee doesn’t work anymore. “

If you possibly can get professional help then do so.

Alex
 
if you suspect anxiety, it is a 100% treatable psychological/cognitive condition. In most cases, it can be addressed without drugs. You are far from alone: 1 in 5 in today’s culture suffers from some form of anxiety - 64 million in the US. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy is the gold standard in anxiety treatment, and it can even be done over the phone. Do ask doctor, as God greatly desires that you live in peace.
 
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I don’t know what country you are in, presume America? but in England they do CBT (cognitive behavioural counselling) which is just a type of counselling often used to treat phobia’s , over skype, or the internet which might be something they do there too? usually England is the one behind in technology lol, so I imagine if it’s here it is there, just depends on where you are and if it is offered. Anyway I only mention that so you know it may be an option, a lot of people find it a useful way to deal with any issues, some people are ill or to far away from a therapy session. It might be worth asking your doctor if such a thing is available for you, perhaps like the others have said you can set it up by email.
 
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